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Alright ladies, so the wondfo & middle test are this morning, bottom negative is from Tuesday. My FRER from Tuesday was not easily accessible cuz I threw it into a different trash can. It's faint but there. Not the solid line I would think there should be but it's something I guess. I'm a bit nervous now!
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@Happygal: I am so over clomid. I actually have two more months worth that I filled but I kind of doubt I'll ever use it. after it destroyed my lining I have little interest. I'm thinking a few months on femara as a starting point. and YAY for this cycle coming up for you - hope it does the trick!!
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@Happygal: PS we are moving out May 22, stuff should be arriving in Dallas around June 1. I made the appt for June 5
also I am amazed/sad to see everyone's painful HSG stories. I didn't realize how lucky I was to have it be pretty easy on that one!
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@FliegepilzHut: @FaithFertility: @Happygal: @Kelli_Deluxe: @mrs. bird: @bhbee: Thanks ladies! I'm trying as hard as possible not to get too excited. I had just accepted my next step and ready to move onto the IUI when I was caught by surprise that the test turned positive this morning.
I'm actually wondering if this might be a chemical pregnancy because of the faint line. But no use in worrying what I do not have control over. 
@Kelli_Deluxe: my RE's office is maybe an hour and a half from work. My commute to work is about an hour without traffic. And the IUI appts take place between 10 and 12. I'm way too tired after the trigger shot to drive myself to work. DH will go to work after our appts and stay later but I'd prefer to be able to relax at home.
@swedishfish: @CupQuakeWalk: my RE says that its not useful for me either! At our initial consult with him, I was diagnosed with hypothalamic anovulation and the OPKs (he recommended clear blue fertility monitor) may help but would get pricey since I don't ovulate regularly. After the first two rounds of femara, he said to ditch the OPKs because they don't do anything for me and asked that I always come in for CD13 monitoring. BUT I can't help POAS. It gives me something concrete that I feel like I am doing something productive in TTC.
@Happygal: sorry about the spotting. I love your positives!
@FaithFertility: FX for great betas for you!
@mrs. bird: eeekkk! I hope my situation is similar to your BFF!
@mrs bunchy: I think its helpful to have an idea about what you are willing to consider. I would definitely have pen and paper ready to jot down notes during the WTF appt. Also, if your RE says that they want you to do certain procedures, ask for the protocol because different clinics might have their own protocols. For instance, all IUIs in my clinic are done the very next day after the trigger shot (and only one time), while I've seen that some clinics might have back to back IUIs (maybe 2 days after the last IUI).
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@lazypanda: Yes, worrying does nothing, continue the hope!!!!!
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Thanks for the support ladies, looks like I'll be starting on the clomid today on CD4. My April Fool's wanding and trigger played a cruel joke on me. IUI here we come!
My 3 positives:
1. I can drink tonight, last week RE said I can drink while taking clomid!
2. If I had a CP, at least I know there's a possibility for sperm to meet egg.
3. My biggest positive would have to be the ability to share all these roller coaster emotions with everyone on this thread. The crushing feeling from not so great news is softened by everyone's support. Thank you ladies!
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@lazypanda: I love your positivity!!!!!!! That dang trigger shot can throw you for a loop! I love all the support on this thread, it is so up lifting! Have a wonderful weekend!
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Just got the call, numbers are 7,000 :)))) my progesterone is a little low so I started Crinone today, he does not seemed worried since my numbers are great!!
I told my mom today :)))) FELT AMAMZING!!!!
Thank you all for your prayers! Know I do the same for you daily!!!!!!!!
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@FaithFertility: yay!!! I'm excited for you!!!
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@lazypanda: i think you've earned a nice big drink! i'm sorry, hun! onward and upward!
@FaithFertility: woohoo!!!! that's wonderful!! i'm sure it felt amazing to share such beautiful news with your mom, she must have been thrilled
@bhbee: have you taken femara before? i had great luck with it getting my cycles going again and no side effects.
