https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 13 May 2026 01:40:59 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worst-part-about-being-unemployed#post-269317 Fri, 24 Aug 2012 08:09:37 +0000 Mrs. Lovejoy 269317@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@purrpletulips: completely agree. DH lost his job in April, the day before Easter weekend and it was sudden and unexpected. He'd been receiving stellar reviews and the company was doing well. The hit to his confidence is what worries me the most. I do all I can to support him and show him how valuable he is. It's hard though. Just plain hard. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worst-part-about-being-unemployed#post-266951 Wed, 22 Aug 2012 16:32:45 +0000 jedeve 266951@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Yoyo: Yes!! I hate those. They take forever. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worst-part-about-being-unemployed#post-266777 Wed, 22 Aug 2012 14:35:29 +0000 purrpletulips 266777@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have been fortunate enough not to find myself unemployed but DH has and my biggest pet peeve from that side is the HUGE hit to his confidence. He was unexpectedly let go from his job exactly one week before DD was due and it took him almost two years to find a permanent position. Now we are 3 1/2 weeks from LO#2's due date and the insecurities have returned because he's afraid he'll find himself suddenly unemployed again (compounded by his company's annual reviews occurring in September). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worst-part-about-being-unemployed#post-266742 Wed, 22 Aug 2012 14:04:42 +0000 Mrs. Yoyo 266742@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My job-search-related pet peeve right now is having to fill out online forms with my entire career history and the like. This is why we have resumes, no? Such a giant time suck. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worst-part-about-being-unemployed#post-266631 Wed, 22 Aug 2012 13:02:08 +0000 mrbee 266631@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@jedeve: Not sure if this helps, but the salary savings of an unpaid leave are typically dwarfed by the cost of not having someone to do the job in those few months... and the uncertainty around if the person is coming back.</p> <p>If childcare was affordable and govt helped with hiring costs, I think you'd see a lot more pregnant women and moms happily employed! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worst-part-about-being-unemployed#post-266611 Wed, 22 Aug 2012 12:51:36 +0000 DigAPony 266611@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It really sucks that so many of us are going through this / have been through this, but it's good to know I'm not alone.</p> <p>Another pet peeve of mine is getting rejected for being overqualified. Before grad school I was desperate, applying for anything and everything, and I got rejected from Merry Maids because I had a Bachelors. I should have just left my degree off of my application, but come on! I need money! I can clean houses, I swear! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worst-part-about-being-unemployed#post-266593 Wed, 22 Aug 2012 12:40:08 +0000 Lozza 266593@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee:<br /> " I personally think we need govt funded maternity leave and subsidized child care... or it will be tough for the situation to get better!"</p> <p>Amen to that, sir. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worst-part-about-being-unemployed#post-266588 Wed, 22 Aug 2012 12:38:05 +0000 jedeve 266588@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ooh, another thing that annoys me - listening to BS reasons people don't get hired. I was at a dinner with my husband's boss the other day. She said she threw out all cover letters that began with "I'm a rising third year law student" because thought you should just say "I'm a third year law student," even if it was over the summer. I'm sure it's a real indicator of job performance....*rolls eyes*</p> <p>@mrbee: Oh agree! Most of the jobs I'm looking for are with the government, so it's all a wash to me. I was just coming from the mindset of "you don't even have to pay me! Just don't fire me/not hire me because I have a baby due and need time off for that!"</p> <p>Does anyone else get all break-up-y when you don't get hired/get fired? And think "I hope the person they hire instead is terrible and quits within a month and they just think about what could have been!" </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worst-part-about-being-unemployed#post-266529 Wed, 22 Aug 2012 11:48:34 +0000 mrbee 266529@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@jedeve: I personally think we need govt funded maternity leave and subsidized child care... or it will be tough for the situation to get better! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worst-part-about-being-unemployed#post-266523 Wed, 22 Aug 2012 11:44:32 +0000 mrs. wagon 266523@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was laid off by my company after a year of trying to move around within the company because I knew my position was expendable. HR avoided me for an entire year and strung me along, never did anything for me and then they eventually cut me loose. I was totally heartbroken because I not only loved the company and the work they did, but I absolutely loved my coworkers. We were like a huge family. The day they laid me off I went around saying bye to everyone and I was hysterically crying. It was awful. </p> <p>It was the first time since I was a young teen that I was not receiving a regular paycheck and contributing to the finances of my own life.</p> <p>I was able to get a good amount of unemployment because of the awful severance they gave me (1 week! ahhhh!!!) and I had someone say to me, "I hate working... you're so lucky, I wish I would get fired or laid off so I could claim unemployment." I was so mad. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worst-part-about-being-unemployed#post-266522 Wed, 22 Aug 2012 11:44:13 +0000 jedeve 266522@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee: It's tough on me, too, though. I get that you should have exemptions for small businesses, but no potential for maternity leave can make finding a job when you're pregnant nearly impossible. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worst-part-about-being-unemployed#post-266521 Wed, 22 Aug 2012 11:41:44 +0000 mrbee 266521@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@jedeve: unpaid leave can still be tough on a business owner? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worst-part-about-being-unemployed#post-266505 Wed, 22 Aug 2012 11:34:25 +0000 jedeve 266505@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Other things I hate: </p> <p>- Vague job descriptions</p> <p>- "Salary is competitive" - WTF does that mean?? All I can assume is "above minimum wage."