https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 22 Apr 2026 04:30:59 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2782122 Thu, 26 Oct 2017 08:11:09 +0000 Mamaof2 2782122@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@gingerbebe: haha I tell him all the time that his future wife is going to love me because I taught him how to clean! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2782085 Thu, 26 Oct 2017 02:07:10 +0000 SugarplumsMom 2782085@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>To an extent. DH and I aren't as neat as I wish we were, but I will enforce simple rules, like no food in bed, no food left out anywhere in the house, changing outdoor clothes before going into bed, clearing the floor so we can actually walk - that kind of thing. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2782082 Thu, 26 Oct 2017 00:15:28 +0000 gingerbebe 2782082@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think at 9 it's an attitude/autonomy issue, but for me I would want to get to the heart of why it ticks him off to clean his room. I think 9 is plenty old enough to have a reasonable discussion about attitude and respect for your parents, as well as reasons why being orderly is important.</p> <p>I might say something like when you leave your drawers open and your room messy, it makes us feel like you don't appreciate the things we work hard to provide you, like clean comfy clothes, nice furniture, a nice bed. So when we ask you to clean, we're asking you to respect us and respect the things we have provided you because we love you so much. When you huff and puff about cleaning up, it makes us feel sad and it hurts our feelings. By asking you to clean, we are also trying to teach you take good care of your living space so that someday when you have your own place, you will know how to manage it. Your roommate or wife might not like living with someone who's messy all the time.</p> <p>Then maybe negotiate ways you will allow messiness/autonomy, like he has to clean up on Tuesday night because laundry happens on Wednesday. Floors have to be clear at all times because of the vacuum and people stepping on things and injuring themselves, but you will allow one big clear storage bin to keep random junk in. Beds can be left unmade, but drawers have to be closed. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2782066 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 21:36:15 +0000 Chuckles 2782066@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's interesting to me to think about whether kids who are "taught" to clean up will end up being neater adults or whether it's just a personality trait. Growing up, I always fought with my mom about keeping my room clean. She never really "taught" me to clean, but I just remember it was a lot of arguments about why my room was so messy. And I was super jealous of a friend whose mom got tired of the battle and just had her keep her mess confined to her room. And her room was a complete disaster.<br /> The thing is, I've ended up being someone whose natural inclination is towards messy chaos, but I much prefer to live in a house where things are clean with a low level of mess and clutter, so I really work at being at least somewhat organized. Whereas my friend's house is still a complete disaster. So neither of us were really "taught" how to be neat, but we've ended up very differently as adults. Also, I have to add that, at this point, my house is way cleaner than my mom's :silly: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2782042 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 18:33:54 +0000 lamariniere 2782042@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I’m trying! I’ve always been a tidy person, so it makes me crazy to see the mess in my LO’s bedrooms. We’ve been working on putting away toys when we are done with them and not dumping entire boxes of toys on the floor. There is an expectation that the floor is clear. In the common areas, things stay tidy and orderly. They are, of course, allowed to play in the living area, but it has to be picked up every evening. When we had a cleaning lady, I also had them pick up their toys before she came. It wasn’t her job to pick up and put away toys. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2782029 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 17:15:21 +0000 misolee 2782029@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm a tidy person so I do look the other way most of the time. I think couple of toys in active play is okay. Any more than that is just a mess. It also drives me super crazy when things that belong together are everywhere bc things get lost and the purpose of the toy is lost. For example, puzzles in their boxes or ziploc, the magnatiles in the magnatiles box, etc.</p> <p>Now clothes, I do have a problem with it being everywhere. We have a hamper in each room and dirty clothes go into the hamper. Sometimes she digs for certain items and things get everywhere but as long as it's in a drawer than I'm okay. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2782028 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 17:03:11 +0000 Mama Bird 2782028@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nope, as long as you can walk around the room without stepping on toys, it's good with me. Sometimes they just build something on the floor and don't want to take it apart. I'll encourage them to clean messes just because I think it's good for one's self-esteem to not live in a pigsty... but definitely not picking battles over it. </p> <p>Toys in the living room, now... that drives me stark raving mad. I think I just need one place that the mess isn't allowed into :silly: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2781971 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 14:03:58 +0000 honeybear 2781971@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For his room: Clean is a requirement; orderly is not (with some exceptions).