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@FaithFertility: yay!!!! Sooo happy for you!
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@FaithFertility: happy happy news!!
@mrs. bird: I've never done femara, mainly because my current (now former) clinic has a policy not to prescribe it since it's off-label usage. my RE said were it up to him he would try it, and I know my new RE uses it so I'm going to request it as a first step. while I responded to clomid, I hated the side effects so I'm really hopeful femara may do the trick. I've also heard anecdotally of it helping with chemical pregnancies so here's hoping!
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@FaithFertility: That's great news!!! Happy Easter!
@lazypanda: Sorry it wasn't a BFP. FX for you this month!
3 positives:
1. I've got two friends so far looking into IVF recommendations in their respective cities...and I'm going to start making appointments.
2. Husband and I finally got some yardwork done this morning.
3. I have an awesome-smelling lemon cake in the oven...hopefully it looks and tastes as good as it smells!
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@bluestriped bee: So glad you have a diagnosis and are moving in the right direction! Also, DH's morphology sounds freakin' amazing! I didn't even know it could be that high!
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@lazypanda: If insurance covered it, I would try the IUIs for sure. And you don't necessarily need to take a whole day off of work. When we did our IUI it was just in the morning. You could request the very earliest appointments in the day.
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@lazypanda: Ok, so I totally responded early and hadn't read your most recent posts! I'm so sorry about your false-alarm positive tests! That's so frustrating!
I totally would have had my hopes totally up. Blergh. I'm glad you're able to move on to IUIs this month though. Sending you the best of luck!
@bhbee: Good luck with your upcoming move! I know moving and packing are quite overwhelming for sure. -
DH is the music director for our church, so this week (Holy Week) has been quite crazy with a whole lot of church.
It's been very good though. We're just pooped. In the IF dept. DH got his most recent SA back and it's overall pretty good, but that stupid morphology is still stuck at 1%.
We are considering doing IUIs during our adoption wait (our RE has a clinical trial we might be able to be a part of, so they would be free), so hopefully we can get in touch with him this week. Our hearts are really in the adoption realm, but if we have the chance for free treatment, we would hate to pass up the opportunity. Right now I'm just very, very grateful that spring has finally arrived!
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@Mrs. Pinata: that clinical trial would be awesome!! hope it all works out in a good way for you.
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@Mrs. Pinata: That sounds amazing! I hope the clinical trial is available to you guys, IUI can def help in that morphology department!
I bet this week was crazy! We went to our church today, haven't been in a long time, it felt good :)))
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@bhbee: @FaithFertility: Thanks! It was brought up as a possibility after we started the adoption process again, so we'll just see if anything comes of it. At this point we don't feel like IUIs are likely to give us a BFP, but at least we can say we tried.
One step at a time, so cross your fingers for us that we get in the study! -
@Mrs. Pinata: I've got my FX for you! I still wanna say how amazing and strong you & your husband to be fost-adopt parents! I hope the free a treatment works for you!
@FliegepilzHut: thanks! Do you make your lemon cake from scratch?
@bhbee: Femara did not work for me but my RE had said the positive for Femara was that it does not thin out the lining. Good luck with all the organizing and packing for your big move!
@mrs. bird: yes, I definitely enjoyed the taste of the wine...but then started feeling somewhat guilty. However, as you said, I'm moving on!
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@lazypanda: I think you may be thinking of Mrs. Polish. They're fostering right now. I also greatly admire those who foster and foster-adopt! Right now we're in the "waiting" phase of domestic infant adoption.
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It's great to see so much positivity on the IF boards. When I'm behind and haven't been here, IF is my first stop
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@lazypanda: yes (from scratch)! I would be happier if it had come out a little moister (i.e. if I'd taken it out of the oven a couple of minutes earlier), but all in all, it was pretty tasty-- and very fragrant!
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@bhbee: I'm over clomid for you! I think you'll like Femara.
