https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 09 Apr 2026 00:47:15 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2433753 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 20:17:07 +0000 JenGirl 2433753@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@birdofafeather: KY. Everything ended up being dismssed and she wasn't charged with anything and got the kid back but it was emotionally scarring for her. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2433737 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 19:57:40 +0000 Mrs.KMM 2433737@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am so sick of people shaming others for parenting choices. Would I leave my child while making a return at Target? No. But this woman doesn't deserve to be publicly shamed for making a different choice where her child was in little to no danger. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2433658 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 18:33:33 +0000 Boogs 2433658@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@psw27: I couldn't agree more. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2433553 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 16:59:39 +0000 birdofafeather 2433553@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@JenGirl: holy shit. That's crazy! What state is that? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2433422 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 15:37:01 +0000 Mrs Spoon 2433422@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@catomd00: I'm sure I'm not sure if you read my full post as you're really narrowing in on just one point without full context and building a somewhat slippery slope of inter- parental judgement that I absolutely didn't intend.</p> <p>I think this guy crossed the line. I think he was a total jerk in this situation. But I do give him the benefit of the doubt in that he probably came from a place of good intention in that he had a valid concern for a kid/baby (who knows how old the child is) who was left out of sight of the mom for longer than I think most parents would feel comfortable with. Honestly, with all the publicity around kids being left in cars I think most people do think it's illegal to do what this woman did. I could not tell you the specifics around the laws in my area of what would be considered legal or illegal with leaving a kid in a car unattended. </p> <p>I certainly probably could have phrased part of my post better in that if someone has a valid concern, I don't think there is anything wrong with saying something to an adult directly in a respectful manner (not yelling or bullying) if they are a witness. If I saw someone hit their kid in a public place, yeah I would probably say something. Do I think people should be publicly shamed or yelled at--no. But sometimes people (parents and non-parents) act and aren't thinking. If someone points something out or shares another point of view, well, it might be something they listen to. That's the prerogative of the person who chooses to intervene. The receiver can choose what to do with that. I have had lots of unsolicited advice from strangers. Sometimes I roll my eyes and ignore. Other times I think, yeah that's a valid point. I didn't think or know about that. But even if I disagree, I would rather have someone tell me to my face instead of calling the cops and then have to deal with that. </p> <p>Overall, this is a grey area in my opinion, not black and white as you are suggesting. Just my 2 cents. Take if for what you will. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2433339 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 14:36:15 +0000 JenGirl 2433339@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hmmm. I generally think that people are way too overprotective about kids in cars alone. Most kids that die in cars alone have parents that left them alone accidentally because they forgot they were in the car. Not kids whose parents have run into the house or a store for a couple minutes.</p> <p>If the weather is mild and it's a baby sleeping in a car seat that they can't get out of, I see no realistic danger from leaving them alone in the locked car for a few minutes. Especially if you can keep them in sight, like at a gas station.</p> <p>A return at Target is a bit questionable as it could take more than a few minutes. Don't know how long she was gone. But the guy who yelled at her and recorded it was a complete asshole. If you're worried, check on the baby and if they look fine, just stand by the car for a few minutes to see if the parent shows up. Obviously if the kid looks to be in distress, do what you need to do, but don't jump to reporting people.</p> <p>I have a friend whose 7 month old baby had been sleeping horribly and she'd just fallen asleep in the car. She had to pick something up at Home Depot. She called ahead and had them pull her item and paid by CC, so all she had to do was walk in, grab her bag and sign the receipt. So she parked in the shade on a mild fall day, locked the car and ran in. Baby was sleeping in a car seat that he couldn't get out of and didn't have any blankets or any suffocation risks within reach. She was gone all of 2-3 minutes. But in that time, someone saw the baby and called the police. Like immediately called the police. She came out and this lady was on the phone with the police and yelling at her and wouldn't let her leave until the police showed up. She thinks the lady saw her check on the baby and shut the door and head inside and instead of calling out to her, she just called the police. They took her baby and wouldn't wait until her husband could get there. Kept the baby overnight and fed the baby formula (she was breastfeeding). It was an absolute nightmare. I truly believe her baby wasn't in any real danger, except from the lady that reported her and the system that pulled the baby from her care. </p> <p>So I don't leave my baby in the car, more from fear of people reporting me than actual fear over harm for the baby. Which is a sad state of affairs. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2433337 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 14:32:31 +0000 pinkcupcake 2433337@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: thanks for the link, very interesting!</p> <p>im of the mind your own business camp - or if you truly think it's dangerous, call the cops. This is all the same as ppl thinking kids aren't buckled into their car seats properly, etc, etc. Just annoying to me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2433335 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 14:29:07 +0000 BSB 2433335@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@psw27: I agree. That is the best way to react to this situation. