https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sat, 11 Apr 2026 00:21:45 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-choose-which-friends-your-lo-can-be-friends-with#post-71694 Thu, 09 Feb 2012 19:28:25 +0000 eeh 71694@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wouldn't tell my kids they CAN'T be friends with someone because that almost always backfires. I'm more likely to teach my kids about what a true, good friend looks like when they're young and haven't really started making friends yet and then offer to host things with the friends so I can get to know them. If there's something I'm concerned about I will voice that to my kids and explain why I think that friend isn't the best influence. I will then encourage my kids to be nice to that person but perhaps invite someone else instead. If I really, truly don't like the kid I will probably come up with a lot of reasons why my kid can't go over to there house though because I can't supervise. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-choose-which-friends-your-lo-can-be-friends-with#post-71593 Thu, 09 Feb 2012 18:08:09 +0000 heffalump 71593@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't think you can pick your LO's friends. I feel like if I were strict, LO just wouldn't tell me about her friends. I don't want her keeping things from me. </p> <p>My mom liked knowing my friends, but she made our house very kid friendly so the kids would want to hang out there, and therefore she knew my friends. She always had tons of food for us and would ask me if I wanted to have parties. But she never forced me to bring people over. I'll probably do that for LO too. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-choose-which-friends-your-lo-can-be-friends-with#post-71517 Thu, 09 Feb 2012 16:56:31 +0000 Andrea 71517@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@banana: yeah, I cannot believe what a dork I was. That all ended when I went away to college, though. I had a lot of stuff to get out of my system! LOL. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-choose-which-friends-your-lo-can-be-friends-with#post-71513 Thu, 09 Feb 2012 16:54:00 +0000 banana 71513@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@andrea: Lucky parents! I would love it if my LO went to the library to hang out with friends! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-choose-which-friends-your-lo-can-be-friends-with#post-71512 Thu, 09 Feb 2012 16:52:52 +0000 Andrea 71512@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@banana: true. Kids can be very sneaky. But in my case, my parents saw all I was doing with my friends was stuff like going to the library. So they had nothing to worry about! Man, they really lucked out. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-choose-which-friends-your-lo-can-be-friends-with#post-71493 Thu, 09 Feb 2012 16:32:12 +0000 prettylizy 71493@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I can't imagine telling him/her who they can be friends with, but I sure as heck will be weary of sketchy people! lol! I know I had one friend growing up that my parents didn't really care for (well, they mostly didn't care for the type of parent her mother was... but that's a whole other post) so they would always drop me off and pick me up, never let me ride my bike there or walk. I didn't even realise at the time the precautions they were taking, but looking back I totally see it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-choose-which-friends-your-lo-can-be-friends-with#post-71487 Thu, 09 Feb 2012 16:19:17 +0000 banana 71487@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@andrea: I hope my LO hangs out with goody-goodies too! I'm just afraid that I won't know if they are bad or good kids! I've had some "bad" friends that were SO good at faking being good in front of parents. My mom would be like "Oh, she's a sweet girl" and I'm like "uhhhh you don't even know mom". </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-choose-which-friends-your-lo-can-be-friends-with#post-71484 Thu, 09 Feb 2012 16:17:01 +0000 Andrea 71484@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I will do something if she's hanging out with the wrong crowd. But if she chose to hang out with other goody-goodies, like I did, then what is there to complain about? :-) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-choose-which-friends-your-lo-can-be-friends-with#post-71476 Thu, 09 Feb 2012 16:10:08 +0000 banana 71476@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had an interesting conversation with a co-worker the other day about this. She was appalled that I would choose my LO's friends because she believed that choosing friends creates distrust between the parent and child and it would be similar to choosing who they love. It was interesting to hear her point of view. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-choose-which-friends-your-lo-can-be-friends-with#post-71449 Thu, 09 Feb 2012 15:58:06 +0000 mediagirl 71449@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think so because I do recall not telling my Mom a lot about what I did/saw at some of my sketchier friend's houses. I think I will be a lot more careful about my LO's friends just because of what I saw as a kid! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-choose-which-friends-your-lo-can-be-friends-with#post-71425 Thu, 09 Feb 2012 15:51:34 +0000 Rubies 71425@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Absolutely. I will be very open and have their friends come over after school and stay for dinner, etc. for me to know what kind of people they are. If they seem sketchy to me then I will limit LO's time with those friends. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-choose-which-friends-your-lo-can-be-friends-with#post-71374 Thu, 09 Feb 2012 15:39:08 +0000 chopsuey 71374@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>definitely! if we think her friends are a bad influence, etc. we won't let her be friends with them. it's easy to control when they're young.. a little more tricky when they're older. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-choose-which-friends-your-lo-can-be-friends-with#post-71351 Thu, 09 Feb 2012 15:28:49 +0000 banana 71351@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom 100% had to approve of any friends that I hung out with at school. If she heard that I made a new friend at school, she would insist that I bring her/him over to our house for dinner so that she could meet him. Man...I hated that during high school. </p> <p>But now as a parent myself, I could see why she wanted to choose my friends because it has shaped me into the person that I am today.</p> <p>Will you choose your LO's friends? Or do you believe they should be able to choose their own friends? </p>