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@grizz: another social worker here and I 100% agree with you. I'm fortunate that DH is completely on board with this, despite being in a completely different line of work (finance).

It is extremely important to me. I was in a community service fraternity in college. I will definitely encourage them to give back and help others when they need help.

I"ll definitely teach my LO about charity and volunteering. I think the root of it all is gratefulness and empathy. I plan to teach my LO that while hard work is extremely important in being successful, luck plays just as big a role. We are very very lucky to have been born into our respective situations, and if we had been born into another situation we wouldn't have any of the opportunities or advantages that we take for granted.

I think making sure LO has that sense of gratefulness for the incredible luck of your situation is super important (rather than the "I'm successful because I work hard/I deserve everything I have/poor people are poor by their own doing" mentality). And it makes charity/volunteerism a natural next step -sharing the gifts you were given to those less fortunate.

It's important to us that our child become the kind of person who steps up to do things no matter how thankless or unpaid. My school and parents really encouraged volunteerism and taught me a lot about why it's needed in the world, and I want to pass that on.

Volunteering and charity are an important part of our lives, and we will teach our children about them as well.

We give not just to charities that help people with direct services, but also to public radio and research organizations that depend on donations. We have had to stop because we don't have much of an income currently, but will resume when we are able.

I want to find a local place to volunteer with LO especially at Christmas... but throughout the year as well. I always have and it is hugely important to me. I think it is an important part of being a part of society.

That doesn't really mesh with our ideas about what it means to be a good & productive member of society. Someone with an advanced degree running a nonprofit supporting the elderly or abused children will make & pay little in taxes, but the good they've done in their lifetime far exceeds that of one of the many corrupt CEOs running businesses who pay themselves astronomical amounts while avoiding taxes whenever possible & refusing to pay workers living wages, sure they might spend more $$, but that doesn't make them better people. There are things in this world that cannot be bought, but still need to be earned, like what mr. bird & I believe to be a good & productive member of society, you earn it, but not with a paycheck. Acts of service & generosity are very important to us & we will require that of our children as long as they live with us.

I don't do any volunteering now that I'm out of college, but I do make it a point to support certain organizations and I want my kids to understand and appreciate everything they have. I wish I could say I am leading by example, but aside from helping out my sorority and some military organizations, I'm not. It wasn't emphasized at all when I was growing up.

For both of us volunteering and giving back is part of being a productive member of society. I've been volunteering since I was a teenager and was an active volunteer for the past five years (mentoring teens weekly). I now work for an organization that wouldn't have survived without its network of volunteers. It's so important to us to have LO be of service to people/organizations/causes that become important to her.

I think if you want to rely on taxes as your contribution to society, it's important to:

1) Make sure tax revenues are adequate! Vote YES for school levies, for example. Don't vote to cut taxes, especially for the highest earning companies and individuals!

2) Fight to protect programs that taxes support, like SNAP, Meals on Wheels, Social Security.

To answer your question, yes, I plan on teaching my kids about volunteering and charity. But I think you hit on something very important - taxes are a huge way in which we contribute to our communities. I want to teach my kids why we pay them and why we are proud to do so!

@looch: Who is judging? From what I'm seeing of the replies people have varying definitions of what productive members of society means, for some that's getting a good job and paying taxes, for others that's doing those things + volunteering. None of these definitions are wrong.

@looch: Huh? I was talking to the OP.

DH and I both feel passionately about giving our time and energy to charitable groups. We actually would much rather give our time over writing a check. LO will be encouraged to do the same.

But being a hard working person who makes money and pays taxes is also a priority over here. We hope she winds up doing both, not one or the other.

I want to teach my children to be part of the community. I don't think everything someone does should be paid, people help out one another in a community, which makes a community stronger than when it's every man for themselves.

Being a productive member of socirt in NY opinion is one where you give back. Ppl have hardships in life (look at generational poverty for example) and some ppl are disadvantaged greatly from birth (and of no fault of their own) and in my opinion it is our responsibility as humans with the means to help them to do so. My son will absolutely be helping people.

This kind of reminds me of a convo I had with my cruise table. One couple was Europe, I think Sweden, and a pair of girlfriends were American. The couple didn't understand why the rest of us KAmericans) felt the need to give back through Church, civic organizations, non-profits, and any other ways to lend time or money to helping strangers. As much as we all love a good rags to riches or bootstraps story, helping others is ingrained in our culture. Seems like the best way to spend Federal holidays is committing an act of service. Students get rewarded for volunteer hours through academic societies and scholarships. Even if you don't promote it at home your LO will be exposed.

I do think volunteering is important, but maybe not in the traditional sense, like go to an agency and do some work that is set aside for volunteers. This is important, too, but if I'm honest, I very rarely do it. But I do believe in being generous of my time, talents, and treasures, whichever happen to be applicable and available to a particular situation. Like @Silva: we like to donate to public radio, which is one way of giving back. I also try to make a yearly donation to my alma mater when funds allow, and I designate it to a specific fund that helped me when I was in school. As kids, we also loved to participate in projects like the Angel Tree at our church over Christmas, where you buy for someone else. That's something that I want to continue with our kids.

What I remember growing up, though, wasn't trips to food banks or how much money my parents may or may not have given. Rather, it was the support they lent to hurting members of our school and church communities. When someone's loved one passed away, they always brought dinner, checked up on them, went to visitations. They made a point to see people in nursing homes and would sometimes bring us along. If tragedy struck a family, they would offer to clean and do shopping. It made a very powerful impression on me, and I hope to instill that kind of selflessness that my parents showed in our kids, as well.