https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 30 Jun 2026 19:10:53 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground/page/2#post-2198280 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 19:47:34 +0000 Pepper 2198280@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would be hesitant to help a child up on a structure without the okay from their parent. I've helped many kids down from monkey bars though! Probably because I'm the mom who stands near her 23 month old when he plays, haha. I also climb up on the high structures with him. If I waited until he was old enough to not get shoved down by other kids or trip and fall off of a jungle gym that's taller than I am, he wouldn't be playing until he was much, much older. I think it's important for kids to learn skills like climbing, how to use a slide properly, and general playground etiquette and safety at a young age. My own kid learns better when I am there to explain things to him. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground/page/2#post-2198243 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 18:43:33 +0000 Mrs. Oatmeal 2198243@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wouldn't help with the monkey bars, but I'd give a push on the swing, or help a kid get down from somewhere. I'd probably ask them to ask their parents though. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground/page/2#post-2198227 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 18:21:55 +0000 mrsrugbee 2198227@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@travellingbee: I think you may have misunderstood me. My issue is with adults getting physically inside that play structure I showed. I have no problem with spotters, even ones that get right up in there but I've seen women spend an hour INSIDE that jungle gym. That makes no sense and leaves no room for the actual toddlers to play. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground/page/2#post-2198210 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 17:50:10 +0000 pinkcupcake 2198210@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No, I don't feel comfortable helping other kids - I would tell them to go ask their mom or dad for help. </p> <p>As for parents who stay near their child on a play structure- I am one of those! I stick close to my 3 year old , especially if she is climbing something high. For many reasons - 1) I like playing with her on a playground! I'm not one to sit on the side just watching or playing with my phone. I like to actively play with my kid at the playground; 2) there is typically a ton of rough housing at our local playground. The smaller play structure is for kids ages 3-5, but I swear I always see huge kids running around, trampling on the little ones. I don't know how many times my petite 3 year old got knocked over. It's not a matter of her holding her own or anything - she's just physically smaller and one push or shove (whether it's intentional or not) can knock her off the structure. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground/page/2#post-2198209 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 17:49:49 +0000 FannyMae 2198209@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm a selfish cow. I have to lift 20kg of my own kid up onto things, I'm not lifting a stranger kid too. I'd say "you better ask your adult for help". </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground/page/2#post-2198191 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 17:00:16 +0000 hellobeeboston 2198191@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yea, what @mrbee: said </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground#post-2198180 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 16:46:48 +0000 Greentea 2198180@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>"Is your family here? I think you should ask them because they know you best." I'd probably say something like that? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground#post-2198176 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 16:40:17 +0000 travellingbee 2198176@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This always makes me uncomfortable. I try not to, especially in situations like that.<br /> Regarding the parents helping their kids...<br /> Kids need a gradual release of support to learn. I want my LO to be safe in the least restrictive but safe situation. When he was 12 months and wanted to explore the gym id go up with him and support him. When he was 18 months Id usually stand on the ground and follow him to help remind him of the dangerous parts. Now at 2, I just stay nearby and watch him as he's very independent. This feels most comfortable for me and I am not, by any means overprotective. My son gets to do a lot of safe risk taking. @mrsrugbee: to say that parents don't belong there doesn't seem particularly respectful of other parenting styles. Maybe you prefer it that way, but not every kid has the self-preservation instincts that you say your daughter had. We're all just doing what we think is right for our own kid. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground#post-2198147 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 15:58:01 +0000 Maysprout 2198147@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrsrugbee: your experience of not seeing jostling or pushing on the playground doesn't mean others are lying or perpetuating an urban myth of it happening. I agree with giving kids a chance to explore but it seems like you have a narrow experience of a small no pushing playground to make sweeping judgements about playground safety. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground#post-2198133 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 15:38:29 +0000 WinterBee 2198133@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@aprild: I would tell him that he needs to ask his mommy or daddy to help, or ask his mommy or daddy if I can help them, then introduce myself to his parent(s) if we went that route.<br /> I would not feel comfortable touching someone's kid without their permission. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground#post-2198082 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 14:54:55 +0000 mrsrugbee 2198082@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Anagram: @daniellemybelle: this video happens to be on a day that it's empty but she has since been in there several times when preschools were there. On one occasion that structure contained a literal DOZEN 4-6year olds. In my experience kids don't shove eachother. DD's intereractions with older childen have always been neutral or if anything, they take it upon themselves to help her.</p> <p>I guess I give kids a lot of credit... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground#post-2198033 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 14:18:52 +0000 travelgirl1 2198033@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would help for something like pushing a swing, but not for monkey bars. I fell off them as a kid and broke both wrists, so am wary of stuff like that with other people's kids. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground#post-2198009 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 13:57:26 +0000 Maysprout 2198009@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrsrugbee: she is very cute. But like others said there's no other kids and the main skill is climbing steps, there's not much of a risk of falling, unless she's never climbed steps before. We go to elementary school playgrounds where stuff is a bit bigger. I guess you could say they don't belong there when they're little but they've gained great skills by challenging themselves. