https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sat, 20 Jun 2026 03:41:48 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-was-so-comfortable-watching-both-kids#post-2549571 Mon, 16 May 2016 10:11:25 +0000 snowjewelz 2549571@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH is gonna have to when my maternity leave ends! DD currently only goes to daycare 3 half days a week and we can't afford more hours. I can't imagine my mom being there allllll the time either, so he's gonna have to figure it out. Man, I'm starting to feel bad for him. I need to let him have some fun this summer! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-was-so-comfortable-watching-both-kids#post-2549566 Mon, 16 May 2016 10:05:23 +0000 lamariniere 2549566@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My husband could do it from day one, BUT I EBF both kids, so it was hard to get away. With my first, I had a VERY hard time leaving my baby even for an hour, so DH could have done it, but I didn't give him very many opportunities. When the second one came along, it was much easier to leave them early on. The second baby was also so much easier and didn't need to BF every hour on the hour. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-was-so-comfortable-watching-both-kids#post-2549559 Mon, 16 May 2016 09:59:04 +0000 Bluebonnet 2549559@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Corduroy: I can understand why you are frustrated. It sounds like you have a lot on your plate and you really need a break.</p> <p>Why is your DH so uncomfortable watching both kids? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-was-so-comfortable-watching-both-kids#post-2549531 Mon, 16 May 2016 09:22:46 +0000 mamabolt 2549531@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>LO2 is six weeks and he's only been alone with him once, let alone both kids! Not sure when he'll try but I do it every day so I really want him to suck it up! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-was-so-comfortable-watching-both-kids#post-2549508 Mon, 16 May 2016 08:58:45 +0000 T.H.O.U. 2549508@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Truth Bombs: I agree, if you have 2 kids, you should be able to watch them both. If I had to step out (like for an appointment) DH would have done it, but for things like grocery shopping, sometimes it was easier to just go as a family and have both sets of hands there if needed. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-was-so-comfortable-watching-both-kids#post-2549505 Mon, 16 May 2016 08:51:24 +0000 littlebug 2549505@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>A was about 5 weeks when I spent the day at the spa with my mom and sister. He had to spend the morning alone with them and get them into the car, then took them over to his parents' house for Easter dinner. It was only a couple of hours where he was truly on his own, but he did really well and it helped him feel more comfortable with it. When I went back to work when A was 12 weeks old, I had to work that weekend. Saturday he had his mom come over to help, but he had them both all day Sunday by himself. I think he does better with the 2 alone than I do! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-was-so-comfortable-watching-both-kids#post-2549467 Mon, 16 May 2016 08:21:20 +0000 mrs.shinerbock 2549467@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Another thought - could you bring in reinforcements? Sometimes DH will ask his BF to bring his kid over or I will plan an outing with my sister and BIL brings their kids over. DH still has to manage both LOs, but sometimes just having another adult around helps. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-was-so-comfortable-watching-both-kids#post-2549414 Mon, 16 May 2016 05:59:45 +0000 MrsSRS 2549414@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <br /><p><i>This comment has been deleted by the original poster.</i></p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-was-so-comfortable-watching-both-kids#post-2549413 Mon, 16 May 2016 05:54:45 +0000 MrsSRS 2549413@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DD is 11 months amd DH still isn't comfortable with two. He has a hard time partially because she really never took a bottle like DS did. But now she's fine with solids and water so just yesterday I told him it was time to freaking let that one go and realize that she's firmly past the infant needs Mommy stage. I've been basically pushing him into situations where he's set up for success because I know from experience that the best way to get him comfortable is for him to realize he's already doing it and succeeding. So he takes the kids to the gym by himself once a week (then they hang in the nursery while he works out) and that got him better at getting them in and out of the car. At first I had to help get them ready and buckled but now he can do it. That set the precedent for me getting some time alone and felt manageable to him. I sent them to a favorite playground yesterday so I could get some work done and they were totally fine for two hours. Baby steps. And patience. (And some conversations about sucking it up and learning to deal.) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-was-so-comfortable-watching-both-kids#post-2549408 Mon, 16 May 2016 05:03:18 +0000 travellingbee 2549408@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think we both find it stressful- mostly because DS1 (3years old) demands a lot of attention. So the. If the baby starts getting fussy DH gets frazzled. But he will watch them both when needed. