LO 1 is 2 and looooves his pacifier. He uses it all day and all night and will ask for it by name if he doesn't have it. It's time to get rid of it and DH and I are terrified! He does have another lovie (an angel dear giraffe) which he mostly uses for sleep. We also have a two month old baby - who has pacifiers, so I'm afraid LO1 will just steal the baby's!
Cold turkey seems too harsh and will cause major meltdowns. Do we do just at night first? Am I allowed to bribe with toys? If I just poke a hole in it I know he will say "it doesn't work" (he's very verbal) and demand a new one.
HELP!!
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No tips for getting rid of it completely, but someone else on here (Hilsy, maybe) gave me the idea of limiting the paci to in the crib.
It look my 22 month old LO a few days to catch on, but I kept enforcing that she had to be in the crib to get the paci ( trying to limit it to only sleep), and a few times she would beg to get in the crib, and I would just put her in there and leave the room and she would have her paci for 10-15 min....but then she would want out of the crib, and I would tell her the paci had to stay in the crib, and she would willingly drop it herself.
Now she doesn't even ask for it outside of the crib.
No idea how we'll wean from sleep times--we're not there yet!
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@Anagram: Yes we just did this. He will see a binky now and say- "Binky is for sleep time!" It was actually fairly painless. Only a few fits.
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@Anagram: I could totally see LO begging me to put him in his crib
thanks for the idea!
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We want to get rid of it for sleep too. He will lose it and cry for it at night, sometimes multiple times per night. He doesn't look for it at all himself, just screams for us to come help.
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i agree with PP. my son is 2.5 and still uses it for sleep but that's it. we limited it to just his room and then limited it to just being in bed. sometimes he'd go to his room for like 5 minutes, but he understood that it couldn't leave the room. now he understands it's only for sleep time. how we're going to break the paci/sleep relationship - i have no idea...
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@cmomma17: Would you consider going cold turkey and toughing it out for a few days? This is what we did with LO just before he turned 2. He actually wouldn't even care if there was a hole in it...he would just chew on it then. I told him he was a big boy and pacifiers were for babies. The first few days were really rough, but he caught on quickly. He would see a pacifier and say, "Baby's binky." even though we don't have another baby in the house yet!
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@Anagram: ha yes that was me! Unfortunately, now we are facing the need to give it up totally
@cmomma17: FWIW, we went to the dentist today and he said that now (2y-2.5y) is the hardest age to get rid of the paci. He recommended doing it earlier or later, like late 2s. He also said that any tooth/palate changes now are not permanent. That being said, my LO's teeth are starting to change (front teeth protruding a bit) so I think tonight I am going to snip off the tip and see what happens. I have already discussed with him a few times that when his paci is "broken" that's it, there will be no more pacis.
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@cmomma17: eta if you're just looking to solve that issue-we fixed that by having it on a clip that we clipped to his pjs. he has no issue finding it at night now.
ETA again that our dentist suggested a sticker reward chart--stickers for every night he goes without the paci, and then he gets a big gift.
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@hilsy85: Duh, the pacifier clip! We need to do that for nighttime. Please let me know how cutting off the tip goes!
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We cut the tip of it a tiny bit each night over the course of about 1-2 weeks (only 1, we threw away the rest). By then, DD only had it for night time sleep but was still super attached to it. She was about ~17 months and understood that it was broken. She would still try to suck on it when it was half cut off and towards the end would still hold it near her face to sleep. The last couple nights she didn't seem to care for it and I said oh yes it's broken, let's throw it away, and she did! I wanted her to be the one to toss it in the trash. That was the end of it. It was a long process but I didn't want to go cold turkey.
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We had to go cold turkey right before LO turned 2. She LOVED her paci. We tried to cut off the tip and she got furious. The only thing that worked was throwing them all away and taking her mind off of it. I think it would have been much more difficult if another baby was in the house that gets to keep their paci.
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@hilsy85: I would love to hear how this goes too! We're coming up on 2 years old and kiddo is going through some kind of separation anxiety right now so I'm hesitant to tackle the pacifier thing now (she's only using it for sleep), but our dentist said the same thing to us last week so I'm definitely thinking about how to approach it.
