Did you guys see this story? I kinda think that her friend was mean to send that in the gawker and I think the whole thing has been blown out of proportion. I dont really see her email as that terrible, I have dealt with brides that were much worse than that. I think if you are asked to be a bridesmaid and cant do it for any reason you should just be honest dnd say it, rather than harbor bad feelings and complain
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Wow, that was just mean of the bridesmaid. She didn't seem very bridezilla at all.
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I don't know, I thought the email was pretty bad - all that stuff about kicking them out of the wedding party if they couldn't afford to come to all of the events/trips? And responding to her within a day? I would be very put off if I got that email from a bride-to-be!
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@JerricaBenton: I understand that. why not just tell the bride that rather than send her email to an internet site.
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I agree. It was bad, but not as bad as people made it out to be. I was expecting worse when I read the headline.
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Uff I thought her email was awful!!! Sorry if you can't afford flights to Vegas, CT AND the wedding in the course of 6 months then you're out. Oh and please send me all the dates of every single time you're planning to be away between now and August and you can't change your plans after this because it's set in stone. I would de-bridesmaid and de-friend myself immediately.
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That's totally true - I definitely wouldn't send it in to Gawker! I do think she gives off the tone of someone who isn't going to listen to a bridesmaid if they asked her to chill out though. If I were sent that email and it wasn't my best friend ever, I would probably just email back and say I'd rather be a guest so I didn't disappoint her! If it was my best friend, I might try and tell her to relax a bit, but I'd probably go along with it all and grumble to myself either way.
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I agree with the fact that she Bride is a bit OTT but, really, the bridesmaid is really nasty. The business about filing her name under spam for sending more than 2 emails a week is just mean. Wow, she should be grateful she has any friends at all, never mind ones that want to honour her by asking her to be a BM.
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@JerricaBenton: Yeah if it came to that, I would just step down politely. weddings are not worth losing friendships over.
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@JerricaBenton: Fair enough, I would never send it to Gawker either. I'd probably just say 'sorry this is a bigger commitment than I'm ready to accept, see you in August'.
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@Mrsbells: Totally agree, unless someone has a pattern of selfish behavior like that, you've got to give a little pass when it comes to stressful times. So many girls get caught up in the whole idea of 'my perfect day' that they go off the deep end! I'd rather get myself out of the situation than get so angry during the process that I hate the girl! That BM just decided to trash the friendship instead.
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Ok, so I've just read this to DH and he says that both of the ladies sound like nasty pieces of work and neither of them would have been invited to our wedding. Lol.
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I think the email was a bit intense! The whole can't be traveling between Jan till August and you HAVE to respond to emails when you're out of the country? What if you're in a third world country where internet is super hard to find/non-existent?!
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I would never send anything to an internet site so I think the bridesmaid went over the top. But I think the bride was totally out of line and I would have immediately stepped down as a bridesmaid.
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I'm curious to hear how the bridezilla is dealing with trying to figure out which one of the "lucky" ten sent the email to gawker. I bet she has a whole new ten candidates now!
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I think they are BOTH crazy and probably deserve each other as "friends".
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I thought the email was pretty rude.
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These kinds of stories are fascinating to me because no one I know IRL is actually like this....and I am so far from type A about things that it just baffles me. And the weddings that I have been in have had brides who are similar. It blows my mind that anyone can even be like this (bride or bridesmaid)!!
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I think the bride wrote an intense email and the BM reaction isn't uncalled for... it's supposed to be fun for everyone, not JUST the bride.
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If I received an email like that, I wouldn't send it to Gawker, but I don't think I would be friends with the bride any more. It's obvious she only considers these girls her worker bees. I hope she regrets it and has apologized.
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I would never send something to Gawker if this was a friend who had asked me to be a bridesmaid...however I'd be rethinking our friendship after receiving an e-mail like this. I think this e-mail is horrendous and it's only the beginning of the hell her bridal party will be experiencing. I'm sure she's down to 9 bridesmaids now
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Well I understand her wanting to plan dates, but kicking people out for not being able to come to every party is extreme!
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Pretty crazy from both sides. It is obvious why they are friends to begin with in my opinion...
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I don't think the email was rude, I think her expectations were rude.
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Email is pretty bad....
I agree @JoJoGirl: The whole thing is awful. -
hahahahaha. oh LAWD.
the bride is a crazypants. i think it's hilarious that the bridesmaid sent that email in. friendship with her is not an "honor" i'd want.
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Bad behavior on both sides but I was appalled at the bride's email. The tone was so condescending and demanding. I felt lucky that my bridesmaids could share my wedding day with me and I was very aware of how much work and expense can go into being a bridesmaid. So I tried to make it as easy for them as possible.
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I've definitely read crazier examples online I think - clearly they're not actually friends if she didn't just email back and say "hey.. you're coming off a little crazy, we're excited but tone it down". I was definitely in a camp that my 3 bridesmaids were doing me a favor by standing up and kept all costs, etc. extremely way down and thanked them but I can understand getting wrapped up in what is really important to you and overreacting/acting out of character.
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The email was pretty terrible. I wouldn't have sent it in to Gawker, but (as others have said) I would have declined to be in the wedding party. I also would have considered whether I still wanted to be friends with someone so selfish. I get that your wedding is important and stressful, but I don't like all of the demands. Three different states, plane fees, expecting people to respond on the same day even if they are out of the country, not being allowed to miss a single event, etc. are all ridiculous.
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The BM is evil and was totally mean! The bride herself is rude and annoying but is simply taking this wedding thing waaayy to seriously which many brides do. I'm sure the BM knew what the bride was like: I mean they've been friends how long?
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Really? I thought the email was AWFUL. Basically, "We're planning all our own parties in four different cities and if you can't come then you're out, and if you can't afford stuff then you're out sorry we can't deal with people and their money problems, and if you don't respond to me right away then eff you." If that's an introductory email, then I would shudder to think what she does later on.
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@ladyfingers: I agree. The bride is awful and the friend has every right to be turned off.
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Agree with @ladyfingers... That was awful!!
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Yeah I'm in the camp of the bride is awful! No way would I want to be near her wedding or even her friend. What an attitude.
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i thought it was pretty ridiculous (but then again, i could barely get through it with all the terrible grammar and misspelled words!), but i don't think i'd have sent it to gawker!
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I totally agree with @ladyfingers. I thought the bride and her expectations were ridiculous! As for sending it in to gawker...meh...it just adds to the epic-ness of her wedding. And I also agree with @Mrs. Cowgirl, the spelling and grammar were atrocious. It's YOU'RE dammit!!
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@ladyfingers: My sentiments exactly!
I think the bridesmaid was well within her rights to out the crap out of that bridezilla. If the bride didn't know she was being extremely crazy by sending the email she should have.
I don't think that we should excuse bad behaviour by brides/pregnant people/people PMSing/old people etc (all the normal reasons we seem to excuse bad behaviour)
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@Mrs. Cowgirl: omg yes it made my EYES TWITCH.
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Oh my God, this bride is heinous! There is no excuse for writing something so rude and condescending to your bridesmaids. In my opinion, if you are so stressed about your forthcoming wedding that you're acting like such a selfish beast of a person, maybe you are not focusing on the more important aspects of a wedding?
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If a bride sent me an email like this...at least you'd know about it ahead of time what a crazypants she'd be! I'd step down.
I had a bride FLIP OUT on me because I wouldn't take 2 days of work off before the wedding to help her with projects. I had just started a new job and had like 7 days of vacation total to last me all year.
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45 comments