https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 26 Apr 2026 05:41:13 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-the-heck-happened#post-2019681 Mon, 12 Jan 2015 02:44:20 +0000 StbHisMrs 2019681@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We're going through this with our 3 year old now, except that I have a lock on her door so she sits at the door and bangs on it. She shares a room with her 17 month old sister, so it disrupts her sleep too. It's 11:45pm and 5 minutes ago she was sneaking out throwing her blanket and pillow in the hallway. I am so over this!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-the-heck-happened#post-2019678 Mon, 12 Jan 2015 02:21:50 +0000 birdofafeather 2019678@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@irene: So awesome!! I fear the day this is us. She's already wanting us to stay in the room while she falls asleep. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-the-heck-happened#post-2019474 Sun, 11 Jan 2015 20:18:08 +0000 mrbee 2019474@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@irene: High five!!! Seriously, huge congrats! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-the-heck-happened#post-2019471 Sun, 11 Jan 2015 20:16:34 +0000 irene 2019471@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>2 nights in a row now! Quietness! Wow!! (fingers crossed it's only 8:16pm) What do I do without you guys?!??????! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-the-heck-happened#post-2018783 Sat, 10 Jan 2015 21:41:29 +0000 mrbee 2018783@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@irene: We had the exact same thing happen with the lights and the nighttime playing!! We eventually had to put light switch guards on the switches... plus a night light. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-the-heck-happened#post-2018778 Sat, 10 Jan 2015 21:39:03 +0000 autumn865 2018778@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I feel like I could have written this post! We are going through this same exact thing with our two year old. It happens for naps and bedtime and we/I go in from one to five times. It's rediculous because the last time going in she is EXHAUSTED and can barely keep her eyes opened. I've totally lost my cool on several occasions. When I go in I try to stay firm and brief. I retuck her in, give a quick kiss and leave but my LO like yours will not leave her bed but just escalate until I go in. So really no suggestions just letting you know you're not alone! Hoping this is a SHORT phase.... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-the-heck-happened#post-2018727 Sat, 10 Jan 2015 21:00:15 +0000 irene 2018727@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@jmarionsmith: hahahahhaa </p> <p>Oh you know it was so quiet tonight I felt weird so I went down half an hour ago. (which was 10 minutes after bedtime). The light in his room is turned ON. Very brightly. I went in and saw that he had dragged his train lego box and was playing very quietly on the floor. Gahhhh!!!!! Well, we lured him back to sleep allowing him to hold onto one of the train cars, and threaten to take away the trains for 2 days if he doesn't sleep. But man, that was new. </p> <p>Otherwise, it's been quiet since (for more than half an hour now). I am keeping my fingers crossed and I have no incentive to go and see what he is up to now. I hope he is sleeping.</p> <p>ETA: And dang it why didn't I buy a video monitor back in the days?????? !!!!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-the-heck-happened#post-2018708 Sat, 10 Jan 2015 20:48:58 +0000 jmarionsmith 2018708@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>good luck tonight! </p> <p>we are going through this right now with our almost 2.5 year old. </p> <p>"mommy i'm cold!" give him a blanket "mommy i'm too hot!" </p> <p>"mom, i have a booger." </p> <p>"mom, where is (insert random toy that he suddenly needs to sleep with)" </p> <p>(watch him unplug his night light on the monitor) "mommy, it's too dark!"</p> <p> :meh: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-the-heck-happened#post-2018675 Sat, 10 Jan 2015 20:20:15 +0000 mrbee 2018675@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@irene: So exciting!! Good luck!!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-the-heck-happened#post-2018673 Sat, 10 Jan 2015 20:19:31 +0000 irene 2018673@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thank you all! I just put him to bed after going through everything that he might ask for and ensuring that he has everything he needed, explained to him that he can not call "mommy mommy" no more, and even if he cries and cries, I am not going to go in because I know he is fine. He can only call me if he needs help using the potty (which he just used the potty). 5 minutes now. We'll see how it goes LOL </p> <p>Thank you all again!!!! I hope I will turn this ship around! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-the-heck-happened#post-2017985 Sat, 10 Jan 2015 04:56:07 +0000 regberadaisy 2017985@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes, we did and still do some nights. But when she started we nipped it in in the butt fairly quick. After about the second or third fake request we will tell her "no more tricks. Time for night night". If she faked again we we would just let her cry. After a few times of letting her cry she knows that when we say "no more tricks" we mean it and won't come back in. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-the-heck-happened#post-2017970 Sat, 10 Jan 2015 03:31:03 +0000 Cherrybee 2017970@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>E has never been a good sleeper but going down at bedtime was usually not our issue. However, since she turned into a toddler (still young at 17.5 months) she has refused sleep. Its not unusual for her crying/shenanigans to last from 7pm until 10. I also need to sleep train because I know she's playing us but it is so hard letting her cry until she is sick. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-the-heck-happened#post-2017926 Sat, 10 Jan 2015 01:01:51 +0000 MamaT 2017926@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yup. This is my almost 3yr old son. Every night. 6... 7.... 341 times a night. Except mine continuously gets out of bed. As suggested, before we leave the room I remind him that he has everything he needs: Kleenex and Chapstick on his nightstand; water bottle; nightlight on etc... I have him repeat it to me so I know he understands he has everything he needs- and he can get it without me. When this only solved the problem a little bit, we finally put a gate at his door. Then he got smart and would yell that he had to go to the bathroom. Of course we would go get him but he didn't really need to go (and I swear he can pee on demand just to irk me!) His bedroom is connected to his bathroom, so this week I have put him to bed in a pull-up instead of a diaper so that he can go to the bathroom without us. This has made a big(ger) difference. (Now he only gets out of bed 13 times :silly: ) The past three nights he has stayed in bed because I bribed him with getting to watch an episode of Super Why :bummed: Total parent fail but the bribe has worked! So no good advice except I feel your frustration!!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-the-heck-happened#post-2017924 Sat, 10 Jan 2015 01:00:19 +0000 Mrs. High Heels 2017924@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@irene: i'm sorry you're going through this! i hate to tell you that we've been dealing with toddler sleep since she turned 2, and she just turned 4. it is way easier now... but she doesn't sleep until 9:30 pm (though she does still take 1.5-2 hour naps so there's that). </p> <p>the stalling isn't as bad as it was at first, but i think it's probably also bc our expectations changed, and we're a lot more efficient - we have her teeth brushed, make her go potty, and make sure we have her cup of water with ice by her bed all by the time we're ready to tuck her in. </p> <p>when all this first started it was tough because we were so used to 2 years of amazing sleep and early bedtimes! we'd just plop her in bed at 7:30 pm and that was that! i think she wore us down - we're just too tired to fight anymore so we just do what we have to do to get her to sleep. </p> <p>here's our current situation -- we've placed a floor mattress next to our bed and let her sleep in our room (we only recently started doing this bc we wanted to night train her for pee, but she shares a room with DS so we didn't want to worry about waking him up when changing sheets, etc in the motn). though after we started doing that, bedtimes have honestly become a breeze and we have been loving it. we tell her that if she wants to sleep in our room she has to go to sleep first bc mommy and daddy have stuff to do and we're older so we sleep later. somehow that clicks with her and she is okay with it! so we do still get our alone time, but not until after 9:30 pm. i have late bedtimes (midnight-1 am) because i need those few hours of alone time at night!</p> <p>my son is 22 months and i am bracing myself for the same thing. he has been fighting bedtimes lately, but is still in his crib so luckily we're not quite there yet!</p> <p>eta: reward charts worked really well for us when she was in her 3's to get her to stay in her own bed and in her own room (she didn't really get it in the 2's). have you tried that? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-the-heck-happened#post-2017903 Sat, 10 Jan 2015 00:14:18 +0000 mrbee 2017903@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@irene: It was easy for me to be tough when we did those 17 minutes of CIO, but for some reason it was much, much harder for me to do something similar when we had toddler bedtime problems. Probably because I was much closer to Charlie by then, since I was his primary caregiver after Bee got morning sickness with Olive!