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@Mrs Green Grass: I would take 2-3 wake ups a night again over potty training. I do not like!
She came in our room this morning, I took her potty, didn't go, but her diaper was full. She asked for a new one and I told, again, the pull ups went bye bye to a baby that needs them. I will say she look adorable walking around with just a shirt on. That little booty!
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Holy resistance batman.
Not handling the resistance so well.
LO to us he wanted to go night night and since it was 9am, we didn't put a diaper on him (and I really thought he was just trying to get a diaper. He covered up with a blanket and peed.
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Holy hell this is exhausting lol. This morning we "threw" out her diapers and I showed her all her new undies she gets to wear if she goes on potty. She woke up dry and drank a lot of water/juice so I kept trying for like 2 hours to go on potty. It's so hard finding a medium between pestering too much and annoying the shit out of her and not paying enough attention.
I eased up a bit and she ended up walking over to potty and peeing in it, so that was good. An hour or so later I kept trying again, following her around, etc. and it seemed like she had to go but wouldn't. She started peeing a bit in her room and I rushed her to potty and she finished in there. Ugh, so exhausting! Lol
The worst part is DHs family is driving me crazy!! They all want us to do something today/this weekend And I told them we are working on potty training bc it's a long weekend, and they basically think I'm crazy for keeping her in house today. Yea, because this is exactly how I want to spend my weekend! I'm just doing it bc it needs to get done, and maybe tomorrow we will venture out.
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@NovBaby1112: just ignore them! She sounds like she is doing great!
@Applesandbananas: Urg!Just put her down for a nap. She hasn't had an accident but told us every time she needed to go. Half she didn't go but the others she did. The first one this morning she went and then wanted her step stool from the other room so she came back sat down and said I have to poop, and did!!
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@Smurfette: that's awesome, sounds like your LO is doing well too! We haven't had a poop yet today. I could tell she was trying one time but not a lot came out. Are you doing pull ups or undies for nap/bed?
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@NovBaby1112: diaper. She is already 50/50 on naps but till she 100% dry not risking. She usually only naps 1.5 hrs so I don't want it shorter. We have been working on it, off and on, since June so I think that is why she is doing good. Fingers crossed it keeps up.
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@Smurfette: wow I'm jealous!!! Go R!!!
LO pooped on the floor today and I took him to the potty mid-poop and he finished his poop and peed in the potty.
After that, he wouldn't pee again. He was ready for nap at 11:30 but would not pee before nap. I told DH to skip the nap diaper and just put him down. I don't want him waiting for the nap diaper to pee. I know he will wet the bed during nap but I don't care.
I'm hoping he gets a good nap, but I am worried he will wake early if he wets. I think a lot of our resistance is coming from being overtired. Maybe I should've just given him a nap diaper
DH put him down so I could run to the grocery, I'm almost home so we shall see how this goes down...
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10 pee accidents (3 of them she started on the floor then finished on the potty).
2 poops on the potty and none in her underwear (I could tell she had to go so rushed her to the potty and we made it just in time).
She got a mini Oreo and a Mr Potato Head after pooping in the potty the first time so now she is very excited about pooping in the potty (at least for the time being).Just put her down for a nap in panties. I'm sure she'll have an accident but I really want her to be able to nap in panties at daycare so we're just going for it. I have pull-ups for her to wear overnight (going to just call them nighttime panties).
Overall it's going better than expected so I hope she keeps it up. I just need her to tell us she has to pee before she starts to go...that's our biggest challenge right now.
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Of course I take my eyes off her for two mins to talk to DH about yet another issue in the bathroom rennovation, and she poops on the rug. At least she yelled Mommy I poopy but by then it all came out
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@lawbee11: I really should just do naps as well. I have a feeling her teachers won't like it though.
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We did no nap diaper, he wouldn't pee before nap and DH finally got him down. When I came back from the store, LO woke up shortly thereafter and was still dry! He really really needed to go though, he was holding himself and kind of whimpering. I finally managed to get him to go to the bathroom (I bought an Elmo potty book with sound effects while I was out and that book stays in the bathroom, it's been quite effective at getting him to the potty). He peed a ton and pooped a ton as well.
He seems to be waiting until he can't possibly hold it anymore before he'll agree to go though
he starts holding himself 5-10 minutes before he'll actually agree to go to the potty. We attempted commando because LO was dying to go outside. I've been setting the stop watch on my Fitbit to just gauge how long it's been since he last went potty and when we were outside, commando, it hit the hour mark. I thought he was starting to hold himself when he suddenly had a huge diarrhea accident. I think if it hadn't been diarrhea, we would've made it.
