Hellobee Boards Topic: What does your day at home look like with your 4 year old?

Hellobee Boards Topic: What does your day at home look like with your 4 year old? https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 23 Apr 2026 16:22:33 +0000 MamaCate on "What does your day at home look like with your 4 year old?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-does-your-day-at-home-look-like-with-your-4-year-old#post-2795134 Thu, 04 Jan 2018 19:40:35 +0000 MamaCate 2795134@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @Mrs. Turtle: this sounds challenging! Two quick ideas: -we have. 6 yo and 2.5 yo. Sometimes separate play can be accomplished by the big kid doing something on top of the kitchen table (art, LEGO’s) while the little one can wander but can’t actually get at the materials and “ruin” the big one’s day. -if independent play is not a skill he has, try to think of it as something to eventually build to, not something to be frustrated he already has. So you could build on this through reallly short breaks that are reinforced and then lengthened...like can you finish this wall while I throw the wash in and come right back and wow great job or ok you need a little help, rinse and repeat. (You probably know this already by just in case!) mrsbookworm on "What does your day at home look like with your 4 year old?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-does-your-day-at-home-look-like-with-your-4-year-old#post-2795090 Thu, 04 Jan 2018 15:31:36 +0000 mrsbookworm 2795090@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I have a four yo boy and a three yo girl. My daughter is much better at independent play than my son for reasons unknown. My son likes me to play with him all. the. time. 😝. Sometimes he’ll play with LEGO’s, magnatiles or other building toys independently. He also likes to make thins out of leftover cardboard. Getting him active helps with the inattention and whining. If we can’t go out, we’ll play follow the leader or have a dance party in the house to get him moving. He also really likes to cook with me. Good luck! Mrs. Turtle on "What does your day at home look like with your 4 year old?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-does-your-day-at-home-look-like-with-your-4-year-old#post-2795088 Thu, 04 Jan 2018 15:16:24 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2795088@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @JCCovi: Thanks! We are working on finding ways to get him outside more. It's been pretty cold and damp here so we haven't been as good about it as we should be. Plus, he's healing from a broken arm, so we are trying to be careful. @Mrs. Lion: Good ideas. We have a lot of new toys from Christmas. He likes them, but wants you to be right there with him, but also doesn't want to share with O. So unless there are 2 parents home willing to be in separate rooms constantly, he isn't satisfied. Legos are hard because of O, but we might pick up a couple small sets. @honeybear: Naps are hard because he's been forced to nap and freaks out if you try to isolate him at all. Self harm, etc. So not an option. We are working on making him comfortable enough to rest. We are trying to maximize outdoor time, hiking, etc. Winter is hard! @looch: We do need to do more activities. Christmas break has been rough with so much excitement at the beginning setting up unrealistic expectations for the rest of the 2 weeks. I'm really looking forward to school starting! @bloved: Sounds like we need to get some legos and find a way for him to play with them away from O! kiddosc on "What does your day at home look like with your 4 year old?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-does-your-day-at-home-look-like-with-your-4-year-old#post-2795056 Thu, 04 Jan 2018 12:02:32 +0000 kiddosc 2795056@https://boards.hellobee.com/ My 22 month old plays much more independently than my 5 year old boy. I attribute some of it to personality, some to age. At that age, and still actually, he really needed a lot of physical activity. I notice a huge difference in his behavior and listening ability if he's been cooped up all day. The problem with that is that it really needs to involve another person. Someone to kick a ball with, someone to race, someone to ride bikes with, someone to build a snowman with, someone to push him on the swing. Really the only independent activities he enjoys are coloring/drawing, or sometimes legos. Otherwise, he always asking for someone to play games, play action figures, build lego towers, read books, etc. Silva on "What does your day at home look like with your 4 year old?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-does-your-day-at-home-look-like-with-your-4-year-old#post-2795055 Thu, 04 Jan 2018 11:58:31 +0000 Silva 2795055@https://boards.hellobee.com/ OH- think about how you set up your space, to encourage independence. We have all art stuff where my daughter can access it (but the baby can’t). We recently got her a little music player so she can play music or listen to some recordings of her Dad reading her favorite books. Cups, plates, etc are where she can reach them. If she has to interrupt her play to ask for something it can kind of end any independent play that was happening Mrs. Lion on "What does your day at home look like with your 4 year old?