https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 23 Apr 2026 03:28:08 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm/page/2#post-329316 Sun, 07 Oct 2012 16:29:46 +0000 Mrs. Superhero 329316@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm/page/2#post-329303 Sun, 07 Oct 2012 15:58:18 +0000 SAHM0811 329303@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree about not missing many firsts at daycare. To me if she did something exciting there, usually she was really close to doing it with me at home anyway. I wouldn't be sad I missed it... I'd just be excited she did it and I'd look forward to when I would first witness it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm/page/2#post-329248 Sun, 07 Oct 2012 14:14:24 +0000 mediagirl 329248@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't know. Being a SAHM is a LOT of work. It takes a special person to be able to spend all day with their lo or lo's. If I had a really good paying job, I don't know if I could leave it to stay home. I would prefer a nanny to a daycare, though. Darn daycare germs... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm/page/2#post-329242 Sun, 07 Oct 2012 14:09:59 +0000 littlek 329242@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm going to be the odd man out but I think daycare is good for our LO. He's learning way more than I can teach him, unless he wants to learn finance/actg. ;). At daycare he's learning sign language, Spanish, music appreciation, and getting great social interaction. It was awful leaving him at daycare the first day but seeing how happy he is when I pick him up makes me feel better about my decision to go back to work. He actually painted a fire truck the other day for me! How great is that to come home to! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm/page/2#post-329147 Sun, 07 Oct 2012 11:59:03 +0000 BSB 329147@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I always said that I don't think I would be a good SAHM. Right now, pre-baby I still think that. I'm also the breadwinner so right now I have to work. Maybe things will change when we have kids and my DH finishes school and maybe starts a successful business. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm#post-329124 Sun, 07 Oct 2012 11:14:04 +0000 blackbird 329124@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would not because I don't want to stay home. But even so, the financial security is just too important to us. That kind of money can put my child through college and give her life experiences that we may otherwise have to skimp on, and that's really important to me. We could make it on DH's salary, but I don't to. Being the only one bringing home a paycheck is stressful. And it's highly dependent on how stressful and such your job is. If i worked 60-80 hours/week and was massively stressed out, I'd be looking for an adjustment somewhere</p> <p>Why don't you go back to work and see how you like it? I think it's very, very common for a lot of moms to feel very stressed out about returning to work, but once they do, they are better off for it. And so many moms I know have mentioned how they regret the lose of identity and struggle with being a SAHM. It's not like you have to decide right now </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm#post-329077 Sun, 07 Oct 2012 10:20:15 +0000 PrincessBaby 329077@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am not the primary breadwinner, but I have a high salary/bonus compensation, AWESOME 401K match, combined with a free company car that I'm allowed to use for personal use and a free gas card. With everything rolled up, my annual income statement from my company is in the 6 figures. </p> <p>HOWEVER, my job is pretty stressful, fast-paced and busy, and I truly earn every dollar. So when I read your story, I'm sure that you're not making that much money without working really REALLY hard for it. If you would have asked this question to me when I made like $40K a year in my early 20s, I would be like "You are nuts! That's a ton of money!" But now I fully appreciate that high salaries come with VERY HIGH work responsibility. They don't give it up for free.</p> <p>I have considered the same thing, and to a lot of people, they may think it would be nutty to leave such a great-paying job, but at the end of the day, higher paying jobs usually require a higher level of work/effort/stress and so I would weigh that against the money that you're making to make a decision. To me, it's about more than the money, it's about quality of life for my LO when I'm running around totally stressed and exhausted. I haven't decided what my path will be, but I am definitely seriously considering staying home for a while or finding a job that is lower stress/lower pay. It would be different if we couldn't live off of DH's salary, but we are fortunate that he is the breadwinner by far, so we'd be totally fine. But it's still a very tough call, and I feel you. Good luck with whatever you decide:) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm#post-329004 Sun, 07 Oct 2012 09:01:48 +0000 looch 329004@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I also think daycares also don't write down on the sheet if your kid walked or whatever for the first time that day, so you can experience that at home...at least that's what I've read you can request at some places. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm#post-328650 Sat, 06 Oct 2012 18:46:05 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 328650@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>When I first had Lala, I was pretty sure I would have preferred staying at home with her. I felt that way for the first six months (even after I returned to work)... but after that, I was SO glad I stuck to my guns and went back. Not only because I'm the primary bread winner in our family (though less so now) but also for personal fulfillment. I would have been one grumpy lady!</p> <p>Meanwhile, Mr. Jacks absolutely loved being a stay at home parent!</p> <p>FWIW: with 2 kids I have only missed one first... and that was first giggle for M. She obliged me by replicating it as soon as I got home. Kids wait for their mamas before they do the cool stuff! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm#post-328645 Sat, 06 Oct 2012 18:20:05 +0000 SweetMamaM 328645@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would be a SAHM in a heartbeat, but I'm a teacher so we're not exactly talking huge amounts of money that we'd lose. In the end, you have to go with what brings you the most joy. Life's too damn short to worry about everything else - as long as you can make ends meet, do what makes you happy! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm#post-328521 Sat, 06 Oct 2012 14:34:22 +0000 HLK208 328521@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm torn. 140k is a big chunk of income to take away. If we were accustomed to living with both salaries, I wouldn't leave. However, you only get to raise your children once--so whatever makes you happiest. I would probably be happy making that much, if the hours weren't outrageous. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm#post-328517 Sat, 06 Oct 2012 14:25:45 +0000 daniellemybelle 328517@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's such a personal decision, but if I felt like DH could support us comfortably while I stayed home, I would definitely be a SAHM. I don't have LOs now but the only reason I would ever work with babies at home is if we needed it financially. Of course, "necessary" varies greatly family by family. I think if my husband made even within shooting distance of six figures, we'd be extremely comfortable, but that's not the case for all. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm#post-327319 Fri, 05 Oct 2012 11:31:43 +0000 ladyfingers 327319@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Absolutely! If we could still maintain our lifestyle with only DH working, I would stay home in a heartbeat. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm#post-327318 Fri, 05 Oct 2012 11:31:39 +0000 sorrycharlie 327318@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would absolutely. My dream "job" growing up and even now (with both a bachelor and master's degree) is to stay home with her. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm#post-327285 Fri, 05 Oct 2012 11:15:20 +0000 dagret 327285@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree with @Andrea @looch &amp; @thehistoryofus. I think it's more important to be accessible when your kids are older, and need more guidance. I feel that if i took that time off now, I'd be sacrificing that time when they're older. I work in an industry that once you're out of it, it's hard to get back in. I also think (and my kid's not born yet, so I'm not positive) that I wouldn't really enjoy being home all the time. </p> <p>My former boss was a WOHM and her husband passed away unexpectedly. She told me the thing that she was most grateful for was that she stayed in the workplace - she wasn't sure how she would provide for her daughters if she hadn't kept working all those years and had a solid career and good salary. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm#post-327263 Fri, 05 Oct 2012 11:03:56 +0000 annie624 327263@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Me personally, no. I don't see myself ever being a stay at home mom. Especially if I made good money and expected to maintain our current lifestyle. Plus, I love my job, so it'd be out of the question. That's just me, though. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm#post-327181 Fri, 05 Oct 2012 10:26:24 +0000 kml636 327181@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm in a similar situation. I am not crazy about my job but I make good money and I can't imagine not being able to travel. Of course, once LO arrives this all may change. I'm hoping to work part time. No way I can work full time once she's here, but even so cutting my salary in half is scary enough! </p> <p>i guess just enjoy your maternity leave and make a decision at the end of it? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm#post-327041 Fri, 05 Oct 2012 09:42:31 +0000 T-Mom 327041@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It is wonderful that you are in a situation to be able to choose whether to stay home or work and it wouldn't impact your lifestyle! I agree with testing out the waters a bit before making a big decision. Could you take an unpaid leave to extend your maternity leave a little longer? You could hire a nanny and try working for a month. Going part time sounds ideal, if possible. I work with several moms who left the workforce to be SAHM, and now they are just getting back. Some of them regret leaving cold turkey since sometimes it is hard to find a "place" after being gone for so long. It really depends on you and your personality. If you can't stand the thought of missing out, then do it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm#post-326959 Fri, 05 Oct 2012 09:22:48 +0000 mrsjyw 326959@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For me personally, I couldn't do it. But, I've always known that I'm not cut out to be a SAHM. Being a working mom will make me a better mom and for that reason alone; I wouldn't be able to give up my career, let alone the financial undertaking. </p> <p>I think if you and your husband can work it out financially, emotionally, there's no reason for you not to be a SAHM if that's what you and your family want! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm#post-326954 Fri, 05 Oct 2012 09:20:34 +0000 Kffw 326954@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Being a woman is hard these days. There are always sacrifices we have to make. I am pregnant with my first but have thought a lot about this issue since I started my career 5 years ago. My husband has to move around to progress is his career and we made the decision when the first opportunity to move came up that we would follow his career, not mine, since I may want to stay home with our future child. We recently moved and I didn't work for 8 months due to the move and not being able to find a job in my field. Of course after I got pregnant I landed a great paying job. So now I'm deciding what I will do after the baby comes. I really want to stay home but it is so nice to have the extra income. Ideally I would like to work part time from home or at least part time, but it is rare in my industry. I've worked very hard to get where I am so I hate to just give it up completely. But I also don't want to miss out on my son's first word, first steps, etc. So tough! