My coworkers and I were talking today about delivery and we were split about 50/50 if our spouse stayed with us at the hospital post-delivery. For both my girls, DH stayed with me all 3 (4 with DD1) nights to help since i was recovering from my c-section. DD1 was in NICU so he'd go down with me every feeding, and DD2 he would change her diapers and hand her to me for feedings. It was a lifesaver and i liked that he went through the process with me.
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With our first he stayed the whole time (2 days). Wth this second one I think he will probably stay the first night and go home to our toddler the second night, assuming my recovery is similarly easy.
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He stayed the whole time and did every diaper change, swaddle, etc. I was recovering from a rough deliver of one twin vaginally and one c-section so I needed all the help I could!
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Yup! He held her all night the first night so I could rest. I think he and DD will stay in our family suite the next time!
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yes he stayed with both!
like a previous post mention there was no nursery - babies roomed in and I wanted the help!
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Yes! I think for future #2, I'd ask him to stay one night and then go be with DD or something.
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@Foodnerd81: that's what we did. DH stayed both nights with LO1 and only the first night with LO2 since we needed him with our older child.
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He almost didn't, because the hospital was full and people were double-rooming Bergen a private room opened up and he was able to stay. Not sure what we'll do this time, since we have a toddler! I hope he can stay at least the first night.
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@Greentea: I actually would never have trusted DH to hold her at night! He slept so much heavier than I did in the hospital and I don't think he would wake up if she rolled out of his arms. He didn't even wake up when she would cry in the room. Very annoying when *I* was the one who just gave birth and was recovering.
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Yep - I can't fathom him not being there. It is his new infant too!
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Yes! Even with my second for 2 nights.
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@Mrs.KMM: seriously though!!!
Yes. He stayed for both but I was only there for one night each time.
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He stayed the entire time.
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Yep, Hubs stayed the whole time for both babies' births.
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w dd he was with me the entire time. for ds, he was with me the first night as i delivered early morning, but he went home at night with dd after ds was born. i preferred this as my labor was not complicated and i wanted dd to have someone familiar with her when she woke up in the morning. he came with her early the next morning. during that night he wasn't there i just nursed ds on and off all night so theres not much he could've done to help with anyway. it worked for us!
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lo2 : we only stayed a night so he stayed. And we could fit all three of us in the bed if we snuggled.
lo3: he stayed the night I was being induced (on a fold down chair) in the birthing unit, but only stayed the first night after lo was born at 10pm since all they had for him was a chair that didn't even fold down. He went home the second night. I didn't need help, baby was in NICU, and he had barely slept the night before so I totally understood.
(My mom was taking care of the boys so he could stay).
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He stayed the first night but the fold out chair he had to sleep in was so uncomfortable I sent him home the second night. He was keeping me awake with all his tossing and turning! I wasn't getting any sleep as it was, I needed what little I could get. The room was so tiny it was actually better because I could move around a little more without the chair folded out.
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He did from beginning to end with DS. I know he wants to for DD, but we need to figure out what to do with DS since no one else has ever put him to bed or spent the night with him!
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Yep my husband stayed the whole time. I literally couldn't move so he did all diaper changes and swaddling and handing me the baby.
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He stayed with me and he will for #2 as well. DS1 will be with my parents and he is totally comfortable with them so no need for him to rush home to the toddler. He will want the bonding time with baby.
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Both times we've lived close so he went home to get a good nights sleep and I sent baby to the nursery for a couple of hours. Both times we didn't get any sleep the night before so I want him fresh so he can help with baby the next day then both being still exhausted. Then the 2nd night he spends the night and we leave in the morning.
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With my first he got me dinner, then stayed the first night, then baby went to the NICU the second night for jaundice and I commuted from my room to the NICU every 3 hours and pumped like crazy. He went back and forth after that, but slept at home with the pets. I got the nesting room for the next couple nights, and he stopped in regularly, but it was a tiny closet with a pull out couch, so there wasn't much room at all.
With my second he stayed until we got put in a room after the birth, then I sent him out to get me In N' Out Burger and then home to bed. I felt better with him staying with our oldest instead. The new baby was the easy part, I just got to nap and snuggle with him in the bed, it was the best!