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-does-your-day-at-home-look-like-with-your-4-year-old#post-2795054 Thu, 04 Jan 2018 11:45:29 +0000 Mrs. Lion 2795054@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @Silva: Yes to cooperative board games! We love Hoot Hoot Owl and Count your Chickens. Both are super cute and my 4 year old boy loves them. :) We also got him a Snap Circuits set for Christmas that requires a lot of supervision and a little modification because it is geared for older kids, but he can build the simplest circuits on his own and thinks it is AMAZING! :) We do this stuff when my daughter isn't around though, because she isn't quite old enough to play and it frustrates everyone when she wants to be involved but just can't quite do it yet. I should add, outdoor play is an obvious first choice for activities...I didn't mention that before because I thought you were looking for indoor/independent ideas :) Silva on "What does your day at home look like with your 4 year old?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-does-your-day-at-home-look-like-with-your-4-year-old#post-2795053 Thu, 04 Jan 2018 11:32:08 +0000 Silva 2795053@https://boards.hellobee.com/ My daughter will be 5 this spring, and she is, admittedly, a pretty stellar independent player and a low key kid. That said, our days look something like this (she also has a 17 month old brother) wake up, eat breakfast (she often works on an art project of some kind while waiting for breakfast or right after) independent play while I clean up go outside to feed chickens, and then play outside come in, play inside (sometimes I set up a big plastic bin with bird seed in it, scoops, trucks, animals, etc- she and the baby will both play with that for quite some time). She is very into small world play- setting up the farm/animals. Also, playing store is a big hit. Lunch time After lunch the baby takes a nap. I spend about 30 minutes doing something with just her, playing a game, baking, something like that. Then I read two books to her, and then she has a quiet time where she is alone in her room (toys, books). If this is too much, she sometimes listens to audio stories on the couch. I try to make quiet time be about an hour. After quiet time we try to go outside again. She often likes to help cook, and loves washing dishes. I find she really likes being included in chores in meaningful ways (carrying wood, whatever I can think of. She's really quite capable) On Tuesdays we go to storytime in the morning. If the weather is bad on Thursday, I sometimes take them to a local art studio that has open hours in the morning. She has a best friend, and when that friend comes over the basically fully entertain themselves- so playdates are great In better weather we often do the playground once a week or so. For a fun treat and to get energy out- she had a BLAST at the local trampoline park (just go early before big kids show up!) We often bake together on Thursday afternoons. She goes to preschool M/W/F all day. On friday afternoons she watches 3 show. Its a fun age. They are capable of doing lots of stuff. But remember they are emotionally still very young- that executive functioning isn't there yet. So they can communicate and do a lot, but arent' really good about thinking ahead, thinking of consequences, or managing difficult emotions. With a child who has experienced trauma this is likely to be even more pronounced. She likes to have special alone time. We just started reading the Little House series and its been really special. We also do a game night once a week (oh- board games are great! I can give you a list of cooperative ones that we play if you'd like) where she gets to stay up a little later (like, half an hour) and have popcorn and play a game and do a puzzle with just me and her dad. ALV91711 on "What does your day at home look like with your 4 year old?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-does-your-day-at-home-look-like-with-your-4-year-old#post-2795031 Thu, 04 Jan 2018 10:22:55 +0000 ALV91711 2795031@https://boards.hellobee.com/ DS will be 5 this spring. Some days he will play most of the day by himself and others he wants me for every single thing. Getting outside to play and explore is good. DS also loves legos. I was surprised over Christmas break that he napped every day. I know he does at daycare but he doesn't always on weekends. Try and find what toys he likes to play with and those should help with getting him to play independently. honeybear on "What does your day at home look like with your 4 year old?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-does-your-day-at-home-look-like-with-your-4-year-old#post-2795023 Thu, 04 Jan 2018 09:43:21 +0000 honeybear 2795023@https://boards.hellobee.com/ One other thought: have you got friends with little boys? I think it's really helpful to have another little boy or two around regularly, especially if the other one is a tad older and exhibits the sorts of behavior/interests you'd like to cultivate. Having a reference point is one reason, but finding him a buddy whose behavior you don't mind him copying could be a big help. twodoghouse on "What does your day at home look like with your 4 year old?