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My 4.5 year old is incredibly sensitive. There are times when he's so mad at me for not doing what he wants me to do that I have to let him know that he's going to sit in timeout for a bit unless he changes his attitude. That usually seems to snap him out of whatever mood he's in, but not always.

He seems to have a hard time understanding that things cannot go his way all of the time. He has an 18 month old brother, but there is never really any jealousy.

Things that I say to him that help are telling him that I know he is a nice boy, but right now, he's not acting very nicely. He prides himself in being a nice person, so it's bothersome to him if I think he's not acting appropriately. This focuses on a positive of his, and allows him to understand that he IS a nice person and should start acting that way rather than telling him something negative upfront and then trying to follow with a positive when the negative has already brought him down.

These mood swings are tough, and I commiserate!

@gummyB: My DD also went through a very rough patch when she was 5. I was flabbergasted since we never really went through any "terrible" phases with her like many kids have. She was a model student at school, so focused, but would fall apart at home for no good reason. Like a 45 minute, thrash her body session. We were walking on eggshells. I have to say we never really figured out the answer per se. Things gradually just petered out by around age 6. I did take her to a therapist once for an evaluation. That ended up being more like a therapy session for me more than anything. But things really settled down around that time, or we definitely would have continued. I think 5 is hard because they are still lacking some self-awareness. You might try some sensory play for her, or making a "calm down spot". I noticed that my DD is very calmed by playing with sand, stuff like that. Get her doing that stuff to diffuse a situation was helpful before it became a full blown tantrum. But really, some time and patience got us through that patch. Also, I would say - she is 8 now and still a VERY intense person. She is a control freak and still has a hard time coping when things don't go her way. But as she has gotten older, she has become more self-aware. She knows when she is freaking out that it is not an appropriate response for the situation and has some of her own "methods" for self soothing. Such as, there is a song from the cartoon Steven Universe that she sings to herself that talks about everything being ok. Also, we do spend a lot of time talking about things in advance to try to manage her expectations. But life happens! You can't control everything and that's what they need to learn to cope with. Lots of luck to you, I feel ya!

@gummyB: You know what my kids love, is stuff like silly putty, slime, etc. Maybe that's something portable you could try. And what I mean by being self-aware is.. they have to want to soothe themselves... if they want to throw a tantrum, then they are going to do it. That's why it does get better with age. Maybe you could try some incentives too.