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I think almost everyone has these feelings when they begin TTC. And I'll have to agree with your mom, there is never a perfect time to start.... I will say that despite having those feelings when we started I am 100% happy we did when we did! Good luck!

I was terrified when we first got pregnant about paying for daycare, but it did all work out and now I'm terrified of paying for 2 in daycare, but soo sooo excited to have these two babies! A friend had also told me once, that if you wait till you're ready it'll never happen. Jump in! Motherhood is amazing.

@LittleBook: DH is sooo not a worrier, he always comments, don't worry, it'll work out. Super hard for me to believe that but so far he's been right.

I think you kind of have to figure out your best and worse case scenarios. What happens if you do have a baby, what are you going to have to do to keep your life going? Are you willing to take a step back from your work or do you want to continue, what does it mean? Maybe also make a budget...don't get caught up in what you think things cost, do some research, find out what options are out there, you might be surprised.

@LittleBook: I think it's natural to be worried about what will undoubtedly be a big change in your life. I have no doubts that this will be a positive change :). And that unfortunately, your worry is just beginning! Sometimes it feels like parenting is nothing but a sequence of worries. It's still worth it.

And if it makes you feel any better on the daycare front, I think putting my daughter in daycare was one of the best decisions I ever made for her. The socialization, the learning, the play -- they've all been hugely positive for her, and I have no doubts that she'll be well set for kindergarten. And yeah, the paying sucks, but somehow it all works out, and now I just look forward to that blissful time when I won't be paying for daycare (if all goes as planned, in about 5 years! ha!)

@LittleBook: Information is power, I've long said that. And don't worry, you can still plan stuff, just maybe not to the level you were used to before...or you find other ways to use your planning skills!

You have 9 months to figure out everything after you get pregnant- hopefully you have some leave time so your kid won't be going to daycare for 16 (give or take) months arguably. Unless you live in a highly competitive daycare city- you have lots of time to plan.

FWIW I never thought I'd be a FT stay at home Mom and that's how it worked out for a year. It was not a good fit for me so I'm back working for myself PT this year.

@LittleBook: I don't think there is so much as the "perfect" time but a "better" time. You figure out what works because you have to. We had a "scare" while I was still working on my master's but now I am looking forward to TTC #2 (sort of) this spring.

I didn't read all the replies, but I will say that I was very anxious when I got pregnant. I was worried about the huge adjustment I would have to go through. But I didn't decide to have a baby because of any of that. Simply put, I was confident that I would regret not having a child later. I knew it would always be a hard adjustment, and there is never a convenient time to do it. So my present self ripped off the bandaid for my future self. The rest of the timing is just, well, details.

If you're worried about daycare financially, start "paying" for it now.

Once DH and I figured out who much it cost in our area, we started setting aside that much money into a savings account each week so we could save up and also get used to not having that money in our budget. And then we figure, when we do have a baby, we'll have some savings to help with unexpected finances so we won't feel as strapped.