https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 03 May 2026 17:43:56 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-feel-guilty-if-you-cant-provide-the-same-things-to-all-your-los#post-830832 Tue, 04 Jun 2013 16:12:39 +0000 rawrasaur 830832@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't think I will. Not everyone has the same needs and I will do what is best for each individual child. I also know I am only human and can't do everything. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-feel-guilty-if-you-cant-provide-the-same-things-to-all-your-los#post-830803 Tue, 04 Jun 2013 15:57:02 +0000 GrapeCrush 830803@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@regberadaisy: thanks :) we'll find out soon enough if things work this time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-feel-guilty-if-you-cant-provide-the-same-things-to-all-your-los#post-830576 Tue, 04 Jun 2013 14:44:58 +0000 MamaMoose 830576@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@daniellemybelle: As you know I'm a WOHM and my LO is crazy obsessed with me. Don't worry... your LO will be too : ) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-feel-guilty-if-you-cant-provide-the-same-things-to-all-your-los#post-830547 Tue, 04 Jun 2013 14:38:03 +0000 Honeybee 830547@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No, not usually. I try to just make sure I'm meeting the kids' needs, but that doesn't always mean they get everything equally. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-feel-guilty-if-you-cant-provide-the-same-things-to-all-your-los#post-830165 Tue, 04 Jun 2013 13:11:14 +0000 chopsuey 830165@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DD is still breastfed at 26 months old! (just once a day).<br /> I swear this girl's going to want to nurse til she's 4.<br /> I feel bad that DS won't get it as long as his sister, but I plan on going for 2 years with him too.. unless he decides he wants to wean earlier. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-feel-guilty-if-you-cant-provide-the-same-things-to-all-your-los#post-830156 Tue, 04 Jun 2013 13:09:43 +0000 daniellemybelle 830156@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes, I worry about this and LO isn't even here yet. I'm going to be a working mom (in some capacity) while LO #1 is small but I hope to be able to be a SAHM sometime in the future. I worry that I will have a stronger bond with future LOs if that happens because I will spend more time with them, but I just look at all the kids who adore their working moms and I know it's not true. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-feel-guilty-if-you-cant-provide-the-same-things-to-all-your-los#post-830150 Tue, 04 Jun 2013 13:07:53 +0000 Foodnerd81 830150@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think about it sometimes but can't say I'm really that worried about it. I'm one of 5 kids so yes, we had different opportunities and levels of attention, but I don't think any of us were slighted because of it. My parents were really careful not to set precedents with the older ones that they couldn't follow through for all of us though, so in that way, it worked out better for the younger ones (like they didn't know if they could put all of us in dance lessons, so my older sister didn't have them when she was young, but by the time my youngest sister wanted them, they knew they could afford them). </p> <p>But I'm the middle child so of course I think about how everyone is so, so, so excited for the first one and then after that it's like, ok, and now another one... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-feel-guilty-if-you-cant-provide-the-same-things-to-all-your-los#post-830111 Tue, 04 Jun 2013 13:02:25 +0000 jmarionsmith 830111@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>yes. because i've learned so much more about bfing (thanks to hellobee!) i think i will be much more prepared and will be able to with #2. i will feel sooo guilty about not bfing #1. (not that don't already)</p> <p>also, i'm worried that #2 won't feel as special. there is no doubt that #1 is our world. will we feel the same way about our second baby?? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-feel-guilty-if-you-cant-provide-the-same-things-to-all-your-los#post-830059 Tue, 04 Jun 2013 12:53:28 +0000 looch 830059@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We're one and done, but it's not because of giving our son more or less than another sibling. Each child is different and requires different things.</p> <p>Case in point, my parents. They have 3 children, one with severe special needs. He got more of my parents time than both my brother and I. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-feel-guilty-if-you-cant-provide-the-same-things-to-all-your-los#post-830047 Tue, 04 Jun 2013 12:50:57 +0000 heffalump 830047@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents always told us that they don't treat us the same. They will do what they can, but sometimes it's not always possible and they can't always afford to treat us all equally. </p> <p>For example, my sister got to go on a trip to Israel when she was 16 and I really really wanted to go when I turned 16 too. My dad said I could only go if I got a scholarship. My sister didn't get one but she still go to go, but a few years later they didn't have the same money that they did before. Luckily I was the only one who applied for the scholarship :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-feel-guilty-if-you-cant-provide-the-same-things-to-all-your-los#post-830032 Tue, 04 Jun 2013 12:47:42 +0000 MsLipGloss 830032@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mewtill: I worry about this too (even though we are very likely only having 1 baby!). BabyGloss really is my little buddy (she is my heart!) and I can't imagine having the same bond with another child.