https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 30 Apr 2026 12:39:41 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-daycare#post-2769497 Wed, 23 Aug 2017 23:59:56 +0000 looch 2769497@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yo can always stop going, but you might not have a chance to enroll later. That being said, my kid started daycare at 2 and I won't lie, it was rough for him, he cried everyday at drop off for a year. He's almost 7 and he still has tough times with drop off at his favorite camp, so it's very much personality driven. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-daycare#post-2769376 Wed, 23 Aug 2017 12:22:05 +0000 MrsADS 2769376@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Agh, I posted and it's gone now. I am not in this situation at all, but my son is about to turn 2 and is in full time daycare. The last few months have been kind of rough. I think it is just the age. He is having a lot of separation anxiety, daycare makes him SO tired which really exacerbates his tantrums, and overall it has been a stressful, worrying experience recently for my husband and I. I am actually trying to change my hours at work so I can only work 3 days/week and keep him home some more. I think 5 days/week is just too much for him at this age. 21 months is still so young, but every child is different! It may provide her some stability, but it might be an added stressor if you already have a lot going on. Honestly I would probably not enroll her at this point based on everything you wrote, but that's also based on my recent experiences. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-daycare#post-2769375 Wed, 23 Aug 2017 12:20:06 +0000 Mrs. Carrot 2769375@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@LindsayLou: I agree with this. Kids are pretty resilient and I think she would adapt (in terms of your concern about disrupting her) and it would be a great opportunity for her to start engaging in a school setting. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-daycare#post-2769374 Wed, 23 Aug 2017 12:14:21 +0000 LindsayLou 2769374@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would at least try it out. My mom is a former head start teacher who now works in early education and childcare regulation. So I strongly believe in the benefits of early childhood education. Head start is all about supporting kids and families, so I think it could be a great source of stability. Head start is also very big on family involvement, so I bet they would love to have one of you help in the classroom if the long school hours were too much. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-daycare#post-2769330 Wed, 23 Aug 2017 10:16:41 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2769330@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Pickle: that would be ideal. Unfortunately it's full time or we give up the spot. They require 85% attendance. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-daycare#post-2769329 Wed, 23 Aug 2017 10:15:16 +0000 Mrs. Pickle 2769329@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would send her at least part time. My thought it that it could be good for her to have some playmates since most of her life she had T. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-daycare#post-2769326 Wed, 23 Aug 2017 10:04:03 +0000 Adira 2769326@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Turtle: Ugh, I can understand that. You guys are so strong and selfless being foster parents. What a wonderful gift you've given T and O. I can't imagine how hard this is. &lt;3 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-daycare#post-2769324 Wed, 23 Aug 2017 09:55:26 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2769324@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: That's my hope. It was hard not hearing, but it's also hard getting photos. Good, of course, but every time it opens up the wound. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-daycare#post-2769323 Wed, 23 Aug 2017 09:54:02 +0000 nwm 2769323@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Have you been able to visit the school, meet the teachers, etc.? If it's as good as it sounds, school might actually be a great source of stability and routine in an otherwise hectic time, rather than a disruption. I would lean in favor of doing it!</p> <p>The situation with T sounds so hard. Sending :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-daycare#post-2769320 Wed, 23 Aug 2017 09:41:26 +0000 Adira 2769320@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Turtle: I'm glad to hear you have at least gotten some updates since he left you. I can't even begin to imagine how hard that first month was, not knowing how things were going. Hopefully things are going well for him and that his mom eventually opens up to you more and sees you as an extension of his family. &lt;3 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-daycare#post-2769319 Wed, 23 Aug 2017 09:39:37 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2769319@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@RonjaL7: It is so hard. Worth it to give these kids some love and stability, but so hard. If you're serious about adoption I'd suggest talking to state adoptions or a foster agency that specifically works with "low risk"kids. That is a weird term that means low risk of going back to bio parents. Not a sure thing, but much more so than fostering. I'd be happy to chat more if you'd like. </p> <p>@Adira: A bit. I've been trying to maintain a respectful distance and not be pushy with his mom, so we didn't hear from her for about a month. But I texted her on his second birthday and told her we were mailing a few little things for him and since then she's been sending some pics and updates. I'm cautiously optimistic that she will remain in contact and maybe even let us see him eventually when she feels more comfortable and sees us as a support rather than a threat. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-daycare#post-2769318 Wed, 23 Aug 2017 09:33:43 +0000 Adira 2769318@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Turtle: Unrelated (sorry), but do you get updates at all about how T is doing? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-daycare#post-2769316 Wed, 23 Aug 2017 09:25:16 +0000 RonjaL7 2769316@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm so sad that T left you guys. I absolutely LOVED reading your blog posts about him. </p> <p>I keep wanting to adopt, but I'm too afraid of a situation similar to this... </p> <p>I would take the spot, life is always crazy with little ones. I wouldn't want to miss the opportunity to get her in. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-daycare#post-2769314 Wed, 23 Aug 2017 09:10:46 +0000 LemonJack 2769314@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It sounds like a great opportunity. The timing does seem less than ideal, but I think if I were in your situation I'd still do it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-daycare#post-2769295 Tue, 22 Aug 2017 23:02:09 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2769295@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@PinkElephant: haha yeah this is kind of what I'm thinking. Attendance required is 85%. So we could have her absent one day every two weeks or pick her up early once a week. But it's what I'm leaning towards at the moment, especially since I'm not home with her all that much right now anyway! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-daycare#post-2769294 Tue, 22 Aug 2017 22:23:36 +0000 PinkElephant 2769294@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd take the spot and just opt not to send her full time for now if it feels like too much. I know it's not totally the same, but I've taken a similar approach with my then four year old's pre-k program. We had a great offer for a full day full week program, which was more than I felt she (and I ) needed, but it had some great perks like gymnastics, dance, cooking, and yoga as part of her day. I figured worst case scenario if it was really too much for her, I could let her be "absent" every other Friday, or pick her up early sometimes. I never even exercised that option.<br /> Similarly, for kindergarten I'm putting her in an enrichment program three afternoons a week. Initially I think it might've a bit much, but by mid year I know it'll be what she needs, and I don't want to get to that point and not have a spot for her (a likely scenario).</p> <p>If your parents are awesome enough to support you by caring for O 1-2 days per week, I bet you can be confident they'd still find other ways to step in and be very present for her - maybe they could do pick up and drop off and aftercare on days that were theirs previously?</p> <p>ETA: just realized its a state funded program so there may be attendance requirements...can you feel that out? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-daycare#post-2769292 Tue, 22 Aug 2017 22:19:30 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2769292@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@charlotte: it's a free program. They lose funding if they don't fill the spot in 30 days. Hence the push to decide now. I did ask if we could wait till after our trip in Nov, which would put us right at 30 days. But I'm beginning to feel like everyone thinks I'm crazy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-daycare#post-2769289 Tue, 22 Aug 2017 22:05:26 +0000 charlotte 2769289@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Can you pay to hold the spot but not send her until court is over and life calms down a little bit? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-daycare#post-2769287 Tue, 22 Aug 2017 21:48:39 +0000 bees_knees 2769287@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't have foster children, nor are my kids in daycare, so maybe this isn't the most "educated" opinion. But I feel like if everyone is happy in your current situation, then you should keep doing it! That's a lot of "WHAT IFs" (...you go back to school, another spot never opens again, etc) for such a big decision. Think on it a couple days and then do whatever feels right for right now. </p> <p>O is lucky to have you! :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-daycare#post-2769286 Tue, 22 Aug 2017 21:25:52 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2769286@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We just found out that O got a spot in our local Early Head Start. It's a great program, really nice classrooms, great teachers, etc. It is encouraged that foster parents use it. O is 21 months and both of us work with flexible schedules, some from home. So far we've managed with taking turns being home with her and using my parents 1-2 partial days per week. She loves that and so do they. My wife has been watching her more lately because I have a new job, and that has also been great bonding time for them. We have been told that toddler spots rarely open up in this program and that if we don't take this spot we may not get another opportunity. </p> <p>The timing is terrible. She has surgery scheduled for September. T went back to his mom last month. We have a really big important court date coming up. There's a lot going on right now and I hate to disrupt her life even more, especially since we don't need full time care. But I'm worried that I'd be making a mistake turning it down and end up in trouble if I go back to school and need full time care next year. </p> <p>Thoughts? </p>