https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 07 May 2026 23:12:06 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/your-new-body-amp-sex-after-baby#post-698138 Sun, 07 Apr 2013 23:38:51 +0000 twoofeverything 698138@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We DTD at 4 weeks, on Christmas. I felt disgusting. My weight was almost back to normal, but things just...hung. And my c-section scar just...bulged. Eeew.<br /> I did everything I could to feel pretty that night. Went for a manicure. Had a haircut. Bought some new lingerie that didn't make me feel *quite* so fat. And then? I asked DH to tell me nice things :-) At that point, I wasn't BFing, either, so a glass of wine did wonders.<br /> I also started working out and eating well for a week or so beforehand. Even though it did absolutely nothing at first, it made me feel more confident.<br /> FWIW, your DH is probably pretty happy for ANYTHING these days. Mine was.<br /> Also? ZOMG, use some lube. I know you don't care about that part, but I needed it for the first 2-3 times. I wouldn't feel right unless I said something about that! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/your-new-body-amp-sex-after-baby#post-698133 Sun, 07 Apr 2013 23:30:28 +0000 MrsStar 698133@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Photojane yeap, 4 weeks, I will still sore and felt bruised down there but I didn't tear during delivery which made it easier. Hubby will definitiely be waiting longer next time round! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/your-new-body-amp-sex-after-baby#post-686821 Wed, 03 Apr 2013 11:47:35 +0000 mrsjyw 686821@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We had sex for the first time at 6 wks pp, I was so concerned about the pain from episiotomy healing that I didn't pay attn to my flabby body. And honestly since then? It's been pretty hit or miss because both of us are so tired. We're just now back to feeling normal and in the swing of things and I'm now 18 wks pp! :) It's better than ever before now though, with no side effects from epi (WHEW!) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/your-new-body-amp-sex-after-baby#post-686743 Wed, 03 Apr 2013 11:32:41 +0000 photojane 686743@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thanks for all the commiseration &amp; advice ladies. I think I'll run out &amp; get something cute to wear before the big night. I don't have the breastfeeding boob excuse, but maybe if I'm wearing something new it won't be weird that I don't take it off. :)</p> <p>@Mummystar: 4 weeks?! You go, girl! Lucky hubby ;) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/your-new-body-amp-sex-after-baby#post-685390 Tue, 02 Apr 2013 19:04:34 +0000 chrispygal 685390@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was so revved up by 6 weeks postpartum, I just didn't care. lol. Plus, I knew I had just had a baby so I cut myself some slack. Probably another 6 weeks later is when I really started shying away from intimacy because I am carrying around about 25 pounds of baby weight still and hate how I look. I'm with the turn the lights off camp, but I'd add a nice cocktail or two. I keep reminding myself that DH loves me and our daughter, and that's what matters most. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/your-new-body-amp-sex-after-baby#post-685381 Tue, 02 Apr 2013 19:00:25 +0000 MsLipGloss 685381@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think we had sex for the first time around 10ish weeks? Yeah, I was totally self-conscious, but we left the lights off and went slow and it went pretty well. My DH was super excited and told me I was still hot. ;). Even if he lied, I will always love him for it! For me, it has gotten a little easier (emotionally) each time. I am also reminded of how much I miss *us* and how important it is to stay connected and close. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/your-new-body-amp-sex-after-baby#post-685351 Tue, 02 Apr 2013 18:39:44 +0000 immabeetoo 685351@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Great advice above. Lights off music up and something that makes you feel better like a cute new cami or slip. Also expressing your fears to him ahead of time so he's aware but then not talking about it during. For me that meant I didn't want him touching my stomach at first. It was better than I expected! It's easier for me to be body positive when DH does a great job of complimenting and reassuring me he's still attracted to me on the regular. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/your-new-body-amp-sex-after-baby#post-685348 Tue, 02 Apr 2013 18:36:39 +0000 Dandelion 685348@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've been changing and stuff in front of DH since the day we left the hospital, and he still says he can't wait for the all clear for dtd from the doc. he knows what he's getting into, and at least he knows it's not as bad now as it was when I first got home. So, maybe just start trying to feel comfortable in front of him now, so that you can gauge his reaction and then at sexy time you will know that he loves you no matter what, and then you will be able to enjoy it without that worry. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/your-new-body-amp-sex-after-baby#post-685326 Tue, 02 Apr 2013 18:19:08 +0000 petunia354 685326@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Definitely lights off and I second maybe getting a little nighty or something that can just be pulled up. Anything that covers the areas that you are feeling self conscious about will be tremendously helpful in getting you both in the "mood". Also, I'm 13 weeks pp and we are still struggling with accomplishing the mission so to speak. I had a c-section and never expected things to be so uncomfortable pp. So don't be discouraged if it doesn't work the first time. We've found that just trying at all has made us feel closer! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/your-new-body-amp-sex-after-baby#post-685318 Tue, 02 Apr 2013 18:14:14 +0000 MrsStar 685318@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Treat yourself to some new cute pjs and keep the top on during. dh and i started at 4 weeks pp and now at 6 months pp its almost back to how it was. I kept the lights off the first few times and dh didn't seem to notice my new flab collection. Now I'm still self concious but hubby makes a point of saying how beautiful i am which is nice to hear even if i don't believe it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/your-new-body-amp-sex-after-baby#post-685312 Tue, 02 Apr 2013 18:11:05 +0000 Penny Lane 685312@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>we started getting down again at 8 weeks PP, but it wasn't until at least 3 or 4 months PP that I allowed my cami to be removed, partly because of BFing nipple pain, but also partly because i was embarrassed about my body! also, lights off for sure!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/your-new-body-amp-sex-after-baby#post-685295 Tue, 02 Apr 2013 17:53:33 +0000 pl0508 685295@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@chopsuey119: I second the lights off strategy !! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/your-new-body-amp-sex-after-baby#post-685292 Tue, 02 Apr 2013 17:52:44 +0000 pl0508 685292@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Welllll you know that we've been struggling with actually getting the mission accomplished in the bedroom. Haha. I'm 10 wks pp and we have tried 3 times. Each time a little better but it's still not normal ! </p> <p>Have you thought about wearing a little slip dress or something during ? Maybe you can treat yourself to something really sweet and pretty and will feel more comfy since you will be a little more covered? I guarantee Dan won't mind ! (Or at least my husband wouldn't !!). I've kept a tank on each time since I am bf I just don't feel comfortable having my boobs out (I don't feel like thinking of them sexually AT ALL. It just weirds me out) and DH has acted like Christmas morning each time we give it a go !! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/your-new-body-amp-sex-after-baby#post-685286 Tue, 02 Apr 2013 17:48:42 +0000 chopsuey 685286@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Wear a cami, and do it in the dark!<br /> I was flabulous at 6 weeks but eh. After having 2 kids nothing really fazes or makes me self conscious.<br /> First time was a bit odd, but it's gotten a lot better! I think it took a good 10-12 weeks pp for things to feel natural again. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/your-new-body-amp-sex-after-baby#post-685278 Tue, 02 Apr 2013 17:36:18 +0000 Rubies 685278@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It took MUCH LONGER than 7 weeks before DH and I had sex again. I was still so self-conscious of my body but DH was so supportive and didn't seem to pay any attention to flab city (ie. my body). Have you voiced your concerns with your husband? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/your-new-body-amp-sex-after-baby#post-685271 Tue, 02 Apr 2013 17:32:17 +0000 photojane 685271@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sadie is 7 weeks today, and Dan &amp; I haven't sex'd yet. My sutures never fell out on their own like they were supposed to, and since they were all up in my vag, I was forbidden to sex. I have an appointment next week for my doc to either make sure they're all gone or take the rest out. Then we're cleared for getting down.</p> <p>I'm nervous. Not about the pain. Not about discomfort. Not even about Sadie waking up &amp; screaming in the middle. I'm nervous about my PP body. It's a MESS. I felt gorg while pregnant, but my self-image has done a 180 since having her. I've never been skinny, but my stomach is flab city these days. Not only is it loose &amp; jiggly, it's covered in pink stretch marks. My hips have grown &amp; my saddlebags are out of control. Basically, I AM NOT CUTE. It makes me sad. I've never felt worse about myself. And, that makes me nervous for hubs to see me. I'm worried he'll be disgusted. Not only that, but I just can't imagine getting into it. I don't feel sexy at all, and I know it will be difficult to enjoy it when I feel so self-conscious. Ugh.</p> <p>So, tell me... if you weren't feeling particularly hot PP, how did you get into it? How did you get over being worried about your new body? Was it better/worse than you anticipated? </p>