</p> <p>For common areas: Clean is a requirement; orderly is too (within reason--I mean, our house looks occupied!). </p> <p>The main thing regarding housekeeping that I want him to leave our house knowing is how to be efficiently self-sufficient. So I teach him how to clean, how to organize, how to weed out stuff, etc. and I expect him to do certain tasks to pitch in. But piles of books don't bother me at all and if he's okay with Legos on his floor, I am too, as long as they're not there when I need to vacuum. As long as things aren't being mistreated, some creative disorder is fine. </p> <p>As for open dresser drawers, that isn't a problem for him because he hasn't got any. I decided when we moved into our new house that *I* really dislike dressers for clothing storage (folding is a PITA, it's hard to see what's in them, and we've got loads of closet space), so everything except underwear, socks, linens, and super delicate stuff gets hung up. It's easier to see what you've got this way anyhow. So maybe something like that is an option? The only stuff you need for my method is plenty of hangers and bins for underwear and socks. </p> <p>I don't do laundry that hasn't found its way into the hamper. He's old enough to sort the lights from the darks when he takes his stuff off, so that's a requirement around here. If it's not in the right spot when I go to retrieve the dirty laundry, he doesn't have it until I wash that load again. (I will give gentle reminders once and while, but I've also let him go without socks for a day to drive the point home that I don't want them left by the front door when he takes off his shoes!) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2781967 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 13:59:49 +0000 catgirl 2781967@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mamaof2: then I would mostly let it go. Say that in order for laundry to be done all dirty clothes need to be in the hamper, the room needs to be able to be vacuumed however often you prefer, and any other non negotiable things you can come up with. But beyond those let him keep it how he wants. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2781960 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 13:47:32 +0000 Mae 2781960@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>not really. they will have to keep dirty clothes in hamper, put away clean clothes, and pick up every 2 weeks so the cleaning people can clean. Otherwise I'm pretty easy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2781953 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 13:40:10 +0000 Mamaof2 2781953@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@catgirl: He will clean the playroom and his computer desk in the playroom - this seems to be an issue with his bedroom - so he knows HOW to but chooses not to</p> <p>@looch: I'll ask him </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2781951 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 13:33:37 +0000 cyndistar3 2781951@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My 3 girls have one room to sleep in and a play room. We have them clean up at least their bedroom every evening before bed, usually both rooms though. I'm really trying to teach them that if you clean up at the end of the day it's not as big of a task as cleaning a huge mess a week later. But that's really because I am working on that myself, I tend to get overwhelmed easily and I wish I had learned that lesson earlier in life. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2781947 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 13:22:17 +0000 looch 2781947@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mamaof2: i would start there, why doesn't he like to use the baskets? Does he feel like it makes the situation worse? My husband doesn't like to use bins, he prefers clear containers of a smaller size inside bigger drawers as an example.</p> <p>And regarding the drawers not being closed, my mom leaves every single kitchen cabinet that she opens wide open, and it is super annoying to my dad, who goes around and closes them. The thing is that her method is that she will close them later, when she's cleaning up. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2781946 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 13:18:27 +0000 catgirl 2781946@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't expect her room to a be a showroom or anything. But there will be an expectation that it's not a complete disaster. We don't plan to allow food or drinks (except water) so hopefully it would never be gross, just cluttered. I have no problems helping her figure out storage needs and making sure she has what she needs to keep a clean room - shelves, baskets, hanging storage, etc. </p> <p>While I don't want this to be some huge, ongoing battle, I think it is important to learn HOW to keep things clean and mostly organized. DH was never expected to keep his room clean or help clean the house. It's been a struggle to have him figure it out as an adult. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2781942 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 13:09:51 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 2781942@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Most likely not because then I would have to set the example. :silly: Food and drink are not allowed upstairs/ in the bedroom so LO's room shouldn't be too horrid. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2781940 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 13:08:05 +0000 Mrsbells 2781940@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mamaof2: Yes absolutely it is worth fighting and it will pay off. I think its a good life lesson to just have a habit of keeping their own room tidy. My 5 year old already knows that to the extent of her capability she has to keep her room tidy or she will lose out on fun time to go back and clean it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2781938 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 13:04:51 +0000 MaryM 2781938@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Because I WISH someone had taught DH how to put things away, I think it's a battle worth fighting. </p> <p>I don't think a room has to be picked up 100% every day. But we were expected to dust and vacuum once a week, put laundry in a hamper, and put our own clothes away. </p> <p>I can't stand it when DH empties his pockets and puts trash on the coffee table (as he's heading toward the bathroom where there's a trashcan!) </p> <p>I have a hard time dealing with one man's piles, I don't think I can take another one. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2781919 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 11:50:12 +0000 Freckles 2781919@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It used to drive me nuts seeing clothes strewn all over the floor so once DD5 started school, i gave her duties/chores - one is to hang up her PJs on her hanger once she has changed (she usually will hang up the clothes she is going to wear the night before). The other is to put all of her laundered clothes in a basket (from the many loads i run!) and put them in her drawers. I have labelled her drawers so she knows exactly where to put them, and i tell her that i don't care when she puts them away as long as it's done before the following weekend and the clothes remain in the basket.