https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sat, 04 Apr 2026 03:05:52 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2/page/2#post-2300884 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 12:56:26 +0000 meredithNYC 2300884@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For me, 0-1 was a nightmare - enough so that I didn't dream of TTC until LO was 2 years old and I had adapted a bit. Initially I found 1-2 pretty tough also, but I'm a SAHM and had to deal with both kids without a break. Now that my oldest is in preschool and the youngest is older (5 months), I can honestly say that it's fairly easy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2/page/2#post-2300829 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 12:23:16 +0000 erinbaderin 2300829@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@JoJoGirl: This is a good point - my parents always say that if they'd had my brother first they wouldn't have had a second baby. He would only sleep if and while somebody patted his back. Eventually in desperation they used to pat him to sleep and then put a heavy pillow on him so he'd think they were still there. The 80s! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2/page/2#post-2300760 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 11:44:45 +0000 Mommy Finger 2300760@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@travellingbee: Yes! Exactly this. I thought 0-1 was tough and I had a relatively easy baby. DH is struggling a bit with the transition from 1-2 b/c he needs to do a lot more. Before, I would just do the majority of it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2/page/2#post-2300757 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 11:41:55 +0000 Corduroy 2300757@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>0-1 was way harder for me. </p> <p>DH has found 1-2 harder or maybe just as hard. He took over almost all of LO1s wake up and nighttime routines. I don't think either of us realized how much I was doing for her. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2/page/2#post-2300705 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 10:42:27 +0000 cascademom 2300705@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@JoJoGirl: The sleep deprivation the second time around is more bearable. It's still not easy, but easier to bear. Also, you have to be on your game because of a toddler who needs you too.</p> <p>ETA: The first was the hardest. From 0-1 for us. LO #1 was colicky, didn't sleep well, etc. Second baby so far had a honeymoon 3 months until recently. Right now, we're managing some separation anxiety and sleep issues at 4 months. We're moving soon, so both boys will have their own bedroom and some other positive changes are happening. LO #2 rolls with the punches, but is getting a big stubborn these days. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2/page/2#post-2300670 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 10:15:45 +0000 hellobeeboston 2300670@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@JoJoGirl: yeah, this scares me. LO #1 was a really good baby now that I think back.... i hope the same goes for #2. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2#post-2300667 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 10:14:46 +0000 SleepyMonkey 2300667@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>0 to 1 was so much harder because i had no idea what i was getting myself into and i mourned the loss of the life that i had. That adjustment was brutal. 1 to 2 is easy peasy...and my 2nd is not a good sleeper while my 1st was and i still think its way way easier. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2#post-2300642 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 09:56:13 +0000 JoJoGirl 2300642@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I guess the nature of the babies probably impacts it too. I cannot even IMAGINE having an easygoing LO1 and a colicky/high-needs LO2. I guess maybe I should feel grateful for a horrible LO1 so really, everything will seem easy in comparison with LO2. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2#post-2300638 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 09:51:53 +0000 Mama Bird 2300638@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Ginabean3: hi! I'm sorry you're dealing with that too. Same here - DS was such an easy baby compared to DD, and she's so high needs! Poor DS is getting the short end of the stick - I was planning to pull him out of day care for a couple of days by now and do fun stuff together, but I can't put DD down or get her to sleep, so it's not happening. So for us the 1-2 transition was way worse despite having more experience with babies. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2#post-2300625 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 09:40:00 +0000 Adira 2300625@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>0-1 was ROUGH. And I had an easy baby and it was still soooo hard! Everything felt enormously more challenging!</p> <p>1-2 was a breeze in comparison! The sleep deprivation doesn't hit you NEARLY as hard and you already know what you're doing with a newborn, so everything just feels so much easier. You're just BUSIER because you have two to take care of, but difficulty-wise, it's not bad at all! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2#post-2300623 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 09:38:57 +0000 travellingbee 2300623@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have heard from many couples that 0-1 was harder for mom and 1-2 was harder for dad. Not sure why but maybe it's because more responsibility starts to fall on dad now because mom is with the baby. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2#post-2300608 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 09:29:03 +0000 californiadreams 2300608@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@tinyperson: so exciting! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2#post-2300605 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 09:28:25 +0000 tinyperson 2300605@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@californiadreams: @oliviaoblivia: Thanks :) heading to family dr. tomorrow morning for a blood test, but the million tests I've taken say positive! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2#post-2300599 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 09:25:18 +0000 Ginabean3 2300599@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>1-2 for sure. My first was the easiest baby ever.....slept when required, ate well, great attitude. We could take her everywhere and anywhere and everyone always complimented us on her good nature! My second on the other hand is a super high needs baby who needs to be held all the time, cries all the time, doesn't sleep, etc, etc. Combine that with my now crazy 2.5 year old....oy....life is challenging sometimes!😳 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2#post-2300594 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 09:23:05 +0000 rattles 2300594@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>0-1 was a million times harder for me. I trusted myself a lot more the second time and was generally more skilled as a mother. We were already used to the lifestyle changes that came with our first and had a wider network of parent friends. Plus, my second baby was SO much easier than my first! I think expectations had something to do with it too. I'm one of five, and my mom had always said 1-2 was her hardest transition, so I expected it to be really hard. I was pleasantly surprised! