Hellobee Boards

@snowjewelz: You're right, hindsight is 20/20, and I really do try not to get worked up about what's already done. I'm just naturally a worrier, which gets the best of me sometimes.

It's such a weird situation...his uncle is understanding to a point, and wants things to be tenable for us, but he's also really resistant to change, especially any change that inconveniences him. Just a recent example: he's quite elderly (88 I think?) and his health isn't great, though he's still sharp as a tack. He had been back and forth to the hospital a few times the other week, not with any particular ailment but just under the weather and looking for some validation that something was wrong with him (although there really wasn't). We used to go visit him together an evening or two a week, but since I've been pregnant, we really haven't been able to because I've needed to be in bed by 9ish, which gives my husband I about an hour to have dinner and see each other for the only time all day. We explained this to him, and suggested that perhaps if my husband had a morning shift a couple of days a week we could visit when I got home from work, but he basically threw a temper tantrum and has since been coming up with excuses as to why he needs my husband to do things for him after the business (it's a small grocery store) closes at 8. Like, he intellectually understands that the baby is going to change things, and is excited about it in the grand scheme of things, but anytime it affects him he digs in his heels. And at this point the store is dependent on my husband's involvement in order to run at all, which is why him leaving without us moving isn't an option - his uncle's involvement at this point is more or less on a supervisory level, and they have major issues hiring and retaining for a variety of reasons I won't go into, so when we leave there's an overwhelming possibility he'll have to close the store unless another employee steps up (but not before he runs it into the ground, of course). I totally have sympathy for him in this situation - it sucks getting old, and he also has a lot to deal with with his wife, who is a raging alcoholic (which is its own whole giant can of worms), but he is seemingly incapable of seeing the situation from our point of view.

The moral of this story is never work for family unless you're sure they are sane and rational, LOL.

@MOMTOLITTLEB: I feel you on the no ambition thing! My job/career isn't very important to me yet I have to have to have the ambition to get promoted and get raises!

I'm a breadwinner, too. DH has medical issues and has been out of work the past 3 years so he's at home. I'm hoping our FET works in January so we can finally get pregnant. Long time ago, we agreed the DH would be a SAHD. (He said he would love to be a SAHD) It's still the plan. Though, there are times where my DH struggles to do simple things that I ask of him. I wonder how he will be as a SAHD. Though, it's better him than me. I know this is pre-baby, but I don't think I could be a SAHM. So I'll just work with issues that bother me instead of having to pay for daycare. Though, if he does end up working part-time, I'm some what prepared to put our LOs in daycare part time.

@daisyfay: it does get so complicated when it comes to family it's def not fair to be on your DH to hold up the entire business! And I can't believe your uncle at 88 is still involved! I think when your baby is actually here, you will just have to do what you gotta do since your LO > uncle.

@bluestriped bee: ah my fingers are crossed for you too