What do you do when, your 6 yo really dislikes being told what to do everyday all the time (eg. can you hang up your school bag, take out the water bottle, pick up your toys, eat your food quickly, go take a shower....etc. etc.), but to you, you wouldn't need to tell him nothing IF he did everything he is supposed to do?

DS has been really difficult the past 2 weeks. He has been saying no, screaming, or doing the exact opposite of what he was told, or flat out lay there and do nothing. We talked about it tonight, and he said he didn't like to be told what to do all the time, but I feel like if I don't say anything, nothing will ever get done, which has happened before. At the same time, I feel resentful that he doesn't listen. This amongst other things that's bothering him / me, which led to daily mayhem for the past 2 weeks.

We have brainstormed a few ideas of what we could do (eg. writing out a to-do check-list on the chalkboard, establish a quiet corner, Say a special phrase when I would like to ask him to speed up, and ask him to refer to the chalkboard instead of telling him what to do). I just feel like this is somehow going to fall through though. Thought I'd pick your brains -- any other clever things you have done, or ideas you think may work/ have worked for you?

Thank you!