Hellobee Boards

I don’t really understand what a “god famiky” is. Are they actual god parents or is this just something honorary?

Honestly, I think the woman’s just a probably snob and insecure. She wants to fit in with the new neighbors and she doesn’t want them to think she’s friends with the help.

I wouldn’t confront her, but I also wouldn’t make an effort any more. Put the ball in her court to keep up the friendship.

it sounds to me like the relationship means something different to you than it does to her, which hurts you but probably not her. it's sad, but friendships and relationships die sometimes. from your description, I don't think it's a situation where there's anything to "do" other than mourn it, move on, and spend your energy on people who love you and value you in the capacity you want to be treated. if she's not treating you the way you want to be treated, there's nothing you can do or say to procure it. she's not going to start caring about your daughter in a reciprocal way just because you want her to.

@Stardust17: I'm sorry she treated you that way. I'm a little confused though...arent you more invested in the lives of her children (as opposed to her being involved in DD's life) because that's what you were hired to do? Are you a nanny and you happen to be close to the family or are you a friend who sometimes babysits? Sorry if I am totally missing something, but I am trying to understand the dynamics of your relationship.

@Stardust17: I see. I agree with @LCTBQE: that you should put your efforts into surrounding yourself with people who want a reciprocal relationship. I'm sorry that your relationship is ending in this way.

Do you believe she would introduce your daughter as her nanny’s kid or as her goddaughter?

I can make a pretty good guess based on what you’ve described and that’d be a good sign to move on. Sorry - this is so sucky.

@Stardust17: this may not be helpful now, but growing up my dad lost touch/had a falling out with my godfather. But when I was 6 or so my parents asked my best friend’s dad to be my godfather. (Her mom was my brother’s godmother already.) there was nothing formal that happened and he never did anything official, but I just wanted to give you the perspective that you could change godparents at some point.

On a completely random note - is she is widow now? You refer to living w them when her husband had a bone marrow transplant and then said that the mom (not family/they) bought a new house. Just wondering if she has had some huge life stressors/transitions too and is feeling insecure (though this is an immature response to that stress...)

@Stardust17: hate to be the bubble buster here, but I’m not understanding the “I practically raised her kids with the impression.she would do the same for us...” How could that be if she hired you to to help her with the kids? I mean that would signal to me she doesn’t have a whole lot of extra time to be involved in someone else’s child’s life. Maybe I’m wrong and she has nieces and nephews or other close friends kids’ and you have seen her prioritize their events and activities. Overall it’s sucky that her move coincided with treating you differently and dropping the friend part of her introductions. When you attended her kids swim class were you working or was it on your free time?