</p> <p>Thankfully the kids don't have too many toys, it's just the books that get cluttered. I've found that coming up with a solution to encourage desired behaviours has worked better than nagging/reminding them all the time. But i'm also normal and will sometimes threaten to toss everything out if they keep creating these messes! :P </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2781913 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 11:27:33 +0000 snowjewelz 2781913@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This will be interesting as my girls grow up and I'm super crazy about cleaning up. I think there has to base line of how clean their room needs to be; that is agreed upon by all. But anything further, I'd probably do it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2781904 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 10:56:15 +0000 maddyz 2781904@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes but we live in a small two bedroom apartment so there is not room for mess to be left around.</p> <p>That being said... my room is a pile of things we need to get rid of (think of a MUCH smaller version of what might be in your garage) and it makes me totally crazy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2781903 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 10:50:03 +0000 Adira 2781903@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@T.H.O.U.: My youngest is only 2, but I suspect he might be like this too. My eldest is not related to me at all - he LOVES cleaning his room! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2781902 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 10:46:42 +0000 T.H.O.U. 2781902@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: My daughter is one of those that will throw the clothes down next to the hamper. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2781900 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 10:46:18 +0000 T.H.O.U. 2781900@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Also I think there may be a balance in letting the cleanliness/order let go on a day to day basis, but maybe weekly/monthly there is a "clean up time". I dont mind letting it get bad but eventually I think its important to have it cleaned up and a fresh start. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2781888 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 09:35:57 +0000 Mamaof2 2781888@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@periwinklebee: yes you must be right - it must be more about autonomy</p> <p>He has plenty of baskets for storage - just chooses not to use them </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2781882 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 09:24:04 +0000 periwinklebee 2781882@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Your son sounds like my husband :wink: </p> <p>I don't personally have experience with older kids, but if it were me I'd try to make sure that it's super easy to put everything in it's place and find it once it's in its place - i.e. dresser drawers aren't overstuffed, easy to find toys on a shelf rather than having to rummage through a big bin, etc. Having an easy place to put and find things did help a lot with my husband's aversion to neatness...But if it's easy to put things away and take them back out, and he still won't, it seems more like an issue about autonomy than anything and I would shut the door and let it go rather than having a constant struggle... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2781881 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 09:22:46 +0000 looch 2781881@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: yes, agreed, on having the storage available.</p> <p>I don't care what goes in the bins, it can be all mixed up for all I care. I am not specific that all legos have to be in one bin and all cars in the other, that's up to my kid to navigate. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2781879 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 09:17:23 +0000 erinbaderin 2781879@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm really tidy. That being said, I don't think it's fair that the rest of my family needs to be really tidy just because I am. I have expectations for public rooms, but I hope I'm able to let their rooms be messy if that's how they want them (they're both under 4 right now so it's not really an issue I've had to face). As long as clothes make it into the laundry bin by laundry day and there's no food in there I'd like to be able to let it go. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2781878 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 09:16:53 +0000 Adira 2781878@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>One of the things I recently did though is get both kids shelving for storage. Now when they do have to clean their rooms (so I can vacuum), they can just throw all the little things into these big bins and big items go on shelves. Having an easy place to store everything does make it a lot easier to clean up. </p> [attach=340/17/oyduc5.600x450.storage.jpg] https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2781876 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 09:14:07 +0000 Adira 2781876@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@T.H.O.U.: @Mamaof2: With response to clothes - I guess that's our one other rule - dirty clothes go in the hamper. Each kid has a hamper in their room and their dirty clothes automatically go into at the end of the day when they change into their PJs. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/will-you-require-your-kids-room-to-be-clean-and-orderly#post-2781873 Wed, 25 Oct 2017 09:08:35 +0000 ShootingStar 2781873@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was never great at keeping my room clean as a kid either. I would let it get to be a horrible mess and then dread cleaning it up. I hope to encourage our kids to be a little neater than I was. But my kids have a playroom with lots of storage so all the toys can get picked up in about 5 minutes. As a kid all my stuff was in my room and it wasn't super easy to put away.</p> <p>The big things for me are: </p> <p>1)Dirty clothes go into the hamper. There's just no reason to throw things on the floor when they can go right into hamper in their rooms.</p> <p>2)Floor gets picked up every 2 weeks before the cleaning person comes. </p>