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-does-your-day-at-home-look-like-with-your-4-year-old#post-2795021 Thu, 04 Jan 2018 09:36:18 +0000 twodoghouse 2795021@https://boards.hellobee.com/ My LOs are a little younger (will be 4 in May), so take this with a grain of salt! But is there any chance he’ll nap for you in the afternoon? Your description of him as the day goes on sounds JUST like my son when he’s running on fumes and needs a nap. I know you said he’s in transitional kinder - will he be there all day or just half day? If he won’t nap, I’d see if you can get him to bed really early to get him enough sleep to make it through the next day. As far as my days at home with two 3.5 year olds, we do a lot of art projects (nothing fancy, just free access to markers, crayons, watercolors) and a ton of legos. I know you have younger ones at home too, so I’d probably keep a big bin of duplos around so there aren’t too many tiny pieces. I think my kids are actually fairly good at independent play, but they still want me to be right there when they’re playing to show me things or just see where I am. Does he have any specific interests that you could get him some toys and books related to? Dinosaurs, cars, toy food, dolls? Maybe if he had a few things geared toward his specific interests he would stay interested in them longer? bloved on "What does your day at home look like with your 4 year old?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-does-your-day-at-home-look-like-with-your-4-year-old#post-2794995 Thu, 04 Jan 2018 07:58:21 +0000 bloved 2794995@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Another vote for legos. My son is 4 and that is his absolute favorite and most independent activity. He can sit and do that for a solid 45 minutes without break. Other than that, he does like to do interactive things. Cooking together is a big one for my son, or “projects” (coloring/cutting/taping things). Any day when we can do things outside are a lot better, because he does have a ton of pent up energy that he needs to expend. looch on "What does your day at home look like with your 4 year old?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-does-your-day-at-home-look-like-with-your-4-year-old#post-2794990 Thu, 04 Jan 2018 07:45:27 +0000 looch 2794990@https://boards.hellobee.com/ My son isn't the best at independent play, I kind of expected it to just happen, but I learned that if he was faced with a full playroom of things, he just dumped everything on the floor, as opposed to playing with anything. He needed some structure, to be shown what to do. I basically set up stations for him, where he had one thing to do, be it magnatile building, duplos (he still uses these with his wooden trains), arts and crafts (primarily playdoh with tools and few vehicles). I also found that my son had the ability to control simple remote control vehicles, so we have sets of cones that we set up in the driveway and we will race cars for hours...until the batteries run out, lol. I also found that for a full day of being at home, I need to do a morning activity. It doesn't need to be expensive, we go to the trails at the nature center for free, the beach for free, whatever. Then we come home, have lunch, and do some structured activity. It might be building a lego or a 3d puzzle, or recently, building a house out of shoe boxes and found objects. Sometimes we collect sticks and then later on, we'll wrap them in yarn. We display these in the house in a vase. We also had a sandbox in the backyard that was great, but i realize in cold weather, this isn't a solution. So, we go outside a ton even in the cold weather. I bought my son the proper gear and he asks to go outside. He'll be begging to go today, even though it's storming. I know some kids are perfectly fine playing with boxes and odds and ends, but my son isn't one of those kids. Wherever we go, even on vacation, I need to pack some activities for us to do and we are all happier for it. Good luck! honeybear on "What does your day at home look like with your 4 year old?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-does-your-day-at-home-look-like-with-your-4-year-old#post-2794989 Thu, 04 Jan 2018 07:36:19 +0000 honeybear 2794989@https://boards.hellobee.com/ My son needed a boatload of physical activity at 4. Like, several hours outside in both the morning and afternoon. Strenuous stuff like hiking or swimming is ideal. Activities that are mostly sitting are not. (He'll get there, but 4 is not that point.) I saved the sitting time for reading. At 5ish he was entertaining himself pretty well on an as-needed basis (he really took off on doing things on his own initiative sometime during the year he was 5), but I distinctly remember that he required a lot more hands on time at 4 than the same age girls I knew typically did. So, I would start with exercise. And think 'boot camp' not 'swing set' when you're planning what to do. :silly: For quiet time, I second Legos. You will probably have to help with some sets, but the Juniors line is pretty good. Find an appealing theme and try a couple out. Lastly, don't give up on naps. My son didn't fully drop until 5. At 4 he still needed at least a few per week. If you up the physical movement, he might need one. Mrs. Lion on "What does your day at home look like with your 4 year old?