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2#post-2300587 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 09:21:37 +0000 ShootingStar 2300587@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No experience yet myself, but when I was pregnant a guy at work with 4(!) kids said nothing was as hard as 0-1. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2#post-2300575 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 09:16:52 +0000 oliviaoblivia 2300575@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@tinyperson: what?! Congrats!!!</p> <p>0-1 was harder, but not that bad. 1-2 was a cinch. Worried about 2-3 though. Three under three is no joke. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2#post-2300572 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 09:14:10 +0000 californiadreams 2300572@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@tinyperson: what?! how random i opened this thread and saw this!! congratulations!!!</p> <p>@JoJoGirl: my #2 is not here yet, but i feel like it won't be as hard as #1. When you go from 0-1, your whole life changes, in big and little ways that you could never expect or anticipate. I feel like adding another will be tough in many ways, but it won't be a total shock and uproot to my whole life as I know it - if that makes sense. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2#post-2300548 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 09:03:07 +0000 chopsuey 2300548@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>0-1 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2#post-2300546 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 09:02:29 +0000 erinbaderin 2300546@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This is making me feel better! I'm 15 weeks pregnant with #2 and have been having all these same thoughts - we've got a good routine down, everybody gets to sleep through the night, my son is getting to the age where he'll entertain himself for a half hour as long as we're in the room...what am I thinking rocking the boat? But I had the same thoughts when I got pregnant with #1 (even though I'd spent 5 years trying to do just that) and he's been the best decision I ever made, so hopefully this will turn out as well. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2#post-2300544 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 09:01:22 +0000 Smurfette 2300544@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@JoJoGirl: It is very encouraging! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2#post-2300527 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 08:54:49 +0000 JoJoGirl 2300527@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Okay well this is encouraging! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2#post-2300518 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 08:51:45 +0000 blackbird 2300518@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@JoJoGirl: sleep deprivation has been weirdly NBD, like @Mamasig: said. I'm still sort of surprised I don't feel like total utter shit all day, every day, even when T gets up all the damn time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2#post-2300508 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 08:48:04 +0000 Amelieisme 2300508@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>That first kid rocks your world. The second is a much easier transition. You have experience on your side and you've already adjusted your life to include a child (few dinners out, etc). I'd say having 2 is more of a slow burn not the life-changing hit by a truck kind of thing that baby number 1 is. Does that make you feel better or worse? 😉 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2#post-2300504 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 08:47:11 +0000 Mamasig 2300504@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@JoJoGirl: I found my body reacted to the sleep deprivation way better the second time. It wasn't as big a shock. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2#post-2300499 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 08:45:28 +0000 SeptMomma12 2300499@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My first was a lot like yours - horrible colic, screamed 24/7 for the first 3 months - so 0 to 1 was an awful transition. We wondered what we had done to ourselves for months:( My second is 4 months now and she's an angel baby - just goes with the flow and literally never cries. So 1 to 2 has been a pretty easy transition. Not to say there aren't difficult days, but after the horrible transition from 0 to 1, this one has been a joy! And it certainly helps in the hard moments to see the love between DS and DD - they adore each other :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2#post-2300498 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 08:45:25 +0000 Mamasig 2300498@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@BandDmommy: right there with you! I'll have 3 under 4 for a few months but my second two will have a 2 year age gap. My husband works a shift schedule so it's often just me at night. I worry but I know we'll make it through. My mom is going to move in with us (not because of #3 but to help her out) so at least I'll have another adult in the house. But honestly most times the kids just want me at night. </p> <p>@JoJoGirl: going from 0-1 was hard! Going from 1-2 was a breeze compared to that. Neither one of my kids was hard really. It's just such a shock to your system at 1st. You've been through it all before and know that it will pass. And seeing your kids together is the best thing ever! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2#post-2300496 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 08:44:36 +0000 JoJoGirl 2300496@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrsjyw: @BandDmommy: Thanks. &lt;3 </p> <p>We'll actually have MORE help this time around because we've since moved into a bigger house with a guest room, so my mom will likely be visiting a lot more. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2#post-2300495 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 08:44:23 +0000 MamaBehr 2300495@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I found 0 to 1 was hardest, but 1 to 2 was surprisingly difficult (I know, not what you wanted to hear), BUT 2 to 3 was EASY. Like, hardly noticeable. The biggest trick to 1 to 2 is learning how to split your attention and knowing that sometimes someone might have to cry. However, with a 4 year age gap I would imagine you'll have a MUCH easier time than I did (mine are all about 23 months apart) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/which-was-harder-0-gt1-or-1-gt2#post-2300480 Thu, 24 Sep 2015 08:36:37 +0000 mrsjyw 2300480@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@JoJoGirl: ds1 sttn at an early age and they're 2.5 years apart! I thought I'd be hit with the deprivation and honestly it hasn't been bad. I've done night duty alone since ds2's birth and I've been more productive and energized because my body is already used to surviving on less sleep! Ds2 is turning out to be a pretty chill sleeper too so in that regard I know I am super super lucky, but in general the short increments of sleep haven't worn on me like the first time. And back then dh had a longer leave and did some of the motn wakes and my mom would come over to do motn wake ups too sometimes to give me a break! </p>