Hi bees. I'm here because you all give such wonderful advice and I'm hoping you can share your experiences going from one to two children...
I have a 27 month old boy. Our first 20 months or so were incredibly challenging. I believe some babies are born with some extra "spice" and he is just full of it. He's also amazing and intelligent and full of magic and my husband and I love him so much. He has been high spirited since day one—from relentless colic as a newborn to a fussy infant that still hated sleep, didn't ever want to be held, to the toddler stage as fiercely independent early walker with a significant speech delay (which equated to tantrum city over here for almost a full year).
But. Things are getting so much better. We have seen drastic improvement in his behavior over the last four months as he learns to communicate better. He is still very spirited, high-energy, stubborn and independent, so we still really have our hands full, but he's such a bright light and he's funny, sensitive, intuitive, and we are so proud of him.
So here's my issue. My husband and I both feel like someone is missing from our family. We both are on the same page that if we followed our hearts, we would have another (I feel a bit more strongly about it than he does). But logically, we both agree we should not due to all the challenges we were faced with and how hard it was for us to make it through. How could we possibly go through all of that again? A rough pregnancy, traumatizing childbirth, extreme colic, no sleep for a year+, PPD for me (but who wouldn't have that from the constant screaming and no sleep), little help from family, etc, etc. Naturally, this "baby fever" feels totally irrational.
Have any of you had a very difficult experience with your first but went on to have another, anyway? Have any of you decided not to have another because of it?