I'm eager to get onto block 2, before he just becomes the kid who's only potty trained while naked, especially since the blanket incident earlier. I have a feeling it's going to feel like one step forward, ten steps back but I think tomorrow morning we will try commando again, and stay inside this time, that was just too much at once, but I'm glad we did go out, LO had so much fun and it's a gorgeous day.
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@Applesandbananas: don't stress over it. Block 1 can take 1-3 days on average so that means some kids it takes longer. Hopefully the Elmo book will help him to go!
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@lawbee11: that's great! I was debating diaper or panties for nap time but LO actually wanted a diaper on so I wasn't sure what to do...ended up putting the diaper on her, thank god, bc she had a huge poop during her nap
@Smurfette: agh I'm sorry! I'm so scared to take my eyes off her for fear the one second I'm gone she goes... It's so exhausting!
@Applesandbananas: that's great he peed and pooped a lot after his nap though! We are going commando today and will see how tomorrow goes....
So after her big poop in her diaper during nap, we hung out around the house for awhile and age ended up going poop again as well as pee on the potty. We went for a short trip to the park as I was getting stir crazy and she did great!
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No more poops but she did take herself numerous times to go pee. We are going commando tomorrow and even trying a trip to Costco. Fingers crossed!
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@Smurfette: wow! That's exciting!! I still can't quite fathom really leaving the house. We're going to have to on Tuesday for school but right now, even that seems daunting!
I'm rereading like a mad woman, trying to decipher LO's antics. He can and does pee and poop on the potty pretty consistently, prompted. His signals are super easy to see BUT, I really have to push the issue, to get him to go, and if I do, all is well, most of the time.
The rest of the time, it's holy resistance, batman!
One line from the book really resonated with me and, I believe, it is the crux of our issues.
Potty train the child you have, not the child you want.
LO is incredibly stubborn and incredibly smart. He knows what's up and he's not that crazy about it. He doesn't do well with transitions or change and this is a huge change, chocked full of transitions (from whatever activity, to going potty).
I've tried doing a throw away prompt:
Me: Let's go potty.
LO: No!
Me: I'll be in the kitchen when you need to go potty.I usually hear an "oh no!" To which i run in and find that he's started to pee and we rush to the potty. And I feel like most of the time, he's not emptying all the way. The Elmo book has helped keep him on the potty and I tell him I need to hear more pee, I tell him to let it out, etc. (not all in the same potty trip), but I know he's not emptying. For a few of the poop accidents (he's still got diarrhea) I've been just putting him in the bathtub afterward, and he pees in the bathtub!
I think it's behavioral, from rereading the book, and tomorrow I'm going to try implementing an immediate consequence, like taking away whatever activity he's in a rush to get back to.
I'm not really sure what that should look like. Say he's in a rush to get back to watching Elmo (I've been making a big deal out of pausing and telling Elmo to "wait" and LO tells Elmo to wait too). When we come back, if he hasn't emptied fully and has an accident, do I turn the tv totally off and tell him we aren't watching anymore Elmo until he totally empties his bladder on the potty? I'm not sure how to phrase it/present it so that it makes sense. I'm going to reread that section again tonight.
The other thing I wanted to get some thoughts on... I know we're never supposed to ask LO if they need to go, but tonight DH asked LO because he was holding himself, LO said no. DH asked a couple minutes later and LO said yes, and went willingly to the potty and fully emptied (I'm assuming, since he didn't have an accident a few minutes later).
With other transitions, I usually give LO a heads up of what's to come and in this case, I haven't, because I just try to get him to go as soon as I see the signs and that being met with resistance. But, it seems to me like LO can hold it 5-10 minutes from the first signal to when he'll actually come to the potty. Maybe I should give him a heads up, not phrased as a question? Or maybe, given that he's very strong willed, I ask and trust him? I think he'd be more willing to cooperate if it was his decision.
Any thoughts?
Overall I feel like we are making progress, given that this is really his first introduction to potty training and two days ago, none of this was even on his radar!
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@NovBaby1112: Yeah, my LO is in a diaper-hating phase (which is why we're doing this now) so she would prefer to wear panties all the time. She didn't ask for her diaper back at all today and laughed as she threw them away this morning! She woke up dry from her nap which was awesome and unexpected. I did put a pull-up on her for overnight sleep. She kept saying "No! It's not panties! It's a diaper!" Haha oh well I tried...
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@Applesandbananas: I wouldn't count on asking him yet. I can ask R and she says no and then 5 mins later say I pees in my pull up. So I made sure to not say it today. But you can always try it.
