https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 22 Apr 2026 19:50:22 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy/page/2#post-2754764 Tue, 04 Jul 2017 07:57:20 +0000 ElbieKay 2754764@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My MIL is a religious Christian, and I am a secular Jew who is skeptical of organized religion. Every once in awhile she brings up Jesus, and it makes me cringe. Luckily my husband usually cuts her off. I don't trust her not to proselytize to my son which is one of a bazillion reasons why I won't leave her alone with him. He is three. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy/page/2#post-2754587 Mon, 03 Jul 2017 14:23:07 +0000 pachamama 2754587@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Goose: omg terrible. Never ok. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy/page/2#post-2754579 Mon, 03 Jul 2017 13:54:21 +0000 Kimberlybee 2754579@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I thought of this post when I read this</p> <p><a href="http://www.rd.com/advice/parenting/compliments-that-are-hurtful/" rel="nofollow">http://www.rd.com/advice/parenting/compliments-that-are-hurtful/</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy#post-2741427 Mon, 29 May 2017 19:08:16 +0000 Mrs. Goose 2741427@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>"Sexy legs". Sigh. It isn't often, but why. For a toddler. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy#post-2741360 Mon, 29 May 2017 14:20:59 +0000 Ajsmommy 2741360@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't like when the in laws say to dd "big girls don't...xyz" meaning she's a big girl so she shouldn't be doing those things. Ok. Excuse me but dd is only THREE. Let her be!! </p> <p>They also got her a book about giving up her blankey. Infuriates me. I hid that book. She can have her blankey for as long as she wants! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy#post-2741338 Mon, 29 May 2017 10:22:14 +0000 Cherrybee 2741338@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My MIL is constantly talking in front of E about how she can't eat XYZ because doesn't want to get fat etc. It weirds me out a little bit, but not enough to say anything. </p> <p>I was appalled yesterday, though, at a neighbour's barbecue, when I heard a woman chastising her 7 year old son for "sitting like a girl" (with his legs crossed). If my parents /inlaws ever said anything like that to my girls I would have to say something. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy#post-2741279 Mon, 29 May 2017 01:41:20 +0000 SugarplumsMom 2741279@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom is constantly telling DD how pretty or cute she is. I get that we're on Skype and she lives too far away, but it's like she can't have a normal conversation and DD is now old enough to actually share stories. </p> <p>I don't want to put emphasis on anyone's physical attributes. I've tried telling her, but it hasn't really helped. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy#post-2741270 Sun, 28 May 2017 22:14:41 +0000 agold 2741270@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@catlady: @Kimberlybee: Very interesting! Thank you for sharing that link!! I'm pretty simple with my girl. I hope I don't do her a disservice! :grin: :shocked: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy#post-2741263 Sun, 28 May 2017 21:31:53 +0000 lady baltimore 2741263@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I haven't heard it about my LO yet, but my MIL has a tendency to label my niece and nephew in ways that drive me crazy. In response to what I saw as normal toddler busy-ness, she told my SIL, "I have four letters for you: ADHD." I replied, "How about B-A-B-Y?!" I know I will lose my shit if she tries to pathologize DD like that.</p> <p>Other than that, though, we are pretty lucky both with my parents and my in-laws. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy#post-2741255 Sun, 28 May 2017 20:28:51 +0000 anonysquire 2741255@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents make big deals about my 3yr olds outfit choices or immodesty while swimming. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy#post-2740965 Fri, 26 May 2017 21:18:21 +0000 2littlepumpkins 2740965@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm not super picky about what people say because I figure I can't control everyone and not everything that everyone does has to be our common practice at home for the at home stuff to be effective.</p> <p>That said when they let my kid/s pretend to drink beer it makes me cringe and I let it be known!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy#post-2740964 Fri, 26 May 2017 20:47:03 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2740964@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Luckily not my own parents or in laws, but O's bio grandparents like to comment on gender stereotypes ALL.THE.TIME. Drives me crazy. I think they're worried we are trying to turn them both gay. T loves sparkly things, new clothes and purses. O's grandpa has started saying, "you don't want that! It's for girls!" And although O is often the more adventurous one, they constantly comment on how she's "all girl" or "such a girl." </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy#post-2740863 Fri, 26 May 2017 14:52:09 +0000 catgirl 2740863@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH's grandmother always asks DD when she is going to "piss on the pot." It's gross and trashy to me. She says a lot of other obnoxious things but this is the one that gets me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy#post-2740859 Fri, 26 May 2017 14:39:15 +0000 winter_wonder 2740859@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@travellingbee: I think I might just be extra sensitive to it bc my mom was always commenting on appearance and weight when I was growing up. Most people probably wouldn't be bothered by it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy#post-2740857 Fri, 26 May 2017 14:29:52 +0000 travellingbee 2740857@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@winter_wonder: oh. :sad: I love chunky baby thighs and comment on them on my own kid's also other people's. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy#post-2740853 Fri, 26 May 2017 14:20:22 +0000 winter_wonder 2740853@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom often comments on DD's legs. "Look at those big chunky thighs!!!" She's 1, but I still find it annoying. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy#post-2740850 Fri, 26 May 2017 14:18:09 +0000 Kimberlybee 2740850@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@catlady: That's pretty cool that we were thinking of the same article. I agree that commenting on hard work is better in the long run! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy#post-2740822 Fri, 26 May 2017 13:26:08 +0000 catlady 2740822@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Kimberlybee: Ha, you beat me to it. