DH and I are expecting our first child this fall and were discussing whether or not to give him/her a middle name. DH is from a culture that doesn't use them, so he doesn't see the point. On my side, everybody has a middle name - often passed down from a relative as a way to keep family names going.
Would/did you use a middle name for your child(ren)? What reasons can you think of to use/not use a middle name? Curious to see both sides of this!
71 votes
squash / 13208 posts
Both my kids and everyone I know uses middle names so that's what we did too!
We use family names.
However, if your DH is strongly against it I think its ok to not have one
wonderful pea / 17279 posts
We used a middle name. Middles are the norm.
My parents gave my bro and I female/ male versions of the opposite sex parent's own middle name. Those names passed down a piece of them, but that is not the norm in my family. Everyone else just has a second name their parents liked. My husband's family appears to be the same at least with his immediate family in terms of choosing a name they like.
Our LO's middle name will honor a member/ side of my family. I don't know if subsequent LOs will be so lucky, but they will all have middle names.
grapefruit / 4584 posts
In your particular case, it might be a great way to incorporate a name from your DH's culture (if you're giving the baby a more "mainstream American" name), or vice-versa, if your baby is getting a very specific cultural name/name in another language, to give them a more common English name they could use in certain situations if they chose to do so.
persimmon / 1188 posts
I like middle names. We both have family names as our middle names and gave our son a family name for his middle name. It's not a rule but I'm sure we were influenced by how we were named!
grapefruit / 4045 posts
I like middle names, but I don't see a real need for them. If it makes the name nice, then I would add one or two! I actually don't have a middle name - my first name is a long name. I've never had a problem not having a middle name.
pomegranate / 3113 posts
My DH is also from a culture where middle names aren't the norm and doesn't see the point. However, I didn't change my last name when we got married, and though I didn't mind giving DD his last name, I wanted my name to be part of hers, too. So it made perfect sense to give her my last name as a middle. Otherwise, I probably would have pushed what @pinkelephant suggested, which is what lots of our friends have done.
kiwi / 595 posts
My daughter's middle name is my last name. I didn't change my name so it's nice for us to have that connection and I like that my heritage is acknowledged.
wonderful kiwi / 23653 posts
We both came from cultures that don't use middle names. But we do have one for DD. I say go for it if you have one, don't if you can't come up with one! DH wanted DD to have one since we have a common last name.
pomelo / 5607 posts
DH and I both have to use our middle names a LOT because we have a common last name. I feel like it's just useful, even with an uncommon name there are so many people out there it could happen.
Also, I changed my nickname multiple times growing up. I would have resented not having as much to choose from.
nectarine / 2210 posts
My friend's dad didn't have one. But he's a dr, and he picked a middle initial to use professionally. And technically his birth name is a nickname and for his professional name he also goes by the full length version.
persimmon / 1114 posts
I have no middle name and I grew up hating it! Plus no one believed me when I said I did not have one; they all assumed it was so awful I was lying so I would not have to shareS
pomegranate / 3392 posts
I also come from a culture that doesn't use middle names, but we gave our LO one because hey, free name!
One reason I can think of not to have a middle name: it can have religious significance. My cousin lives in Germany and there, the second name is traditionally the Christian name, and he's not Christian so he didn't give his kids middle names.
clementine / 911 posts
My grandfather didn't have a middle name, and I guess he always felt his name was a bit incomplete. He was a little odd, so he just started making up middle names for himself. He would leave some interesting ones on our answering machine... (He always felt the need to state his full name for some reason.)
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