I think you know your child the best so if you think taking away stuff will work then by all means do it. I am not sure how you can do it emptying the bladder. Maybe try turning off the TV when he has an accident, and then the next time he goes, say remember when you had an accident and lost TV, make sure you finish going so that doesn't happen again. -
@Smurfette: yeah, I don't love the idea of asking him, although it did work out for DH. I think I need to be better about giving him a heads up at the first hint of a potty signal, that we are headed to the potty soon. Maybe that'll cut down on some resistance.
I'm also desperately hoping tomorrow is a little easier because it's day three and maybe he'll start to come around to the idea of full time potty use? One can hope...
Still debating whether to go for another naked day or to go commando.
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We are on the tail end of OCPT potty training (started a month ago), so I have been reading along with this thread and cheering everyone on from afar! It sounds like everyone has really made a lot of progress in just a day or two!
In our experience, the process hasn't been linear. We think he's mastered one block and then a few days later he regresses. It took about 4 days to truly move on from Block 1.
And even weeks later, I still have him run around the house without bottoms on because it's so much easier for him to make it to the potty that way. Block 2 also took a while- perhaps a week or so? And even then, we had to go back to Blocks 1 and 2 after we introduced underwear. It was a winding road for sure!Despite the advice in the book, we ended up using rewards (a bag of small toy cars that once belonged to DH when he was a kid) to get him more excited about trying those first few days. Once he got towards the bottom of the bag, he self-weaned off the reward system.
I totally went overboard on liquids the first two days. I think he had a lot of accidents because he had boxes of apple juice racing through his system!
I'm sure there are some magical kids who nail it in three days but it's taken us a month and we're just now starting to feel comfortable keeping him in underwear overnight and on longer trips out of the house. We had a lot of power struggles ("NO I don't need the potty!" and then an accident two minutes later!), and times when I was ready to give up. It's so exhausting! But other people reminded me that they are just learning and it's a big adjustment for them, and to try to give it time. I'm glad we stuck with it (last Saturday was rock bottom for us but then he had a near perfect week!) and I kind of regret all the times I stressed us both out. He really was trying all along, just at his own pace and comfort level.
Sorry that this is long and rambly! I've had potty training on my mind a lot this month!
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@QueensBee: thank you for sharing! It's so good to hear from someone "on the other side" so to speak! That's a great point about it not being linear. Does your LO go to daycare? I'm trying not to stress because we are two days away from that but it's definitely on my mind...
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@Applesandbananas: Happy to share! I'd say we're *almost* at the other side, lol! He does go to daycare, but I'm a teacher so I spent a week at home with him this summer and didn't feel the same type of time constraint as a 3 day weekend. He had moved onto Block 2 but was still having accidents, both commando and bottomless. I was the crazy mom who sent a super long email to his teachers describing his whole potty situation. The teachers were very reassuring. He did have accidents there but they totally expected it and didn't mind. Eventually, he learned to "give it a try" at daycare. The teachers had all the potty-trainees line up to try the potty every hour or so, and the peer pressure helped him to sit and give it a try, even if he didn't have the feeling. He came home one day saying, "It's okay, mama. If nothing comes out, nothing comes out!" and I know he heard that at school!
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@QueensBee: that's really reassuring! I gave daycare a heads up a couple weeks ago (and a reminder on Thursday) that we were potty training this weekend and gave a super brief synopsis of OCPT. They were really on board, so I'm hopeful it goes smoothly!
When did you move to commando?
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@QueensBee: the back and forth is what I am afraid of. Is he wearing underwear now to school?
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@Applesandbananas: After three days, we started taking a walk around the block commando but I still kept him pantless at home. It took about 4-5 days until he was commando at home too, and then it took about two weeks to move to underpants.
For us, I got really frustrated when he regressed with poop. When we first started, he was able to do poops in the potty starting on day 1. He only had accidents with peeing. Then, once he started to get the hang of peeing, he had poop accidents each day, even if he was running around without pants! It felt totally backwards! But eventually, it all came together and now he can do both.
@Smurfette: It's such a pain! And can be really discouraging! Hopefully, since R started earlier, you've already been down most of the bumps and winds in the road, and it will be smooth from here!
Yes, he is underwear all of the time now, even during naps and bed. It took a while for him to get the hang of pulling them up and down but he finally has it.
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Day 3 is off to a bad start. LO managed to get poop in the potty almost first thing, although it was a pretty hectic dash to the potty. As soon as he was done (literally like 5 seconds, but it was a pretty hefty amount, so I didn't press the issue) he took off running.
