https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sat, 16 May 2026 05:40:51 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-to-retire-a-family-name#post-1845677 Tue, 02 Sep 2014 15:12:11 +0000 MrsKoala 1845677@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wouldn't use it. I think that when you use a family name, you should do so in honor of someone who was important to you within your family. So if no one that you really loved had that name, I don't really see a reason to continue with it especially given its history. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-to-retire-a-family-name#post-1845595 Tue, 02 Sep 2014 14:11:36 +0000 Mrs. Detour 1845595@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thank goodness it's not something as recognizable as Adolf. I seriously doubt there is any risk of playground teasing on the connotations--definite teasing potential because it's unusual today, but there are good nickname options. I like the idea of going with initials or nickname to keep the connection without going for the full name. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-to-retire-a-family-name#post-1845481 Tue, 02 Sep 2014 13:19:09 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 1845481@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>As a person whose family names are not original to my ancestors' birthplace (or at least the ones I self-identify with) I would use the name. Granted I would have to like the name, but negative association would not prevent me from using it. I wish I knew the names of my great greats before they shipped to America. The naming scenario you described sounds like tradition and not specifically honoring your ancestors that exploited others. </p> <p>In the case of Adolf Hitler, I doubt his full name would be passed down from generation to generation by cousins and distant kin. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-to-retire-a-family-name#post-1845446 Tue, 02 Sep 2014 13:02:29 +0000 lizzywiz 1845446@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>First, if you don't want to use it, don't let anyone convince you otherwise.<br /> But, if you do...are there any alternatives, so you don't have to make an 'either or' decision? Like using the initials as a first or middle name. I know someone named A.J. Matthew Brown and the A.J. stands for Adolfo J-something ( I forget) in deference to a family name. Or using a foreign equivalent or something with the same root (Francine vs. Francesca, etc).</p> <p>I would have loved to have such a rich historical connection to my name, so I would lean towards keeping it, but I understand your concern. People are going to google the name for all different reasons (dating, job prospects, whatever) and that would stink if the name has such a bad connotation....but maybe people would just assume it is the same name but no relation? Just a coincidence? </p> <p>Tough one. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-to-retire-a-family-name#post-1845418 Tue, 02 Sep 2014 12:56:08 +0000 loki 1845418@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MaryM: i just lol'd at adolf hitler. i mean, not that he's a funny guy but imagining that's the family name and she's the first one considering not using it! ha!</p> <p>if i didn't like the name on it's own i might not want to use it. but that history is pretty incredible so i would have to really dislike it. i don't think the namesakes would make me not use it if i really liked it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-to-retire-a-family-name#post-1845414 Tue, 02 Sep 2014 12:55:44 +0000 Mrs. Detour 1845414@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thanks ladies. It's along the lines of Andrew Jackson or Christopher Columbus in terms of bad history. </p> <p>One of the women who currently has it uses it as a starting point in her work for racial justice. She sees it as owning the history and acknowledging the family's particular responsibility to make things better. That approach seems right to me. </p> <p>I'm not sure that I love the name (DH does) but I have only recently confronted the idea that maybe this name isn't what we'll use so I haven't fallen in love with another name yet. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-to-retire-a-family-name#post-1845385 Tue, 02 Sep 2014 12:45:15 +0000 Mrs. Pickle 1845385@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If it's important to you to use it then I wouldn't worry about the history. </p> <p>If don't like it then don't worry about breaking tradition. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-to-retire-a-family-name#post-1845373 Tue, 02 Sep 2014 12:42:43 +0000 loveisstrange 1845373@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If it's a name you love, use it. If not, don't.</p> <p>DHs family has a family name that I really dislike, so we're not going to use it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-to-retire-a-family-name#post-1845357 Tue, 02 Sep 2014 12:37:35 +0000 MaryM 1845357@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had a common name growing up, so I was never really bothered by historical names and/or their connotations. </p> <p>But, I mean, if the name was Adolf Hitler or something like that, I'm pretty sure I'd stop using it. </p> <p>But do the not good people outweigh the numerous good ones in your instance? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-to-retire-a-family-name#post-1845351 Tue, 02 Sep 2014 12:35:46 +0000 JerricaBenton 1845351@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Interesting issue! I won't lie and say I don't want to know so I can Google too lol! If it were me, I'd probably use it because it seems like it'd be so neat to have a name that goes so far back in history, but if it has connotations that really bother you or you would feel like you have to explain away, then I'd probably ditch it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-to-retire-a-family-name#post-1845348 Tue, 02 Sep 2014 12:34:28 +0000 blackbird 1845348@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>if you don't like it, don't use it. the end. Don't worry about it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-to-retire-a-family-name#post-1845324 Tue, 02 Sep 2014 12:29:05 +0000 lamariniere 1845324@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've never felt obligated to use a family name. If you are ready to retire it for any reason, even for something as simple as just not liking it, I don't see why not. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-to-retire-a-family-name#post-1845308 Tue, 02 Sep 2014 12:24:02 +0000 Mrs. Detour 1845308@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We have a family name that has been in continuous use since the early 17th century and some really cool records tracing it all the way back. Still, we're hesitating about giving the name (probably as a middle name) to our LO since some of its prior owners committed atrocities in the British colonies and especially the American South. There are also good people with the name, but it's uncommon these days, and naturally a google search turns up more sordid history than good history. There is so much history that it feels weird to unilaterally cut LO out, especially since we believe in being honest about some of these legacies. That said, the most prominent individuals with then name are definitely not worthy of commemoration. What would you do? </p>