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-does-your-day-at-home-look-like-with-your-4-year-old#post-2794981 Thu, 04 Jan 2018 06:35:15 +0000 Mrs. Lion 2794981@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Do you have age appropriate toys? He is your first older kiddo, right? Mine acts that way when he is either overwhelmed, overtired, or bored. He loves legos (he is pretty good with the small kind and they are a bit more challenging and require more focus. If you are going to buy a new set, there is a set at target in the $25 range that is our fave because it has lots of wheels. C could build cars for days. Other favorite indoor activities....fort building, hot wheels cars (target sells really cheap tracks that they can build and run all over the house. They are pretty bendable so they can build over furniture etc. to make ramps.) Hot wheels cars are pretty inexpensive too. He also loves stickers and watercolor paints. Also, we save recyleable materials and other random stuff and put them in what we call his "project box". He has a pair of scissors and a roll of psinters tape and will make all sorts of random things. JCCovi on "What does your day at home look like with your 4 year old?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-does-your-day-at-home-look-like-with-your-4-year-old#post-2794970 Thu, 04 Jan 2018 00:08:14 +0000 JCCovi 2794970@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Oh, and playdates are the golden standard for wearing my daughter out so she can play calmly in the afternoon! Even if it's not a formal playdate, finding a playground that generally has kids on it works! JCCovi on "What does your day at home look like with your 4 year old?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-does-your-day-at-home-look-like-with-your-4-year-old#post-2794969 Thu, 04 Jan 2018 00:05:25 +0000 JCCovi 2794969@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I have a 4-year-old girl and a boy who will turn 3 this month. Definitely, the days get harder towards the end of the day and behavior/listening/patience goes down for everyone involved. She can play independently or with her brother but sometimes she just wants to be entertained. For activities, my 4 year old loves building sets, art, sand play, dress up, imaginary play with figures or dolls, etc. She can really latch on to anything. She loves to be read books and can sit for quite long ones now or chapters without pictures. Although it sounds like my daughter is easier then your foster son, I've found a couple things help her focus. (1) Not have any screen time unless it's a show right before nap or bed, their behavior really deteriorates if I let them having something in the morning. I usually avoid it entirely except maybe once a week, but a nap or night seems to reset them. (2) Get active. Independent play at home is much much easier if they have played for 1-2 hours at the playground that day. The more the better! By the time bedtime rolls around I can really tell whether or not we played outside that morning. Good luck! Mrs. Turtle on "What does your day at home look like with your 4 year old?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-does-your-day-at-home-look-like-with-your-4-year-old#post-2794968 Wed, 03 Jan 2018 23:54:34 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2794968@https://boards.hellobee.com/ We took placement of a 4, almost 5 year old little guy the Friday before Christmas. Things are mostly going ok, though it's been a tough adjustment for all of us. He's in transitional kinder, so I think things will improve when school starts again on Monday. But there will still be weekends and holidays, not to mention summer (though we have plans for at least half time day care). So...what does your day at home look like with a 4 year old? I'm trying to figure out if he is fairly typical or if he has some challenges beyond his trauma that are making it particularly hard for him. I'm not super experienced with 4 year old boys so I'm really not sure what to expect of him. Right now he does great a lot of the day but has a really hard time entertaining himself at all, and as the day goes he gets more and more "tuned out," not listening, not retaining, unable to follow pretty simple instructions, etc. It looks a bit like ADHD, although some of the time he isn't at all like that and seems very capable of paying attention, focusing, etc. Does he just need more structure than a day at home? Is it just christmas break and we need to wait it out? What kinds of activities do your 4-5 year olds do and are they able to play independently at all? At the moment, O (26 months) is far more independent.