I couldn't get him back on the potty to pee, so I dropped it for a little while, but he was showing such intense signs, I tried to get him to the potty. The little potty, the big potty, nothing worked.
In the book, there's a letter from a mom who basically made her LO stay in the bathroom until he peed in the potty, so I attempted that, but it went downhill really quickly, ending in LO slapping me in the face pretty hard.
Hitting is automatic time out, so I put him in his room, knowing without a doubt, he would piss everywhere. And he did. And I tried to get him to help me clean it up, but he just thrashed around, screaming that he wanted to go night-night (he'd peed all over his bed). I handed him off to my husband, who was kind enough to call me a psycho (he's been oh so helpful...)
I'm at a loss. Clearly I need to back the hell off. I think LO really wants privacy, based on his antics with trying to cover up to pee, so I'm just going to try my best to back them eff off. I also put him in shorts, on the off chance that providing him a little privacy with the shorts might help (although I think it's actually going to hinder things even more but we have to cross that bridge sooner or later).
Hope everyone else is having a better day.
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I decided I didn't care if he wet his shorts, we were going out to play and maybe if he wet his shorts and it took us awhile to come back outside, it'd make an impression. He wet his shorts just a little and immediately told me, so we hurried inside to the potty, he sat, peed (fully!) and washed his hands. We changed his shorts and headed back outside. I'm going to keep the same laid back approach for a few wet shorts (although I told him pee goes in the potty, not in our shorts, just so he doesn't think it's okay) and see what happens. I know I need to lay off.
I'm trying not to feel pressure. Daycare knows he's going to have accidents so there's no pressure there to have him fully trained by Tuesday. I just know he can do it and know that he's being stubborn, but I know where he gets it from (heh, me). So I need to just let go of the other end of the rope so there's nothing to fight about.
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He drank a full sippy of milk about an hour after his first wet shorts incident and I decided to prompt, he shut it down real quick, so I decided to just let it go. This time he peed a ton in his shorts, put a little in the potty, and seemed much less cooperative overall.
I was talking to my mom about his unwillingness to go to the actual potty and she suggested hiding the playdoh, except for one can in the bathroom, that he gets to play with during/after he goes.
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@Applesandbananas: I'm struggling too with how to react/what to do when LO refuses to try to go on potty. I don't want it to turn into a power struggle or make it something unpleasant for her, as she is very stubborn as well.
Today is going pretty well- she woke up last night with a completely full diaper, even though she peed right before bed. I'm not sure if it's bc of all the fluids we gave her yesterday, or if it's bc she's holding it more? Not sure yet. When she woke up she took off her diaper and went right over to her potty and peed without me prompting so that was good! She also did a small poop and another pee before her nap on the potty.
I'm trying to give her lots of liquids but it doesn't seem like she is going that often- maybe every 3 hours?? Yesterday she peed about 4 times on potty and pooped twice.
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@NovBaby1112: it's so frustrating because I have his signs nailed so I know he has to go, which turns it into a power struggle REALLY fast and the whole situation just deteriorates rapidly.
I'm thinking about doing something really crazy.
LO struggles with transitions, but at the zoo, we have a really great routine and it's so easy to get LO to go from one activity/exhibit to the next. I'm thinking about taking him to the zoo and just using the potty as one of our transitions, in between the monkeys and the elephants lol! Maybe it'll help me not be so intense about it! I know we've both felt much better in the two times we left the house, and all we did was play in the yard!
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We started potty training a week ago with no real 'method' to speak of. We just put him in underwear, stayed home and went to the potty frequently. The first few days he read books while on the potty and the first ever time he went poop he got a jujube.
First day was lots of little accidents, second day was awesome, third day was half and half (like he'd run to the bathroom but not quite make it). Since then he's pretty much self directed - goes in by himself, no accidents, etc. we make sure to take him before & after immediately when we leave the house - actually I just realized SO took him out in just underwear & pants
right now. Eep!
We also kept him home from daycare Monday-Wednesday but grandma was visiting so we would have kept him home anyway whether or not we were training. Thursday he came home in a pull-up (which i was expecting) but dry and Friday he came home in underwear. So fingers crossed he keeps progressing there.
We still do a diaper for naps and night time and I have a feeling he's holding his poops until then. But he's always been a right-before-bed pooper (like he gets dressed for bed and is in bed for like a half hour before he comes out & says he pooped). so I don't know quite how to fix it. Any suggestions?
