https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 17 Apr 2026 02:13:27 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass/page/2#post-2558341 Fri, 27 May 2016 15:09:36 +0000 Mrs. D 2558341@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I said no, but he can cheat on me with Shania Twain, and I can cheat on him with Nathan Fillion, lol. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass/page/2#post-2527195 Sun, 17 Apr 2016 18:34:49 +0000 Ms maths 2527195@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Neither my husband or I would have any interest in this (probably for different reasons), so I can't even imagine it well enough to know how I would feel about it if my husband was interested.</p> <p>We have some very good friends who are polyamorous: two couples who all have a romantic relationship with the people of the opposite gender in the group (so each person has two relationships.) I found it unusual when I first met them, but they are some of the kindest people I know and really wonderful friends, so I got over myself. I have no idea how they came to be in the situation they are in, but they've been together for many, many years and their relationships are very loving. They also seem to have different relationships with each partner, so I can definitely see how they find each relationship fulfilling in different ways. </p> <p>A "hall pass" seems more off-putting to me, because I would expect it's kind of about escaping your life. But if others find it a useful or enjoyable thing in their relationship, go for it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass/page/2#post-2527098 Sun, 17 Apr 2016 14:10:33 +0000 erinpye 2527098@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Didn't they also say this would really only work for 2-3% of couples? DH told me all about it, mocking the ridiculousness, and I agree with him. That's a big no for us. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass/page/2#post-2527002 Sun, 17 Apr 2016 09:39:15 +0000 nana87 2527002@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Personally, no. That would make both dh and I super uncomfortable.</p> <p>Theoretically, I understand that sex and love don't have to be the same thing, so I do respect that this does work for people. I worry that the judgmental tone of some of these responses (saying things like "why even be married") may keep people who might be in or be interested in non-exclusive relationships from posting. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass/page/2#post-2526941 Sun, 17 Apr 2016 03:55:14 +0000 SugarplumsMom 2526941@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't understand why anyone would even be in a relationship if that was an option. It's so odd. Then again, I don't understand people in an open marriage. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass/page/2#post-2526825 Sat, 16 Apr 2016 17:42:45 +0000 Happygal 2526825@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No. Not a good idea. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass/page/2#post-2526771 Sat, 16 Apr 2016 14:46:39 +0000 caterw 2526771@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Big fat NO. When we got married, my husband and I took vows to forsake all others and we take that pretty seriously. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass/page/2#post-2526748 Sat, 16 Apr 2016 13:28:00 +0000 hb3233 2526748@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I saw this and was like "what's a hall pass?" Lol, the only time I've ever heard this term used was in junior high, when we needed a literal hall pass to go somewhere during class :silly: </p> <p>I don't want an open marriage - for a lot of different reasons (the emotional issues, the health risks, etc). But I don't particularly care if others do, if it works for them and everyone involved is a consenting adult. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass/page/2#post-2526556 Sat, 16 Apr 2016 00:02:55 +0000 LindsayLou 2526556@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It would not work for me, or for my marriage. But, I do not judge what might work for other people. One of my oldest friends is poly amorous, is married and also has a boyfriend, who also is in a relationship with her husband. It works for them. I don't understand it, I would never do it. But if she's happy, I'm good with it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass/page/2#post-2526547 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 23:18:22 +0000 loveisstrange 2526547@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>There are a lot of things I'm okay with. I don't care about porn, or strippers, or him checking out other women. When I was younger and didn't have a kid, I think I could have comfortably lived in a polyamorous relationship. Shit, I've even been in a situation where I had a threesome (not with DH. With an ex girlfriend). </p> <p>But a hall pass? HELL no. I'm not giving him a pass to go fuck some random chick and bring home god knows what STD..... Well..... I mean, unless I get one too, minus the STD. :silly: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass/page/2#post-2526399 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 18:02:43 +0000 BSB 2526399@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nope, not for us. If there are people who have an open relationship, great for them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass/page/2#post-2526396 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 17:55:25 +0000 ShootingStar 2526396@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Definitely not for us. DH would never even want to. My brother's wife is polyamorous (has a secondary relationship) and DH always rants about what's the point of marriage if you're not intending to be faithful. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass/page/2#post-2526376 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 17:28:53 +0000 Eko 2526376@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have a good friend that allowed this for her husband. She agreed to it because it was supposed to be a one time thing with no emotional attachment and then she found out he was maintaining a secret relationship with that person. They tried to work it out, but ultimately got divorced. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass/page/2#post-2526254 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 15:22:15 +0000 regberadaisy 2526254@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@kiddosc: hey kudos to them. But I would be insanely jealous too! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass/page/2#post-2526253 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 15:19:43 +0000 kiddosc 2526253@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@regberadaisy: she is a girlfriend to both of them. :wink: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass/page/2#post-2526240 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 15:09:55 +0000 regberadaisy 2526240@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <br /><p><i>This comment has been deleted by the original poster.</i></p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass/page/2#post-2526238 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 15:08:49 +0000 regberadaisy 2526238@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@kiddosc: 😮 How does *that* all work!! Is it a mutual girlfriend or just for the husband? Is it like polygamy then but without the marriage? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass/page/2#post-2526236 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 15:07:47 +0000 kiddosc 2526236@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's not for me, I would be insanely jealous. Infidelity is pretty much the only unforgivable in our relationship. </p> <p>I'm friends with a married couple that have a live in girlfriend though. It works for the three of them, so who am I to judge. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass#post-2526231 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 15:01:42 +0000 birdofafeather 2526231@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nope. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass#post-2526138 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 14:01:46 +0000 Autumnmama79 2526138@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No, even the thought makes me feel physically sick </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass#post-2526042 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 12:16:09 +0000 NavyRN2012 2526042@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hell no. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass#post-2526037 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 12:11:23 +0000 travellingbee 2526037@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nope. Not for us at all. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass#post-2526015 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 11:45:21 +0000 sarac 2526015@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think this maaaaaaaay be the wrong audience for this kind of question. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass#post-2525999 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 11:34:27 +0000 Torchwood 2525999@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Probably. We've discussed an open relationship several times. We just couldn't figure the logistics well enough. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass#post-2525994 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 11:32:44 +0000 Finfan 2525994@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wouldn't but I have no interest in what other people do in their relationships as long as everyone consents and it's legal. I believe in minding my own business. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass#post-2525973 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 11:15:38 +0000 lovehoneybee 2525973@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Honestly, he's too lazy to put in the effort for someone else, so it's really a moot point. But I don't personally think I could be okay with it anyway. I already have too many body and sex-related issues, and I don't think I could stop myself from obsessively thinking about it/comparing myself. But who knows how I might feel about it 20 years from now, so no judgment...whatever works for your relationship! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass#post-2525966 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 11:09:49 +0000 JenGirl 2525966@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't think I could get on board with a free "hall pass" but I could, possibly, see some situations that I could be okay with him having sex with someone else. Like, if I were to develop some sort of medical concern where I couldn't/didn't want to have sex permanently or for a very extended period of time. That would be really hard on my husband and I could see us having a conversation about being okay with him having sex with someone else under very specific conditions. Honestly, I'd probably prefer a sex worker or someone who was in a similar situation but in a stable relationship. I don't think either of us would particularly like that situation, but, if it would save our marriage and make it so my husband didn't resent me, I'd try to be okay with it. </p> <p>Overall, I expect that my husband and I will be monogamous with each other for the rest of our lives, but I try not to completely close myself off to other possibilities if some unusual situation were to arise. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass#post-2525963 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 11:07:02 +0000 mrsjd 2525963@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Amorini: Sure thing! DH has an awful temper at time and is super impatient and easily frustrated. But yes, solid to the core is a great way to describe it. Completely trustworthy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass#post-2525961 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 11:06:18 +0000 winniebee 2525961@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I couldn't. I would never get over it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-ever-give-your-spouse-a-hall-pass#post-2525955 Fri, 15 Apr 2016 10:59:10 +0000 Amorini 2525955@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrsjd: My DH is the same way. Just solid to the core. Lots of other defects (like me!), but I'm glad the "wandering eye" is not one of them.</p> <p>Every open marriage or relationship that I have ever known--and I'm surprised to say that I've known more than one--has fallen apart in a blaze of glory. I just don't think the "hall pass" concept fundamentally works for homo sapiens. </p>