Having a hard time « Hellobee Boards

Having a hard time

By FaithFertility Oct 28, 2016

So silly to even think this but my daughter was a huge breast feeder and loved the boob.... so I guess I figured my second would be one too.... my son is 9 days old and it has been a fight from the get-go
He was in the NICU for 4 days where he was given a bottle the first two days before my milk came in he nurses with the shields some sessions are okay and some sessions he just roots and cries the whole time I feel bad and usually end up giving him breast milk in a bottle I had the nurse / lactation consultant come to the house yesterday for a visit she said that Anatomy wise he was fine to breastfeed but just seemed aggravated that the milk wouldn't flow I know I have tons of milk I can pump 3 to 4 ounces from each breast within 2 minutes of pumping

I'm hoping it gets better but I'm leaning towards just exclusively pumping it's exhausting to sit on the couch trying to breastfeed for 45 minutes to an hour just end up giving him the two to three ounces in a bottle

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20 comments

tinyperson
pomegranate / 3858 posts

Oct 28, 2016

I hear you...I had a lactation consultant come for a check and was given a plan to switch sides every time she got sleepy (and she was a c section baby so was really sleepy) and to expect to have to switch her 7-8 times each feed! Plus her latch was bad so getting her latched even once was tear inducing...I dreaded having to feed her, what with the pain and frustration. It gets better...but no shame in doing what you need or want to do!! ️
catomd00
grapefruit / 4418 posts

Oct 28, 2016

I'm sorry it's so hard especially with a toddler to look after! We had tongue issues with #2 so I know how frustrating it is. Ultimately, I stuck it out and it quickly got better and I'm glad I did. EP would have been impossible for me. It's so much easier when they get a little bigger. Maybe you could continue with bottles but also keep practicing the latch for less than 45 minutes with the hopes of him getting it as he gets bigger? Could you pump to get a letdown then nurse him if it's a flow issue? Then he doesn't have to work as hard for it?
Miss Ariel
nectarine / 2210 posts

Oct 28, 2016

I'm not sure I have a ton of advice but I just wanted to send some love your way! Hopefully it starts getting easier for you and AJ starts to figure things out.
Iced Tea
persimmon / 1310 posts

Oct 28, 2016

Can you use a supplemental nursing system on the breast instead of the bottles? That way he could get milk faster for a while until he gets used to the whole breastfeeding thing. Plus he wouldn't get accustomed to bottles that way. I used an SNS when my daughter was tiny. I felt a lot better about it; I really didn't want to introduce the bottle too early.

It's pretty simple. There's a little storage area for the milk and a tiny little tube that you insert in the corner of baby's mouth beside your breast. So when they suck, they both stimulate your breast and get extra milk from the SNS.

I'm so sorry you are having a hard time. We struggled a lot with multiple issues, and I'm so glad we were able to get through them. My daughter still breastfeeds at 20 months.

Let us know how things go. Wishing you the best!
FaithFertility
eggplant / 11861 posts

Oct 28, 2016

@tinyperson: Thank you, I feel bad for him! He gets so frustrated!!

@catomd00: I'm going to keep at it! Thankfully DD goes to her sitters M-F and DH is home if not so I can focus on him!!

@Miss Ariel: Thanks!!!!

@Iced Tea: Huh, I'll definitely look into it! We tried using a syringe and put milk behind the shield, that helped!!!!
Adira
wonderful pomelo / 30692 posts

Oct 28, 2016

I don't have a ton of advice, but I'd say if you are interested in making breastfeeding work, don't give up yet! The first two weeks are always the hardest, and I continued to have challenges, even with my second, until at least 6 weeks.

Good luck, whatever you decide to do.
Iced Tea
persimmon / 1310 posts

Oct 28, 2016

Here's a video demonstrating the SNS.
http://www.breastfeedinginc.ca/content.php?pagename=vid-lactaid
FaithFertility
eggplant / 11861 posts

Oct 28, 2016

@Adira: Thanks honestly I think that is the hardest part is it just came so easy with G!
This time I have to guide him, use a shield, hold him properly....lol

I definitely don't want to stop! Thanks for the encouragment!!!!
mrsbubbletea
nectarine / 2821 posts

Oct 28, 2016

@FaithFertility: hang in there mama! I hope it gets better soon.
snowjewelz
wonderful kiwi / 23653 posts

Oct 28, 2016

Aww, hang in there!

