https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 22 Apr 2026 00:57:54 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed/page/2#post-1937932 Mon, 10 Nov 2014 15:33:19 +0000 NurseDMB 1937932@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I only breastfed my son for the 4 days we were in the hospital (csection). </p> <p>He dropped over 10% of his body weight and had jaundice, and I was freaked that he wasn't getting anything. He also had a hard time latching, even with the nipple shield. I kept telling the LC's that it hurt, and they kept telling me it shouldn't hurt but never really helped me.</p> <p>I leaked minimal amounts of colostrum but I really suspect I would have had low supply because my boobs didn't even hurt or leak once I stopped nursing him.</p> <p>I also had PPD and breastfeeding gave me major anxiety. Once I switched him to formula, I felt such a sense of relief.</p> <p>I will try again with baby #2, but I won't beat myself up if it doesn't work out again. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed/page/2#post-1936658 Sun, 09 Nov 2014 13:44:04 +0000 BabyTsMom 1936658@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Pumpkin Pie: I guess it's because it doesn't necessarily teach baby how to latch on? Like a crutch. But for me, without the shield, my LO would never have learned. It's not difficult but they suck because they don't stay on very well sometimes and you have to clean them after each use (I ended up just buying a bunch and rotating them, which helped especially in MOTN when I was nursing 2-3x a night at first)....<br /> If you want to try it out, I can send you a couple of unused ones. Not sure of your size, but I think mine is 24mm. They're still in packaging- they're not cheap ($10 or so each). I'm not using them so I'd be happy to give them to you. Just private wall me with your info :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed/page/2#post-1936365 Sun, 09 Nov 2014 03:37:39 +0000 Pumpkin Pie 1936365@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@babtsmom do you know why they are frowned upon? What about using the shield sucks? Is it difficult? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed/page/2#post-1936342 Sun, 09 Nov 2014 00:06:17 +0000 yoursilverlining 1936342@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I decided to formula feed because it was the best choice for my baby and myself.</p> <p>It allowed an incredible less-stress option for bonding, a real bonding opportunity during feeding for DH and grandparents, and was convenient. </p> <p>YOU are part of the equation. YOU and your mental and physical health are important. Breast milk is not magical unicorn tears and formula is not devil milk. Formula is engineered to meet your child's nutritional needs. Your healthy mental health meets your child's needs. You should feel NO guilt about your choice. As long as your baby is full of either breast milk or formula, you're making the right choice. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed/page/2#post-1936341 Sat, 08 Nov 2014 23:57:25 +0000 chibee 1936341@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>i made a post just like this when i was debating switching from BF to formula! Mine ended up in the NICU for meconium aspiration for 7 days where they gave him formula, so i was paranoid when he came home that i wasn't making enough milk (i was) and supplemented anyway, and i was still stressed and paranoid about how much he was getting even though he was gaining great but the stress just got to me. Plus he had bad reflux and would fuss a lot while nursing and i started to dread feeding and obsessing over it hourly. His ped suggested he might have a milk allergy so i eliminated basically everything from my diet and it was extremely hard. The next visit she suggested alimentum since his reflux wasn't getting much better plus he had a persistent skin rash she suspected was allergy-related. I took that opportunity to completely switch and he's been on formula since 8 weeks. I'm glad i stuck it out for 8 weeks and i am way less stressed out, i don't ever dread feeding, and i know exactly how much he is getting, which was what the issue was for me. I couldn't trust my body to do what it needed to do, sadly, but that's my personal issue. and he's still gaining weight great, i can now eat what i want (although that sounds a bit selfish) and his reflux is so much better! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed#post-1936338 Sat, 08 Nov 2014 23:45:13 +0000 BabyTsMom 1936338@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Pumpkin Pie: i struggled so much to have my LO latch in the early days. I saw two LCs in the hospital, because he refused to latch AND he rejected the bottle (had to syringe feed for a couple of weeks...another story...). neither LC suggested a nipple shield to me, but thankfully a nurse did. It was the only way I got my LO to nurse in the early days, due to his teeny mouth and poor latch. I later learned that nipple shields are frowned upon by LCs, so that could explain why it was not suggested to you,too? I'd try it out if you're still interested in making it work. The shield sucks but it worked for me, and I was able to wean LO off by 8-9 weeks old.... Good luck to you! I also wanted to say that nursing has not really given me that magical bond to my LO either. I Guess I've bonded to him but I think bottle feeding may have also allowed me to bond with him in the same way? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed#post-1936336 Sat, 08 Nov 2014 23:42:57 +0000 Pumpkin Pie 1936336@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thanks for the link @kemma. My supply isn't great but it's more than she is taking. I've done a weighted feeding and she only takes about half what I would normally pump. I don't know. I might just continue what I'm doing and call it quits when I've had enough. LO also just falls asleep on the breast. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed#post-1936322 Sat, 08 Nov 2014 23:02:01 +0000 Kemma 1936322@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Pumpkin Pie: How do you feel your supply is now? Still low or do you think you're dealing with a milk transfer issue? Have you done any weighted feeds with your LC?</p> <p>I'm not sure if you've ever checked out the La Leche website but they have the most amazing forums, they can generally offer you quite specific advice or suggest helpful resources in your area - here's the link for the newborn forum: </p> <p><a href="http://forums.llli.org/forumdisplay.php?111-Breastfeeding-Your-Newborn-(0-3-months)" rel="nofollow">http://forums.llli.org/forumdisplay.php?111-Breastfeeding-Your-Newborn-(0-3-months)</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed#post-1936306 Sat, 08 Nov 2014 21:54:44 +0000 erinpye 1936306@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm so sorry, I know it's so stressful. I know we were very apprehensive about revising our first LO's ties, but it did help. Also- delay in milk coming in is another sign of problematic tie issues. I will say, my youngest LO is 9 months and it is a night and day difference- she's not tied, and I never cracked and bled, she didn't colic like my first, she goes longer between feedings, and I actually have plenty of milk this time, when the first time I had dried up by now.</p> <p>It might be worth looking into. It's also 100% ok to say, "hey, I tried, enough, formula time." Don't feel guilt about any decision- feeding your baby and being happy is the right decision, no matter how you do that. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed#post-1936301 Sat, 08 Nov 2014 21:39:39 +0000 Pumpkin Pie 1936301@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ok, I didn't want to bore you with a long story, but here is my breastfeeding journey:</p> <p>I had a difficult labor, spiked a fever, and the baby was in the special care unit after delivery. The LCs told me my milk would come in soon, so I just kept nursing. By the time we left the hospital, my milk hadnt come in, and the baby was starting to look yellow, so we started giving her formula at the hospital and continued to do so. My milk did not come in until after a week, so we were formula feeding the whole time. As soon as my milk came in, I started nursing, but was in so much pain that I saw a LC, still no improvement, so I saw a different LC. Slight improvement, but not much, so I saw another LC. They all said my nipples were great, my baby had a great suck, and just keep doing it and it should all be fine. I asked about the tongue/lip tie and they said my LO had a slight tongue/lip tie, but that it shouldnt get in the way of BFing, and one of them said she was pretty liberal about diagnosing them. Another LC said getting them cut might improve the BFing, but she didnt really sound confident in that statement. My supply was also really low, so the whole time I had to supplement with formula. I started taking fenugreek and pumping with a hospital grade pump to try to build up my supply. So, thats where I am. My supply has gotten better, but the breastfeeding has not. My nipples feel sore when I nurse because my LO has a shallow latch. My milk flow is really slow (at least it looks really slow to me). It is so frustrating. I guess I can also look into using a nipple shield. None of the LCs suggested it though. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed#post-1936250 Sat, 08 Nov 2014 20:44:40 +0000 Kemma 1936250@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Pumpkin Pie: I'll be honest and say that my LO is two and has struggled with a bad / lazy latch all the way through but we got to a point where I was dealing more with discomfort rather than pain and we would occasionally get that fabulous can't-feel-a-thing latch.</p> <p>Is there a particular reason you're needing to pump as well as nurse? Are you still trying to build supply? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed#post-1936220 Sat, 08 Nov 2014 19:55:51 +0000 erinpye 1936220@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Pumpkin Pie: I know a medical professional told you a lip tie shouldn't get in the way of breastfeeding, but that's antiquated information. Current knowledge states that not only does a lip tie affect breastfeeding, it is nearly always associated with a posterior tongue tie. If you have cracked and bleeding nipples, pain, and a shallow latch, those are all signs your baby has a structural issue. My first DD did, and it was missed repeatedly by various pediatricians and LCs. It wasn't until I came across some research on my own, when my 5 month old baby flat out refused to nurse for an entire day and I was desperate, that I figured out what it was. I found a specialist and got her diagnosed and got her ties revised with laser. I can't tell you what a different baby she was, and how different breastfeeding was from then on. Sadly, because her issues weren't resolved for so long, my supply was just hit too hard due to lack of proper nipple stimulation while she nursed, that by 8.5 months I dried up, and switched to formula. If you're curious for some resources about tongue and lip ties, both of these doctors, one is an ENT and one is a Dentist, are wonderful and have great articles and blog posts on their websites explaining the whole thing:</p> <p>Dr. Kotlow: <a href="http://www.kiddsteeth.com" rel="nofollow">http://www.kiddsteeth.com</a><br /> Dr. Ghaheri: <a href="http://www.drghaheri.com" rel="nofollow">http://www.drghaheri.com</a></p> <p>Best of luck with whatever you decide, and know that no matter how your baby eats, your LO will be just fine. :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed#post-1936214 Sat, 08 Nov 2014 19:42:32 +0000 avivoca 1936214@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Pumpkin Pie: I'm 13 months postpartum and sometimes my nips still feel like that. it's usually when a tooth comes in or she's in a growth spurt and nursing more. Every 2-3 hours is about normal for pumping, especially if you will be pumping at work. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed#post-1936200 Sat, 08 Nov 2014 19:12:29 +0000 Pumpkin Pie 1936200@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>What should breastfeeding feel like? I wouldn't say it's painful the way it was in the beginning when I had cracked nipples. But it feels sensitive, maybe perhaps sore. I'm also pumping like every 2-3 hours so maybe there's too much stimulation? Is there such a thing? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed#post-1936162 Sat, 08 Nov 2014 18:08:10 +0000 Applesandbananas 1936162@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Pumpkin Pie: I had a LC encourage me to use formula if that would make me happy. That's what matters! LO loves you so much, regardless of whether it's breast milk or formula. Bottle-feeding can be very bonding as well, just ask my husband! He LOVED bottle-feeding LO. </p> <p>Whatever you decide will be the best for your LO because LO will be loved and fed. &lt;3 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed#post-1936152 Sat, 08 Nov 2014 17:55:34 +0000 BabyTsMom 1936152@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Pumpkin Pie: I started supplementing about 3 weeks ago because I ran out of frozen breastmilk to give LO during work days. Nowadays, I have the caregivers mix breastmilk and formula on days that I work, and on days that I'm home I will supplement him with 2-3oz formula per feeding (my supply took an unexplained dip around the same time that I ran out of frozen bm). I think we'll be done nursing in about a month or two. No guilt here. I can certainly relate to your mixed feelings but try to remember that feeding your LO should not be stressful for you (or painful), and at the end of the day, if he's fed (formula), loved, and happy then who cares if you give him formula?? Plus others can feed your LO too!<br /> ETA: LO is 5.5 months old </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed#post-1936010 Sat, 08 Nov 2014 14:44:49 +0000 avivoca 1936010@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Pumpkin Pie: Will you be able to pump at work?</p> <p>I did not formula feed, but if at any point Bf wasn't working out, I would have switched. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed#post-1935993 Sat, 08 Nov 2014 14:22:12 +0000 reverie 1935993@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It was really hard for me to stop for all the reasons you mentioned, but it was super hard when I was on maternity leave and impossible when I went back to work. I had low supply -- baby nursed on and off all day (and I mean all day, literally sitting in front of the TV for 12 hours and never sleeping for more than 1.5 hours without needing to be fed until 6+ weeks). When I went back to work I only pumped 1/4th of what he needed during the day and was going crazy to make that 6 ounces so I let it go and life has been amazing every since! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed#post-1935986 Sat, 08 Nov 2014 14:12:02 +0000 Pumpkin Pie 1935986@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>The other thing is I won't be able to breastfeed once I go back to work in a couple months so is it worth it to continue trying? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed#post-1935967 Sat, 08 Nov 2014 13:49:11 +0000 Cherrybee 1935967@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I formula fed because I didn't make any milk. BUT I will probably breastfeed my next baby by choice..... I'm going to try breastfeeding again but if its painful or difficult or the least bit stressful I will be whipping out the bottles straight away. I wasted too much of E's infancy crying over my boobs. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed#post-1935961 Sat, 08 Nov 2014 13:41:59 +0000 Jess1483 1935961@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Pumpkin Pie: I had the same issues (just not a big enough mouth from LO). I ended up using a nipple shield after a super awful fissure formed on one of my breasts. I used it for 1-2 months (what a pain!) and then magically one day didn't need it anymore. At that point BFing became enjoyable and I really liked it (if 2 month PP me heard that, she'd cut me…)</p> <p>That is not to say that you have to stick it out. Honestly, I EBF until LO was 19 months (though we were down to one feed/day at 13 months), but looking back, I almost regret how hard it was to BF for the first 3-4 months. I wonder if I'd been a happier mom if I'd been willing to formula feed/at least supplement. Don't get me wrong, I'm proud that we were able to BF for so long, but I regret the pressure that I put on myself during that time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed#post-1935939 Sat, 08 Nov 2014 13:13:04 +0000 daniellemybelle 1935939@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Pediatricians and even LCs can be wrong about the severity of lip ties. I would get a second opinion. By 7 weeks you shouldn't be in pain!</p> <p>It took almost 6 months to enjoy nursing &amp; for LO to stop preferring the bottle. Now nursing is an incredible bond we have and I am so glad we stuck it out, even though we supplemented with formula the whole time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed#post-1935923 Sat, 08 Nov 2014 12:43:40 +0000 Pumpkin Pie 1935923@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thank you all for sharing. I never thought I'd get so emotional about feeding my baby so I appreciate your support. I don't know what it is that I keep having such guilt. While I don't currently enjoy breastfeeding, I do want to breastfeed because of all the benefits, convenience, and bonding. I'm still working through it all. </p> <p>@Jetsa - my baby doesnt open her mouth big enough. The LC just kept telling me to try different positions, using tons of pillows to prop myself up, not feeding her until she opens wide, etc. But, she just doesnt open wide enough. I hope she gets better. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed#post-1935749 Sat, 08 Nov 2014 09:04:49 +0000 meredithNYC 1935749@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had a very low supply and a raging case of PPD - not a good combination. After 2.5 months of bf'ing as much as I could and supplementing for the rest, I decided enough was enough (and yes, this was after my LC even said it just wasn't working out due to my supply issues). I wanted to enjoy being a mother and I decided that the "breast is best" brigade could suck it.</p> <p>There are going to be people who question your decision to quit whether that's at 7 weeks or 17 months, so try not to let them stand in the way of your decision. Because at the end of the day, it is you who are responsible for feeding your baby and others do not know your personal struggles. I remember people would often say things to me like, "Oh yeah, it's normal to be breastfeeding 18 hours a day when you have a newborn" and I just thought to myself - sure, maybe it is normal. But maybe that is not best for my mental health, which in turn is not good for my baby.</p> <p>So, good luck no matter what you do! I hope you find lots of support for formula or breast feeding both in real life and online. I know the early days are tough, but hang in there - it gets so much better. Cliche, I know, but SO true! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed#post-1935728 Sat, 08 Nov 2014 08:39:51 +0000 Applesandbananas 1935728@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My LO is 20m and will nurse for an hour if I let him. You aren't doing anything wrong! Some babies just love to snuggle up with mama and comfort nurse! