Hellobee Boards

My DH's go to response to anything inappropriate is "thank you for sharing your thoughts on the matter." He says it totally kindly and the just walks away. It's a very polite way of making the person feel like an idiot and never say anything again.

@Modern Daisy: I had a friend who gained a lot of weight during pregnancy, and EVERYONE told her about it. She started smiling and saying, "I know...isn't it great?" If someone continued with something mean, she would just say, "I'm pregnant, this is what my body is supposed to do."

I always wished I was brave enough to make a personal comment about the other person, but I'm not that rude. I usually just gave a shocked look, hugged my belly protectively, and waddled away at my top speed... I'm going to follow this thread to see if anyone has good suggestions!

@Modern Daisy: I've actually heard him say "you know, I'm actually not that comfortable with that question!" Again, totally kindly.

I'm way too sassy and mean for that type of thing but my husband is so good at being completely polite when he says it that people don't have time to get offended before he smiles and walks away.

"You know, pregnancy has really shown me that people are not shy about saying whatever they want!"

I never got super rude comments, just ' you look big'. I always responded with 'I am growing a baby.' And left it at that.

@PawPrints: Love this!

So far (because I'm only 14.5 weeks and not really showing much yet in regular clothes) I find people just LOOOOVE to tell me all about their pregnancies, which is totally fine... but my grandmother has told me twice now about how she only gained 9 lbs for 3/4 of her pregnancies, and 18 lbs with one. It's always some sort of pride thing, but you always knows she has some hidden judgey agenda.

@narwhal: @Modern Daisy: I always try to remember that back in their day, women were restricted to 15 pounds of weight gain for a pregnancy. It doesn't make their comments right, but it usually helps me stop myself from feeling sorry for myself when I think about how big I am.

I'm 39 weeks pregnant and a coworker just asked if I was sick today because I'm "not looking very good." Thanks, jerk.

Every time I left the house in my last two weeks of pregnancy someone would ask when I was due and then comment "no way, you're so small!" I gained 35 pounds and my belly was measuring appropriately. All the comments really got to me and made me worry something was wrong so I brought it up with my OB. She was really reassuring about it. I wish people realized just how much what they say can have a effect and learn to keep their mouths shut. There are lots of nice things to say to a pregnant woman that have nothing to do with size.

@Mrs. Pickle: I got the same thing when I was pregnant with my first because of my long torso. I'm sure the constant "but you don't even look pregnant" was intended to be a compliment but it definitely had the effect of making me worry something was wrong. I was actually measuring small so that didn't help but my son was a healthy 6.5 lbs at 38 weeks. I'm now 14 weeks with #2 and barely showing so I'm just waiting for the comments to start up again....

People can be so rude. I had a person constantly say that they didn't think I would make it to my due date because I was so big. She also mentioned how she didn't go to term with her pregnancy, so maybe that was her own personal issue. I ignored her, but I told my husband that I'm not dealing with those negative comments when we get pregnant again. I have always been smaller than most of the women on my husband's side of the family, and they seemed to enjoy the fact that I was gaining weight. SMH They still make comments about me being "healthier" than them in a condescending way. I will stand up for myself this time. I will do it in a tasteful way, but they need to learn how have some tack and deal with their own insecurities. They do not need to like what I have to say. They lost that luxury when they decided to be rude.

@psw27: omg I'm dying laughing here! That's awesome.

OK so I'm a little guilty of being a commenter. Recently I went to a baby shower for a friend I hadn't seen since before she was pregnant. I guess I was excited to see her pregnant and when I walked in she barely even looked pregnant at 8.5 months! "Your belly is so tiny!" slipped out of my mouth. She's always been very confident in her appearance and she's a good friend of mine, so I didn't think it would be offensive. But boy I got some nasty stares from the ladies at the shower! My friend just laughed and hugged me.

So I apologize on behalf on all idiot women out there making inappropriate belly comments.

@psw27: haha That is a good come back.

@narwhal: Ha, my grandma also told me, "I only gained 15 pounds with three of my four pregnancies. I gained 30 with your dad, and that was my worst pregnancy." Like thanks grandma...