https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 09 Apr 2026 21:07:46 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-are-they-no-longer-toddlers-and-when-do-they-grow-out-of-these-behaviors#post-2119617 Tue, 24 Mar 2015 10:16:32 +0000 brownie 2119617@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Cchoi4: find his motivation. Mine loves counting so he has a piggy bank and earns coins. Enough coins earns toys. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-are-they-no-longer-toddlers-and-when-do-they-grow-out-of-these-behaviors#post-2119608 Tue, 24 Mar 2015 10:14:18 +0000 Cchoi4 2119608@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>thanks ladies! Its good to know what other 3-4 year old are doing, especially boys too. My son is wonderfully funny and energetic..its just that I feel like we are CONSTANTLY reminding him to do this or to tell him to Stop that, and frankly, its annoying to me to hear myself so often! I wondered what others were going through at this age. </p> <p>@sandy: @honeybear: @brownie: @irene: thanks for the breakdown of your little ones. I'm going to try the use of a sticker chart and see if it helps. I tried that when we were potty training but perhaps he was too young to understand delayed reward. Perhaps now he will. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-are-they-no-longer-toddlers-and-when-do-they-grow-out-of-these-behaviors#post-2119433 Tue, 24 Mar 2015 08:49:11 +0000 jedeve 2119433@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My guys are still little, but I would say if you are worries, ask your ped about a referral to get an eval from a PT. Our PT has given us some stuff to look for with low muscle tone in the future and it sounds like some could be similar. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-are-they-no-longer-toddlers-and-when-do-they-grow-out-of-these-behaviors#post-2119415 Tue, 24 Mar 2015 08:44:01 +0000 looch 2119415@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My son does a lot of those things and we are going to get him evaluated by an OT, not because I think he's delayed, but he takes direction better from other people. Maybe that would be an option? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-are-they-no-longer-toddlers-and-when-do-they-grow-out-of-these-behaviors#post-2119406 Tue, 24 Mar 2015 08:39:50 +0000 sandy 2119406@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@lamariniere: he sounds like a lot like C (except the part about using utensils correctly :silly: ) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-are-they-no-longer-toddlers-and-when-do-they-grow-out-of-these-behaviors#post-2119393 Tue, 24 Mar 2015 08:37:31 +0000 sandy 2119393@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Cchoi4: while some kids magically grow out of "undesirable" behavior, some don't and need more help (gentle reminders, lots of reinforcement, etc). My approach to parenting is if something bothers me, try to tackle it early on bc it just becomes more ingrained as they get older. BUT, I think a lot of what you are talking about is typical/normal young child behavior. All kids are different - some kids are physically gifted and pick up on things, like bikes, super quick. Some kids are naturally great eaters and others aren't.</p> <p>Mouthing - If this really bothers you, I would talk to your pediatrician about it. My LO was a thumb sucker even in utero. We limited it to when she was sleeping by gently reminding her to take her finger out of her mouth when she was awake - she was able to understand this as early as 16 months. She was the kid who wanted to put every toy in her mouth. While this is ok at home maybe I didn't want her to be doing it at public play areas. So we did a LOT of reminding and she learned toys don't go in your mouth. </p> <p>Meal time - honestly I would talk to him about what good table manners are and the expectations are at the dining table. He's old enough to understand. Don't make it seem like you're mad but gently talk to him about how we sit nicely and eat our food, etc. I think it's so important to be consistent and to model good behavior. maybe you can do a reward chart. Or some people do the opposite, they start the day with a reward and bad behavior gets that taken away. Again, I think 4 is old enough to understand this concept. Again, I think it takes a lot of gentle reminders and consistency. </p> <p>Ive never let my LO get up and walk around during meal times so it's never been problem. She knows when we sit to eat that it's time to eat until she is excused. Others don't care as much about eating at the table (totally fine!) and let their kids graze and snack at meals or eat at the coffee table. And that's totally fine but as parents we set what's acceptable and expected. Like my LO had the habit of kicking her legs while eating and we had to remind her to stop and now she doesn't do it. </p> <p>In terms of feeding - I see kids that are 4 still using their hands to eat their meals. And my LO (she's 3 years 4 months) still uses her hands a lot. But if it bothers you, I would have gentle talks with him about it and do a lot of reminding and encouragement. Again, maybe he would benefit from a reward chart or something </p> <p>I think for the rest of what you are talking about - maybe reward charts for those too? With accidents, do reminders or set timers for him to go every 3-4 hours to avoid accidents. I think a lot of kids are so busy playing and wrapped up in what they are doing they put it off as long as possible. </p> <p>Clumsiness - I think this is normal but you can definitely talk to him about th concept of being careful when around xyz and do a lot of reminders. </p> <p>Whining - explain that it's not acceptable and model what is acceptable. We tell LO "no whining please. Please ask nicely" and when she was younger we modeled this by imitating her and saying "LO, when we want something do we say (insert whiny voice)? No we don't. We say (insert nice calm voice and polite request)". And she understood what was not an acceptable way to talk to us and what was acceptable</p> <p>I think this can be a frustraring age bc they seem so grown up in some ways but are still so little in others. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-are-they-no-longer-toddlers-and-when-do-they-grow-out-of-these-behaviors#post-2119136 Tue, 24 Mar 2015 06:04:12 +0000 lamariniere 2119136@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My son is 4, but he has been a relatively easy child since he turned 1. I think it's hard to compare kids because where they are a super star in one area, they are slower in another. </p> <p>Mouthing - He never put anything in his mouth, even as a baby.</p> <p>Eating - He's a slow eater but has been using utensils correctly for a long time. We don't really have the wiggle problem, but we are also really strict about everyone staying seated at the table.</p> <p>Accidents - He has been potty trained since he was 2.5, but still has an occasional accident (had one yesterday at school). Also, I still ask him 20 times a day if he needs to pee because I can tell that he does!</p> <p>Brushing teeth - One of us always brushes his teeth thoroughly, but then we also let him spend a little time brushing his teeth on his own. He brushes his teeth willingly (he's obsessed with his pink princess tooth brush), but I don't think he's capable of doing a good job on his own yet.</p> <p>Clumsiness - It happens, but in general he's pretty careful.</p> <p>Not listening: He's a pretty good listener, but I think it's also because he's generally an easy child. Usually if we reason with him, we can avoid crisis mode. There are still meltdowns, of course, but he has never been one to have tantrums.</p> <p>Scooter/bike - He has a pedal bike but it doesn't get much use. He has a new micro maxi scooter and is really at ease on it. But we bought him the micro scooter when he was about 18 months, so he's had a lot of time to practice. DS was always a little bit slower to do things like climb playground equipment or jump fearlessly off of the couch. But I think part of that is his cautious nature. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-are-they-no-longer-toddlers-and-when-do-they-grow-out-of-these-behaviors#post-2119129 Tue, 24 Mar 2015 06:00:49 +0000 blackbird 2119129@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My friend's 4 year old exhibited some of this behavior when we were on vacation a few weeks ago. 4 year olds still act pretty darn toddler like, to me (the mom of a 2 year old). I think 4 year olds are just sort of at a really difficult, high energy age....which I came to realize after she was talking to me about him. I had no idea, frankly. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-are-they-no-longer-toddlers-and-when-do-they-grow-out-of-these-behaviors#post-2119118 Tue, 24 Mar 2015 05:26:39 +0000 honeybear 2119118@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>What you describe sounds normal to me. LO is approaching 5, and he doesn't mouth stuff (but I've always been ruthless about taking non-food items and fingers out of his mouth), or have accidents, but everything else on your list still shows up at least once and a while. </p> <p>Food: He takes forever to eat a meal and will sometimes claim he "can't" feed it to himself. We don't usually help except maybe to cut something up, but sometimes I'll fork food and help him out simply to avoid the preschooler equivalent of a 3 martini lunch. </p> <p>Brushing teeth: I let him practice a bit, but I read somewhere that they're not really ready to do it solo until around 6. He has always had a clean bill of health from the dentist and I'm not about to jeopardize that, so I'll be handling the toothbrush for a while yet! We have the same light saber toothbrush mentioned above. I sing the Star Wars theme song and Darth Vader's theme while we brush. John Williams is a genius. ;)</p> <p>Clumsiness: Yes. Water gets knocked over. He's learned how to get a towel to clean it up. </p> <p>Not listening: Ha. I'm fairly certain I've got a typical kid in this regard and the not listening factor racheted up by like a factor of 10 this past year. The best strategy for me is to simply not engage in the inevitable arguments and try to remain as calm as possible. </p> <p>Tricycle: He can ride one, but we don't have a balance bike or regular bike. I'm not terribly concerned about bike-riding. It's not like it's impossible to learn later on if you don't perfect your technique at age 4/5, and I think the gross-motor skills at play can be replicated by a number of other activities. Also, as much as I would love to use bikes as local transportation, I regard most of the other drivers on the road as imminent threats to life and limb (because they ARE and they need to slow down and pay attention to the *!#&amp;(ing road), so he's not going to use one for transportation unless all of my neighbors suddenly decide to forsake their gas-guzzling SUVs and bike the mile to the grocery store. Walking is better exercise anyhow! :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-are-they-no-longer-toddlers-and-when-do-they-grow-out-of-these-behaviors#post-2119086 Tue, 24 Mar 2015 00:24:43 +0000 brownie 2119086@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have an almost 4 year old as well and yes some of these things are so annoying.