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed#post-1935706 Sat, 08 Nov 2014 07:57:45 +0000 jetsa 1935706@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Pumpkin Pie: we had a lip tie checked at 10 weeks and I was so hopeful it would be the thing that changed everything. The ENT said the same thing your dr said, yes it was there no he wouldn't correct it. I really think babies like that just need time for their mouths to get bigger I think that's why it got better for us at 4 months.</p> <p>ETA: you are absolutely not doing anything wrong. The times they give are all averages. At that age DS would eat for 30 mins each side and never pop off on his own and then he'd be satusified for maybe an hour and we'd begin the process again. My advice is to do what you want I only made it through because I am incredibley stubborn but it ended up being worth it to me in the end. I hate the statement that it'll never hurt bc it does and it continues to for a long time. I had LC's act like I was just a wimp umm no I gave birth wo pain meds this just fricking hurts! Also he was almost 4 months before it started being 'easy' and I truly believe it's bc his latch finally got big enough and he was a pretty big newborn (8-3). I stuck with it because Breast is best and I believe that but I'm pregnant with no 2 now and I don't know that I'll be as insistent if it's not easier this time! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed#post-1935672 Sat, 08 Nov 2014 06:08:49 +0000 Charm54 1935672@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Even though the LCs said she was getting enough she ended up in the NICU for 10 days with severe dehydration and jaundice. Right then and there I put my foot down and said enough. I followed their ridiculous BFing/supplementing/pumping cycle (which took 1.5 hours) for a week after that until I broke down in a hormonal mess and my husband encouraged me to quit. </p> <p>I ended up EPing (mostly for cost savings) and supplementing with formula. By 6 months I stopped pumping and switched to formula exclusively. I think "breast is best" is vastly overgeneralized. The biggest factor in me giving up BFing was because I hated every second of it. I did not enjoy it, it was not bonding, I felt tied down to my baby and hated being her only food source. Life got so much better in my house when we started bottle feeding and dh could give feedings on a regular basis.</p> <p>For me, the stress and hellish months weren't worth it to maybe get to a blissful time. I know for some women who really really really want to BF, they're willing to put up with a lot to fulfill that goal but I just wasn't. </p> <p>Good luck - looking back it seems like it was an easy decision because my daughter is happy and healthy and I have no qualms about FFing her at all - but I know at the time I really struggled. FWIW I will happily 100% be bottle feeding LO2 from day 1, no question.</p> <p>Also I agree with @loveisstrange: ... Fearless Formula Feeder is a fantastic resource that really helped me come to peace (and even celebration) with my decision to bottle feed.</p> <p>You're a good mom no matter how your baby gets fed. :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed#post-1935657 Sat, 08 Nov 2014 03:03:22 +0000 Kemma 1935657@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I believe you need to do what's going to be best for your emotional and mental health (whether that be formula, mixed or breast feeding) and you have absolutely no need to feel guilty for making the decision that works for your family!</p> <p>Having said all that, is there anything you think we might be able to help you with in regards to the bf'ing? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed#post-1935649 Sat, 08 Nov 2014 01:46:32 +0000 loveisstrange 1935649@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>To put it very simply.... in the end, my daughter and my mental health were more important than breastfeeding. Period.</p> <p>"Breast is best" is in no way a true statement for everyone.</p> <p>If you haven't yet, I'd check out the website and Facebook page for Fearless Formula Feeder. Also, her book Bottled Up. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/why-did-you-decide-to-formula-feed#post-1935591 Fri, 07 Nov 2014 23:24:21 +0000 Mamasig 1935591@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>With DS1, I was so stressed because he lost too much weight in the hospital so I was very anxious about how much he ate. I only lasted two weeks breastfeeding. Honestly, I don't think he got the hang of it and therefore I didn't produce enough. I felt like he was always eating and I was totally overwhelmed. I switched to formula and it worked out great. </p> <p>With DS2, I lasted a week. It hurt so much. I couldn't handle the bloody nipples and pain. I did not look forward to feeding him. It wasn't worth it to me. I switched to formula and have not looked back. </p> <p>Honestly, I did not enjoy breastfeeding at all. It did not make me feel more bonded to my boys. For me, it was just added stress. I don't think breast is best if mama is miserable. </p>