I've been having a little dilemma regarding birthday party etiquette. My side of the family only does large parties for first birthdays and baptisms. After that we keep it to our children's grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins.

My husbands side does large parties every year. Including the parents aunts, uncles and cousins. So every year we get invited to his cousins daughters birthday party. When they send the invite they always tell friends not to bring gifts but family is expected to bring a gift and food. Asking people to bring food to a birthday party is one of my biggest pet peeve's but that's a whole other story.

So at this point I'm not sure what to do. I don't invite his cousin to my kids birthday parties anymore. Should I just keep going to her kids parties? They live about an hour away so this isn't right around the corner. I guess I'm just not sure what to do anymore since both sides do birthdays differently.