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I had 2 c-sections. With LO1, he stayed both nights. With LO2, he was supposed to stay both nights (our families were helping with the toddler), but the first night he ended up with a kidney stone. He was in the ER for a few hours and then went home (awesome timing!).
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No he stayed late - 1am with our first and 11:30pm with our second - but went to sleep in his own bed. He came back early the following morning. It was fine for me.
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No, because partners are not allowed to stay in NHS hospitals here in the UK. You are on a ward with several other ladies and their babies - partners are subject to visiting hours.
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@lilteacherbee: wow thats straight out of friends (when phoebe gives birth to triplets and joey has a kidney stone!)
i'm guessing everything ended up well now but thats pretty crazy
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Both times he stayed. With our second, his parents stayed at our house to take care of DD1 and our pets. My dad did pet duty with our first.
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I was there 2 nights and could only have one overnight guest, so DH stayed one night, and my mom stayed another. Out house is only a mile away from the hospital, so I liked having someone with me while the other person could go home, shower, etc.
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Lo1: lo was born at 10.56pm and we didn't get up to the ward until after midnight, then dh had to go home because I was in a room with 2 other women and their babies and partners weren't allowed to stay. I had to stay in hospital from the Thursday night to Monday afternoon and so did all the night time stuff by myself.
Lo2: I did my aftercare at a birth center after birthing at the hospital. Dh stayed with me the first night but went home to be with lo1 the second night. I'm hoping when we have a third I can do aftercare at the birth center again and dh will hopefully spend both nights with me.
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@kodybear: Haha yes! I had several friends tell me that (I'm apparently crazy and have never watched Friends
). I thought he was being dramatic, but when he told my nurse where it was hurting, she suggested taking a trip to the ER. It was an interesting night, to say the least. My nurses were AMAZING that night because I literally couldn't do anything but feed the baby!
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With my first he stayed both nights and did all of the diaper changing, swaddling and soothing. I was in charge of nursing and recovering.
I just had my second 6 days ago and he did not stay with me. I delivered at 1:38am, was settled in my room around 4am and I sent him home. We have no family in town so my friend and her 2 year old came over to stay the night when my water broke (my toddler was already asleep when it happened). I was worried about my toddler waking up and not having either of us there. I was recovering from a c section but had pretty amazing nurses so I told him to go home each night to be with our toddler. I don't regret it at all. I didn't have family offer to stay with my toddler so the only other options were to pay our sitter to stay at the house each night or rely on friends. I just wanted as much normalcy as possible for my oldest.
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He stayed the entire time both times. We actually joke that he gets his best nights' sleep at the hospital, he was always snoring haha. I think that he gets so excited and worked up that he crashes, just like a little kid.
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He stayed the entire time for LO 1 and stayed the first night for LO 2 & 3.
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LO1 - stayed the whole time, overnight for 2 nights
LO2 - stayed majority of the time, but went back home to help with bedtime and morning daycare drop off, stayed overnight 1 night (discharged the next late afternoon)
LO3 - we'll see, I'm inclined to say he will stay for most of the day but will go back home to the kids at night. I think I'll be OK overnight and could always call my mom to help.
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DH stayed with me every night.
Next baby, my mom will stay with me and DH will stay at home with LO.
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I was in the hospital for 17 days prior so DH did not stay, but I do wish he would have. It was really tough figuring out how to pump all by myself. But that was the only reason for him to stay...lo was in the NICU and we couldn't even hold him for weeks.
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I was in the hospital 4 or 5 nights with preterm labor, he didn't stay any. For the birth of DD yes he stayed with us 2 night. For DS, no, DH actually got sick and We both decided it was best if he didn't. It sucked cause I really needed him. The Dr even kept me and DS an extra night, 3 total, to keep us away from the germs.
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DH stayed the entire time.
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With our first DH stayed each night. He left a few hours each day to go home and shower etc (we lived 10 mins from hospital).
Second time DH stayed one night. I sent him home after first night to be with our son and actually sleep. He went back to work the next day so I had zero help after being home.
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We had our baby at home ... so yes!
i'm guessing everything ended up well now but thats pretty crazy
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61 comments