</p> <p>We did see a night-and-day difference with the kids' sleep both times, and I chose to focus on that rather than any distress during the process. Some people aren't comfortable with any distress though, and that's totally fine! Sometimes these things sort themselves out over time... I just lost patience with the whole process, since I wasn't getting any sleep. Eventually the exhaustion just wore me down! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-the-heck-happened#post-2017902 Sat, 10 Jan 2015 00:10:36 +0000 irene 2017902@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee: Sometimes I wonder where does the "tough love" line draw before we start creating psychological issues lol. Like ignoring your child crying for a very long stretch of time! And I did it to him when he was a baby! lol :( OK Let me think about it....</p> <p>It's almost like now we don't physically abuse our children but we emotionally torture them (well, they torture us emotionally as well but quoting from my husband, "you asked for it" lol). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-the-heck-happened#post-2017901 Sat, 10 Jan 2015 00:07:15 +0000 mrbee 2017901@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@irene: I was the same when Charlie was having toddler bedtime problems! Haha we're both the weakest link. Once I got a bit tougher though, he had no problems! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-the-heck-happened#post-2017900 Sat, 10 Jan 2015 00:02:35 +0000 irene 2017900@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee: I dunno why it was so much easier to ignore the cry when they were babies. I had no problem let him CIO when we were sleep training. But now I just feel so bad because this boy can talk and he knows what he wants (even though he changes his mind) I feel very bad if I ignore him. And he just keeps on crying. Now that you say that, I did let him cry for a very very long stretch of time when he was a baby because I wanted him to go to sleep on his own. Now I feel really bad and guilty that I did it. ahhh. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-the-heck-happened#post-2017898 Sat, 10 Jan 2015 00:00:00 +0000 irene 2017898@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee: I just re- read your child psychologist part. Dang. Our pediatrician is married to a child psychologist. Let me email him and ask him if he has suggestions for me. !!!!!!!!!!!! Thanks!!!!!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-the-heck-happened#post-2017892 Fri, 09 Jan 2015 23:51:16 +0000 mrbee 2017892@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@irene: I'm suggesting that no one go in there!</p> <p>When we sleep trained Charlie for the first time, Bee left the house because if she stayed home.... she definitely would have gone in to get him. He ended up crying for 17 minutes, then passed out! Then I texted her, and she came home.</p> <p>We had a similar success when we stopped going into his room during his toddler bedtime shenanigans! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-the-heck-happened#post-2017875 Fri, 09 Jan 2015 23:28:50 +0000 irene 2017875@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee: Oh no, he changes his mind. First, he didn't want his blankie because he is "too big". Then, he cried and wanted his blankie. He want us to close the door. Then, he get out to put a stool outside so the door remains open. Then, he cried and wanted us to close the door. "Mommy mommy I want a bandaid I have a boo-boo". (Gives bandaid, 5 minutes) "Mommy mommy! My boo boo is good now, Can you peel it off?" There are many of these items that flips flops for several times each night. And the constant search of something: "Mommy mommy! Where is my __________??? (sticker? Choo choo train? Bus? Engineer? fill in the blanks) Then there are times, "Mommy!! Mommy! Mommy! Waaa waaaa" "What do you want now??" " I don't know.... heh". Grrrr!!!!!!!!!! But ok, I will try that...</p> <p>I can't leave the house because every time the husband goes in he cries. And he cries when he is ignored. And many times husband isn't even in because he's traveling. I wish I could leave the house. I would leave the house EVERY NIGHT LOL </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-the-heck-happened#post-2017867 Fri, 09 Jan 2015 23:21:13 +0000 mrbee 2017867@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@irene: I would make a list of everything he asks for, and write it all down. Then I'd go over the list with him, and make sure to do everything together before you leave the room. Then explain that when he calls you to come back, you won't be coming back because he'll already have done everything.</p> <p>Then I'd just leave the house for 5-10 minutes! I wouldn't be surprised if he just passes out asleep once he realizes that you're not coming back as soon as he calls for you.