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@cmomma17: @Mrs. Carrot: I will let you know! He is currently napping with paci firmly in mouth...I am not too worried about night time, since I know he will eventually sleep, more about nap time and that naps will be over for good...!
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We started it by limiting it to his bedroom, and then to his bed/naps and then finally he just stopped using it. I think we got lucky because I can totally imagine it being a complete nightmare if he was still using it now at 2.5. Our dentist made it seem like most people are still using pacis at his age, so I wouldn't stress about it too much! I think the first step would probably be to start limiting where he is allowed to use it.
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@hilsy85: Good luck! I posted something similar yesterday - mine doesn't seem to need it to go to sleep (she sleeps fine at daycare without it) and she won't ask for it if we don't give it to her, but if I don't give it to her, she won't stop talking! It seems to act as some kind of "off" button/sleep indicator for her. We already have a bunch of other lovies so replacement may not be a strategy either so folks have been recommending just cutting it/putting a hole in it to see if she just needs the physical presence rather than the sucking.
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@cmomma17: we did it at 2.5 and our dentist told us to poke holes in them so we did and it worked!
I remember the 1st time he tried to suck on it - he was so confused - he told me it was broken so I told him to throw it away - and then he asked for another and that was broken too!I did it slowly - it was day pacifiers, nap pacifier, car pacifier, then night pacifier (yes we had them everywhere) - took about 2 weeks and he never shed a tear!
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@mauxie: having LO be the one to put it in the trash is a great idea!
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Honestly, we did it on our daughter's terms. Last September, we started telling her that if she gave her Nuki to Santa that he would give it to other babies and then she would get presents. We repeated this mantra every few days to get it stuck in her head and she would repeat it. Consider that she was addicted to the thing and LOVED it SO much, we weren't sure what to expect. She was 2.5 years old when she gave it to Santa and didn't look back. It was awesome!
Could you make up something that will come visit and she could give her paci to? I only say this as Santa is many months out and I'm sure that you want to gone before then
I am SO glad that we did it on her terms and didn't force it. I strongly believe that made it less of a stressful event for her..
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Going along with @northstar, I've heard of parents taking a bag of paci's to exchange for a toy that LO picks out, at the store. I guess you could wink and get the clerk to help you out as if it's a real transaction, hehe.
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I know someone who had their LO put them all in a bag, then left them on the front porch for the paci fairy. The fairy takes them to babies that need them. In return the paci fairy left their LO a new toy as a thank you.
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@NorthStar: I'm all about bribery, haha
I'm thinking about getting some small treats/toys and letting LO pick something in exchange for the pacifier. Then he is in control of the duration and is distracted by a treat!
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@mauxie: Thanks for this! I'm going to have to try this.
@Mamaof2: So, I have been saying, since you posted it, that I would poke holes in his paci to start this. Well, I did it last week. He doesn't even care. He still uses it! Should I poke a bigger hole? haha
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@.twist.: YES! Cut a bigger hole and if you have to cut the whole tip off!
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We got rid of it during the day awhile ago for us it was to encourage more talking. So when we weaned it was just nap and bedtime that she was using it for. And we did cold turkey at that time. It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.
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@Mamaof2: haha I am scared but OK!!!!!!!!!! I will do 1 of 4 tonight.
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Man, E tears the tip off and still tries to use it. We've limited her to naps and bedtime, which I'm good with. Out of sight, out of mind with her. I ain't messing with good sleep before #2 comes!!!
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We only used it for crib time, but when she was about 18 months we cut the tips off. I cut off a bit more than I was planning, but it basically turned into cold turkey and it went so much better than expected. Basically we stressed out more than she did and she was back to her normal sleeping schedule in two days. You can do it!!
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@blackbird: we felt the same! No way were we getting rid of it before baby #2 arrived, or even soon after.
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@.twist.: report back on how this goes for you please! Be brave!!
