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Most of my friends have been med free, only because they had super short labors (4-6 hours start to finish). I had 28 hour labor, an epi and c section, so I was definitely the outlier.
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Most people I know think I crazy for going med free 2x Holla atcha @bpcmarj! Another Pit + no epi girl here
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Epidurals and VBAC's.
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@prettylizy: same here! 2 births without an epi and one with Pitocin. Im the only one in my close circle who didn't request pain meds but I know many women who've had both cesarean sections and vagina births with epidurals. It's a mix.
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My friends have done a little of everything, from one who did a home birth to a scheduled c-section for a non medical reason. I feel lucky they were all supportive of my plan to have ALL THE MEDS, and otherwise not have a plan at all.
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Epidurals. Although a couple's didn't work so they ended up med free.
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@coopsmama: It's split between my friends. Some insisted on epidurals, and others did everything they could not to have one. A couple had c-sections that were out of their control.
I intend on having an epidural (at this point, not pregnant yet) when the time comes. I feel it's a personal choice and would never vocalize my disapproval with someone else's birth plan. It's none of my business.
Although I will admit in the past when people say they want an all natural birth my first thought is 'girrlll, you crazy!'. lol, but I would never say that, just like I wouldn't want people telling me their thoughts on my birth plan.
I would like to have an epidural, and a water birth.... is that a thing? I haven't researched a lot yet... because I'm not pregnant yet ahha. In time.
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Most of my friends had vaginal births and the majority without meds but here every birth is midwife assisted - I suppose that might contribute to it?
I also had two med-free births. -
Epidurals
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We moved after the birth of my LO from a place that is super med-friendly (seemed like my whole street had epidurals and or csections and loved it) to a place that is very natural-friendly. I had a great csection experience with no regrets and now it's funny because my new friends and neighbors say "oh I'm sorry!" and "you can try for a vbac!" when they find out about my CS.
I do think it's great here for people who want all of the options available. My new doctor is totally vbac or repeat friendly, meds or no meds. It's a very positive place. Old dr was great too but definitely believed in getting the epidural, getting an induction on the calendar just in case for 40 weeks etc. I didn't have any problems but if I had wanted a natural birth it would've been discouraging!
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Epidurals and c sections. Only the few med free ones I know have made sure to mention it on FB...otherwise I wouldn't know.
The glorification of only one type of birth annoys me to no end. There is no right, wrong, or better way for everyone
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Everyone I know had an epi or a c-section.
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In my circle, it's a pretty even split. I had a med-free birth because a back issue makes me ineligible for an epidural. I have two friends who went to the same midwifery practice as me (they deliver babies at the best hospital in town and work closely with OBs when it's needed) and we have another great hospital in town that offers laughing gas as an option if you don't want an epidural.
I also have friends and coworkers who are epidural all the way! And, honestly, you are a ROCK STAR/WARRIOR/SUPERHUMAN no matter how you give birth.
Honestly, I think a lot of it depends on what your reliable, trustworthy options for care are in your area. I feel very lucky to have the option for a supported, med-free birth in a hospital setting.
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I only have one friend who had an unmedicated birth. When I asked her what she thought of the experience she said "next time I'll be getting the drugs."
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i know a wide variety of all types of births amongst my friends: med free, scheduled c-section, emergency (and non-emergent but definitely necessary) c-sections, epidurals, inductions, long labors with no meds, short labors, stalled labors.... at the end of the day, we all gave birth and each mama did what they felt needed to be done to get their kiddos here safely and keep themselves safe as well! i love labor stories because each one is different and uniquely theirs!
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@travelgirl1: God bless the gas!!!
I'd say the split is pretty even in my circle, I've got a friend who had three home births and friends who've had two c-sections plus the full range in between.
I've done it both ways and each has their advantages and disadvantages!
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Most of my friends and family have had epidurals. I know someone who wanted a natural birth but asked for the epidural after all and one of my cousins delivered naturally, by choice, but wouldn't do it again.
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Amongst my circle of friends at home in the States, most have had epidurals or if not, it wasn't by choice (baby came too fast!). In Australia and England, most people I know used gas and air, but that was it; I'm sort of the odd man out for choosing to have an epi as soon as possible after admission to the hospital!
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@WinterBee: You can't do a water birth with an epi, as far as I know.
@blackbird: I agree that the attitude that there's a "right" and "wrong" way (no matter which you categorize as right and wrong) is frustrating as hell. I got so tired of the crap I was getting (mostly from my family) that I posted something on my blog to the effect of "I have my reasons for not wanting drugs, a lot has to do with my highly traumatic past experience with labor, so stfu." A little nicer than that though.
