https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 23 Apr 2026 06:29:18 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-you-amp-your-so-disagree-on-parenting-who-wins#post-598991 Thu, 28 Feb 2013 06:44:28 +0000 heffalump 598991@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I usually win, since I'm home with lo all day and have to deal with her. But I don't mind being flexible with her schedule, she's usually fine with it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-you-amp-your-so-disagree-on-parenting-who-wins#post-598852 Wed, 27 Feb 2013 23:16:30 +0000 MrsStar 598852@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I tend to take the lead so dh usually just follows what I do - if he wants to do something in particular and has a semi-good argument for doing it then I'll let him, I'm pretty laid-back about everything though. Only time I stand my ground really is if lo isn't in a good mood but that hardly happens. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-you-amp-your-so-disagree-on-parenting-who-wins#post-598808 Wed, 27 Feb 2013 22:43:43 +0000 mrsjazz 598808@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee: @apis: Good to get the dad perspective. I felt bad about the whole situation so I came up with a compromise for me to bring LO to his job on one of my days off. I can't deny him the opportunity to flaunt his offspring :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-you-amp-your-so-disagree-on-parenting-who-wins#post-598799 Wed, 27 Feb 2013 22:38:04 +0000 apis 598799@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I usually defer to DW on most matters because she is at home with LO and so understands his schedule and rhythms better than I do, but on occasions when I feel very strongly about an issue--say, going outside in certain weather or taking him out too much when he will be tired--we have the debate, and whoever has the best argument gets to decide.</p> <p>I'm very happy that DW takes my opinion seriously, and she knows that I respect how much she does for LO (and me) so that during the few disagreements we have about the little man, we know we're arriving at our positions out of concern for him, which is something we obviously both share. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-you-amp-your-so-disagree-on-parenting-who-wins#post-598136 Wed, 27 Feb 2013 17:21:52 +0000 mrbee 598136@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We usually defer to the person who has to deal with the consequences, just like you! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-you-amp-your-so-disagree-on-parenting-who-wins#post-598038 Wed, 27 Feb 2013 16:44:01 +0000 runsyellowlites 598038@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrsjazz: Well we're a blended family so I think it's probably me. DH is great with DS but I still struggle with that over-protectiveness some and tend to step in/question more than DH does.</p> <p>For something like your specific issue, we'd probably agree for the get go that it was too late to have P out.... then again we both take part in bedtime routine since DH bathes her and I dress/nurse her. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-you-amp-your-so-disagree-on-parenting-who-wins#post-598030 Wed, 27 Feb 2013 16:40:57 +0000 Arden 598030@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We're very methodical. Our baby isn't here quite yet, but when we disagree on decisions for the future we try to bring it back to our previously agreed-upon principles and overall methodology of how we've chosen to parent, and then decide what fits in better to that standard. It usually works so far! :P </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-you-amp-your-so-disagree-on-parenting-who-wins#post-598018 Wed, 27 Feb 2013 16:37:46 +0000 mrsjazz 598018@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@TurtleDoves: I love that they want to show off the babies, though! At first DH said, "I'll deal with bedtime for the next few days" and then he took it back :)</p> <p>@runsyellowlites: Is there one of you who usually ends up digressing more? DH seems to be that person and even though all the decisions were in the best interest of LO, I feel bad that he often has to come around to my side. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-you-amp-your-so-disagree-on-parenting-who-wins#post-598002 Wed, 27 Feb 2013 16:33:59 +0000 runsyellowlites 598002@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We discuss till we come to an agreement whether that be one of us digressing completely or compromising. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-you-amp-your-so-disagree-on-parenting-who-wins#post-597963 Wed, 27 Feb 2013 16:27:41 +0000 CupQuakeWalk 597963@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It depends on what it is...we don't disagree much, small things like your example.<br /> I would win this one for the reasons you stated: you do bedtime and you will have to deal with it when her schedule is all messed up.</p> <p>Basically I win most of them because it is me who knows our son's schedule inside &amp; out and I am very particular about naps, bedtime and feeding times. DH respects it but I actually remember having a bit of a fight when he wanted to take LO to his office (trophy baby). It wasn't a scheduling issue at the time but a convenience issue because back then LO was EBF and if LO went out for 2 hours, guess who would have to be dragged along? Meal on wheels: ME. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/when-you-amp-your-so-disagree-on-parenting-who-wins#post-597953 Wed, 27 Feb 2013 16:23:54 +0000 mrsjazz 597953@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH wanted to take our LO to an event at his school tonight. Many of his co-workers have not met her and he wants to show her off (proud daddy!) However, this would mean that they would be home between 8:30 &amp; 9 p.m. I try to have LO in bed at 8 (8:30 the latest). She would also need to eat dinner during that time.</p> <p>We went back and forth and I won because I'm the one that does bedtime, if she's out that means it's going to take longer to fall asleep, which then will mean her napping tomorrow with the nanny would be messed up. I feel like the bad guy but I'm thinking about her and he's thinking about showing her off like a trophy! Geez.</p> <p>DH rarely takes into account her schedule (on days I have to work late LO is usually up and way behind schedule because DH never sticks to it...and then she takes forever to go to bed!) and feels like I'm being too strict.</p> <p>If you and your significant other disagree on something, does someone usually win? Who is it? Or do you keep discussing until you can come to some kind of agreement/truce? </p>