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We dreaded ditching the paci for the longest time! He had one in his mouth almost all of the time. He was 2 years and 3 months when we just had to cut them cold turkey. All his pacifiers even had holes in them and he still wanted them! And he surprised us and did just fine with out them. We just told him no more paci and that they were all gone. He asked for it for a few days and then he was over it. His sleep wasn't affected at all.
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@mrskc: fingers crossed I'll have a similar experience!
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We also did the Santa approach. He was 27 months and addicted. I was terrified and honestly, it went amazing. Before bed, he put all his pacis in a bowl and left them out for Santa with cookies and milk. Then went to sleep with no problem. He asked for it a few nights after that but was totally fine when we reminded him that Santa left him big boy presents. Never shed a single tear over it. We were totally shocked.
I like @NorthStar: suggestion to make up an event like Santa. I think the act of leaving all his pacis together in a bowl really helped him say good-bye. And Santa brought him a stuffed Pluto doll that he now sleeps with instead.
@hilsy85: Our overall transition was easy, but naps have never really recovered
That's the only thing I miss about the paci!
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Around a year we started doing pacis only for naps and bedtime and she had to leave them in her crib or bed. Then at 2.5 she collected all her pacis and put them in her Easter basket. The "bunny" took the pacis and left tons of candy. Lol DH and I were so scared but she was absolutely fine and nothing with her sleep changed (she now just holds her lovie to fall asleep)
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Update, we cut the tip off the paci tonight! He seemed to understand that it was broken but still was ok with sucking on it
I am planning on cutting more tomorrow and so on, and hopefully at some point he will just be done with it. He handled paci being "broken" way better than I thought he would!!
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@hilsy85: keep us posted! We just put LO to bed with a paci clipped to his jammies so hopefully he can find it himself when it falls out at 4 am. Then tomorrow we are going to start no paci during the day (sleep only). Yikes. A trip to Target to pick out a new big boy toy might be in order!
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No advice. I'm just happy so many other two year olds still have their paci!
My pediatrician told us we should aim to have it gone by age 3, dentist said by age 4.
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N was completely addicted to his wubbanub. We started by only allowing him to have it at nap time, long car rides (2+ hours), and bed time. After a while we dropped to just nap and bed time. One time right after a nap he bit through the wubbanub so I just took it off the pacifier part and closed the animals mouth back up and be still sleeps with the stuffed animal part. Sometimes when he is really stressed he chews on her front horn (it is a Triceratops). There was no fuss about the pacifier being gone.
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@cmomma17: you already got a lot of good advice but i wanted to share our experience too. My LO loved the paci and we started limiting it after a year so by 2 it was really just for naps, nighttime, and long car rides. She somehow decided that when she was 3 she would be too big for the paci so we went with that. We told her she would get a big girl bed at 3 and that would be time to give up the pacis, and talked about it on and off for probably the 3 months before her birthday.
We had her gather up all the pacis and put them in a bag for "the babies at the hospital" (where DH works). The first few nights were awful, and she kept saying "But I need something to suck on". But eventually she fell asleep and once she made the adjustment we all moved on.
Good luck!
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My 2.5 yr old has been clean off the binky for almost a week. That's impressive for her. She was an addict. All day and all night. 24/7. It was awful. I started limiting it to nights. Then I went to work last week and since the sitter had her and her brother there were no binkys taken over there. She fell asleep without it. She still asks for it in the car and at bedtime when she is tired. In the car I say she left it at home. At bedtime I say "I'll try to find one and if I find it I'll bring it to you". I don't look therefore I never find one. Pretty happy with the random binky weaning results.
My sister had the pacifier until she was 3. Since she's an animal lover they convinced her to hang the pacifiers in a tree so mommy birds can take them home to baby birds.
thanks for the idea!
I am SO glad that we did it on her terms and didn't force it. I strongly believe that made it less of a stressful event for her..
I'm thinking about getting some small treats/toys and letting LO pick something in exchange for the pacifier. Then he is in control of the duration and is distracted by a treat!
I am planning on cutting more tomorrow and so on, and hopefully at some point he will just be done with it. He handled paci being "broken" way better than I thought he would!!
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