I'm pretty good at tuning the kids out, so whining doesn't really get to me too much these days. But when the kids don't listen, it drives me crazy!! I finally had to change up how I asked the kids to do things, because what I was doing wasn't working and was driving me insane. If I'm not paying attention though, I can fall into old habits and then the lack of listening will send me back to the loony bin!
What bothers you more: whining or not listening?
clementine / 830 posts
@mrbee: not listening. That sends me into a rage real quick. What did you change about the way you ask??
coconut / 8430 posts
Both!!! But I think not listening is worse.
@mrbee: Will you tell me too?
honeydew / 7444 posts
@mrbee: can you tell me too please? She is going through a not listening phase and really testing my patience!!!
pomelo / 5524 posts
Whining for sure. The not listening thing, I can try to get around or get past, but the whining really grates on my nerves.
nectarine / 2180 posts
@mrbee: oh please do share! DD is almost 4 and the not listening thing drives us both batty!
persimmon / 1171 posts
I like to believe "not listening" is a sign that my LO is independent. (it let's me sleep at night, don't burst my bubble 
) But, whining? I can't. I make her go to time out when she whines, she sits there as long as it takes for her to calm down.
GOLD / wonderful olive / 19030 posts
Hmmm, it such a toss up right now, both are things we battle daily. I think the not listening, she will straight up tell me "no" and keep doing it...um I don't think so child! Makes my blood boil like I have no control over my girl!
grapefruit / 4800 posts
Not listening by a lot. I don't like whining but when my kids don't listen it makes me reevaluate what activities we can do. I feel like not listening can become a safety issue so it makes me nervous when they tune me out.
persimmon / 1183 posts
I already posted whining earlier but I think I'll expand.
Working in child development, I can see how kids could be overwhelmed by information and directions. We teach them to focus and concentrate and to prioritize their time etc. So "not listening" can likely be attributed to one of those things. The "ownership" of not listening can be equally carried by the child and by those around him/her.
With whining, the onus is 100% on the child. How you speak and express yourself to others. I know most parents try hard to instill good manners with please and thank yous. Many lead by example and I'm certain that parents don't go around whining to their significant others. So whining is likely a peer learned behaviour used to manipulate.
And that's why I feel whining is worse.
pomegranate / 3375 posts
I'd say whining. I'm a stickler for using effective communication, and I just hate when people (of all ages) whine. That said, my kid can't talk yet, so maybe I should revisit this in a year or so! 
wonderful pear / 26210 posts
Whining, because my son knows better than to do that. He's 4 and can use his words but his laziness sometimes takes over and I have no patience for that.
apricot / 320 posts
Whining. OMG the whining. Its correction is dependent on my ability to ignore, which waxes and wanes.
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