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Well we have run errands twice today. This morning we were gone for two hours and she peed twice while out. She took almost a 2hr nap, sans pull up, and woke up dry. Then peed once she woke up. We did a grocery run after nap and she stayed dry. We got home and she said her tummy hurt, so DH took her to the potty, and she tooted and peed. But of course not even 10 mins later she was in her playroom, and just as I was walking in there she told me she pooped. So now I am just letting her go commando till our friends get here for dinner. Hopefully I can catch her poop tomorrow.
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@Smurfette: wow! Go R!! Peeing twice in a public bathroom?? That's impressive! I took LO to the zoo for an hour today. I thought he had fully emptied before we left but as soon as he got strapped into the car seat, he peed
but I had lined the car seat with a towel so it was not a huge deal. I brought several pairs of shorts so we just did a quick wardrobe change before we went into the zoo. I always stroller him around the zoo, so it was impossible to catch his cues, but since he'd just peed, it was also pretty unlikely he'd pee while we were there. I still took him into a bathroom and ew...I brought the insert and he got up on the potty and told me he was peeing (he didn't, but I didn't really think he would) and then he found the feminine product disposal... So. Disgusting. I was standing right there but he still managed to stick his hand in. Ugh, so so so gross
i think it was empty, but still!On the way home, I told him we were going to say hi to daddy, then go potty, so when we got home, that's what's we did. There was a little bit of protest from LO (he wanted to cover up with a blanket so I knew for sure he needed to go) so I put him on the little potty in front of Elmo and he peed.
I feel like once we bust through this resistance, we'll be golden. We had an instance today when we were outside playing and having a great time and he told me he needed to pee!
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So she pooped again in the potty, so that was awesome. But then she was up late cause we had friends over. The Mom and I were talking on the couch while the girls watched a movie. It hadn't been that long since she gone last but she told me Mama I peed in my pull up. I guess she forgot she didn't have one on, so pee all over the couch. I was just getting ready to take her. But I know she was exhausted so I feel like this one is my fault. I put her to bed right after. Onto day 3.....
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@Smurfette: That still sounds like an awesome day!! Is she verbally telling you when she needs to go most of the time? LO told me once, but I found that when we were out, it was really hard to catch his cues. Maybe I just need to have him try, when we get someplace, and rely more on his pee pattern than his cues?
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@Applesandbananas: it is about half and half. Some we tell her, like before we left the house both times and this afternoon I saw I her holding herself. But then she was playing at the table and she said I need to go pee and that is when she peed and pooped. But half the times she says she needs to go and she doesn't.
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@Smurfette: how did you know when to take her while you were out?
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@Applesandbananas: I just went by the time, about an hour. Then we went to the next store and she told me she needed to go but it had only been like 25 mins since the last time.
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@Smurfette: that's awesome! I'm trying to muster up the courage to go to Target this morning.
LO got up super early and since we do a nighttime diaper, I wasn't sure whether he was up for the day or not so I kind of delayed taking off his diaper.
When I finally realized that he fully intended on getting up at 5:30, I took off the night diaper. He showed signs of needing to go, but it was an hour of prompting (and pestering) before I got him to go on the potty. He didn't empty fully and had a little accident a few minutes later.
He was really really holding his bottom but would NOT sit on the potty to poop. I finally got him to sit like 2 seconds before it came out.
Again, he didn't fully empty and peed on the floor (quite a large puddle) and then peed in the potty too, and about 30 minutes later, he was trying to cover up with a blanket and go "night-night" (which he does when he needs to potty, because of the night night diaper).
His diapers have definitely been wet in the mornings and I loathe the idea of waking him to go in the middle of the night, but I'm wondering if the night diaper is making the mornings hard? He gets better as the day goes by.
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Sounds like everyone is doing well! In some ways I wish I had a week home with her to do this, but in other ways I am just ready to get back to school/work tomorrow and hope she does ok. I have to remind myself she is going to have accidents and it's not going to go 100% perfect, and that's ok. Potty training is a gradual process and I think we've done a good job the last 2 days of making her more comfortable with the potty and giving her a chance to go on her own.
Last night she refused to wear a diaper to bed, so I told her to try and pee one more time on potty and she could wear her undies to bed, so she did. I ended up putting her in pull up in her sleep bc I was too nervous about accidents but she actually woke up dry and then went pee on potty right away. Going to attempt some short outings today, we'll see how that goes....!
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@NovBaby1112: wow! That's awesome! LO was really wet but I think the nighttime diaper is really messing us up
Good luck with your outings! Let us know how it goes!!
You're so right about no one expecting it to be perfect. I keep reminding myself that no one expects him to be perfect. I'm so hopeful that daycare will help him. His biggest issue is resistance/stubbornness, so I'm hoping that the peer pressure helps (I think half his class is potty training!)
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