</p> <p>One last thought on this stuff: I talked to a child psychologist friend of mine when we were going through something similar to this, and he made a good point. He said that whatever my gut instinct was on this topic, it didn't sound like it was working since following my instinct was consistently creating this problem for our family. He was totally right and once I changed tactics, the problems we had resolved themselves incredibly quickly! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-the-heck-happened#post-2017862 Fri, 09 Jan 2015 23:14:50 +0000 irene 2017862@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Pancakes: Oh no! 4 is not ASAP!!! What???? :( What am I going to do :(</p> <p>@mrbee: I remember reading that post. But mine doesn't get out (of the room). And some of his million requests involves leaving a gap at the door (so he feels safe as he can see light outside?). I think he would go bananas if we do not offer that option. besides, he really doesn't care if he can get out of the room 70% of the time. He want me to go in, for nothing. Every 5 minutes. Sometimes I feel like a slave.</p> <p>I think part of the problem is I talk too much with him and I respond to him every time - but sometimes there are valid reasons why he wanted me (eg. to help him using the potty and putting diaper back on). I don't know what to do. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-the-heck-happened#post-2017786 Fri, 09 Jan 2015 22:09:47 +0000 mrbee 2017786@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@irene: Went through a similar situation for months and months!! It was so painful!<br /> <a href="http://www.hellobee.com/2012/07/17/how-to-avoid-sleeping-next-to-your-child-until-they-fall-asleep/" rel="nofollow">http://www.hellobee.com/2012/07/17/how-to-avoid-sleeping-next-to-your-child-until-they-fall-asleep/</a></p> <p>Finally we put a lock on the door for a few days and he realized we weren't coming every time he called anymore. Problem solved, and we even took the lock off after that but things still went well. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-the-heck-happened#post-2017780 Fri, 09 Jan 2015 22:06:51 +0000 Pancakes 2017780@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm sorry to say that my daughter is almost 4 and we have been dealing with this quite frequently over the past year. Bedtime is often easier if she skips her afternoon nap, but then we might be subjected to a cranky preschooler all afternoon/evening. No advice, really, just commiseration. I am pretty sure it won't be like this forever, but it is pretty frustrating in the meantime. I have noticed that the closer we get to age 4, the better things seem to be getting behavior-wise. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-the-heck-happened#post-2017747 Fri, 09 Jan 2015 21:35:15 +0000 irene 2017747@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Have you seen this?</p> <p><a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/honest-toddler/how-to-put-a-toddler-to-bed-in-100-easy-steps_b_4968226.html" rel="nofollow">http://www.huffingtonpost.com/honest-toddler/how-to-put-a-toddler-to-bed-in-100-easy-steps_b_4968226.html</a></p> <p>Only it would take me 200 steps to put my almost 3-year-old to sleep. The extra 100 steps comes in AFTER he was in bed, lights turned off. Then, Mommy! I want to pee. Mommy! Can you put on my diaper? (after he tried to use the potty by himself.) Mommy! I am afraid of the giraffe (in his room). Mommy! I have a boo-boo I need a band-aid (he doesn't). Mommy! I want to open the door. Mommy! Can you turn on the lights (no). Mommy! I want my choo-choo train. Mommy! Where is my sticker? Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! Insert crying and trantrum in between randomly. If daddy goes in, also cue massive tantrum. </p> <p>His bedtime would be 7:30 to 8pm. Every night I would be summoned back to his room for at least 6-7 times a night until he falls asleep. Sometimes it would be as late as 9-10pm.</p> <p>I mean I watched Super Nanny and she would ask the parent to carry the crying child back to his bed and say so calm and sweetly, dear, it is bedtime. And leave. But mine doesn't come out, he just constantly ask for things. If I ignore him, he'd start crying, and he wouldn't stop until someone (as in yours truly) goes in. His room is one floor down from my attic office. I am so sick of going down and coming back up only to go back down after 5 minutes for an hour every night. I lose my temper every night. </p> <p>This happens regardless if bedtime was 6:30pm or 9pm. </p> <p>Did you ever go through this? Is this a stage and when the heck does this end? Bedtime used to be a piece of cake between 6 months and 2 years. I really can not deal with this anymore. I need my me time after he goes to bed. I can not keep dealing with him until 10pm when he finally falls asleep and I didn't accomplish anything. God help me :-(</p> <p>Any advice? I really need to get out of this ASAP. </p>