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What is she eating that's not healthy? I know my LO only gets "unhealthy" foods if I give them to him, i.e. the best way to make sure he eats healthily is to make sure that that's what I have in the house. We generally (at least for dinner and breakfast) give him what we are having, and make sure there's one item on his plate that he likes. He is very inconsistent--some meals he will eat everything, others he will only eat the carb (rice, pasta) or fruit on his plate. I really try not to stress about it because I have found that it evens out over time.

My toddler has definitely become more picky lately now that she's two, but the foods she eats aren't unhealthy--she's just a toddler and not liking to try new things much these days.

What are the unhealthy things your LO is eating?

Modeling had worked best for me. Saying how yummy my food is. He usually refuses and I don't ever push it. Eventually he may try it. I try to keep everything as low key as possible. Also, I only give one food at a time when I really want something eaten. Ie veggies first.

It's hard but I'm trying not to stress about it. My 3 year old has always been a really good eater but in the last 6 months she's definitely gotten pickier. But I know she's still way less pickier than most. Our big thing is she has to eat "some" protein at dinner and I will always tell her she has to try something. Sometimes she does not want to try and I let her know if she doesn't like it she can spit it back out. Right now it's a 50/50 shot, if she likes it. *shrug*

As for eating healthy, if you don't have it in the house then she won't eat it! She eats what we eat and we very rarely make her a second meal. But we will on occasion prepare a protein differently. For example, tonight we made grilled chicken breast and we just know she will not eat that. So I breaded chicken breast for her and baked that.

We only have "fun" foods once in a while and say it is a treat. On regular days he eats what we eat. If he takes a bite and doesn't like something we let him put it back on his plate and don't make a big deal about it. Sometimes he'll eat the same thing he spat out the next day. If he doesn't eat or only a couple bites we don't worry. Tonight at dinner he drank some milk and declared he was done.

For snacks he gets to pick but it will be between a couple of healthy choices. He is happy he gets to choose and I know it is something healthy.

@ksnow: I would take the list of foods she eats and try to branch them out. So she eats mac and cheese--I would try "green" mac and cheese, basically with pureed broccoli and spinach mixed into the sauce. My LO loves it. She likes hummus--so try white bean hummus, or edamame hummus. She likes pancakes--make sweet potato pancakes.

If my LO finishes the one thing he likes on his plate and wants more, I tell him he needs to have at least 1-3 bites of something else before he can have more of his favored item. Sometimes he will (in which case I know he's hungry) and sometimes he won't (in which case I know he's not). Generally speaking as long as a kid doesn't have any oral motor thing going on, a healthy kid will not starve themselves. It's definitely hard, but letting going of the idea that I have to make him eat has decreased my stress by a lot!

I totally feel your pain. Let me say this--I have twins who are 2.5. One eats everything and the other sounds just like your LO. So I've become fairly convinced that no matter what we do, sometimes a kid will just be picky! But here is what we are doing lately to stress less. They get what we eat. Period. Dinner is always followed by fruit at the end, which he will eat every time. If all he eats is fruit, he still seems to do fine. If I know we are eating a "challenging" food (the other night BBQ pork shoulder...neither liked it, I think the consistency kind of freaked them out), then I might make scrambled eggs or offer cottage cheese. I do like the info on Ellyn Satter's approach: http://www.ellynsatterinstitute.org/
But I'm also here to tell you that, like I said, we offer a variety of healthy foods, eat family meals together, have them help us in the kitchen, yadda yadda yadda, and still I have one voracious eater and one totally picky eater--drives me nuts!!! And my picky one will often refuse foods he's eaten before, so even putting one thing on the plate I know he'll eat is not a great strategy. I just figure if he sleeps through the night he's apparently eaten enough.

My nephew won't eat any meat no matter what. It sound like you have great options, I'd just keep serving it (on her plate) keep the pressure off and cross your fingers? Kids are tough!

"I'm wondering if I should just give her what I'm eating and only that and if she doesn't eat assume she will eventually?"

This is what we do. We eat the same food for every meal. If she doesn't like it, she doesn't eat. She certainly doesn't get dessert. I will put a few pieces of fruit on her plate that we may not get but she doesn't get more unless she eats her veggies and protein. If she's hungry, she eats. If she isn't, she doesn't. If she flips out and decides she hates the meal I made, she goes to bed hungry (and my husband gives me pitiful puppy dog eyes that make me feel like the worst mom on earth).

From my nannying days, we did the "no thank you" bite. We didn't make special meals for the kids, but did try to make it so that it wasn't offensive (i.e. nothing super spicy, etc) and tried to make sure there was one thing on the menu the kid would eat, but not including dessert/fruit. So if I was making salmon and quinoa for dinner and I didn't think she would like that, then I would cook corn for the veggie, which you mention she likes. I would put a spoonful of couscous, a spoonful of corn, and a tiny piece of salmon on her plate and tell her she needs to take a bite of each before she can have more of anything. Put the big serving bowl of hot yummy corn right in front of her so she can make the decision herself. Explain she doesn't have to like it, but that she must take one bite of everything before she can have more. After she takes a bite of everything, you ask if she would like some more salmon, and if she doesn't like it, she can say "no thank you." Same with the couscous. Then offer the corn. But the point is one bite is taken and it must be swallowed. Then she can have as much corn as she wants and she can have dessert or fruit.

If she refuses the one bite, then you just say that she may be excused but she may not have dessert/fruit and there will be no snacks later. The exception would be if she decides within a reasonable timeframe of being excused that she really is hungry and is open to the original terms of dinner. But then we'd reinforce that this is a special exception and that we will not be opening the kitchen up after dinner like this every night.

If she woke up hungry at night, I might offer water and something small like half a banana to keep her until breakfast. And make her brush her teeth. Nothing to encourage waking up, but generally you have to be quite hungry to wake up from sleep in the middle of the night. If the kid woke up chewing their arm off because they haven't eaten in an entire day or something, I might heat up leftovers, but the same rules would apply. No thank you bite, etc. It would suck to do this at like 1am, but I'm a stickler for consistency and I'm huge on manners and I really believe the no thank you bite is important for things like eating at other people's houses and being a polite guest.