When people asked if it really hurts that bad and I said it was the most pain I ever felt, people seemed to think being athletic and having done a good share of grueling workouts would have toughened me up against the pain. Nope! But I didn't realize how common it was to think working out could prevent labor pains.
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I don't know if this is really what you're looking for, but I had a scheduled C-section (my choice) and when I tell people I had a C-section, I've gotten a lot of "oh, I'm sorry to hear that" as the reaction; the widespread assumption being that of course no one would ever choose to have a C-section!
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@yoursilverlining: that's weird of people to say.
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That I had to rush to the hospital once my water broke. I wanted a natural labor and delivery if possible so when my water broke without contractions, I went for a walk to breakfast (about 2 miles total) and that go things moving. It seemed totally normal to me, but a lot of people seem scandalized that I didn't go to the hospital right away! My doctor wasn't worried about it and I didn't want to be on the clock at the hospital. She was born about 7 hours later anyway, so it didn't matter!
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@birdofafeather: People were scandalized when I told them I labored at home for 10 hours before going to the hospital. A lot of people assumed I wouldn't be able to handle contractions (my husband included).
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@Mrs. Sunshine: Yeah, it’s always been kind of awkward since I don't really have any option but to explain I don’t need any sympathy/pity because that’s what I wanted, and what I chose. The conversation always kind of trails off after that haha
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People are shocked when I tell them pushing was not the most painful part.
I have also had two or three ladies tell me "its ok" when I answer that I did have an epidural...thanks - I know it is...I asked for it.
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@Maysprout: I found something similar with working out. I even thought myself that since I worked out I would be able to handle the pain..at least breathing through it. I was not prepared for how intense my back pain was. I was able to manage any contractions I could feel up front, but my back pain was so intense I did end up vomiting. I've never even threw up from a workout before. lol.
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I'm small and my son is big but I know small women have babies of all sizes, all the time. I did end up having a c section, but I don't like when people assume I would have to have one or that it wasn't right for the doctor to let me try to have him vaginally.
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1. walking around always helps labor... my contractions spaced further apart when I started walking around the hospital
2. It's horrible that I took morphine (baby wasn't born until 12 hours after, no side effects)
3. The epidural helps all pain (not when LO is compressing a nerve in your hip!)
4. Hospitals always have you push on your back (I was pushing on my side for a while) -
People assume, especially this time when I had to be induced, that I must just not have had time for an epidural since i didn't have one. I did ask for one too late the first time but my plan going in both times was to avoid one and I did have some time for one both times.
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I felt judged for having a c-section. And a lot of "ohh, too bad". Mostly by women who have never had a child. I think there are a lot of misconceptions out there in general about c-sections.
Mine was an emergency c-section.
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I had to transfer to the hospital from the birth center due to high blood pressure. Mainly because they needed to monitor me after the birth to make sure it got better but unfortunately a lot of people seem to take that as proof of the dangers of out-of-hospital birth.
not so!
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@Autumnmama79: @yoursilverlining: Yes! I was so unprepared for that! I don't need people to feel bad for me, I have two healthy babies and my pelvic floor is intact. Actually people seemed relieved I had a c-section with my second because of his size. I wasn't prepared for that either, or why people even cared so much how my kids were born.
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@travelgirl1: I too was unprepared the first time I heard it. Dh and I had ventured out with LO for one of the first times since birth and I was totally caught off guard! I got all awkward and almost embarrassed
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@birdofafeather: yeah my water broke and I called my DR's office and before I knew it I was in the hospital! What! The first thing the nurse said to me was "your mistake was calling your doctor" haha! I should have stayed home more. Though now that I think about it, it was 7-8 hours between water breaking and being admitted. But contractions didn't start until 7-8 hours after that! D'oh!
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Most people seem to think my labor was easier because it was so fast (4.5 hours). Actually I would have preferred it be longer (not days, obviously, but a little bit). It was VERY intense, and I never had time to even wrap my head around the fact I was really having a baby NOW, or try different labor positions, etc.
Also, everyone assumes she was a c-section because she was early. Which I don't even get. The reason she was early was because she came too fast to stop it. They weren't going to try to hurry things. (Not entirely true since I was bleeding, but no one knows that when they make the assumption.)
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People who don't have kids think it's insane that I pushed for 3 hours. Like every movie/show makes it seem like 2 pushes and you're done! Biggest lie ever.
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I pushed for 4.5 hours which sucked, but I've been asked "what was wrong?" Nothing was wrong. My LO does have a big head but was not malpositioned. It just took a long time.
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@Torchwood: I had a really long slow early labor, and I do think it was beneficial to me in getting mentally prepared, not to mention get accustomed to the pain as it increased slowly. But people are sometime aghast when they hear how long I labored at home (20 hours- but again mostly early, not awful labor).
@Golden: my younger sister asked me how many pushes it took. I was like, I have NO idea. It was faster than I expected though? Her friend had recently told her she did less than 20 pushes and was happy and my sister was like, 20 sounds like a lot (based on the movies).
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@Foodnerd81: 20 soundsike a lot? Oh god. I pushed with almost every contraction for 4.5 hours...so 60-90 probably!
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@sapphire: yeah I told her 20 probably was not very many. I just had no idea- 2-3 per every contraction when I was pushing, however long that was...
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The assumption that as soon as you are fully dilated, you start pushing. I was fully dilated before I got my epidural, although we didn't find out until right after, due to me progressing so quickly. Then it was an hour before my OB arrived. Because baby hadn't descended very far, she suggested we wait another 2 hrs before pushing. Also, I pushed for 4 hrs, which people were really surprised with. LO didn't have a big head, and was positioned favourably, but I had really tight vaginal/uterine/pelvic floor muscles. No one I know (including me), had heard of such a thing delaying birth.
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Every one comments that my labor must have been quick and easy because I was in good shape. I think I was just lucky.
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When I tell people that I was at the movies when I went into labor, they all say they're sorry that I didn't get to see the end of the movie. Then they're shocked when I say that we tayed for the rest of the movie.
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People think that my labor was easy, because it was short.
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@Mrs. Pickle: haha....the LC at my hospital said I must work out a lot since I had such a fast labor. I was like....no, I am super duper out of shape. But thanks anyway!
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A few people wanted me to experience a "real" birth. I've had 3 C-sections.
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One person stated that my doc's desire to have me deliver after midnight instead of right before was some big scheme to get more money from me. Not, you know, my hypertension that forced her to induce me that day....that's it, though!
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@Autumnmama79: @autumnlove: similar. I've had people imply that somehow I got lucky because I didn't have to push. Yes, I didn't have to push. But you also didn't smell your flesh burning as you are sliced open to get your baby. This is major surgery, people!
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People ask why I didn't have a c/s since I was in labor for 32 hours.
not so!
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