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2433328 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 14:25:36 +0000 psw27 2433328@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Would I do this? No. Not target or anywhere where I had to enter a building where I would not be able to see my child or the car. Would I run to an ATM or quickly stuff books into a library return slot? Probably. It is all about line of sight to me. For parents who live in the city, we deal with these kind of hard decisions all the time - double parking to haul groceries in, etc. </p> <p>I would be pissed if some jackass was videoing me and posting it to facebook to shame me and have everyone commenting with their opinions on my parenting. Perhaps he could have just waited by the car and said, I saw the baby and I was a little worried so I waited but she's okay and you are here now so bye. Maybe people could just be nice for once. :bummed: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2433327 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 14:25:08 +0000 BSB 2433327@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: Thanks for posting that link. I was wondering what my state's laws are. </p> <p>I do wonder what they consider a running car. I have remote start where it is not possible for someone to steal my car because the keys are not in the car. If it's cold out, am I able to use remote start to keep the car warm, while I run inside to get my phone. I'm thinking I would use this if the car is parked outside of a house (my, relative's or friend's house). Granted, if I run in my house for a quick minute that the temperature of the car won't drop, so remote start wouldn't help. I wouldn't leave the kids in the long enough for the temp to drop, but I can see someone judging me if the car wasn't on, even if it was for a minute. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2433313 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 14:16:47 +0000 Adira 2433313@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pinkcupcake: Here's the breakdown by states of where this is/isn't legal:</p> <p><a href="http://www.freerangekids.com/laws/" rel="nofollow">http://www.freerangekids.com/laws/</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2433299 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 14:10:05 +0000 pinkcupcake 2433299@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm surprised it's legal to leave to leave your child in the car like this. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2433265 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 13:58:23 +0000 alphagam84 2433265@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>The only time I'd leave DD in the car is a quick thing. For example, at our library you can return your books in a slot outside of the building. I can park my car and be within 50 feet of the slot. I'd leave DD in the car (with it locked and keys on me) for something like that. I can't imagine ever going into a store though and not having eyes on her. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2433216 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 13:33:24 +0000 catomd00 2433216@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs Spoon: so is it also ok to give random parents a "slap in the face" about their legal decisions to circumcise, vaccinate or not, forward face before 2, etc? Why does someone else get to judge what is the "error in her ways" when she's doing something perfectly legal? Every parenting decision is a balance of risks and benefits. Some are more risk averse than others. Just because we disagree doesn't make another decision wrong or worthy of being yelled at and shamed by someone else. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2433157 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 13:08:16 +0000 HLK208 2433157@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I personally would never leave my kids in the car unless it's in the garage (if I forgot something) and only if the garage wasn't hot.</p> <p>But I hate that this man is SHOUTING at her for her parenting choices. It wasn't illegal and the weather wasn't extreme. If he didn't take a video and spoke to her kindly about the dangers of leaving a child in a car, I think that would be more acceptable. Still, there were a lot of parents who did this at DS's preschool and I never thought of confronting them about it (I did offer to watch their kids while they ran into the school though). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2433142 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 13:02:04 +0000 BandDmommy 2433142@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't think it's right this person left their baby in the car but I also do not agree with public shaming. If he cared that much about the child he should have stood by the car or tried to stop the woman. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2433138 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 12:58:36 +0000 Mrs Spoon 2433138@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I saw this video earlier this week as it was taken in my hometown so popped on on my FB feed.</p> <p>I think leaving your baby alone in the car in a target parking lot is a bad idea. Maybe she had a lapse in judgment or maybe she always makes questionable decisions. I don't have a huge issue with someone confronting a parent if they witness a situation like this. Sometimes people need just a little slap in the face if you will to help them see either the error of their ways or a different point of view.</p> <p> But the public shaming is out of control. How is it his place to sit in judgment publically on FB? As a parent, he should sympathize in that we all have had moments that were not our finest and to have them captured on video and shared on FB would be pretty awful. The just is clearly a self-righteous jerk. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2433135 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 12:56:49 +0000 ShootingStar 2433135@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't think this was a great parenting decision and it's not one that I would make. I don't see that it's that hard to grab your stroller and throw the bucket seat in it. I'd imagine a return at Target could take about 10 minutes, that would be a little more than I'm comfortable with my child being out of my sight for. </p> <p>But I do think the guy over reacted and was a serious dick to be filming her. It wasn't hot, it wasn't cold, she was only gone a few minutes and she didn't do anything that's illegal. I see people make parenting choices all the time that I wouldn't do (hello carseats perched precariously on shopping carts) but I don't shame them about their choices. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2433106 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 12:42:57 +0000 catomd00 2433106@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@looch: it would be unfortunate if something happened but yes I'd still feel the same. This woman did nothing illegal, she made a parenting decision she is well within her right to do and this guy was completely out of line. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2433035 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 12:06:01 +0000 looch 2433035@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am just curious, though, how much of everyone's opinion hinges on the outcome? Meaning, if the child hadn't been fine, would everyone feel the same way?</p> <p>I do think the guy didn't need to whip out his phone, but at the same time, we're putting cameras on cops, everyone's being watched. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2433024 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 11:58:03 +0000 coopsmama 2433024@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@daniellemybelle: Actually, this guy is a parent. He's from where I live. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2433019 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 11:51:15 +0000 daniellemybelle 2433019@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yeah, I am with those of you who said that this guy who made the video (who is not even a parent) is a total jerk.</p> <p>We can all agree that it was unwise but I don't think we all need to virtually crowd around to point fingers and shame someone. Better things to do. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2432978 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 11:23:14 +0000 BSB 2432978@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@PrincessBaby: Yeah, I try to load diaper bags and such before I take the babies. My rule is the babies are the last thing I take to the car. But if I forget my phone and my car is in the driveway, I'll run in and get it real quick. </p> <p>@Adira: @T.H.O.U.: I agree with you. </p> <p>@Littlebit7: Yeah, that's tricky. I used to live in an apartment complex on the second floor and I know how much of a hassle it is to bring groceries in pre baby. Now, I could see myself putting the babies in secured spot (like a crib) and turning on my baby monitor app on my ipad and using my phone to monitor them while I bring stuff in. I haven't used it for this particular situation but when I flew home for Christmas and didn't bring my baby monitor, the app I downloaded (Baby Monitor by Annie) was a great alternative if you have access to wifi. It alerts me when babies are crying. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2432971 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 11:20:30 +0000 Ginabean3 2432971@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Wow, that's crazy...there have been times when I've waited like 20 min to return something at Target! </p> <p>I will leave LO in our car in our garage (connected to our single family home) with the door to the garage to the house open if I need to run back in and get something. But that's about it. I've been tempted before to leave them in the car (especially when they are sleeping) when I drop off dry cleaning (the parking spot is literally right in front of the door, excellent line of sight) but I always chicken out and just haul both of them out. I figure the ONE time I leave them in there someone's going to report me or somethings going to happen. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2432859 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 10:16:51 +0000 catomd00 2432859@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This guy was way out of line. It's none of his business and she did nothing illegal. Who does he think he is who gets to dictate how she parents?! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2432817 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 09:59:20 +0000 Greentea 2432817@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@T.H.O.U.: Yup. To me it is a golden rule. We have underground parking, so YES! I am pretty intense with safety, and maybe partly it is different because we live in a city. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2432793 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 09:48:41 +0000 T.H.O.U. 2432793@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Greentea: I think while that sounds good as an ideal, its just not practical. So if you load the baby up and realize you forgot your phone in the house, are you going to unstrap the baby and go back inside which is 3 feet from the car? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2432788 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 09:47:24 +0000 Greentea 2432788@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't think it is ever okay to leave a LO in the car alone. Thought that was a golden rule, even on your property, for a million reasons, least of all in case someone forgets, which I have read on here happens. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2432730 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 09:23:31 +0000 Littlebit7 2432730@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@LindsayInNY: oh gosh this made me have a flashback. When we lived in Manhattan 2 years ago we lived in a 4th floor walk up and had a fireplace (pre baby) and firewood was the bane of our existence. (Real problems, I know I know). But we'd juggle the car , not getting a ticket, schlepping wood up 4 flights. Ugh! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/woman-leaves-baby-in-the-car-to-return-an-item-at-target#post-2432723 Fri, 22 Jan 2016 09:19:39 +0000 LindsayInNY 2432723@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Littlebit7: Same here. We're on a 4th floor walk up and park our car a 5 minute walk away. I usually schedule errands when DH can help afterwards. But tonight, for example, we want to get some firewood from a nearby gas station. I can either let DH go when he gets home from work at 7:45, cutting into his time with DD. Or I could stop on my way home from daycare. But then what do I do with DD? Leave her in the car out front while I run into the gas station to pay? It's literally just to buy it, not even to bring it inside at home. </p>