@lazypanda: I'm sorry, but as always, I'm impressed with your attitude about it all.
What kind of wine do you like?@FaithFertility: hooray! What did your mom say?
@FliegepilzHut: how did the cake turn out? I love lemon anything.
@Mrs. Pinata: oh, I"m sorry the results weren't better. How did he take the news?
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Easter was great with my large, loud family. We had a wonderful time. Not so wonderful, however, was my period being late and me getting my hopes up. My period started this morning and the cramps have been worse than usual (anyone else experience that post-lap cycle?) "Just keep swimming," is what I'm telling myself. Drugs have been ordered and are set to arrive tomorrow.
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@Happygal: Ugh. I'm so sorry. When AF is late that's the worst because it gets your hopes up.
Actually, we were pretty happy with the results because we weren't expecting any improvement and his count and motility were up quite a bit, so he (and I) were disappointed that the morphology wasn't better, but overall happy with the results so we tried to focus on the positive. After doing this for about 3 years now and not really any hope of a natural BFP our expectations are pretty low. I guess that's sad, but it feels more "freeing" if that makes sense as there's less pressure that we HAVE to get pregnant. -
Good morning! I hope everyone had a great Easter weekend!
We went out of town as planned and it was't as bad as I thought it would be. SIL was actually pretty tolerable, nothing crazy happened and we had fun. It was just a super busy, non-stop weekend so now I'm at work with a triple shot latte hoping to wake up enough to make it through the day. I've been so exhausted lately it's ridiculous!
Dh and I talked a little bit on the drive out there, not to the extent I had hoped but it was something. He talked about how MFI effected his ego and how it feels for him. That's a HUGE step! Usually I can't get anything out of him. We also talked a little bit about IVF and how we're both in agreement that it's not something we would do. That's about as far as we got but it's a start!
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@alohaorchid: That's great! MFI really is a horrible drain on most men's egos. Wish you both the best of luck!
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I have a confession to make.... there was a lot of kids there this weekend (ranging in age from 2 weeks to 15) and I didn't get "the itch", I actually felt the opposite. I couldn't wait to go home to our quiet, tidy house and relax. Almost all the conversations all weekend were related to kids and if they weren't talking about kids, they were talking to the kids, or talking about recovering from pregnancy. The entire weekend was all about kids. I was bored and desperate to talk about something else!
I held the 2 week old baby a couple of times and he was so cute and really quiet, yet I didn't feel any kind of yearning for a baby... I just thought, yeah he's cute, he smells good, here you go.
It was just weird. I've never really been a kid person, but for the past few years I have gone from never wanting one to being heartbroken that we have IF, then yesterday.
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@FliegepilzHut: Thank you! I knew it was tough on him because he said something once before but talking about it this weekend really helped it hit home for me just how hard that would be on a man.
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@alohaorchid: That's interesting fodder for another discussion with DH, right? Happily married, no kids is not a bad place to be...as long as neither one of you REALLY wants kids. You may just be a lot more evolved than I am (definitely can't hold a 2 week old baby without completely losing my mind! Sadly.)
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@Happygal: Grrr late AF messing with you is the worst. This happen to me last cycle.....
@Mrs. Pinata: I'm glad to hear that there were some improvements in Mr.P's numbers. Will this be the first time you have done an IUI?
@bhbee: I'm glad you will get to try Femera, I had a good experience on it although my clinic does require you to sign a waiver that it is an off label use and that it has not been formally studied for use as a fertility medication
@FaithFertility: Congrats! When will you have your first US?
@lazypanda: Sorry about he uncertainty with your test. Did the RE have you do a beta to see if it was chemical?
@alohaorchid: I am so happy you and your DH were able to chat in the car at least a little and that he shared with you some of what he has been through.
I still have crazy baby fever so I couldn't have held such a small baby. I hope you are able to figure out how you want to proceed.
