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I know my milk is in now, but sometimes one or both boobs feel "deflated," so I worry Idon't have enough. I think I may start pumping to try to increase my supply. He seems to get enough to satisfy, but it still makes me nervous. I totally agree with you, @coacheswife123: completely blind!
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@littlebug: @coacheswife123: i had no idea what to expect with BFing, but i got to see two lactation consultations at the hospital and i already went to a BFing support group even though i didn't have a really specific question. it was great to hear what other people were going through and it gave me some tips for what i could be doing better as well! my hospital has a free group once a week and there is even a store nearby me that has groups twice a week with a LC! is there anything like that near you?
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@birdofafeather: we took a class and met with the lactation consultant as well !!! I feel really good about his latch just nervous I'm not feeding enough or he isn't getting enough? worry worry worry haha!
Also, I am like 90 percent sure it IS my milk coming in. He is gulping a lot now and doesn't want to feed as long. I feel like maybe he is getting fuller faster now ?
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@coacheswife123: totally lurking here, but I remember how stressful the early days of BF'ing were! As long as he's swallowing while he's nursing and having enough wet/dirty diapers, then he's eating! It's often so hard to tell in the beginning, but those are the best indicators that baby is getting enough to eat. And congrats!
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@hilsy85: oh thanks for this! he is definitely producing more diapers now that my milk has come in and he is swallowing up a storm now!! Thanks so much!
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@littlebug: Let him sleep! I let Molly go until she wakes up. So far she's only gone 5 hrs, but 6 is amazing!!!
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@shoemama: We only got the 6 hours once, but we've had 5 hours pretty consistently since then. We get 5 hours, then 2-3 hours the rest of the night until we're up at 7:30. I am definitely not complaining!
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okayyy ready for engorgement to be over !
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@birdofafeather: @littlebug: i saw a lactation consultant at the hospital and then a few days later, after several very hormonal crying jags due to wondering when my milk would come in, went to see a lactation consultant. i am now the proud renter of a medela symphony pump (a hospital grade pump), which has been awesome to get my milk to flow and keep up my supply. the latter part is important because little E is the SLEEPIEST NURSER EVER.
i can't take more than 25 minutes of nursing because it's a constant battle of trying to keep him awake. our ped told us to go no more than 3 hours between the end of the last nursing session and the beginning of the new one because he lost weight pretty quickly.
i am jealous of all of you who are getting such long periods of sleep! i honestly think little E could go for long stretches of sleep, but since the ped told us to limit it...i don't know, now i'm doubting whether it's worth waking him up...
so is anyone else constantly questioning what they're doing and the decisions they're making?
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@edelweiss: I think gaining weight is the most important thing. My sister went from the end of the first to beginning of last, and was told it's supposed to be start to start to time the 3 hours.
You will get to space it out eventually... A cool cloth is a good wake up tool.
The Symphony is awesome! I was sad to give mine back after 3 months!
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@edelweiss: CONSTANTLY! I also feel like one minute I've got a gang of it, and the next minute I'm completely lost. I think D is cluster feeding again, and I feel totally inadequate. I definitely need to start pumping just to keep up with this. I have basically been nursing him for the past 4 hours.
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lucky ladies with babies sleeping more than thre hours! max wakes 1.5-2.5hourstoeat. hes been uster feeding alot,but good news is he gained a pound in a week!
I'm up and down every day on if im doing everythung right. ive gone to two lactation appt outside tge hospital for reassurance! lo is going on three weeks and things are slowlygetting better.
I.thinkI might brave it and peek down under to see the damage lol did anyine else bruise/break their taikbone during birth? mine still kills me... ihopeit gets better,I dontknow how ill be able to workout the way I want if it doesnt
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I feel really lost sometimes but then I do something smart (ie:
Last night I put Leo in a size 1 diaper to sleep bc he had a bunch of leaks yesterday - It worked!) that makes me think, well this isn't so tough. -
Snapped this during our newb photoshoot !
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@heartsnsunshine: I didn't do any damage to my tailbone...just everywhere rise, it felt like. I checked things out down there over the weekend cuz I was sure one of my stitches had opened. It's not a sight for the weak of heart. Things were still pretty swollen, so I really had no idea what I was looking at. I ended up going to the OB to get things checked. Everything was still intact, just a small area was excoriated, so I was told to be more liberal with the hydrocortisone. But yeah, brave yourself to be shocked. I was, anyway.
Has anyone taken their littles out for something other than a Dr appointment? I've been going stircrazy, so the other day D and I wentto BRU to get a white noise machine. Today I think we're going to the mall to get Daddy a birthday present. Part of me feels like it's WAY too soon to take him out, but then I also think he's so good and sleeps through it, now is kind of the perfect time.
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@littlebug: we've been to Starbucks a few times, the bank, grocery store, dry cleaner, pedi and lactation consultant. I'm so sick of being in the house. I figure if I wear her, no one is going to be getting too close and I just need to be cautious of hand washing before I touch her. I don't know how people can stay in for weeks on end.