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground#post-2197995 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 13:41:17 +0000 daniellemybelle 2197995@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrsrugbee: She's so cute :)</p> <p>Like @Anagram: said, most of the time there are other kids playing when we are at a playground. But we have a play set in our backyard that is not nearly as easy to climb up. Maybe I will take a picture later. LO cannot get back down completely on her own and I don't think she'd be able to until she was closer to 3 probably. If she fell she would break something. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground#post-2197973 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 13:28:09 +0000 Anagram 2197973@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrsrugbee: so the difference between your park and my parks (in an urban neighborhood), is that there would literally be about 50 kids running around, of all ages, knocking younger kiddos like yours down. Even the daycare centers bring their kids to our parks, because in our city, they do not have outdoor space. The local Pre-K program brings their kids, too. </p> <p>This is why 98% of parents of toddlers in my neighborhood stick with their kiddos--it's necessary. And no one minds it here--it's expected. People would worry about the toddler getting knocked down if their parent wasn't nearby. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground#post-2197972 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 13:25:43 +0000 looch 2197972@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrsrugbee: no problem. My son is 4, he doesn't want to go down with me anyway! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground#post-2197970 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 13:24:45 +0000 mrsrugbee 2197970@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@looch: I misunderstood, sorry. I really imagined your tumbles down the slide happening in tandem. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground#post-2197962 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 13:21:51 +0000 looch 2197962@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrsrugbee: who said I was going down at the same time, or with my child on my lap? I am fully aware that's a big no-no.</p> <p>I use my judgement. If there are a ton of kids, I stay off, but some of the kids on those structures are bigger than I am! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground#post-2197960 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 13:19:27 +0000 mrsrugbee 2197960@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@daniellemybelle: I just remind her to be careful when she gets close to gaps or tell her she can fall and that's it- she seems to have self I preservation drive. I feel like most places are self I explanatory to kids so she plays in them as designed.</p> <p>For reference, here she is at the park, going down the big slide for the first time. Thats probably about as nervous as I've ever been watching her. <a href="https://youtu.be/KwNpDFta7qA" rel="nofollow">https://youtu.be/KwNpDFta7qA</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground#post-2197957 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 13:18:14 +0000 Anagram 2197957@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've helped before. I guess it would depend on the situation. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground#post-2197939 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 13:09:35 +0000 JennyLayneAZ 2197939@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd also ask if his/her parent/guardian were around and go from there. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground#post-2197935 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 13:07:04 +0000 daniellemybelle 2197935@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrsrugbee: So, I am genuinely curious. Does your 16 month old climb up the jungle gym on their own with no assistance? How do they get down?</p> <p>I just don't understand how kids are supposed to learn how to manage the jungle gym if they don't have help. There is a learning curve. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground#post-2197933 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 13:06:13 +0000 Maysprout 2197933@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@2littlepumpkins: yup. And it's developmentally how it happens to learn to climb up before down. Id rather spot them while they explore and figure out how their body works than deal with the consequences of big falls. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground#post-2197905 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 12:44:40 +0000 2littlepumpkins 2197905@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Maysprout: ditto. Lo also can get stuck at certain places (only at this one park though.) good in theory to not help but especially if the park is crowded it's not practical for us.</p> <p>@looch: Lo asks us to go on the slide too especially those ones where there are two side by side slides. We don't go down with her on our laps and we don't get in the way of kids. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground#post-2197897 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 12:41:17 +0000 2littlepumpkins 2197897@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>In that scenario, no. I would encourage them to ask their parent/caregiver for help. There may be a reason the parents/caregivers aren't helping. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground#post-2197892 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 12:38:32 +0000 mrsrugbee 2197892@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@daniellemybelle: I repeat.. No grownups belong in the jungle gym. The swing is it's own thing but I wouldn't push a child old enough to propel themselves.</p> <p>@looch: I find adults going down with kids super terrifying. One of the most common playground hospitalisations is from adults snapping children's femurs and tibias going down the slide. Nope nope nope! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground#post-2197880 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 12:31:51 +0000 looch 2197880@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrsrugbee: oh, then you'd absolutely hate me! I love a good tumble down the slide! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground#post-2197878 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 12:31:21 +0000 Maysprout 2197878@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wouldn't unless I saw her doing them before or checked with the parents. </p> <p>@mrsrugbee: My kids at that age were super climbers but not quite as good at getting down or staying on their feet if a big kid comes running by while they're on a platform. that seems really dangerous at that age to expect them to climb down as well as they climb up and hold their own against other kids. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground#post-2197864 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 12:16:50 +0000 Ra 2197864@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm not sure if help with the monkey bars for safety reasons but I'd gladly help push on a swing, get down, catch a kid (younger) who I coming down the slide, etc. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-help-an-older-child-at-the-playground#post-2197846 Wed, 03 Jun 2015 12:03:47 +0000 daniellemybelle 2197846@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrsrugbee: Really? My daughter loves the playground but at 19 months she can't pump her legs on the swing. Should I not push her? And she can loves to climb up the rope ladder thing to get to the slide but she is still learning - she needs a spotter or she'll fall off and get hurt. How is she supposed to learn? </p>