Hellobee Boards

I don't enjoy breast-feeding either... With all of our initial issues and the fact that he now refuses to shield-wean, it's not the snuggly romantic perception that some others have. What's helped me is setting specific goals. My current goal is to try and get to three months without mixed feeding and six months before weaning. If I exceed those goals, awesome, but seeing a "light at the end of the tunnel" is helping on those difficult days where he refuses to latch properly, knocks the shield off, or I feel more stuck at home (harder to discretely feed with a shield). Would setting goals help?

@ElbieKay: you have support for whatever way you decide to feed your babe, but I don't like to make decisions in the "heat of battle" so to speak (aka, MOTN feeding gone awry!). How old is your LO? I found that many moms I knew that felt the same way you did, had a turning point at 6-8 weeks for the positive. BFing support groups helped me a lot and hearing from other moms in the trenches.

If after you get some feedback and support and you try whatever you want to help your issues and you still feel the same way, then by all means, do what you need to do for yourself and your kiddo! Good luck mama!

Yup, sometimes it sucks. But the only thing I can tell you is that it does get better and how bf'ing looks now is not how it's going to look down the track.

Having said that, you need to do what's right for your family and what's going to be best for your sanity and emotional health.

Has your LO had his ties cut and is there any specific issue we can help you with?

Hugs to you, Mama, you're doing great!

@ElbieKay: I felt similarly until I went back to work. All of the sudden I looked forward to breastfeeding on the week nights. Although, i do still feel touched out on the weekends when it's all BF all the time. I think your plan to reevaluate is a really good one.

@ElbieKay: We had major issues and my LC suggested that I supplement to give myself a break. I was about 7-8 weeks pp and started subbing a night pump session for a formula bottle and sleeping through that feeding (DH's turn!) and it made a world of difference. My supply rebounded just fine when I decided to go back to EBF but I credit supplementing with saving our nursing relationship.

I wish I hadn't put so much pressure on myself to EBF. I regret spending so much time strapped to a pump and stressing over supply. Don't make that mistake. Enjoy your baby and follow your heart.

@ElbieKay: It might. I was worried about it affecting my supply but it rebounded quickly when I decided to go back to EBF. Maybe you could do it 2-3x a week instead of every night? I really think a longer stretch of sleep would help you feel better. Those early days are so brutally exhausting. I remember being in your shoes and I wish I could hug you through the computer. It's rough but it does get better.

Just wanted to pop in and say I understand....I didn't enjoy BFing either and it was a struggle . In the end bottle feeding was much more of a warm and fuzzy bonding experience for me.

I guess it would depend on how important bfing is to you. Would you look back and wish it had work out? If so, Id power through and try to find some helpful resources since everyone says it does get better as time goes on.

However, for me, bfing was never a huge goal of mine... I think the long term benefits are largely overstated so when the going got tough I didn't feel badly quitting and EPing. I EPed & supplemented for 6 months but I have a year long mat leave...if I had to go back to work earlier I would have skipped the pumping and just switched to formula.

I did feel a lot of guilt in the beginning (I think because society told me I *should* feel guilty?) but now that I've seen how LO has grown and flourished on formula and I have my mental sanity in tact I am 100% happy with our feeding journey and will not attempt bfing with any future LOs, I will either EP or FF from the beginning.

But like I said - bfing was never a major goal of mine so I don't lament what might have been. The great part about hellobee is that if you do want to power through and keep on keeping on , there's lots of awesome mamas to support you in your bfing goals also! All this to say, it's okay to switch to formula. It's okay to keep breastfeeding. Whatever is best for you, your baby, and your family - I support you !

Good luck

I also had major nipple pain and trauma, and at 4 weeks it was AWFUL. I was in so much pain and thought it would never get better. But it did. By 8.5 weeks, the pain was gone and we were nursing well. So things will PROBABLY (like 90%) get better. But it's totally up to you if you feel like you can make it til then. It's really hard when in the moment it's painful and uncomfortable and preventing you from actually feeling connected to the baby. SO whatever choice you make is a good one. I agree with maybe setting goals--like giving it til 6 weeks, at first, and then 12 weeks, and then see how you feel, especially if you're going back to work then! good luck!

Good luck to you, with whatever you choose. I hated BFing, both of my kids. I never got that warm tingling bonding experience that people talk about, and I'm ok with that. Bottle feeding was just so much more of a bonding experience for me and my children. You truly have to decide what is best for you and your family.

I'm sorry. Pumping really is the pits. My outlook on pumping was different when I was at work. Even if I couldn't be with my baby during the day, at least I could do something and have some time to think about her.

The LC I saw told me to feel free to use a bit of lanolin when pumping. She said for sensitive damaged skin, the lanolin can help with the friction of the pump.

Same as previous posters, I absolutely hated it for like 6 weeks. truly loathed it And gave my dh dirty looks every time he brought me the baby. Like "i JUST fed her and you want me to do it again?" Pure torture. But at 8 weeks it got better and by 12 weeks I was loving it. So if you are really determined to make it work then stick it out and set small goals for yourself. Like one feed, one day, or one week. If you can't bear another day then quit and don't look back!! Either way is perfectly fine, your baby will be healthy either way.

@ElbieKay: those early days are hard even with ff. It will get easier no matter what you decide. I know lots of people are passionate about bf around here but the further I get from the infant stage the more I feel like it wasn't a big deal. LO got some breast milk and I did what I could at the time. I just would feel bad if I said go ahead and quit and then you quit and in a week felt that feeding wasn't the "real" problem (maybe isolation, boredom, whatever was) and then had to deal with the bf guilt that so many of us feel when bf doesn't work out for whatever reasons. But you are doing great, you aren't alone in your worries, and it WILL get better.

@ElbieKay: So glad you made it through! Did you go to the mom's group on Tuesdays?

@ElbieKay: glad it got better.. good for you for sticking it out for 8 weeks! I don't think I could have!

@ElbieKay: so glad it got better! yay!

@ElbieKay: yay, what a great update!