</p> <p>- That you have to work for so long at a place before you can get maternity leave. Are we really that worried about women getting jobs just for the maternity leave? And why not let them qualified for unpaid leave; that doesn't hurt anyone. Why can't we assume pregnant women might want a job...just because they want a job???!!!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worst-part-about-being-unemployed#post-266372 Wed, 22 Aug 2012 09:58:24 +0000 Cole 266372@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I hated when people tried to "fix" it-- have you cut cable yet? Well, considering we didn't even have a tv when I did have a job, yes. What about going into X field they are always hiring-- um, I am not qualified and I would be awful at it, or they pay is so bad, and the commute is so long it is literally not worth it financially! </p> <p>@ali I always felt guilty if I wasn't living up to "perfect housewife" status too, like the house needed to be spotless and a perfect dinner on the table. My husband didn't see it that way thankfully (although he really like the dinner part) and knew that applying takes a long time and also that the process is demoralizing and some days you are just in a funk.</p> <p>@jedeve good luck to you, it certainly isn't a fun journey but here's hoping it all works out for you in the end! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worst-part-about-being-unemployed#post-266333 Wed, 22 Aug 2012 09:25:48 +0000 hilsy85 266333@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yup I HATED that when I was looking for work last summer. Or the people who had unrealistic suggestions. Like my dad, who kept urging me to apply to the FBI... o_O whaa? I also felt like such a loser because I literally applied to over 200 jobs (I counted!) and got a million rejections. Hang in there! Fingers crossed you find something. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worst-part-about-being-unemployed#post-266329 Wed, 22 Aug 2012 09:23:59 +0000 Mrs. Yoyo 266329@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@DigAPony: "Nothing has wrecked my confidence or self esteem like being unemployed has. I feel incredibly guilty because my depression is really paralyzing, and I'm not being a very good wife right now."</p> <p>This in a nutshell! I am a SAHM right now while I'm in between jobs, but I never realized how demoralizing looking for work would be right now. I have OK days, and then I have really low days. It's a vicious cycle. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worst-part-about-being-unemployed#post-266325 Wed, 22 Aug 2012 09:19:44 +0000 jedeve 266325@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oh, the guilt/depression/lack of confidence is definitely the worse. I used to work with homeless people and other people would always tell me stuff like "they don't want jobs, they just want government paychecks." NO! People *want* to work!</p> <p>I might have some new leads. But if I had a quarter for every "lead" I've had, I wouldn't need to work! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worst-part-about-being-unemployed#post-266172 Wed, 22 Aug 2012 02:43:01 +0000 DigAPony 266172@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I feel your pain! I was unemployed from June 2009 - September 2010 when I started grad school. Now I've finished grad school and am job hunting again. Nothing has wrecked my confidence or self esteem like being unemployed has. I feel incredibly guilty because my depression is really paralyzing, and I'm not being a very good wife right now.</p> <p>I think the worst part this time, besides constant stress and anxiety about money, is that if I don't have a job by the fall then we'll have to push back our TTC timeline, which is heartbreaking! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worst-part-about-being-unemployed#post-266168 Wed, 22 Aug 2012 02:23:42 +0000 Cherrybee 266168@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For me: </p> <p>1) The loss of confidence (bordering on fear of going outside by the end of it). I was only out of work for 3 months but it look me a year to feel like myself again once I was back in work. </p> <p>2) The guilt. I'd walked out of my previous job (I was being bullied) and, as the weeks out of work rolled on, our savings were getting lower and lower and I just knew that my partner (now my husband) was getting more and more worried. Despite spending day after day applying for jobs non-stop, I still felt guilty if the house wasn't spotless when he came in from work. </p> <p>Happy ending though - I sued my previous employer and we got all our savings back! We used it to pay for our wedding! </p> <p>3) Claiming welfare. I'm sure it was the lowest part of my life to date. They treat you like dirt. I had worked for 10 years for the same company before moving to a new company (where the bulling happened) but still they spoke to me as if I didn't want to work! </p> <p>@Jedeve: Hugs. xx </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worst-part-about-being-unemployed#post-265984 Tue, 21 Aug 2012 18:32:45 +0000 autumnlove 265984@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've never been unemployed but my brother hated hearing advice to just get a job already or maybe you shouldn't be so picky.</p> <p>Good luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worst-part-about-being-unemployed#post-265983 Tue, 21 Aug 2012 18:31:19 +0000 Shutterbug 265983@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ugh! I hated the side eyes or rude comments when I spent any money. Like, "oh, you just bought those shoes? How's the job search going?" (which really meant "I'm paying for your shopping habit? Get a job, you deadbeat!") Umm... DH is still employed and we're doing just fine, thank you. MYOB! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/worst-part-about-being-unemployed#post-265978 Tue, 21 Aug 2012 18:22:53 +0000 jedeve 265978@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>The advice! I hate how people are always trying to offer me advice. I'm looking for work in public health and all anyone says is "have you thought about applying with the state?" YES I'VE THOUGHT ABOUT THE PUBLIC HEALTH DEPARTMENT. </p> <p>Also annoying pieces of advice are to "follow up with people," "just get a job," "try a temp agency," (done, trying, and done) and "volunteer somewhere first." (The volunteer one is annoying because the baby is due in 5 months - not enough time to volunteer and then get hired!)</p> <p>Thirdly annoying is everyone's stories about that person who they knew who got a job 8 months pregnant. Because that person didn't work for the state who cannot budge on it's maternity leave requirements, and so I can't get maternity leave at this point, and since I don't want to leave a 2 day old newborn at home - I can't find a job with the one place that hires people in my profession! </p> <p>What's your least favorite part about unemployment? </p>