https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sat, 02 May 2026 14:25:14 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-wedding-or-recital#post-2896525 Tue, 10 Sep 2019 18:30:22 +0000 cake2017 2896525@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mamaof2: Wedding. like others stated- the daughter will have many more recitals. Weddings are major events. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-wedding-or-recital#post-2896524 Tue, 10 Sep 2019 17:53:45 +0000 Elizabear 2896524@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Maybe she can ask her daughter if she would prefer the do "another" recital where she gets to wear her costume and make up and do her dances for Mommy or have her pick that mommy will be there but have to leave right after she dances to go to the wedding? If she picks the latter, just act like she was there! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-wedding-or-recital#post-2896517 Tue, 10 Sep 2019 15:34:23 +0000 merriment 2896517@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Agree with the majority of suggestions above that she needs to attend the wedding. Perhaps she could also ask the studio about attending the dress rehearsal? Will there be a video of the recital? Perhaps the father could plan a super special dinner out after the recital that mom misses. But overall, 8 is old enough to start to understand commitments and promises to friends, as tough as it is. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-wedding-or-recital#post-2896497 Tue, 10 Sep 2019 11:19:55 +0000 Autumnmama79 2896497@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would definitely say she needs to be at the wedding 100%. If that means missing one of the recital days, thats okay. </p> <p>I have a 10yo DD and emotions are big and expectations are high. But really, she gets upset about something or thinks she'll be upset about something and then it blows over and is totally forgotten. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-wedding-or-recital#post-2896452 Mon, 09 Sep 2019 19:05:07 +0000 Ms.Mermaid 2896452@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It’s far enough out from the wedding that she could suggest a rehearsal lunch to the bride, which is what I always encourage people with Sunday weddings - it feels so much less stressed/time crunched and we avoided the Saturday night private room minimums. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-wedding-or-recital#post-2896447 Mon, 09 Sep 2019 17:36:07 +0000 JennyPenny 2896447@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Agreed with others. Definitely attend the wedding and I’d even probably skip the recital for the rehearsal too if it was a really close friend. If I missed both I’d ask someone to record it or buy a video of it (most places do that right?) and make a special night of sitting down with DD to watch the tape together. Maybe with popcorn or ice cream or something special. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-wedding-or-recital#post-2896428 Mon, 09 Sep 2019 15:25:09 +0000 erinbaderin 2896428@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Skip the rehearsal for the recital - it’s not like she can’t figure out what she’s supposed to do on the fly. You can’t miss your BFF’s wedding for a dance recital! I’m with the people who don’t really understand why this is a dilemma. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-wedding-or-recital#post-2896427 Mon, 09 Sep 2019 15:17:31 +0000 annem1990 2896427@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Personally, I'd skip the recital. A close friend's wedding is a once in a lifetime event, whereas your child will have a lot of these types of events. As long as there's someone there to support her, I'd go to the wedding. I have absolutely amazing parents but I am positive they had to miss stuff like this on occasion for other obligations (or because they had 3 other kids obligations to juggle!). Just be upfront ahead of time and promise to watch the video or something together afterwards as a special treat. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-wedding-or-recital#post-2896426 Mon, 09 Sep 2019 15:04:49 +0000 JJ2626 2896426@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ok the idea of skipping a close friend’s wedding for a kid’s recital sounds insane to me! Weddings are huge life events. No one will remember this recital and kids need to learn there are bigger things in life. That said, I’d probably say to skip the wedding rehearsal since I think rehearsing is stupid and really unnecessary anyway. But I wouldn’t want to miss a rehearsal dinner so would skip the recital for that if necessary. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-wedding-or-recital#post-2896406 Mon, 09 Sep 2019 13:34:46 +0000 Mamaof2 2896406@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@hummusgirl: yep she was in her wedding! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-wedding-or-recital#post-2896405 Mon, 09 Sep 2019 13:34:13 +0000 Mamaof2 2896405@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Ajsmommy: great idea</p> <p>@hummusgirl: love this - Great points!</p> <p>@Foodnerd81: wedding is about 1hr45 mins away so a little far =(</p> <p>@PinkElephant: Rehearsal would definitely be a conflict - both in PM<br /> Recital is TBD - she emailed the owners and they said they wouldnt have a schedule until March at the earliest for the recital - my friend is so stressed she doesnt want to wait and see - she wants to know now...... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-wedding-or-recital#post-2896402 Mon, 09 Sep 2019 12:54:44 +0000 PinkElephant 2896402@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>One more vote for recital Saturday, wedding Sunday. I'm assuming it's the same performance both days. The only way I'd do it differently is if DD has a "lead" or larger role on Sunday...then it's trickier, so hopefully that's not the case. </p> <p>Is your friend positive that the timing will be in conflict? Seems like there's potential for her to see her daughter dance, then jet out of there for the rehearsal dinner, if the bride-to-be-friend is really making a big stink. Depending on your friend's standing at the dance studio (are they long time, loyal students, or new to this), how involved the daughter is (lots of numbers or just one), and how friendly she is with the studio owner, I suppose she could mention how helpful it would be if DD's class could dance before intermission - but as a dance mom myself, I know that's really sticky territory and would have to be brought up naturally/just the right way....but something to keep in mind. It may actually work itself out anyway that the timings don't fully overlap. The flip side of that coin is, if the bride desperately wants the friend at the rehearsal, could she try to work the timing around the recital timing (i.e., bump it one direction or another by an hour) if it made a difference? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-wedding-or-recital#post-2896380 Mon, 09 Sep 2019 10:48:10 +0000 ALV91711 2896380@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Same as others. This wedding only happens one time. It will be good for DD to learn to share moms time. </p> <p>Is there a grandparent or another relative that could go to the Sunday recital? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-wedding-or-recital#post-2896378 Mon, 09 Sep 2019 10:33:29 +0000 Foodnerd81 2896378@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Both are local it sounds like, right? I agree I would go to recital Saturday, wedding Sunday. There’s probably a dress rehearsal too for the recital that she can attend. It’s not her first recital is it? I think they will all get over it between now and then (except the friend if she skips the entire wedding for a recital, that might be hard for the friend to get over. ) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-wedding-or-recital#post-2896371 Mon, 09 Sep 2019 08:45:15 +0000 lindseykaye 2896371@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@hummusgirl: All of this! </p> <p>Honestly, it seems like the best-case scenario for these two events happening on the same weekend. I'm sure it will be busy as heck but also lots of fun! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-wedding-or-recital#post-2896370 Mon, 09 Sep 2019 08:38:53 +0000 graceandjoy 2896370@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd do the same, and just ask someone in the wedding to fill you in on anything that you should know for the big day. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-wedding-or-recital#post-2896368 Mon, 09 Sep 2019 08:24:41 +0000 hummusgirl 2896368@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Same as the others. It's good to teach your kids compromise and that you invest in your really important relationships. And the daughter will probably have many more recitals and won't remember this in the long term, but the BFF will definitely remember/resent that your friend didn't attend the wedding. And she can remind the daughter that there are two recitals for a reason - because many people can't attend both! Maybe see if someone else can attend the second recital in place of the mom (relative, friend, etc.) to make it special.</p> <p>ETA - was the BFF in your friend's wedding? Did she work really hard to show up for her? That's another thing she could mention to her daughter - this is something friends do for each other (as much as possible). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-wedding-or-recital#post-2896366 Mon, 09 Sep 2019 08:19:38 +0000 Baby Boy Mom 2896366@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Ajsmommy: Same! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-wedding-or-recital#post-2896364 Mon, 09 Sep 2019 08:09:42 +0000 Ajsmommy 2896364@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd skip the wedding rehearsal on the 6th and go to the recital and do it up really special for DD.. flowers/big fancy dinner after/big celebration</p> <p>Then I'd go to the wedding on Sunday </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/wwyd-wedding-or-recital#post-2896362 Mon, 09 Sep 2019 07:59:10 +0000 Mamaof2 2896362@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Posting for a friend who is in a bind and doesn't know what to do! I told her I would poll the internet for her - haha</p> <p>DD is 8 and in dance her yearly recital is June 6th and 7th</p> <p>Her BFF from college is getting married June 7th and the rehearsal is June 6th</p> <p>What would you do?</p> <p>Tell BFF that you cant be in the wedding or even attend - (apparently she will be pissed)</p> <p>Tell DD you cant attend the recital but her dad will be there</p> <p>Skip the wedding rehearsal on Saturday and go to recital and then skip recital on Sunday and go to wedding (she says her DD would be so mad if she missed either day)</p> <p>Something else we cant think of??</p> <p>She is SOOOO stressed about this! </p>