https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 27 May 2026 13:39:02 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worrying-coping-mechanisms#post-2710418 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 20:07:52 +0000 catlady 2710418@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've dealt with anxiety many times in the past. Guided meditation is what I always come back to, and also just distracting my brain with something pleasant (sitcom, novel, interesting podcast). Being social always helps my mood too. Finally, I try to remind myself that anxiety (or guilt, which is another one I deal with often) are basically useless emotions. If there is something I can actually do to make the situation better, I take steps towards it, otherwise I try to remind myself that worrying doesn't really help anything and could actually be making things worse. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worrying-coping-mechanisms#post-2710312 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 15:26:26 +0000 IRunForFun 2710312@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@babycanuck: Is there any way your DH can take an overnight at least one weekend night so you can get some solid sleep? I'm like @gingerbebe: in that my anxiety is so much worse when I'm sleep deprived. We have a 7-week old so sleep deprivation is pretty much unavoidable but my DH has been handling overnights on Saturdays so I can sleep a few solid stretches. It's not perfect but it helps to get just a little bit on top of the anxiety. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worrying-coping-mechanisms#post-2710305 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 15:20:25 +0000 babycanuck 2710305@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@autumnleaves: Unfortunately not. He works in a high risk job and I have always taken on the MOTN wakings because if he's not well rested then he is literally putting him life on the line at work. I'm very much like Gingerbebe in mindset. I am going to take the suggestions of everyone on here and get started on bettering myself, as best as I can. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worrying-coping-mechanisms#post-2710300 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 15:12:07 +0000 autumnleaves 2710300@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Is your husband able to help with the middle of the night wakenings?<br /> I agree with PP - sleep is the biggest factor for me and exercise also helps tremendously.<br /> I started going to an exercise class in the early AM because I couldn't sleep and I felt like it ended up being a win because I am starting my day taking care of myself - I may not be able to sleep but at least I can get a good workout and feel good about that.<br /> I try to tell myself there is no good that comes out of worrying - it's wasted energy and honestly reminding myself of this helps me at times.<br /> Good luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worrying-coping-mechanisms#post-2710280 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 14:54:28 +0000 gingerbebe 2710280@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have a history of mild depression and anxiety and had PPA/PPD with both my kids and I can tell you that nothing affects my anxiety and worrying more than lack of sleep and rest. I am on Zoloft for my current baby but nothing helps the anxiety and worrying better than sleep.</p> <p>I was in ICU for 3 weeks after a serious surgery and the inability to get solid sleep with all the nurses and beeps and people coming in and out literally gave what they termed ICU psychosis. I was out of my mind scared constantly and freaking out. My first son was colicky and had reflux and the sleep deprivation almost killed me too. Even when DH would take over so I could sleep I would be paralyzed by worries and thoughts and I just couldn't sleep.</p> <p>We have made a lot of adjustments to our life to ensure I get adequate rest. Our boys were sleeptrained, my husband literally makes me take a nap if I didn't get enough sleep the night before. I listen to rain noises and take melatonin and wear an eye mask so I get the most restful sleep possible. </p> <p>I tell my husband my worries - sometimes getting them out verbally makes me realize I'm being ridiculous. I also spend quite a lot of time praying and inviting God into my worries. It's funny but it's like I literally conference Jesus into a call with me and my worries and say "this is above my pay grade - you're upper management, handle it." </p> <p>I've also just acknowledged worrying is a side effect of how my brain works. I'm a very detail oriented person who can work through several different permutations of a single scenario at once. I'm a planner, I'm a logistics-type person, and I'm someone who naturally anticipates needs. A natural consequence to that is that I can foresee weird outcomes or possibilities many people can't or don't. So I end up worrying more about things than other people. And that's okay. Because most of the time my ability to plan and multitask is a strength. Acknowledging that makes me think more positively about myself. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worrying-coping-mechanisms#post-2710208 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 12:49:56 +0000 PawPrints 2710208@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If I'm worried about something specific, I google anecdotes from people who had a much harder experience than I'm having, and that helps me feel a lot better. (I was worried about DD's crib-to-bed transition; now I can't stop laughing at stories about other people's LOs spending the night sleeping on top of the fridge and then toddlers removing their nursery doors from the hinges). For ongoing anxiety, definitely a psychiatrist and medication and exercise can help a lot. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worrying-coping-mechanisms#post-2710201 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 12:37:37 +0000 psw27 2710201@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I sit and write a stream of consciousness about why I'm worried and what I can do to relieve the anxiety. I also try to close my eyes and do a lot of deepbreathing. When anxious or worrisome thoughts enter I acknowledge them and picture then floating away. Sort of sounds cheesey but it helps me. I also made a joke that I gave up worry for Lent, but its seemed to help me say nope I'm not going down that path! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worrying-coping-mechanisms#post-2710196 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 12:31:57 +0000 MrsTal 2710196@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I started meds and see a therapist as well. My therapist encouraged me to start meditating when I can, and it's helped tremendously. I just downloaded the app called Calm and it's been amazing, it has just a breath mode where you can just take a few minutes to focus on breathing and get out of your head. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worrying-coping-mechanisms#post-2710189 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 12:25:14 +0000 Tanjowen 2710189@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I make lists upon lists. And crossing off things from the list, no matter how trivial it seems, is very soothing to me. And make a point to go for a walk if possible every day to get outside. </p> <p>And if anxiety gets really bad, I take 5HTP, which is a vitamin that helps me a lot. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worrying-coping-mechanisms#post-2710166 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 11:40:00 +0000 sarac 2710166@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If you suspect that exercise would help, I would greatly encourage you to get it, however you can. My anxiety goes through the roof when I don't get regular medium intensity exercise. Can you get a treadmill or an exercise bike? Can you do a 7 minute workout app or some youtube exercise videos? Literally anything. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worrying-coping-mechanisms#post-2710163 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 11:37:09 +0000 wrkbrk 2710163@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yup, this is me too. I have tried GABA pills (supplement available OTC at Target) and maybe it's a placebo effect but I feel calmer! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worrying-coping-mechanisms#post-2710067 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 10:03:07 +0000 youboots 2710067@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I see a therapist which helps. My dr have me a term it's called ruminating. For some reason having a name for it helped- it's bigger than worry. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worrying-coping-mechanisms#post-2710052 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 09:54:03 +0000 Mrs. Carrot 2710052@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@hellobeeboston: Gah, I'm sorry. It's called "Hardwiring Happiness" by Rick Hanson. I've read "Better than Before" as well, and that too is good, but not along the worry lines. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worrying-coping-mechanisms#post-2710045 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 09:47:11 +0000 hellobeeboston 2710045@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Carrot: "Better than Before" or "Happier" --- i was just trying to find the book but couldn't find a "Happier than Before" title!</p> <p>following as I find i am turning into more of a worrier every year I get older, and two kids isn't helping! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worrying-coping-mechanisms#post-2710027 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 09:26:12 +0000 Greentea 2710027@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I read somewhere to remind yourself not to worry or you will miss out on a world that DOES exist. It is a simple, but good reminder.</p> <p>Try connecting to your "right brain," you can draw, play an instrument, or do a meditation like thinking of yourself like a whale floating through the ocean and you are beautiful, or stare in soft focus where you take in as much as you can, even in your peripheral vision. These mediations connect you to the moment and sort of reset you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worrying-coping-mechanisms#post-2710009 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 09:02:12 +0000 MRSJX3 2710009@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm a huge worrier and struggle with anxiety. Something that helps me is to ask myself what the worst thing that can happen is. And if that happens, what will it look like? What will need to be done? </p> <p>Another strategy is to ask myself "in ten years, will this matter?" </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worrying-coping-mechanisms#post-2710008 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 08:57:46 +0000 IRunForFun 2710008@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've been really struggling with my anxiety postpartum and one thing I've been trying to do when I find myself dwelling on the negative or the "what ifs" is start listing anything positive I can think of in my head. It helps a little bit. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worrying-coping-mechanisms#post-2710006 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 08:55:45 +0000 Mrs. Carrot 2710006@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I struggle with this a lot. About a year ago I read "Happier than Before" which seriously changed my life. I still worry, don't get me wrong, but the book really helped me figure out how to do more to focus on the positive, differentiate what I can control and what I can't, etc. Mindfulness helps to an extent as well - my therapist taught me a trick when I feel anxiety coming on to find a quiet space, close my eyes, put one hand on my heart and one on my belly, and take deep breaths while in your head observing the worries. I usually talk to myself in my head - what am I worried about right now? What are the good things here? What are the bad things?. Something about that specific hand placement and deep breathing together is a magic combo. </p> <p>I know this can sound a little hokey, but it has all really helped me. It's not a foolproof solution, but a good start. Good luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worrying-coping-mechanisms#post-2709963 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 08:02:38 +0000 babycanuck 2709963@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hey bees, LTNS.</p> <p>Besides working out, can anyone share their coping mechanisms for worrying?</p> <p>I am a huge worrywart. I expect to worry about my LO, but I'm constantly worrying that I'm not doing well enough at work, amongst other constant worries about general things in life. I have always been a worrier but it seems to have gotten out of control. I will be speaking to my GP about it (as I am on medication for anxiety) but I don't know what to do now. I am hoping that once the snow is gone I will be able to go out walking more with LO and I think that will help, I just desperately need to "give myself a break" and learn to relax.</p> <p>Edit: To add, my LO still at 17 months is not sleeping through the night...so the exhaustion is not helping. I'm working on getting him to sleep without looking for me, but we aren't there yet. </p>