https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 10 Jul 2026 05:49:03 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-give-up-other-parenting-plans-if-you-suddenly-got-pregnant#post-919971 Wed, 10 Jul 2013 14:27:13 +0000 Foodnerd81 919971@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>There are too many dependents to say for sure now, but like @Mrsbells: if I was adopting because I couldn't carry a biological child, I would have feelings like I was being selfish by 'keeping' two, if that makes any sense. But I also think if I had been matched already, I'd be way too far into the process to want to back out. Probably I would take Mrs. Jacks approach and once I was a certain way into the process (matched with a baby or birth mom) I'd make extra sure it didn't happen. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-give-up-other-parenting-plans-if-you-suddenly-got-pregnant#post-919965 Wed, 10 Jul 2013 14:25:23 +0000 regberadaisy 919965@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If there were no children already in works then I would pause. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-give-up-other-parenting-plans-if-you-suddenly-got-pregnant#post-919961 Wed, 10 Jul 2013 14:23:46 +0000 MsLipGloss 919961@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes, I would put them on hold! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-give-up-other-parenting-plans-if-you-suddenly-got-pregnant#post-919943 Wed, 10 Jul 2013 14:17:28 +0000 heffalump 919943@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think it would depend on finances first, we can only afford to take care of a certain amount of kids. And it would depend on how many kids we already have. I get migraines so DH is often a solo parent on the weekends. Tons of babies would be hard on him. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-give-up-other-parenting-plans-if-you-suddenly-got-pregnant#post-919524 Wed, 10 Jul 2013 12:49:14 +0000 cmomma17 919524@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mediagirl: I have heard that some agencies have rules regarding this. Like they will not adopt/foster out to an expecting couple. I think the rationale is that they want the adopted/fostered child to receive 100% of the parents attention.</p> <p>I'm not sure what I'd do! I think it would be very hard to just stop the adoption/foster process. You have your heart invested in that I assume, and from what I understand it is so much work! But knowing myself personally I get overwhelmed easily, so I don't know if I could handle both situations at once? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-give-up-other-parenting-plans-if-you-suddenly-got-pregnant#post-919507 Wed, 10 Jul 2013 12:43:36 +0000 Weagle 919507@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If it were adoption I would continue, assuming we wouldn't be breaking any state laws or agency restrictions. I would pause fostering. I would not foster an children that were older than my youngest adopted or biological child. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-give-up-other-parenting-plans-if-you-suddenly-got-pregnant#post-919284 Wed, 10 Jul 2013 11:33:47 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 919284@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@TurtleDoves: I also have grave concerns about when foster kids come into a home where there is a younger child. This happened to us when we were young and it wasn't pretty. The younger children were victims to the fosters. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-give-up-other-parenting-plans-if-you-suddenly-got-pregnant#post-919264 Wed, 10 Jul 2013 11:28:15 +0000 CupQuakeWalk 919264@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If it were adoption, I'd continue.<br /> If it were fostering, no. I'd stop. Fostering can a child of any age and is not a permanent situation. I would want that up/down with a newborn. I'd prefer "this is official, he is our child" rather than a child who doesn't belong to us forever and technically has another family. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-give-up-other-parenting-plans-if-you-suddenly-got-pregnant#post-919253 Wed, 10 Jul 2013 11:24:27 +0000 Mrsbells 919253@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It depends on my reason for adopting and also how far along we were in the adoption process. But if I was adopting solely because I couldnt have a child of my own and suddenly did have my own I think I would feel strongly about the adopted baby going to someone who "wants/needs" the baby more than me now that I have my own baby on the way. I dont know if thats wrong </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-give-up-other-parenting-plans-if-you-suddenly-got-pregnant#post-919251 Wed, 10 Jul 2013 11:23:39 +0000 Mrs. Polish 919251@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would not give up what we were already pursuing. I take the approach that if there is a baby meant for me I need to be open to all possibilities. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-give-up-other-parenting-plans-if-you-suddenly-got-pregnant#post-919230 Wed, 10 Jul 2013 11:17:35 +0000 mrs. wagon 919230@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think of Mrs. Train when I hear this question!!! </p> <p>I have no idea what I would do! I'd probably continue depending on where I was in the process. If we were matched I don't think I could stop. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-give-up-other-parenting-plans-if-you-suddenly-got-pregnant#post-919226 Wed, 10 Jul 2013 11:17:04 +0000 anonysquire 919226@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mediagirl: just probably strange for first time parents wanting to foster and adopt who just got pregnant to keep doing it. We just want a ton of kids. 6, 8, 100! Anyways we are still becoming certified to foster hopefully this next month, and still finishing up our adoption home study. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-give-up-other-parenting-plans-if-you-suddenly-got-pregnant#post-919219 Wed, 10 Jul 2013 11:15:41 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 919219@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We would proceed with both. We were also very careful during he adoption process and he year after to make sure we didn't get into that situation. One of my siblings did, and it worked out just fine (even though there was a completely crazy period of time!) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-give-up-other-parenting-plans-if-you-suddenly-got-pregnant#post-919216 Wed, 10 Jul 2013 11:15:23 +0000 looch 919216@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No, we wouldn't stop, because I am a pessimist and would always have those "what if" scenarios running through my head, like "what if I miscarried because i stopped the adoption process." Not logical, I know, but it's the truth. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-give-up-other-parenting-plans-if-you-suddenly-got-pregnant#post-919213 Wed, 10 Jul 2013 11:13:51 +0000 mediagirl 919213@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@anonysquire: what are your plans and why is it strange? I think it's wonderful! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-give-up-other-parenting-plans-if-you-suddenly-got-pregnant#post-919209 Wed, 10 Jul 2013 11:12:52 +0000 anonysquire 919209@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm in this situation now and we are not stopping. Strange I know. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-give-up-other-parenting-plans-if-you-suddenly-got-pregnant#post-919204 Wed, 10 Jul 2013 11:10:34 +0000 mediagirl 919204@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If you weren't sure you could get pregnant and went through the steps to start the adoption process or foster parent process, would you stop those if you got a surprise or long awaited BFP?</p> <p>I haven't been in this situation so I can't answer other than to say, I don't know what we would do. I would hope if we felt strongly about adopting or fostering (or both) we would continue on that journey and enjoy our added blessing, as well!</p> <p>What would you do? </p>