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm#post-326842 Fri, 05 Oct 2012 08:52:16 +0000 SAHM0811 326842@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Coming from someone who has been a working mom and a SAHM, I agree with those that suggest you at least go back to work to try it out before quitting altogether. I went back to work after my first daughter was born and I honestly don't feel like I missed anything. She went to daycare and thrived well.</p> <p>What are the things you think you will be missing? With daycare, I felt that it was just a safe and fun place for her to eat, play and nap while I was away. I still had quality time with her every single evening... then there's mornings and all weekends too. </p> <p>What would your work schedule be like? I think that's something that needs to be considered too. Your finances actually seem like a non-issue since you guys can afford to be on one income. Being a working mom doesn't have to mean you'll miss out on a lot. But again, I guess it also depends on your work demands. </p> <p>Oh and I agree with @Andrea and the others... My eldest is gearing up for Kindergarten next year. We've been touring schools... It's a whole other world when they go to school. All the infant stuff (sorry if this sounds harsh) is really almost petty when compared to the needs of a child in school, so also consider going back to work for now and cutting back on hours or staying home then instead. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm#post-326799 Fri, 05 Oct 2012 08:38:36 +0000 lawbee11 326799@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think a lot of it depends on how demanding your job is. If you have a set schedule and work around 40 hours a week, I probably wouldn't because you know you'll have time in the mornings/at night/on the weekends with your LO. If your job is very demanding, though, and working means going in early, staying late, having to check emails at home, and working on the weekends, I definitely would (or at least go part-time). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm#post-326769 Fri, 05 Oct 2012 08:29:39 +0000 MamaBehr 326769@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I read a story about a nurse who worked with exclusively terminally ill patients, and she would ask them one thing "what is something you regret the most?" and she said almost all of them wished they had spend more time with their families. This is rather ironic that I'm typing this to you, because for the last seven months I have struggled with my new SAHM status, because I frequently have to fight the urge to just get a job to get a job (I'm only about 85% of the way happy with my SAHM status). This is a hard decision to make, I wish you luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm#post-326679 Fri, 05 Oct 2012 07:41:17 +0000 Andrea 326679@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Thehistoryofus: @looch: :-D Glad you both know what I mean! They aren't going to remember this time but they will remember if you are always too busy working and can't go to their soccer games, etc. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm#post-326643 Fri, 05 Oct 2012 07:22:54 +0000 looch 326643@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Andrea: I hear you...I really think kids need you more when they're in school and sometimes the school schedule makes it difficult to work a full day. There's drop off, pick up, trips, meetings, etc. </p> <p>I really think anyone can be the care provider for an infant. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm#post-326621 Fri, 05 Oct 2012 07:08:27 +0000 T.H.O.U. 326621@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Andrea: I agree with this too, I am hoping that later on I can focus more time on them. She won't remember a lot of this time now and I still feel like we have a great relationship. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm#post-326608 Fri, 05 Oct 2012 07:01:11 +0000 winniebee 326608@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would, but since right now I make double what my husband makes, we can't afford it. He's finishing his residency and soon it will be a possibility, but I don't know how I will feel then. When I go back to work at the end of the month, I'm going back 4 days and taking a 30K paycut though to be home 1 extra day with my son. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm#post-326592 Fri, 05 Oct 2012 06:51:59 +0000 Andrea 326592@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've continued to work because I have a nice amount of take home pay. Kids do grow so fast in the first few years but I don't feel like I need to spend every second with my kids. My goal is to work less when they are older, not younger. I feel like they will really need me more later to help with homework and be involved in their extra curriculars. So I would rather work a lot more now so I can do that. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm#post-326589 Fri, 05 Oct 2012 06:49:33 +0000 T.H.O.U. 326589@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Money aside, are you 100% sure you would be happy as a SAHM. I am very career oriented and the first few months I thought like you did, but I really believe now I couldn't stay home full time. Plus now that my daughter is a year old, I love that she is learning ALL kinds of new things in daycare. </p> <p>The only thing I could change is that I would love to be able to work 20-30 hours, even if I had to make up the time at home when she went to bed. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/would-you-quit-a-high-paying-job-to-be-a-sahm#post-326585 Fri, 05 Oct 2012 06:46:53 +0000 MediaNaranja 326585@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Take this with a lump of salt, as I don't have any LOs yet, but at least for me I know that I wouldn't be able to. I will most likely always be the primary breadwinner in our household, so if anyone were to sah it would be my husband. Sometimes I get sad thinking about the things that I will miss, but I also keep in mind that I had two working parents &amp; don't feel like I missed out on having them around.</p> <p>I would do what other posters have suggested...maybe go back to work for a few months, and see how you feel about it then? I would also hate the thought of losing the $40k.... </p>