</p> <p>@MamaMoose: I am seriously worried about trying to continue to work with a second . . . my MIL has been watching BabyGloss since I went back to work, and I don't know that that would be an option again. So, *IF* we had a second, s/he would be in daycare sooner. And that both terrifies me and makes me sad (that s/he wouldn't have had an experience similar to Baby Gloss). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-feel-guilty-if-you-cant-provide-the-same-things-to-all-your-los#post-830025 Tue, 04 Jun 2013 12:45:58 +0000 regberadaisy 830025@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@swurlygurl: @TurtleDoves: @stargal: haha in a perfect world I want four. But we can never afford that. :P</p> <p>If #2 is a boy we're stopping at 2. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-feel-guilty-if-you-cant-provide-the-same-things-to-all-your-los#post-830009 Tue, 04 Jun 2013 12:43:00 +0000 swurlygurl 830009@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Kind of. DD will get to travel more than #2, #3 and #4, because the more plane tickets we have to buy, the less traveling we'll do.</p> <p>@stargal: @TurtleDoves: Yay for wanting 4 kids! People think I'm crazyyy </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-feel-guilty-if-you-cant-provide-the-same-things-to-all-your-los#post-829938 Tue, 04 Jun 2013 12:31:08 +0000 SugarplumsMom 829938@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Is it bad that I won't feel guilty about it. For instance, if we have another girl, she'd get some awesome hand me downs. If we have a boy, he'd play with all her toys. I honestl think I'd be too busy keeping up, I wouldn't get the chance to feel any guilt. O_O </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-feel-guilty-if-you-cant-provide-the-same-things-to-all-your-los#post-829924 Tue, 04 Jun 2013 12:28:38 +0000 regberadaisy 829924@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@sarbear: IF you want to do that and it works I will be your personal cheerleader! I have a pump you can use! ;) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-feel-guilty-if-you-cant-provide-the-same-things-to-all-your-los#post-829918 Tue, 04 Jun 2013 12:27:43 +0000 regberadaisy 829918@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes. My DH grew up in a house where MIL *heavily* favored one child over the other. Although she will deny it to her grave. I never want our child to feel what he felt growing up even in the tiniest bit. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-feel-guilty-if-you-cant-provide-the-same-things-to-all-your-los#post-829914 Tue, 04 Jun 2013 12:26:52 +0000 CupQuakeWalk 829914@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@stargal: so does running elley...and we all have the same BFing aspirations with #2. TWIIIINSIIESSS </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-feel-guilty-if-you-cant-provide-the-same-things-to-all-your-los#post-829907 Tue, 04 Jun 2013 12:25:32 +0000 stargal 829907@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@TurtleDoves: i think we are twins, i want four too! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-feel-guilty-if-you-cant-provide-the-same-things-to-all-your-los#post-829902 Tue, 04 Jun 2013 12:24:18 +0000 CupQuakeWalk 829902@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Not really....I KNOW I will love them all the same and I know I will show them and they will feel it. Who cares if one one them got to go the park more than the other? In the long run, the kids will all feel bonded, loved and taken care of. I doubt they'll notice.<br /> I am waiting until we have all 4 kids to do things like Disneyland or anything though, so no one misses it. If all goes to plan, we will have 4 under 10yr so it'll work out. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-feel-guilty-if-you-cant-provide-the-same-things-to-all-your-los#post-829863 Tue, 04 Jun 2013 12:15:56 +0000 GrapeCrush 829863@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sometimes, especially since LO #2 will be here in just under 2 months. I struggled with BFing DS and stopped pumping after 2 weeks for my own sanity. I said though if BFing works this time I'm going to pump some and give some to DS in a cup </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-feel-guilty-if-you-cant-provide-the-same-things-to-all-your-los#post-829783 Tue, 04 Jun 2013 12:00:25 +0000 JoyfulKiwi 829783@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sometimes, like when I cuddle him after a night feed for a little extra long. I just think I'll be too exhausted with two and won't give the same one-on-one attention. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-feel-guilty-if-you-cant-provide-the-same-things-to-all-your-los#post-829752 Tue, 04 Jun 2013 11:55:41 +0000 MamaMoose 829752@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@stargal: Your posts are what inspired me to start this one ; ) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-feel-guilty-if-you-cant-provide-the-same-things-to-all-your-los#post-829744 Tue, 04 Jun 2013 11:53:40 +0000 stargal 829744@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes a lot. i know i wont be able to give my full attention to two kiids and i worry about how that will affect them. also breastfeeding didnt work out for my first lo and if it works out for my second lo i will feel bad. so now im gona try to bf both :) my first lo deserves the best too! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-feel-guilty-if-you-cant-provide-the-same-things-to-all-your-los#post-829719 Tue, 04 Jun 2013 11:48:43 +0000 MamaMoose 829719@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Chalk this up to a combo of being a general worrier and a good case of mommy guilt but I often worry about being able to provide my children with equal experiences. For example, we just made it to six months with LO totally on breastmilk and I was (and am) so so proud of reaching that goal. But I'm already worried that I will feel really guilty if for some reason I'm not able to do the same for our future LO(s). Anyone else worry about these things? </p>