https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 19 Jun 2026 19:35:28 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/whats-the-babywise-spanking-christianity-connection#post-1912014 Thu, 23 Oct 2014 07:09:38 +0000 Tanjowen 1912014@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had no idea about the connection, and we are Presbyterian. I did find this interesting (not that Wiki is the best source ever):<br /> <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/On_Becoming_Baby_Wise" rel="nofollow">http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/On_Becoming_Baby_Wise</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/whats-the-babywise-spanking-christianity-connection#post-1911882 Wed, 22 Oct 2014 23:24:37 +0000 wonderstruck 1911882@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Skadi: An ad hominem attack? Really? I think you're taking it overly personally because you're pro-BW/pro-spanking. Your private life can totally discredit your professional life if the two are intertwined, as is the case here. It's been widely confirmed that they are estranged from their daughters. Not wanting parenting advice from someone who has no relationship with their children seems fairly logical to me. By the same token, if I was looking to buy a book about improving your marriage, I probably wouldn't choose one by an author who had been divorced multiple times. No, I don't know the details, but that person still isn't the kind of 'expert' I'm looking for.</p> <p>But really, none of that is on topic, because none of it answers OP's question. I believe @yoursilverlining: addressed that already though. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/whats-the-babywise-spanking-christianity-connection#post-1911876 Wed, 22 Oct 2014 23:04:48 +0000 Skadi 1911876@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Arden: But the fact remains that (to my knowledge) the claims are not substantiated outside the anti-BW camp. And there really is no way of knowing what the intimate relationships are truly like of public figures. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/whats-the-babywise-spanking-christianity-connection#post-1911844 Wed, 22 Oct 2014 22:13:25 +0000 Arden 1911844@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@blackbird: I agree. I think it's completely logical to assume early childhood affects adult behavior. </p> <p>No one would be commenting on the Ezzo's relationships with their children if they didn't set themselves up as parenting experts, especially "experts" that promote extremely controversial methods that are criticized by many pediatricians and psychologists. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/whats-the-babywise-spanking-christianity-connection#post-1911843 Wed, 22 Oct 2014 22:09:56 +0000 blackbird 1911843@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Arden: there is PLENTY of data to back this up re: early childhood affecting adulthood. It's a very critical development phase </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/whats-the-babywise-spanking-christianity-connection#post-1911812 Wed, 22 Oct 2014 21:39:57 +0000 Arden 1911812@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Skadi: I don't think it's a stretch at all to imply that early childhood can effect the future of that child. I prefer to take advice from people whose children are happy, healthy, well-functioning adults who have a good relationship with them - which is my long term goal (and far more important than having an easy child). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/whats-the-babywise-spanking-christianity-connection#post-1911796 Wed, 22 Oct 2014 21:19:25 +0000 Skadi 1911796@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Boheme: I'm sorry, but this is an ad hominem attack. It's rather a stretch to imply that their problems with their adult children stem from putting their babies on a schedule. Their private lives do not discredit their methods in the least and should not be a part of the discussion.</p> <p>I'm not just saying this because we did BW. I would hope that everyone would observe this courtesy with proponents of ideas they disagree with to keep the level of debate civil and on-topic. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/whats-the-babywise-spanking-christianity-connection#post-1911794 Wed, 22 Oct 2014 21:19:01 +0000 coopsmama 1911794@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Boheme: I grew up thinking Mike and Debi Pearl were a gift from God to parents! Ha!! They actually came to my childhood church and spoke over the course of a few nights. As an adult I am beyond horrified by many of their teachings. I am so grateful that my parents disciplined the way they felt lead (and yes, that included the occasional spanking) rather than trying to break our wills and spirits like the Pearls teach. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/whats-the-babywise-spanking-christianity-connection#post-1911790 Wed, 22 Oct 2014 21:16:46 +0000 coopsmama 1911790@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Skadi: Yes, as with anything in the Bible, there is always other interpretations that can be asserted as more accurate! As for us, the way I posted above is the way we feel convicted. :) This article is really good and if you scroll down it addresses the passage you brought up in a better way than I can: <a href="http://greenegem.wordpress.com/2010/10/30/spanking-and-proverbs-part-2-interpretations/" rel="nofollow">http://greenegem.wordpress.com/2010/10/30/spanking-and-proverbs-part-2-interpretations/</a></p> <p>@MrsSCB: I'm glad it resonated with you! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/whats-the-babywise-spanking-christianity-connection#post-1911781 Wed, 22 Oct 2014 21:10:19 +0000 Boheme 1911781@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@anandam: I'm always a bit mortified when people assume we follow the "To Train Up a Child" Michael Pearl model of parenting, or similar texts, because we are Christian and live in the South. There is a lot of stuff out there that hides behind the justification of Christianity for it's teachings, when in reality, they're anything but. Our church parenting groups focus on books like Grace Based Parenting. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/whats-the-babywise-spanking-christianity-connection#post-1911776 Wed, 22 Oct 2014 21:06:45 +0000 Boheme 1911776@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@yoursilverlining: I also think it's worth noting that their now-adult children are estranged from them. Parenting experts, eh? :wink: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/whats-the-babywise-spanking-christianity-connection#post-1911763 Wed, 22 Oct 2014 20:57:33 +0000 Skadi 1911763@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@coopsmama: That's a neat modern day interpretation, but I honestly think it's pretty unlikely that the ancient Hebrews--a Bronze Age society that regularly slaughtered, enslaved and/or raped surrounding tribes--did not spank their children.