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I'm in the US and my friends are pretty evenly divided:
1 - First pregnancy asked for the epidural immediately and had a vaginal delivery. Second pregnancy, had a c-section for breech position. She definitely preferred the vaginal delivery as she thought the recovery was worse with the section.
2 - First pregnancy was going for med-free but ended up getting an epidural at the very end. Had a vaginal delivery and was very happy with her delivery, even with the epidural. Currently pregnant with second and planning to try natural again, but see what happens.
3 - Planned to go natural but ended up getting pre-eclampsia and HELP syndrome and had to have an emergency c-section or she could have died. She is now actually really pissed that her OB didn't induce/section her earlier before it became life threatening. She just got pregnant again and not sure what she's planning for the second time around, but definitely with a new OB.
4 - Two totally med free births, the second of which happened in the backseat of their SUV on the side of the highway! Thoroughly pleased with both deliveries.
So, all over the map but most people pretty happy with how things turned out, even if they didn't go exactly as they might have imagined.
I'm currently pregnant and planning to try to go natural but I have been very clear that I will feel no guilt or shame if I end up needing meds. Mostly I'd like to avoid being stuck in a bed and avoid a section, if I can. But, I've got a flattened pelvic arch, so I'm already at risk to need a c-section. I do have a birth plan, but it talks through natural, meds and c-section, so I'm definitely flexible. Honestly, whatever makes things easier on me is what I'm going to go with.
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@WinterBee: You could labor in the water and then get an epidural farther into labor, like during transition or something! That's what I did with my second and it was great.
You can't deliver with an epidural in the water though.
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@coopsmama: Good to know! That sounds like a great option.
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I think the majority of my friends had vaginal births with epidurals. A small handful had csections.
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I only know 1 other person who has gone med free. It's kind of interesting that people get so huffy about how to give birth. Actually my family told me when I got pregnant again that since I had the first one med free, now I can try this one with an epidural. I birth how only I want to birth and I don't think it's better or worse than anyone else, but I also don't want to hear, "oh you're crazy" "who wouldn't want an epidural?".
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All of my friends have had epidurals or c sections. One of them went med free at a birth center for her second.
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It's pretty split near me, and luckily none of my closest friends have strong, vocal opinions on this topic (or really most other mom fights).
I also felt like the whole childbirth thing was likely to be pretty overwhelming so if there is something that could help me through it, then by all means.
My doctor, whom I trust very very much, had her second child without an epidural purely so she could experience it and better advise her patients. She was all for me getting an epidural if I wanted it.
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Pretty much everyone I know has had an epidural.
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I only know of 1 person that had a natural birth. It's mostly medicated births around here. When I had wanted a natural birth I got some crazy looks from other moms who asked. lol
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Bradley method, home birth, completely med free. Not speaking for myself!
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I know a pretty equal amount of people on both sides. With my first I wanted to go med-free and with the second I wanted an epidural, and as far as criticisms go I heard a LOT more of it when I wanted the epidural.
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Mostly c's and RCS and epidurals around here. I only know one other person who had two unmedicated births and she delivered almost 9 lb babies both times.
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Reading all these responses makes me kinda happy... I mean, most bees are so lucky to have CHOICES for their birth! Natural, epidural, home, hospital, whatever. Medical emergency aside, it's great to have options. And it's great that in an emergency we probably have quick access to technology to help baby and mama. We are so lucky! And all births are amazing... I mean, you grew a human!
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Out of people I know irl no wanted wanted to go med free and no one could believe I did. I had one friend assume I didn't have enough time for because she didn't understand why I'd willingly not have an epi.
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Most of my friends tried for natural births, and many had them. The rest had varying degrees of intervention up to c section. I only have one friend who opted for a repeat c section over trying for a vbac.
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My friends are pretty split between med-free and epidural. I don't know any home births though.
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I feel like I am the exception having gone med and intervention free in my circle. I was kind of surprised.
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Most of my friends had csections or meds.
I really dislike how people who did it one way look down on people who did it another way. I feel like it's personal and as long as mom and baby are ok in the end who should care or judge how they got to that point?? I almost feel like birth bias is worse than the breastfeeding vs formula mess....
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@Mrs. Microscope: yes! I feel so so fortunate that pretty much any kind of birth I wanted, I could find a practice that would be absolutely supportive of it. Pretty amazing considering some stories I have read.
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@Ajsmommy: Agree 100%- birth bias is terrible!
My friends and family are generally super judgmental, and not too quiet with their opinions. The general consensus seems to be that anyone who plans to go med-free is a hippie, and a c-section is a horrible horrible thing. I've told several of them that I'll likely get a c-section (for medical reasons), and they've all acted like I've said I'll likely lose the baby.
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Almost everyone in my circle uses epidurals, I know very few IRL who have tried for a natural. My sister tried and she ended up in an emergency C-section after 20 hours.
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