My hubby will be out of state for my first ultrasound next Friday. We don't really have the option of postponing. If your husband couldn't be there, would you try to take a video of it to show him? Would you take your mom or MIL or just go alone? Trying to decide. He's not super upset about missing it, since it'll only be 6w3d and he knows you can't see much at that point. But, still.
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I went to my one at 6+5 solo and they gave me a little pic. He came to my next one at 12 weeks.
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My husband has missed one of three so far and I just paid for a few pictures at the end. We aren't allowed phones or other recording devices during scans so that wasn't an option, and I didn't feel the need to ask someone else to come with me! They only let your partner/whoever else in for the last few minutes here, anyway.
That early I likely wouldn't even ask for pictures since there isn't a lot to see anyway.
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My husband hasn't been able to come to any of mine! Just me and my 2 yo. Actually today, they did an ultrasound cause I was in the ER after fainting and falling on my face (ugh
) and my husband was there since he had to leave work to come take me, and so he got to see for the first time! (At 19weeks). He can't come to my anatomy scan next week either.
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@CatchAFallingStar: My husband has lost the option of not being there. In the past, I went alone.. At that appointment I had a MMC (it was my third ultrasound, so we'd seen the heart beat and steady growth before, so this was a shock). Having gone through that alone, I would bring someone with me. The appointment will like go well, but if it doesn't you want someone who can listen to the options and drive you home.
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My first ultrasound with my RE after BFP my husband didn't come. It wasn't a big deal since there wasn't a ton to see.
If the transfer from yesterday works he won't be at that one either. It just doesn't always work out, ESPECIALLY if you already have an LO (my REs office doesn't allow kids in the office so someone needs to stay and be with him. Obviously it can't be me. Lol.) I think missing ultrasounds is more common than you'd think.Just curious why postponing isn't an option if you really want him there? Is that the REs rule or you just don't want to?
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I just showed him the picture!
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To clarify- of course, I'll show him the print out. I just meant that I felt bad that he won't be there to hear what the doctor says and see the heartbeat flicker, etc. But, I think we're both OK with it and he'll be there for the subsequent ultrasounds. Thanks for all your opinions!
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My husband came with me to my first ultrasound and I had a missed miscarriage. After that he never let me go to a first ultrasound alone. We had another miscarriage after that and for DS1 he came to every single appointment and ultrasound, but it was a higher risk pregnancy. For DS2 he went to the first two because he wasn't measuring right so we were worried about another MC. After that he didn't come to any more because the baby was progressing fine, we had a toddler to look after, etc.
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After three losses, I'll never go alone. I was alone for the NT scan last pregnancy when I found out our baby was dying from Trisomy 18. I only went alone because every scan up until then was fine.
Being alone made it even more traumatic. I schedule them around DH's schedule now. Even just my 6 week follow up with my OB led to a panic attack.
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Same as a few posters...after a MMC at 10w, DH has insisted on being there for every 1st appt and u/s. I have an initial OB appointment in a couple of weeks and told him I'm fine to go alone but he's insisting he wants to be there, which is sweet.
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My husband only went to the very first one, but that was bc we had to answer all the history questions and I wouldn't let him off the hook for his family history! He never went to any of the others and he probably wouldnt' have gone to the first one except for me making him.. I'd just show him the pictures....
ETA: I was also high risk for both my pregnancies and received regular ultrasounds.
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He was out of town for the first one with our 2nd. I asked my Mom if she wanted to come. She loved it. It was super quick but she really appreciated being there.
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When I was pregnant last winter, I had four ultrasounds and my husband wasn't able to come to any of the first three. I got bad news the third one (still hb but not growing) and while I wish he could have been there, it would have sucked regardless. My mom is 2000 miles away, so no option to have her come.
At 6 weeks, I think you'll pretty much capture what there is to see with a picture My hospital doesn't allow photography but this time they did give me a picture at 6 weeks and I think it's super cool - baby is just a blur but I'm still happy to have it.
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He saw the first one with DD1 but it's because I was in the ER. With DD2, I was also in the ER but he wasn't there because he was with our other daughter. I've also had several L2 scans that he wasn't at because of his work schedule.
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I brought my mom, I was more concerned about getting bad news alone, and she was so excited to get to see a grandbaby on the screen. She was there when I found out the gender, DH said we could find out (it was early) and then I surprised him at home.
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I've done it both ways. With lo1 I didn't know there would be an us and I just brought home the pic. At this stage a recording wouldn't show much more than a pic unless you get the hb.
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My husband had to miss our first ultrasound during my pregnancy with LO and it was hard because our first pregnancy was a missed mc discovered at the first ultrasound. He also missed the anatomy scan for LO2, which was after another missed miscarriage (although I was fairly certain every was ok for LO2 at that stage, it was more about missing our last ultrasound of our last baby).
Our hospital does not allow any recordings or photos of the ultrasound machines (there are signs all over the rooms that say this) otherwise I might have tried to make a little video both times. In the end, I just showed him the print outs and it was fine.
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I wanted to make a video of my most recent ultrasound to show the grandparents, but the imaging center doesn't allow you to take video. So I was happy with the CD full of images. I know what you mean though it's totally different when you can see the baby moving around.
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@CatchAFallingStar: Just confirming that you know that this will be a vaginal ultrasound. The baby is still too small to see via belly ultrasound.
Personally, there is NO WAY I would invite either my mother or my MIL to a vaginal ultrasound! But obviously everyone is different.
I don't think your husband will miss that much but it's fun to hear the heartbeat. Like most of the previous posters, I would mostly be concerned about having support in case there is bad news. But I have had three losses so I tend to think more in those terms than hopefully most people would.
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Hubs went to every single one with LO1, and I'm pretty sure didn't go to any with LO2- I just showed him the printout and it was fine! He wasn't less interested but someone had to watch our big girl (and once I had to bring her whole DH worked)! I would not have invited my mom or especially my MIL for a vaginal ultrasound. I absolutely would not have been comfortable with my husband's mother in the room while a probe was all up in my lady bits!
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@caterw: ha!! Good point.
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hubby hasn't made it to any of mine, so i just bring photos home for him!
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@CatchAFallingStar: for baby number 2 i wht alone for a few ultrsounds because DH was traveling. It was ok going alone for me.
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Dh came to probably 50% of ultrasounds for the first baby. With this one he probably won't be able to come to any and it's totally fine. He came to a few appointments (which are pretty boring early on anyway).
We have the anatomy us coming up in 2 weeks; I doubt he'll be able to come to that as he's currently traveling internationally for an extended period. -
My husband couldn't come to the first scan and I brought my mom because I was nervous I'd be alone and get bad news. She loved it!
) and my husband was there since he had to leave work to come take me, and so he got to see for the first time! (At 19weeks). He can't come to my anatomy scan next week either.
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