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-was-so-comfortable-watching-both-kids#post-2549407 Mon, 16 May 2016 05:01:15 +0000 NavyRN2012 2549407@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Day 1. He's been a SAHD since before we had our second. I also agree with above posters that he is a parent to 2, so refusing to watch them both is ridiculous. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-was-so-comfortable-watching-both-kids#post-2549403 Mon, 16 May 2016 02:51:11 +0000 Cherrybee 2549403@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH was fine from day 1 but me not so much. I do it because I *have* to but if I still find it very stressful. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-was-so-comfortable-watching-both-kids#post-2549377 Sun, 15 May 2016 22:33:47 +0000 mrs.shinerbock 2549377@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I voted early infancy because it took both of us a few weeks to be comfortable, but DH would have done it from Day 1 if we had needed to. I agree with @Truth Bombs: if you are a parent to 2 kids, then it's not really an option to refuse to watch both at the same time, but since your SO is, here are a couple things that I try to do to make DH's life easier when I am leaving him with both kids.</p> <p>Try to schedule the outing for a time when one or both kids will be napping or, at minimum, try not to do them during the crazy parts of the day. Nap time if good for us because LO1 still naps 1-2 hrs most days. Meal times might be good too, since LO2 would be contained and LO1 would be eating at the table. I also tend to do things after the kids go to bed, so I will plan to meet friends at 8:30pm. DH is also a lot more lax about screen time than I am, so if he needs to distract LO1, he will just give her a phone.</p> <p>I also try to set him up for success, by making sure that bottles, snacks, meals, etc are prepped, the diaper bag is packed if they are going somewhere, and maybe a new toy or activity to keep LO1 occupied. DH often takes them to the park because he can contain both in the stroller to walk there, then LO2 stays in the stroller or is in the baby swing and LO1 is free to run around. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-was-so-comfortable-watching-both-kids#post-2549376 Sun, 15 May 2016 22:22:41 +0000 Foodnerd81 2549376@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm a sahm and my kids are 2.5 years and almost 5 months and some days I still don't feel ok with both kids. :bummed: But sh has watched them both alone a number of times. For us it's really hard because the baby hates taking bottles, which we are working on, but it means that if I'm gone longer than a feeding he's basically got a melt down from her. </p> <p>That doesn't sound fair to you at all. Yeah getting used to taking care of two kids is hard and scary, but he has two kids. Deal with it! Most of the time he's just watching them in our home, it's not like he's taking them to Disney world or something. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-was-so-comfortable-watching-both-kids#post-2549375 Sun, 15 May 2016 22:14:52 +0000 Truth Bombs 2549375@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>From day 1. And I had an easier time leaving LO2 than I did LO1 so I took him up on it whenever I needed to. For Mother's Day I went away and left him alone with both kids overnight (LO1 is 3.5 and LO2 is 5 months) and they all did great. Though my husband's eyes sure were blood shot at brunch the next morning from the baby keeping him up at night 😂</p> <p>In my opinion, if you are a parent to 2 kids, "refusing" to watch 2 kids isn't actually an option. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-was-so-comfortable-watching-both-kids#post-2549364 Sun, 15 May 2016 21:41:20 +0000 T.H.O.U. 2549364@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I voted 9-12 months. It was just hard even with a three year old that was independent (and understood waiting). Once the baby was mobile and bottle fed I did short trips out alone. But it went both ways, he also didn't get a lot of time alone leaving me with both kids either. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-was-so-comfortable-watching-both-kids#post-2549359 Sun, 15 May 2016 21:37:25 +0000 pastemoo 2549359@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Corduroy: Hopefully soon!!! He will be SAHD this summer. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-was-so-comfortable-watching-both-kids#post-2549355 Sun, 15 May 2016 21:30:26 +0000 Corduroy 2549355@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH had a rough adjustment to baby #2 since it meant he had to be a lot more involved with LO1. LO2 is 11 months and it's still a Herculean effort to get him to watch the two kids. I'm getting fed up. </p> <p>There's other stress in my life at the moment (layoffs and a unplanned job hunt) so I'm probably being too hard on him. But I really need a break and him refusing to watch two kids means I almost never get a break (LO2 took his first crib nap in 3 months today, so almost never whereas it had been never). Is this typical? Is there anything that helped your SO jump in (besides baby #3)? </p>