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@littlebug: I'm ready to get out too!! Would love to start going on some walks soon
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@oliviaoblivia: I've had him in his stroller with a swaddle blanket draped over him. I have to try out the carrier! Maybe today for the mall.
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@coacheswife123: I wish I could just go out for walks, but it's way too cold here!
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@heartsnsunshine: I took a look a couple days ago but didn't see much. I had 4 stitches in the front (peri urethral) so that's sore still but I couldn't see them. Just skid marks in the back I'm told. DH saw everything on the day of and said that it didn't look bad. I'll take his word since he's more up on the state of my nether regions than I am! I couldn't see my lady bits for the last 2ish months of pregnancy, so what do I know?!
@dagret: I just figured out that Row was getting too tired after being up for a while and started to get her to sleep sooner after feeding. I felt like a genius the first time it worked!!
@coacheswife123: so cute!
@littlebug: @oliviaoblivia: we've been out a lot because she just sleeps and I cover her up so no one gets close. We're also lucky because it was crazy warm here the week she was born and even now! Happy to live in so cal where I can get out or I would go crazy. I feel like the sun bleaches away the germs! Even the nurse that checked us out of the hospital was like, you need to get out! It's okay, just don't pass her around! So even at places where I know everyone I keep her bundled up and covered. At least fore next couple weeks.
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Ugh at his checkup last Friday we had the super cautious pediatrician who didn't take his kids anywhere for 6 weeks. So DH is getting his undies in a bunch about taking L to church on Sunday (I have to go, I'm joining on Sunday!)
How are the dads coping with the new addition? Mine has been stressed that he's had to travel so much while I have been stressed that I'm stuck in the house. I ran to the post office with L today and the store just to get out!
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@oliviaoblivia: i use the carrier also when i take him out to discourage people from touching him. however since we don't live in walking distance of places, it's kind of a process getting him in and out of the carseat and carrier--sometimes it upsets him.
@dagret: good for you for getting out, even to the post office! ah, it's the little things now to make us feel "normal", right? i'm sorry that your husband has had to travel so much, i'm sure he'd much rather be with you and the baby! my husband is doing alright--actually i feel like he's handling things so well, while i'm a bit of an emotional wreck.
so what is everyone doing to feel like a normal person, and not just a feeding trough? i try to shower everyday and do my usual skincare routine. putting in my contacts makes me feel human, but i gave that up since i'm trying to nap so often and taking the contacts in an out is a pain.
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@edelweiss: I've done the drive, then wear routine and its much harder. Fortunately everything I need is in walking distance.
Good for you putting your contacts in, I just said to DH yesterday that I haven't put mine in in a month! I'm trying hard to take care of myself, I find eating lunch to be the biggest challenge every day. I can manage a shower but remembering lunch is near impossible
@dagret: DH is doing pretty well. He's TERRIBLE at putting on diapers though,whenever he does a change and hands her to me she leaks and I have to change my clothes. It's frustrating for both of us.
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I try to put on real clothes a few times a week, but that's about as normal as I get. I haven't worn my contacts in months, so not wearing them now is nothing new.
Hubs is doing so great. I love watching him with D. On the weekends, he gets up with D at 7:30 and lets me sleep - it's AWESOME.
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I take a shower every day. And i wear my contacts- it makes me feel more human. I also try to do something for myself every day, even if its to just play a game on the iPad for 15 minutes. DH picked up my rental pump today and the pediatrician told me to go ahead and try to introduce a bottle in the next week - i am really excited to let DH feed him soon.
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@dagret: we introduced a bottle early on because little E lost 10% of his body weight by day 4 or something, and we supplemented with formula (so much for my ideas of exclusively breastfeeding and not using formula). we continue to supplement with bottled breast milk, and it is nice to have my husband feed him, not only for their bonding but also to share the responsibility of feeding the baby!
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I went to my grandmothers today. She lives about 30 mins away ! I also went to the grocery store (alone) yesterday while DH was with the baby. I'm finally starting to feel like I'm getting a handle on our new normal which feels nice !
Are you guys alone most of the day ? I miss my husband sooo much while he is at work ! I know it's hard on him to leave, too but I find myself counting down to when he gets home !
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I wear my contacts every day, but I never nap so it doesn't matter. I just can't sleep when no one is with him. And there never seems to be enough time between feedings!
I shower every day. He goes into the bouncer and I bring him I'm the bathroom with me.
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@coacheswife123: I am alone with D for about 10 hours. Yes, it's very hard! And I know Hubs hates not being here.
We've given D one bottle so far - Saturday night we finally opened a bottle of champagne that my sister and BIL had given us to celebrate Hubs' birthday and surviving 2 weeks of new parenthood. So. D got a bottle that night until my milk was safe (I have test strips). He took it fine, so hopefully once I get my new bigger flanges for my pump, I can start building a supply and Jhubs can start taking a feeding now and then.