</p> <p>Mouthing - Never been an issue for my son but his best friend still puts EVERYTHING in her mouth. To the point that we all have poison control on speed dial. </p> <p>Accidents - We just got past this but expect to deal with it again soon. It seems to come and go.</p> <p>Brushing teeth - We just bought him a star wars toothbrush that looks like a lightsaber and makes noise for 1 minute. He will occasionally brush his own teeth. Then we go over it again.</p> <p>Clumsiness - Ugh this is the worst. He doesn't notice anything around him. I am constantly "reminding" him not to kick my stomache, my computer, play with the cord.</p> <p>Balance Bike - This isn't an issue for us (we had to spend $$$$ for a pedal bike for him he was too good on the balance bike). But my son has speech and play issues. So there is always something.</p> <p>For us, it is the WHINING. Whining and crying for everything. Ugh. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-are-they-no-longer-toddlers-and-when-do-they-grow-out-of-these-behaviors#post-2119084 Tue, 24 Mar 2015 00:04:11 +0000 irene 2119084@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hugs ! I have no suggestions but this is what my son does so you can compare. He's 3 years 2 months:</p> <p>Mouthing: While he doesn't suck his thumb, I can not cut his habit of sucking on his blankie at night. We have been trying to cut that since he was 2! Grrr! He doesn't suck on things during daytime though but he would still do that if he naps at home.</p> <p>Accidents: I hear ya, we are still in the "accidents here and there" stage and I agree with everything you said..</p> <p>Brushing teeth: OK we went to our dentist and they recommend the adults brushing the kids' teeth until they are 7 or 8! So even though they were brushing you have to help them finish regardless, sorry you are not off the hook :)</p> <p>Won't sit still / use utensis, Clumpsiness / ignoring / not listening: Yeah, same boat</p> <p>Balance Bike: We bought a balance bike for his 3 year birthday and he is getting a hang of it! We just make it fun. Let me know if you want suggestions! But also this highly depends on personality....</p> <p>Hugs mama!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-are-they-no-longer-toddlers-and-when-do-they-grow-out-of-these-behaviors#post-2118999 Mon, 23 Mar 2015 21:19:46 +0000 Cchoi4 2118999@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>What do you consider to be no longer toddler age? My son is almost 4 (in April). He continues to exhibit behavior that I feel he should have grown out of by now (or has not learned skills that I feel he should have by now?) ...such as:</p> <p>-MOUTHING. He continues to suck his thumb (we've been trying to break the habit since it began at 9 months). Not only that, he puts various toys, paper, chews on my shirts (when i'm wearing them!), etc...just to have something in his mouth. And this is about 50% of the time - basically whenever he isn't running around or playing with toys.</p> <p>-WON'T SIT STILL WHILE EATING/WON'T FEED HIMSELF WITH UTENSIL We continue to have to remind him to sit straight/forward and not get out of his seat until he is finished with his meal. He is so fidgety and often times gets out of his chair after taking one or two bites :( He also whines for me to feed him, otherwise, he won't eat nearly as much! (meanwhile, my 20 month old is feeding himself!)</p> <p>-ACCIDENTS. :( We started potty training him in May 2014! I thought we had it in the bag. He was doing so well in the first few months and on...with just a few accidents here and there. I thought those were normal. But now that I look back, he has accidents because he doesn't realize he needs enough time to get to a toilet/potty and doesn't allot himself that time. He continues to do this even now and even at home when his potty is literally in the next room. We remind him that he needs to go when he has "that feeling" even just a little bit but it doesn't seem to be sinking in...</p> <p>BRUSHING TEETH. When were you able to let your child brush their own teeth (well)? It takes an enormous amount of asking him to even go to the bathroom to start. Then when he is there, he just putzes around...playing with the toothbrush instead of actually brushing. He gets toothpaste on his clothes too.</p> <p>CLUMSY BEHAVIOR...liking knocking water glasses over during meals.</p> <p>IGNORING REQUESTS/COMMANDS. *sigh* he does this a lot. I have to repeat myself 5x's and then threaten him before he complies with anything. We battle so much over putting on pajamas, brushing teeth, putting on socks (he still cries when he can't put his socks on), shoes on, coat on, etc etc.</p> <p>ABILITY TO RIDE A TRICYCLE/balance bike/scooter. *SIGH* again. We have older boy cousins who have handed down a balance bike and a tricycle. I know its not good to compare but one boy was riding his balance bike at 2.5. I see neighborhood kids who look like they are 2.5-3 years old cruising by us on their scooters. My son gets frustrated and then gives up before we are even at the end of the block. </p> <p>I'm trying to gauge whether my son has delays or whether this is all normal behavior for his age. He's always been a bit on the difficult side (i.e. doing exactly the opposite of what you ask him to do.) but I can't tell whether he's just "spirited" and will get it when he's ready or whether there is something I should be looking into.</p> <p>Thoughts? </p>