https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 16 Apr 2026 15:02:12 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/3#post-2126796 Mon, 30 Mar 2015 11:37:50 +0000 WinterBee 2126796@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Anagram: No, it wouldn't bother me. But, I think it depends on the relationship with the people saying it.<br /> For ex. an over-bearing MIL who constantly criticizes and acts possessively... yes, it would bother me.<br /> A healthy open relationship with MIL who affectionately refers to their grandbaby as their baby... no, I would think it was cute and it wouldn't bother me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/3#post-2111104 Tue, 17 Mar 2015 07:02:15 +0000 irene 2111104@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I can't say. I know it is irrational to be bothered by that, but in reality I think I will be annoyed if someone calls LO "my baby". Unless that someone is a close relative related by blood (ie. not just a babysitter/nanny), someone that I personally like, and are consistently in my LO's life 24/7 and helping me take great care of him. (which that person doesn't exist other than husband) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/3#post-2111097 Tue, 17 Mar 2015 06:51:09 +0000 Dandelion 2111097@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It bothers me, but I'm possessive over my kids and I realize that.</p> <p>What really bugs me is MIL taking credit for things they accomplish. She does it with my dogs, too. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/3#post-2111060 Tue, 17 Mar 2015 04:38:12 +0000 Charm54 2111060@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Not at all, I find it sweet! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/3#post-2111019 Tue, 17 Mar 2015 00:27:37 +0000 AprilFool 2111019@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>What bothers me about it is I start to feel a bit like a second class citizen when it comes from the grandparents because technically 'my baby' is me or DH but I do understand the place it is coming from and gave up being actually annoyed by it a long time ago. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/3#post-2110998 Mon, 16 Mar 2015 23:28:20 +0000 littlejoy 2110998@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I believe that it takes a village ... If someone embraces my babe, I think it's amazing. When my parents and ILs say it, I find it really sweet. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/2#post-2110997 Mon, 16 Mar 2015 23:26:55 +0000 marionberry 2110997@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>On occasion, but more so because the people who say that do take credit for everything - saying this or that was inherited from them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/2#post-2110995 Mon, 16 Mar 2015 23:26:08 +0000 HLK208 2110995@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It doesn't bother me...unless the person saying it bothers me :silly: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/2#post-2110993 Mon, 16 Mar 2015 23:19:41 +0000 Ra 2110993@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nope. It's a term of endearment. It's not like they are literally laying claim to my child. I don't get why people get upset over this. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/2#post-2110992 Mon, 16 Mar 2015 23:16:47 +0000 wonderstruck 2110992@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@travellingbee: I'm sorry, it did come out like I was specifically responding to you although I didn't quite mean it that way. Bad day (really bad - having to go say goodbye to my grandma and now sitting around waiting for the phone call ) bad, and I overreacted. It bugged me but shouldn't have bugged me that much, I'm sorry I overreacted. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/2#post-2110942 Mon, 16 Mar 2015 21:32:13 +0000 daniellemybelle 2110942@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Not at all. I find it sweet. She is their baby, too. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/2#post-2110775 Mon, 16 Mar 2015 17:23:02 +0000 lemondrop 2110775@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Not at all. I'm happy our family loves them so much. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/2#post-2110763 Mon, 16 Mar 2015 17:13:09 +0000 ElbieKay 2110763@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>The only person who bugs me in this way is my husband's annoying friend. Let's call her Sally for this purpose. When she came to visit us, she kept calling herself "Aunt Sally". Since we are not blood relatives and she makes my skin crawl, I really did not appreciate her assuming that level of intimacy with my child. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/2#post-2110745 Mon, 16 Mar 2015 16:53:36 +0000 travellingbee 2110745@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@wonderstruck: I would never be okay with someone telling me how to parent my child, so the problem there for me wouldn't be the phrase "my baby", but the fact that they were trying to tell me how to parent.</p> <p>I'm sorry if you felt that my comment meant to imply that you didn't want people to love your child. That was not my intention. Noone in my life has used that expression as anything other than a loving term and I'm very committed to the idea of building a village for my child therefore I don't feel like it bothers me. Your child is yours to raise and you have every right to like or dislike how anyone interacts with them. I never meant to imply otherwise. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/2#post-2110728 Mon, 16 Mar 2015 16:43:04 +0000 Mrs.Pinecone316 2110728@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think this would only bother me if that specific person in general just annoyed me. If it was someone I loved and got a long with I would think its sweet. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/2#post-2110721 Mon, 16 Mar 2015 16:38:12 +0000 jedeve 2110721@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@wonderstruck: yes this exactly!</p> <p>I think it's fine if it's a turn of phrase that bothers people. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/2#post-2110716 Mon, 16 Mar 2015 16:35:59 +0000 DillonLion 2110716@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I get "How's our baby?" a lot, but it does not bother me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/2#post-2110715 Mon, 16 Mar 2015 16:33:46 +0000 sunny 2110715@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Rubies: LOL. Exactly this. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/2#post-2110682 Mon, 16 Mar 2015 16:00:59 +0000 plantains 2110682@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@wonderstruck: that seems mean and kind of rude, sorry people have said that to you. People always think they know how best to parent the kids of others, so strange. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/2#post-2110676 Mon, 16 Mar 2015 15:50:17 +0000 Rainbow Sprinkles 2110676@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom says it sometimes but it doesn't bother me. I know she means well, and she's not saying my daughter is more hers than mine. She just loves her! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/2#post-2110664 Mon, 16 Mar 2015 15:38:22 +0000 Cherrybee 2110664@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It doesn't bother me in the slightest now but when I was pregnant it gave me rage (like the 28 Days Later, I'm going to eat your brains kinda rage). </p> <p>@loki: I think it's partly hormones. I could have happily buried my (really rather wonderful) MIL under the patio when I was pregnant because I was convinced she was going to try to steal my baby! </p> <p>@blackbird: @Smurfette: THIS X 1 million! My mum never calls LO "her baby" but the situation is the same. She rarely sees E and, when she does, she wont be left alone with her never mind actually look after her. She never changed her nappy, not once, and yet on FB and to her work friends she plays the super-doting-grandma role. She begs me to send pictures to her (when she lives 2 miles away - come and see her!) and she used to tag herself in my FB pictures. I put a stop to the tagging eventually, even though I knew it was petty but...... YOU WEREN'T THERE! Gah! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/2#post-2110588 Mon, 16 Mar 2015 14:49:59 +0000 wonderstruck 2110588@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@TravelBee: I think this pretty much pin points why it bothers me - everyone I know who has used this phrase has at least once used it to dismiss my role as the parent and say something like, "My baby needs some solids!" after I've said he's too young, or, "Give me my baby, I bet he'll calm down for me!" when he's upset and I'm comforting him.</p> <p>ETA: and I completely disagree with the notion I keep seeing implied that if I don't want someone calling my child their baby, that must mean I don't want him to be attached to others and hsve a loving relationship with them. More love is always better, but I'm still the one who went through hypermesis gravidarum, gestational diabetes, two c-sections, stretch marks, bloody nipples, and months of sleeplessness for them! So yes, I think I have earned the right to be picky about other people using a possessive term with my child if I don't like it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/2#post-2110586 Mon, 16 Mar 2015 14:48:50 +0000 Jess1483 2110586@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents often say "my boy" or "our boy," which doesn't bother me at all. I think if they actually said "my baby," it might get to me a bit. And it would probably bother me if the ILs did it, too (only because the in-laws do seem to have a sense that there's some ownership there--like, they'll say "my grandson," as if that means more than "your son..".) But they don't. It would definitely depend on the person. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/2#post-2110584 Mon, 16 Mar 2015 14:47:42 +0000 Tanjowen 2110584@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents call LO, "their bubby," which doesn't bother me at all. My in-laws haven't ever called him "their" anything and it would probably weird me out because it isn't their nature to really use terms of endearment for anyone. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/2#post-2110582 Mon, 16 Mar 2015 14:43:10 +0000 travellingbee 2110582@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@plantains: No I'm the same way. I loved for people to hold him. I love that he's attached to his teachers. I love that he adores my parents. I encourage him to be more attached to my in-laws. I figure the more people that love and support him the better! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/2#post-2110580 Mon, 16 Mar 2015 14:42:43 +0000 jedeve 2110580@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Totally bothers me. </p> <p>I get along with my ILs great but it bugs me. I birthed them, I'm raising them. Yes you get to swoop in and be Grandma aka favoritepersonever - don't rub it in! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/2#post-2110563 Mon, 16 Mar 2015 14:29:50 +0000 jhd 2110563@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It really does bother me and I'm not sure why. It just does. I feel like I should before grateful they love him so much, but it really annoys me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/2#post-2110524 Mon, 16 Mar 2015 14:04:51 +0000 simplyfelicity 2110524@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This is really interesting! To be honest, I have called my niece (now 6 years old) "my baby" but I think it's more of a reflection of our close bond and the fact that my sister and I are best friends. I don't imagine, for a second, that I have any rights, possession or clout when it comes to her. She's just "my baby bear" and always will be. It's just a term of endearment for a little girl I love to pieces. If that makes me creepy or whatever, that's fine with me. :silly: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/2#post-2110511 Mon, 16 Mar 2015 13:57:57 +0000 Mae 2110511@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Not really. The only person who it annoys me when he says it is my FIL but thats probably just a "bitch eating crackers" situation. :) I have no issue if my mom or MIL or whoever says it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-family-calls-your-baby-my-baby/page/2#post-2110459 Mon, 16 Mar 2015 13:23:01 +0000 plantains 2110459@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't care about stuff like that. To be honest, I love it when people give LO that feeling of familiarity and belonging. We live pretty far away from family and I want her to have the biggest village possible. There can be no doubt n anyone's mind that he kid is physically mine, but if she belongs in the hearts of others, then that is a fantastic feeling. </p> <p>Then again, I was perfectly happy for lots of other people to hold her during my mat leave and I have friends who hated that so maybe I am just weird. </p>