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I'm home alone with LO. DH could only take a week because of unfortunate deadlines. We've been doing ok on our own though. I'm happy that I have a good freezer stash. My sister (a chef) came for a few days and replenished our freezer. I find cooking to be tricky, baby girl always wants to eat when I've got food burning.
Every day I try to do accomplish one normal task. Laundry takes two days, one to wash and dry and another to fold. I'm starting to get into more of a routine. -
@coacheswife123: DH is in sales, so about half the time he's gone, and the other half he's working at home. So I'm really lucky that sometimes he can hold L so I can go to the bathroom, or eat breakfAst before all of my Cheerios are soggy....(and totally averting a hormonal meltdown by the way.)
That's another thing. I was pretty even keeled throughout pregnancy but postpartum hormones are making me wacky. Anyone else?
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@dagret: My emotions are WAY more labile now than during pregnancy. Especially during late-night feedings that are lasting for over an hour!
I feel like I'm not stimulating or connecting with D enough. I've tried putting him on the activity mat and he lasts there for a minute or two, then starts screaming. I feel like all we do is eat, sleep, and change diapers. I try to keep him up during the day so we can flip his days/nights, but if he's not sleeping then he's fussy and just wants to be held or nursed until he's asleep again. It's exhausting and - frankly - frustrating.
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@littlebug: totally in the same boat as to questioning what i'm supposed to do in terms of stimulation/interaction, and feeling the exhaustion/frustration. after a feeding, i let him stay awake for a little bit, maybe giving tummy time or reading a book to him, but as soon as he yawns i put him to bed. during the first week he would go to sleep, but now that we're 2.5 weeks in, he has started to fuss a lot more so i hear you on holding/nursing them a ton.
i'm sorry i don't have any words of wisdom, just here to let you know that you're not alone. from what i've heard and read, this is just going to be a tough time and i guess it helps to know that it's not just me or my baby, and that others go through the same thing, but it's still tough.
@dagret: oh man, some of the crying spells i've had (over my milk not coming in at first; and feeling like i'm here just to feed and soothe) have definitely been influenced by hormones. i can't remember the last time i cried so hard.
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@edelweiss: @littlebug: same here on the interaction part! And L was up from 930a-1 p today and wouldn't fall asleep till I held him in a football hold on his belly (obviously wouldn't let him sleep like that if I weren't holding him!)
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@dagret: you must be exhausted! it's not just the physical holding part, it's emotionally exhausting trying to make them content and keeping them that way. we're dealing with cluster feeding at nighttime, so it feels like we're nursing/bottle feeding him constantly for hours.
can't wait till it's safe to put him on his belly, because i think he would really like that. i have let him sleep on his side. he tends to go on his side anyway, and a couple of times putting him on his side has calmed him down.
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@edelweiss: We're also cluster feeding in the evenings. It takes me an hour and a half to put him to bed because I sit up there and just keep changing sides. Hubs and I barely get to spend any time together in the evenings. And yes, I agree, I think he'd sleep great on his belly. Also, he falls asleep on the boob, so no post-meal reading or tummy time. I sometimes read to him during daytime feedings, but at night I want to stimulate him as little as possible.
Do you guys have a bedtime routine yet? I take D upstairs around 8 (whenever he starts showing signs of being hungry), change his diaper, sometimes give him a little massage with lotion (I need to make this more of a routine), and then start nursing, which usually takes about 1 1/2 hours till he's calm and ready for bed. I don't know if I should push his nighttime routine back till 10? Like keep him downstairs for the 8pm feeding, then take him upstairs at his next hunger cue? That just seems so late, especially if he STILL takes another 1 1/2 hours to go down!
I just feel like it's so hard to figure out a pattern and establish a routine of any sort.
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@edelweiss: our LO loves his side too.
I also feel like all we do is eat sleep and change diapers. I'm scared he is bored sometimes ! It's also so frustrating when he is fussy but won't eat won't go to sleep And isn't dirty ! We had a little spell of that last night at 2 am and I was so frustrated. Snd, I always feel so guilty for getting frustrated with him after the fact
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@littlebug: L is cluster feeding in the evenings too- I take him up to bed around 10-1030 bc he wakes up every hour to feed from 7-10. Not much of a routine here yet either.
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@littlebug: haha no bedtime routine, unless you count trying everything possible to get him to sleep as a routine. how is the infant massage going? i've done it once and definitely want to eventually work it in as part of a nighttime routine, but right now i feel like i'm not on top of things enough!
@coacheswife123: his nighttime spells of fussiness definitely increased around the 2-week mark! no more putting him down and trusting that he'll fall asleep. oh i miss those days. don't feel guilty about feeling frustrated--it can be incredibly frustrating, and that's okay. frustration is different from anger.
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Thanks, ladies, for commiserating with me! Just hearing that I'm not alone makes me feel loads better! The first thing I said to Hubs when he walked in the door was, "The other January mamas all said they're going through the same things!"
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