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Sorry I didn't respond to everyone, we were all over the place this weekend and today is the first day I have been able to sit down and catch up with everything that is going on!
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@alohaorchid: Ha! I experienced the same thing. My nieces and nephews were great and I had a wonderful time, but when we went back to our hotel room, I thought, "Ooooh. This is nice." I also know my sisters were looking at me holding the baby and thinking sympathetic thoughts for me, but I had zero baby fever from it. But I'm usually that way. I've taken care of babies since I was 12, so I know how much work they are. I think they're special, but I don't get crazy baby fever. I like them when they're around six or seven months or so, and I love toddlers at around 4.
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@mrswin: Thursday!!!!!!!!! :))))) EEEEKKKKK!!!!!!
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@Mrs. Pinata: oops! Sorry, but it's still admirable to have a domestic infant adoption! Would you have to complete the same home study & background checks as you would to fost-adopt?
@mrswin: my beta was negative for pregnancy. The advice nurse I spoke to over the weekend said that it's possible that it was a CP. So I'm gonna go with that & see it as, at least I know sperm was able to meet the egg.
@alohaorchid: yay for a productive discussion. I'm on the other side of the camp. I love holding & playing with babies. However, since having difficulty TTC, it's been a little harder to go see newborns.
@Happygal: ***my update is 4/28 wanding and potential trigger. With having taken clomid a day later my IUI may be scheduled 36 hrs after my trigger, depending on whether or not my follicles are the right size or I surge on my own.
I hope everyone's had a great weekend and all ready for the new week!
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@Happygal: Sounds like a good holiday, I am happy that you ordered your meds and are ready for the what next! Sorry AF is being a bi*ch
@alohaorchid: I am glad you and DH opened up to one another, I can only imagine how MFI can be, as we know how it is on the other side!
I too at times feel that way with kids.......I am a teacher and a baby/kid lover, but I at times love the fact that our home is quite and we can sleep in and such, I think. That is normal, means you enjoy your life and the things in it @lazypanda: Best of luck to you with your IUI
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@mrswin: We did one IUI about 2.5 years ago, but IUIs aren't really too helpful for morphology and at $1,000 or so per try we decided that if we really wanted to get a BFP we'd need to move forward w/IVF w/ICSI. This trial will do TWO washes on the sperm, to hopefully just use the best sperm there. If it's free I suppose we'll have to try it! FX we get in touch with the RE this week!
@lazypanda: I think in foster-adopt all the costs are paid for, but I imagine the process is pretty similar. We definitely had to do a lot of background check stuff! -
Hi friends! Gosh, it's been a rough day or so. About 3 weeks ago we were told our profile would be shown to TWO different expectant mothers, so we started to get excited we could have a baby soon. 2 weeks ago we found out we weren't chosen by the first expectant mother. But, we were holding out hope for the second situation. So, we've been waiting for about 3 weeks for our profile to be shown to one particular expectant mother who is due next week. It's been a whole lot of ups-and-downs as they kept telling us they would show her profiles, but then the birthfather was hard to get ahold of, etc. But, we found out yesterday that we weren't picked by her either. And we're a lot sadder than we thought we would be since we had been imagining this as a possibility now.
Then, last night a very dear friend (who has struggled with IF and failed IVFs) told me that she's 10 weeks pregnant with a natural pregnancy. I'm THRILLED for them, but as this is her second pregnancy, it made me sad for us that we have never been able to get pregnant. I hate these mixed feelings, but the news just came on a bad day since I was already sad about not getting picked.
So, please send positive vibes if you can that we can get in touch with our RE about the clinical trial, because if we get the news that THAT won't work out either, I will just be so bummed because that's a whole lot of bad news all lumped together. Sorry to be negative. It's just what's going on here with us.
Sending positive vibes and prayers for all of you too!!
I'm actually wondering if this might be a chemical pregnancy because of the faint line. But no use in worrying what I do not have control over. 
I totally would have had my hopes totally up. Blergh. 
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