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy#post-2740821 Fri, 26 May 2017 13:25:35 +0000 catlady 2740821@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@agold: We prefer to comment on how hard she works or how much she practices as opposed to how naturally smart she is. This is partially due to research that is out and partially due to my own experience as a kid.<br /> <a href="https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/the-secret-to-raising-smart-kids1/" rel="nofollow">https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/the-secret-to-raising-smart-kids1/</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy#post-2740818 Fri, 26 May 2017 13:23:52 +0000 Kimberlybee 2740818@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@agold: <a href="https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/the-secret-to-raising-smart-kids1/" rel="nofollow">https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/the-secret-to-raising-smart-kids1/</a></p> <p>I read this article and similar ones like it and it brought some great points. I also add great job or good work or brilliant thinking now instead of "you're so smart". </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy#post-2740805 Fri, 26 May 2017 13:14:56 +0000 agold 2740805@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My MIL uses the word "caca." She also made a comment about my baby grabbing her daddy a beer. I want my girl to keep it classy and both of those things make me cringe. </p> <p> @catlady: can you share why you don't like your daughter being told she is smart? I'm just so curious because I always tell my girl that she is smart and sweet! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy#post-2740759 Fri, 26 May 2017 11:31:09 +0000 travellingbee 2740759@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@erinbaderin: I love it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy#post-2740732 Fri, 26 May 2017 11:08:09 +0000 Twolittlemen 2740732@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>ugh. My mom will tell my boys I can't eat something because I'm "on a diet". Like if they are having ice cream and are like "momma, do you want some?/why aren't you having any?" she will say "momma, cant have that, she's on a diet" </p> <p>I'm very careful to never say that. I always correct her and say "no, mommy could have some but she doesn't want/ is choosing not to right now" </p> <p>I can remember very early both my parents always being on different diets. They have both been overweight my entire life and weight and diet is also something I have struggled with my entire life. </p> <p>my husband and I eat very differently than our families and so do our kids. We talk about eating healthy food and limiting special treats but try not to focus on it. </p> <p>I also am trying to teach my kids not to comment on or monitor others food choices because this is one of my pet peeves of other adults. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy#post-2740722 Fri, 26 May 2017 10:56:03 +0000 Bluebonnet 2740722@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My Mom talks about dieting and how she's "being good" so she can't eat x, y, or z. </p> <p>My MIL is always commenting on everyone's weight and eating habits. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy#post-2740702 Fri, 26 May 2017 10:36:56 +0000 erinbaderin 2740702@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@travellingbee: My in-laws once wanted to buy my (then) 2 year old a present at the aquarium. He picked up a pink seahorse. My father in-law took it out of his hands, replaced it with a blue one, and said "Ok, you can have this one." I was furious. As revenge, when they asked us to buy him a Christmas present from them I bought a baby doll and stroller. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy#post-2740699 Fri, 26 May 2017 10:33:26 +0000 PawPrints 2740699@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>She's gotten a lot better since I've spoken up many times, but my mom is obsessed with enforcing gender roles. Says "oh that is ALL girl" when DD gets upset that her hands are dirty, or "such a little fashionista!" when she picks up a bag or purse and carries it. Uh, lots of people carry bags. </p> <p>Both our moms used to call her "tiny" ALL the time. She was like 40th percentile for weight. I think my mom assumed it was a compliment since of course I would want my daughter to be thin? I made it clear it upset me and that there's nothing wrong with DD's size (and even if there were, it would be pretty unhelpful to mention it all the time). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy#post-2740651 Fri, 26 May 2017 09:37:05 +0000 alphagam84 2740651@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My MIL has referenced cigarettes to my daughter and it is so weird. When she was only 3 weeks old and MIL was holding DD she said "a cute little pocket to put your cigarette in" while commenting on her outfit. Huh? Then a month or so ago (DD was 17 months) she said to DD she was "holding onto her paci like it is a cigarette". They don't smoke. It is so weird. Each time I was like did I hear that right? If she says it again I think I'm going to say something. She also said DD was wearing "sexy underwear" when commenting on her cloth diaper and another time said Emma is smart unlike those other dumb babies. The woman has no filter and says the weirdest things. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy#post-2740569 Fri, 26 May 2017 07:27:18 +0000 littlebug 2740569@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oh, and my MIL teaches the kids really silly things that I can't stand. Just because they're children does not mean they have to use childish speech. Like, kids can say, "All done" or "I'm done" when they're done eating; they don't need to say "Ally-all!" Blech. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy#post-2740567 Fri, 26 May 2017 07:23:23 +0000 wrkbrk 2740567@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mediagirl: Nothing major but they use made up words like ba ba for bottle. And I'm like why.....he's already a late talker! Why confuse him? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-things-do-your-parentsinlaws-say-in-front-of-kids-drive-you-crazy#post-2740565 Fri, 26 May 2017 07:15:33 +0000 littlebug 2740565@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My MIL constantly tells my son that he can't choose the pink one because pink is for girls. I constantly step in and say, "D, you can choose which ever one you want. Colors are for people." ETA: @TRAVELLINGBEE it makes me rage!</p> <p>My FIL and BILs can be pretty free with vaguely bigoted speech. My FIL once called our nephew a "sis" because he didn't want to eat something that is very Italian (and very bland) and therefore, apparently, very manly?! </p>