</p> <p>Also, they used the word "rod" to specifically talk about the parameters for beating slaves: <a href="http://www.religioustolerance.org/sla_bibl1.htm" rel="nofollow">http://www.religioustolerance.org/sla_bibl1.htm</a></p> <p>"And if a man smite his servant, or his maid, with a rod, and he die under his hand; he shall be surely punished. Notwithstanding, if he continue a day or two, he shall not be punished: for he is his money [property]." </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/whats-the-babywise-spanking-christianity-connection#post-1911749 Wed, 22 Oct 2014 20:49:20 +0000 MrsSCB 1911749@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@coopsmama: thank you for sharing your interpretation -- I know of those verses but I've never thought of it or heard it explained that way! I'm not personally religious, but I really like and appreciate the metaphor. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/whats-the-babywise-spanking-christianity-connection#post-1911714 Wed, 22 Oct 2014 20:32:14 +0000 coopsmama 1911714@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It was certainly marketed at first to Evangelicals but I wouldn't say all Christians parent the way the Ezzos teach. I'm a Christian and I certainly don't! </p> <p>As for spanking, yes, there is a Bible verse that says not to "spare the rod" but there is also another one (Psalm 23) that refers to God as a shepherd says "thy rod and staff, they comfort me." It is my understanding that the meaning of the word rod is the same in both of the scriptures. As such, my husband and I believe that the "spare the rod, spoil the child" passage is referring to the rod a shepherd would use to help keep his sheep from falling off of steep cliffs and to help corral them. A shepherd who was comforting his sheep and keeping them safe would never use a rod to beat his sheep, only to help safely keep them on the straight and narrow so to speak. In that same vein we believe instructing and guiding our children and creating boundaries for them is, in effect, using the "rod." </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/whats-the-babywise-spanking-christianity-connection#post-1911683 Wed, 22 Oct 2014 20:11:34 +0000 Weagle 1911683@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@yoursilverlining: Basically, this. After coming under fire from the public, they were rebranded to be not so tied to Christianity. I am a Christian, and not opposed to spanking, but I really despise the Eszos philosophy and "ministry." </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/whats-the-babywise-spanking-christianity-connection#post-1911675 Wed, 22 Oct 2014 20:08:09 +0000 birdofafeather 1911675@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>i didn't know there was a connection. we read and followed some babywise ideas but we don't spank. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/whats-the-babywise-spanking-christianity-connection#post-1911645 Wed, 22 Oct 2014 19:59:19 +0000 Skadi 1911645@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm guessing the Ezzos talk about spanking in their later books (Todlerwise, etc.) but I haven't read those, so I can't comment.</p> <p>For what it's worth, we're pro-spanking, pro-Babywise, and also atheist. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/whats-the-babywise-spanking-christianity-connection#post-1911636 Wed, 22 Oct 2014 19:55:13 +0000 yoursilverlining 1911636@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Well, I don't think it's a secret. The Babywise books were written by two Christians who founded a for-profit Christian organization and were originally explicitly aimed at Christians and marketed as Christian teachings, though secular versions are now published. </p> <p>The merits of the author's somewhat dubious biblical education aside, they are and were marketed as "Christian" parenting books within a fairly mainstream faction of Christians, especially evangelicals. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/whats-the-babywise-spanking-christianity-connection#post-1911619 Wed, 22 Oct 2014 19:39:03 +0000 Mrs. Sunshine 1911619@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Arden: I agree with you. Many scriptures get taken out of context or get twisted to mean what the reader would like it to mean. It's easy for confusion to get in when the bible is "open for interpretation". </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/whats-the-babywise-spanking-christianity-connection#post-1911618 Wed, 22 Oct 2014 19:38:26 +0000 Mrs. Oatmeal 1911618@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Not sure what the specific connection is, or if there is one! Honestly, out of my group of (Christian) friends, there's a pretty even split on those who spank/don't, CIO/don't, etc. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/whats-the-babywise-spanking-christianity-connection#post-1911615 Wed, 22 Oct 2014 19:37:27 +0000 Mrs. Sunshine 1911615@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think some says spanking is biblical. I don't have scripture &amp; verse (i totally should though) that says not to "spare the rod". Some take that literally, some take that to mean not to let your LO get away with things without consequences. I'm also a churchgoer &amp; have never heard the correlation between Christianity &amp; Baby wise before! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/whats-the-babywise-spanking-christianity-connection#post-1911614 Wed, 22 Oct 2014 19:35:56 +0000 Arden 1911614@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>:( I don't get it either. I think there's been some out of context reading that contributed to the culture. I don't really think it's biblical.</p> <p>I wouldn't attribute it to all of Christianity, it's mostly the more conservative, fundamentalist Christians who believe that way. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/whats-the-babywise-spanking-christianity-connection#post-1911612 Wed, 22 Oct 2014 19:33:21 +0000 anandam 1911612@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I hear Babywise scheduling and certain types of spanking mentioned on here as "Christian" sometimes. We're churchgoers but this apparently isn't a thing in our community so I'm curious if anyone wouldn't mind explaining?</p> <p>ETA: I know religion makes everything seem controversial, but please let's not make this an argument. :) </p>