https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 03 Apr 2026 19:51:17 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-to-you-do-when#post-2591206 Sat, 23 Jul 2016 20:26:37 +0000 Astro Bee 2591206@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Banana330: Poor you! I'd rather deal with any screaming, but the head banging freaks me out a little. Though I actually jokes to DH, "oh well, there goes Harvard!"</p> <p>@MenagerieMama: We did try talking him through the transition today, and it could have been a total fluke, but we didn't have a tantrum either time. Now when I didn't turn his garden chair in the right direction, that caused a tantrum!!! </p> <p>@catomd00: He only bangs it a few times then stops, but if he kept it up, I'd definitely move him to safer place. </p> <p>@Miss Ariel: The longest tantrum has only lasted a few minutes. I guess I'll have to brace myself for the 15 mins tantrums, I guess... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-to-you-do-when#post-2590585 Fri, 22 Jul 2016 10:13:14 +0000 Banana330 2590585@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We have this problem too! same reaction too. I generally find a trade off works better... like you can't have that knife but you can have this spoon. Or I try and distract her with something else before taking the object and do it on the sly. other times I just brace myself and ignore the tantrum and start doing something else fun, she eventually stops and joins me. ugh 15 month olds </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-to-you-do-when#post-2590584 Fri, 22 Jul 2016 10:08:45 +0000 2PeasinaPod 2590584@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I also wait it out. I would completely ignore him until he was calming. Once he started to calm down, I would calmly walk over to him and explain to him that I understand he's frustrated, but that's not the way we act when we're frustrated. It gets easier as they get older to explain, but ignoring him was always my go to until he's calmed down. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-to-you-do-when#post-2590565 Fri, 22 Jul 2016 09:41:22 +0000 MenagerieMama 2590565@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>One thing that helped us was talk through the transition (taking something away) before doing it, even if it didn't seem like she understood. Saying "bye bye" to it and explaining when she would see it again. And what she would do instead. Of course didnt always work but cut down on tantrums a lot. And then validating her frustration and helping her with a coping skill (she likes to lay somewhere with her cheek on a hard surface or bite her lovey). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-to-you-do-when#post-2590563 Fri, 22 Jul 2016 09:38:18 +0000 Miss Ariel 2590563@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I normally leave her alone while she screams on the floor. I've learned that if I try to comfort her or touch her that just makes her madder so I'll wait it out. Although I wish they only lasted a minute there's times where it will seem to last 10 or 15 minutes. But eventually she will get tired of screaming and will normally want a hug. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-to-you-do-when#post-2590445 Fri, 22 Jul 2016 07:22:05 +0000 Jess1483 2590445@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For the head banging, although I don't really think it's a problem, I don't like it when LO does it, so I usually put my hand under his head and say "I won't let you hurt yourself," but otherwise don't stop the tantrum (empathizing, too). LO is only 13 months (so I don't really even consider them tantrums), so they only last 7 seconds. If it continued longer, I would probably move to the carpet or a bed or something. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-to-you-do-when#post-2590419 Fri, 22 Jul 2016 06:32:17 +0000 catomd00 2590419@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Astro Bee: I'd move him to a safe place - carpet/bed? Ultimately, if it hurts him he will figure it out and stop! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-to-you-do-when#post-2590414 Fri, 22 Jul 2016 06:13:10 +0000 Astro Bee 2590414@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@macintosh: @hilsy85: Ugh, yeah, half the time I say, "you're fine" or "you didn't want that," which I know I shouldn't say. He needs to learn to express how he's feeling, and being told he didn't want something that he clearly did can't be good.</p> <p>@catomd00: I'm less concerned about stopping the tantrum, and more with stopping him from banging his head on the hardwood floor. Any advice there? Or am I stuck with, that's how he tantrums? I will work harder to validate his feelings, in any case. I'm happy you've had success with your daughter. </p> <p>@Kemma: Thanks for the recommendation. I'll check her out. I'm really good about using a calm or neutral tone when he does this, and the tantrums are pretty short. I'll try offering him a choice and see if that helps. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-to-you-do-when#post-2590399 Fri, 22 Jul 2016 05:20:40 +0000 catomd00 2590399@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't usually try t stop the tantrum. I think it's a healthy and normal release of big emotions they don't have the ability to control yet. I sit by them and wait, offering validation of their feelings and let them know I'm there if they want a hug. When it's over, I again validate their feelings and explain why they can't do whatever it is that caused the tantrum. I've been doing this for well over a year with my 2.5 year old and she rarely tantrums now, never in public. The rare tantrum of hers lasts max 1 minute, and usually a hug ends it immediately. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-to-you-do-when#post-2590335 Thu, 21 Jul 2016 21:54:58 +0000 macintosh 2590335@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Kemma: I need to start working on this. I find myself saying "you're ok" or "you don't need that" all the time. I know he's just trying to communicate his feelings. I should try putting it into words for him cause he picks up a lot when I explain things. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-to-you-do-when#post-2590319 Thu, 21 Jul 2016 21:15:33 +0000 hilsy85 2590319@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Let him feel the feelings! Unhappiness, frustration, etc--these are all normal things for him to experience. I would let him experience them and comfort him when he is ready to let you. @Kemma: yes to all this </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-to-you-do-when#post-2590309 Thu, 21 Jul 2016 20:58:25 +0000 Kemma 2590309@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My guy is 16 months and I usually try to acknowledge and narrate his feelings ("that must be frustrating that Mum said no") then offer him another option or choice (an alternative rather than a straight distraction). I generally try not to give in but still support him so that he can learn about managing and expressing his feelings.</p> <p>You can't control his feelings or reaction but you can control yours by not taking it personally, remaining calm and not being frightened of him working out his feelings (not being afraid of a tantrum was a game changer for me!).</p> <p>You might also want to check out Janet Lansbury, she has some great blog posts and resources on age appropriate behaviour for toddlers. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-to-you-do-when#post-2590151 Thu, 21 Jul 2016 16:44:34 +0000 Astro Bee 2590151@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>... your young toddler tantrums? LO is 15 1/2 months old, and hates having things taken from him, whether it's toys, our water bottles, or car keys. When we do, which is frequent enough, he bursts into tears and either kneels down and hits his forehead off the floor, or lies down on his back and hits the back of his head on the floor. If he's not crying by then, he will always start crying. </p> <p>We don't want to encourage this behaviour. He does it at daycare, as well as home. He never cries when he trips up or falls, so we know he's not hurt, just expressing his displeasure. </p> <p>How should we be handling this? Usually I'll pick him up and do goofy things to distract him. Or start playing with him music books (Paw Patrol is a winner - he loves dancing to them). Is there something else I could do better? What is redirection? </p>