I was struggling with K at the beginning... Milk didn't come in right away, found out I had flat nipples, started using a shield, she had a slight tongue tie...

But I really didn't want to EP so I just tried and tried and tried until we got it. The first month is probably the hardest, but maybe hang in there for a little longer before you make a final decision? Either way, sending you lots of love
FaithFertility
eggplant / 11861 posts

Oct 28, 2016

@snowjewelz: Yes definitely hanging in there for awhile! I think my mood was off this morning......after BF for 45 mins to him still rooting/crying and G wanting me!

That is the hard factor at times I feel guilty!
But she is being so good!

I am blessed to have DH until late Nov and G goes to her sitters so lots of boob time for us!
psw27
pomelo / 5220 posts

Oct 28, 2016

Hang in there! My son was also NICU/bottle fed at first and we didn't really get the hang of nursing for a while. Babies are stubborn and also super lazy about their food but it will get better! xo.
PinkElephant
grapefruit / 4584 posts

Oct 28, 2016

I'm right there with you on having unexpected feeding difficulty - it's so hard but sounds like you are committed and doing an awesome job. Here are my thoughts based on my experience so far with baby #3, who is a lot trickier to feed than my first twoDo you need to use a shield? I'm also struggling to fed my early, 4.5 lb baby. The nipple shields gave me some pain relief, but I think she was actually getting less milk with theI've been sort of hand expressing into her mouth while she nurses. I also give her pumped milk in a bottle every other feed (instead of nursing) and supplement after every feed (like an ounce of expressed milk in a bottle). It's exhausting, but the pediatrician and LC swear that once she hits six pounds things will get more efficient....so I'm sticking with what seems to be the most effective plan to get her to that weight quickly! Hope some of this might help you!
FaithFertility
eggplant / 11861 posts

Oct 28, 2016

@psw27: You said it best ....lol
FaithFertility
eggplant / 11861 posts

Oct 28, 2016

@PinkElephant: Yep we are doing the same too! I agree about the shield being a slight barrier....I think it helps for mouth to nipple for body communication I try to let him try with out it once I get a good flow!
bees_knees
persimmon / 1064 posts

Oct 28, 2016

It LO seems frustrated that milk isn't coming asap, I would try either pumping or hand expressing until you let down and THEN latch him. Also, keep working with a lactation consultant. Hang in there, it WILL get better ️
Bernieboo
cherry / 121 posts

Oct 28, 2016

If you have tons of milk, it might be that he gets overwhelmed bc it's flowing so fast? I am 4 weeks postpartum and had my postpartum doula visit last week. She suggested that in the morning (when nursing is hardest for us) and because I have an oversupply, she is getting too much too fast bc of the strong let down and engorgement. She suggested I try the reclined nursing position, as then gravity is helping and baby sucks as much as they want but can also rest without their mouth filling so much. Might not be your issue at all, but another suggestion. We struggled some at the beginning (M is my first), but it's starting to get much better. A couple of friends have told me that there's a magic switch at like 5 weeks when it's so much easier!
winniebee
hostess / wonderful grape / 20803 posts

Oct 28, 2016

Sorry mama! I had a hard time BF my DS1 and switched to EP at 6 weeks. EP is really, really hard though. If you can power in, I would say BF is easier in the end (I BF DS2). So much time connected to the pump and washing bottles etc (in the beginning your output pumping will be absurd but after a while it will be difficult to get that output in 5 minutes.)

I would suggest going somewhere quiet to BF him until he gets the hang of it (like out of DD sight and out of way of TV). If you have a ton of milk, it could be overwhelming him so it may help to lean back as you feed him. GL!
FaithFertility
eggplant / 11861 posts

Oct 28, 2016

@Bernieboo: Never know, I don't think as I see him swallow and he just doesn't stay latched on long enough to get much out or I think his sucking is wrong and he is getting it in little squirts instead of the gulps.....but what do I know....lol
FaithFertility
eggplant / 11861 posts

Oct 28, 2016

@winniebee: Yes, that is my fear pump, feed, wash, keep DD entertained...we can do it now fine with DH home but that wont last forever!

Thankfully G is away most of the day during the week( miss her) but definitely helps to focus on the little guy!

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