https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 21 May 2026 08:20:51 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/3#post-1818916 Fri, 15 Aug 2014 22:03:16 +0000 MrsRcCar 1818916@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Dh and I lived together throughout college but we paid our own way. If our boys choose to live with their SO in college they can work just like we did. Even if they don't live with an SO they can work to provide for themselves. College is hard and life is hard, nothing prepares you for it like just getting it done yourself. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/3#post-1818797 Fri, 15 Aug 2014 20:51:09 +0000 pui 1818797@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If I am paying their rent, nope. They would need to be paying their own rent if they want to live together. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/3#post-1818792 Fri, 15 Aug 2014 20:48:09 +0000 Vegmama 1818792@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I just saw this. I moved in with my bf during 1st tri of my junior year. My parents were supportive, because they knew we were very serious, and they had met him many, many times. I ended up marrying him, so I guess it was good. I was happy my parents supported me, and let me make my choice. </p> <p>If I were having to decide this specific situation (in your prompt), I would be inclined to say no. But again, maybe letting them make their own choice is better? </p> <p>With that said, knowing how I was at that age, I'd probably be like, "Ok mom and dad ... We won't live together" ... Then, I'd let them help me with my rent, and we'd just spend every night together anyway. That's terrible to say, but college kids think they know everything!! ;) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/3#post-1785470 Mon, 28 Jul 2014 14:47:53 +0000 birdofafeather 1785470@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>nope. and nothing to do with on vs. off campus as everyone lived off campus after freshmen year (whether in a sorority, frat or apt). you want to live with your SO, then you have to pay for it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/3#post-1785300 Mon, 28 Jul 2014 13:38:53 +0000 gingerbebe 1785300@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Absolutely not. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/3#post-1785101 Mon, 28 Jul 2014 12:12:35 +0000 Dandelion 1785101@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Not if it's going to cost me more for them to do that. If living off, paying half rent and utilities is cheaper than on campus, then sure. But, gf has to be able to show she's got her half (or my kid has to show he can cover what I'm not paying). It's gotta make $$ sense to me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/3#post-1785088 Mon, 28 Jul 2014 12:08:37 +0000 jedeve 1785088@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd keep paying for tuition, books, etc., but not rent or food. I'm not going to subsidize someone else's kid!</p> <p>But mainly I think college is a good time for growth and that can be tampered by getting tied down. I don't mind if they date seriously, but I wouldn't want to facilitate them tying themselves down to that degree while in college. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/3#post-1785069 Mon, 28 Jul 2014 12:03:31 +0000 MrsKoala 1785069@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nope in the sense that I would no longer continue to pay their living expenses when they decide to live off campus whether with friends or a significant other. You want to live in an apartment then you have to be able to pay for one. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/3#post-1785056 Mon, 28 Jul 2014 11:57:48 +0000 HLK208 1785056@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If the were engaged, yes. If they weren't committed to each other, no way. I wouldn't have a problem if they paid for it themselves though. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/3#post-1782429 Fri, 25 Jul 2014 19:36:10 +0000 lilyofthewest 1782429@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I can't see using money as a tool to have power over my kiddo's relationship or housing choices. I will offer what support I can (though I doubt I will be able or willing to cover all expenses). The rest is up to my kid to decide: good decisions and bad decisions. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/2#post-1782408 Fri, 25 Jul 2014 19:10:56 +0000 Applesandbananas 1782408@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would contribute a little, but not as much as if he lived on campus. </p> <p>I moved in with DH (then bf) a few months after turning 18 and lived with him through college. My parents didn't pay rent/utilities, but they still paid everything they did before (health insurance, car insurance, campus meal plan - the commuter version, etc.) they just didn't pay for a dorm room. So I'd probably do something similar. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/2#post-1782222 Fri, 25 Jul 2014 16:14:42 +0000 BrandNewMom 1782222@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parent's rule was once I moved in with a boy I was financialy cut off FOREVER. So no more tuition help, no health insurance...<br /> Still did it, and I regret it SO much! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/2#post-1782217 Fri, 25 Jul 2014 16:11:11 +0000 anandam 1782217@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nope. If they're so grown up that they feel ready to shack up, they need to be able to pay their own bills. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/2#post-1782202 Fri, 25 Jul 2014 16:05:56 +0000 daniellemybelle 1782202@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@lawbee11: Well said!</p> <p>I would continue to pay her tuition and let her stay on our insurance, but I would not pay for her housing/utilities/etc.</p> <p>It's a tough one though because I knew couples in college who lived together, but kept up appearances for their families. I'd be irritated to find out I paid for an apartment to sit empty while LO played house at her boyfriend's place! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/2#post-1782170 Fri, 25 Jul 2014 15:49:33 +0000 whenoceansrise 1782170@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>definitely not. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/2#post-1782122 Fri, 25 Jul 2014 15:27:21 +0000 sunny 1782122@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Sketchbook: Yup my experience at university too. There was no option to live on campus because there was no space. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/2#post-1782109 Fri, 25 Jul 2014 15:18:47 +0000 Honeydew 1782109@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>With adult decisions comes with adult responsibilities. If I am supporting my child with tuition, living expenses, etc, than I will let my child know that it is their decision to forgo the privileges of being a child to live as an adult. Their decision. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/2#post-1782103 Fri, 25 Jul 2014 15:13:01 +0000 Mrs. Sketchbook 1782103@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Also re on or off campus, at my large state school there weren't enough dorms for anyone other than freshmen. Sophomores had to enter a lottery. My husband couldn't get a dorm his sophomore year and had to move off. It was basically understood that no-one except exchange students even attempted to live in a dorm by the time you were a junior. This was totally the norm at all the colleges in our state.</p> <p>ETA: all the public colleges I mean I guess. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/2#post-1782096 Fri, 25 Jul 2014 15:09:55 +0000 Mrs. Sketchbook 1782096@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH and I lived together my senior year (he was working). We paid our own rent and utilities but did get support in the rp of insurance and cell bill. We also lived together in graduate school. Looking back I regret it. My senior year was stressful and it would have been more fun if I had been living with friends and our relationship had been less serious. But we were very committed to each other so I guess as far as such a scenario would go, it was as stable as it could be. We moved in together when I was 21 and were engaged a few days after I turned 23 and married a few days after I turned 24. I don't think our relationship would have suffered from a little more distance earlier on though! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/2#post-1782095 Fri, 25 Jul 2014 15:09:32 +0000 loveisstrange 1782095@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I will pay for a dorm. Period. If said child wants to pay rent and utilities, more power to them. Go for it, kid. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/2#post-1782088 Fri, 25 Jul 2014 15:02:20 +0000 LuLu Mom 1782088@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would not be paying for that. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/2#post-1781946 Fri, 25 Jul 2014 13:52:27 +0000 namaste 1781946@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@loki: Agreed so much.</p> <p>I don't care if you're in college or out of it, if your parents are still paying your bills, they have the right to say who you can live with and I wouldn't let my child's SO live with them while I'm paying for their cost of living. As a 20-something with friends who have parents who allow them to do this, it has always ended terribly. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/2#post-1781939 Fri, 25 Jul 2014 13:50:23 +0000 autumnlove 1781939@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Prob not...but who knows! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/2#post-1781938 Fri, 25 Jul 2014 13:50:23 +0000 Adira 1781938@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: Yeah, I should have said rooms. Ours had co-ed dorms too!</p> <p>@looch: Ahh, I guess it'll all depend on where they go then! At my college, I stayed on campus the entire time I was there and living off campus tended to be more expensive. If my son goes to a school that has different rooming options, we will still help pay for him to live where ever he can. And if he chooses to live with a significant other, then that's up to him. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/2#post-1781929 Fri, 25 Jul 2014 13:46:17 +0000 wonderstruck 1781929@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nope. And it has nothing to do with college, I just believe that living together is for adult relationships, and sorry, but you're not an adult yet if mom and dad are still paying your rent and utilities! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/2#post-1781903 Fri, 25 Jul 2014 13:36:48 +0000 meredithNYC 1781903@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Probably not. Honestly, I would rather my children not be in such serious relationships at that young of an age. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/2#post-1781898 Fri, 25 Jul 2014 13:34:04 +0000 regberadaisy 1781898@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@lawbee11: @sunny: um. The year I lived with my GFs was my most HATED year of college. I hated living with them. HATED. Worst decision EVER. And these were all girls i knew very well because we were all in a hardcore major together. One was my then best friend. Out of the 3 only one I still maintain contact with.</p> <p>Used condoms on living room floor. 'Nuff said. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/2#post-1781894 Fri, 25 Jul 2014 13:33:22 +0000 dagret 1781894@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Maybe, maybe not. I'll cross that bridge when I come to it. My brother &amp; SIL met when they became housemates. So technically they each had their own bedrooms but only slept in one. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/2#post-1781889 Fri, 25 Jul 2014 13:31:30 +0000 sunny 1781889@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: Oh yes... that can definitely happen! For me, I actually didn't know my roommates before I moved in because I was a transfer student. It was just luck that I clicked with all of them! 4 of them knew each other before, and 1 other girl was new like me. We all got along great and we are still friends many years later (though we all now live really far away from each other!). I think sometimes it might actually work out better if you *don't* know each other that well before. But its kind of a chance you are taking! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-living-with-bf-and-gf-during-college/page/2#post-1781888 Fri, 25 Jul 2014 13:30:49 +0000 looch 1781888@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: So, what do you do if your kid goes to a college, like I did, that has a shortage of housing, so most juniors move off and then come back senior year? Would it be okay if your son moved in with other guys?</p> <p>I will decide when the time comes. I just don't know enough about the future to decide rationally! I think a lot of it depends on the school itself, how you spend your freshman year kind of shapes the experience, if you have a large population of transfers, etc. I loved living with my roommates, it was a 4 year par-tay!!!! </p>