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Me! I cried over it a ton. I hated it and couldn't stand it and then one day it just seemed easier. We are now at 12.5 months and she only nurses twice a day at this point.

I just took it one day at a time.

It was not my favorite thing, but it does get faster. After the first few months, my DS was done in 10 min, and eating a lot less often and at predictable times. Knowing that we couldn't afford formula helped me keep going. Knowing that people survived without formula for decades made me willing to wean at 10 months when DS clearly was done with BF and just wanted cow's milk.

@MrsGeePerez: all I can say is that it's ok not to love it and that you are an important part of the breastfeeding partnership! It was ok to get your LO 's ties cut so you had less pain, your comfort matters and you being in pain doesn't help anybody.

If switching to formula is what you need to do then it's ok to do that, make the choice that's right for your family.

Hang in there, Mama, you're doing great!

I wanted to quit so many times in the first 6 months with DS2 (with DS1 I only went 6 weeks and then pumped and always had misgivings about it). He was a massive spitter upper and nursed every 2 hours for so long and was a horrible night sleeper. I was dairy free for spit up until 7 months. I have to say that once I resumed my normal diet I stopped fantasizing about quitting all the time. Then suddenly at 9 months we were down to 5x a day and then 10 months it was 4x. And then I really started liking it, actually. We are at 13.5 months and down to one session and plan to be weaned by 14 months.

I wanted to breastfeed, but I certainly had no fantasies about how awesome it would be, my best friend had a difficult time and I got a realistic view of how it might go. We had major problems at first she got dehydrated and we ended up at the PICU week 1. For weeks I was pumping and nursing (then giving her a 2 oz bottle of pumped milk) every 3 hours round the clock, that ordeal took at least an hour every time. I got mastitis at 10 weeks. It certainly was not easy. What was the most difficult for me is that it took forever. 40 ish minutes a feeding at 8 a day, but I stuck it out. Then it's like a switch went off and we got in our groove around 4 months or so she got so much more efficient. At six months it improved again. Now she's 10.5 mo and it's so easy she eats for 5-10 minutes a feeding about 6 times a day. I also pumped a few times a day until 6 months- it was nice that M could give her bottles. Now it's nice to have a tool to calm her when she's upset and get her back down in the MOTN.

I am pro food. You have to do what right for you. But the hardest part is behind you IMO. I'd encourage you to give yourselves a little more time. You are in the trenches. Hugs!

@MrsGeePerez: I am so sorry you
Are having a rough time! My son had allergies too and it made it so difficult. We did eventually stop at 4 months and switch to nutramigen. It was a hard decision, but definitely the right one for us.

One thing I want to mention: for us, because it was allergy related, insurance covered the formula. If we bought it at the store, I just had to submit my receipts and was reimbursed 80%. Then a really helpful insurance person told me I could order it from a medical supply company and it would be 100% covered. Having the expenses covered helped tremendously so that might be something you want to look into.

@MrsGeePerez: my daughter also had MSPI, and I have flat nipples and large breasts. We used a nipple shield for a long time. It was STRESSFUL.

But I will say it got easier for me and LO as she got a little bigger (easier latch), I learned how to eat an MSPI diet, and we settled into a routine. I would say I only really started loving it around 6 months. I used to stand in the kitchen and cry because I was hungry and couldn't find something to eat. I would recommend searching for MSPI on these boards. There are lots of suggestions for how to make things easier!

@MrsGeePerez: I switched to EPing at about 4 months. I too was BF, but it just wasn't sitting well with me. I was constantly stressed that she was getting enough, she was distracted, it just wasn't "smooth". Anyway, EPing is tough in its own right but I like having more control over the entire situation. I'd check with a LC to see if the flanges fit you properly. What pump do you use? I was using the wrong size flanges and had a much better output once I was sized correctly. And oddly enough at about 8 months I had to have a 27 mm on the L and 24 mm on the right.

I just quit pumping (almost 10 months) and we are fully 100% formula now. And I'm totally happy because of it. Its $$$ (Holle) but everyone is happy now Good luck. Whoever said BF was easy needs their head examined. I'm sure it is for some people but it is totally NOT easy for others.

This is such a difficult post to reply to because the fact is, if you stick it out, it will probably get easier..... and Id hate to think of you missing out on that, after all you've been through, because I said the wrong thing at the wrong time. But you really sound like you don't want to keep breastfeeding and so I want to tell you that formula feeding is fine. My daughter was FF from birth and she is absolutely fine. If breast is best, its really marginal IMO. You do not need a reason not to breastfeed - "because I didn't want to continue" is fine (although it sounds like you have a bunch of compelling reasons as well).

I really want to BF my second but ONLY because I want that experience. It sounds as though BF is ruining your experience - don't let it.

That's just my opinion. Good luck

I'm so sorry. You are in a tough position.

One of the biggest things that helped me was the breastfeeding mothers support group offered by our hospital. I got to meet lots of mothers twice a week as well as a IBLC to sort through the various issues that constantly arise. I've nursed two kids and said there is no way I could do it on a special diet. But if that's your better option than formal right now great job!!

You don't have to do it. It's completely okay to not like it and not want to do it. That's a perfectly valid choice. And you shouldn't base your life around "I can do X while other can't, so I should suck it up and be grateful". Live for you, not anyone else.

IMO, it's more important to enjoy your baby and not resent them because of feeding. Check out the fearless formula feeder page on blog/Facebook. There are a lot of stories about women and why they chose to ff, or why they had to. You're not alone.

We were never able to breast-feed because DD could not figure out how to latch. But I was trying to EP instead and I just hated it. We switched to formula feeding around 6 weeks and life was much better for it. Your mental health and happiness and lack of stress (or at least minimized stress!) is important too.

@Keybee: Don't feel guilty, mama. We all just do what we have to do.

@Greentea: OMG I could have joined that group with you!

@MrsGeePerez: Breastfeeding is so so hard. For something so natural, it is so stressful. I really feel like our struggles and the pain robbed me of some enjoyment with my son. When he cried to be fed, so did I because I was dreading the pain. LO was born with a tongue tie and lip tie but, even after having them cut, I saw very little difference. I always felt like it was two steps forward one step back. I tried EPing, saw every LC in the area, watched many youtube videos (the best was about a nipple sandwich.) I HATED breastfeeding. One day, I fed him on one breast and it didn't hurt and then the other one eventually didn't hurt. I simply had to wait for his mouth to get bigger. It was an extremely difficult experience and no one can properly prepare you for it but you are doing everything for your LO and, in the end, your sanity and happiness will make you a wonderful mom (not how you feed your LO.) Wishing you all the best.

@MrsGeePerez: I have been there my son was mspi (banshee 12-15 hours a day) and my daughter is calmer but more complicated elimination diet (corn, legumes, fruit). We had to do neocate because neutragamin wasn't even enough for him. That's super expensive.

I love la leche but with difficult babies (mspi and tongue tie) they just aren't there. Baby girl had a tongue tie. You did a good thing because that can effect so much more than just bf. It can hurt speech and even the ability to take a bottle. So don't let that keep you doing something you hate.

The only thing I can recommend is to see your doctor. I have seen many moms feel this way, quit breastfeeding and then find out they had post part mum depression. Not saying you do but you may find another ear helpful (and leave your baby with someone for that appointment).

Breastfeeding is not all roses all the time. Nothing is. It can suck royally. But so many things about being a mom are wonderful and horrible. Don't let one thing hang you up right now because something else is coming down the pipeline. Cherish the good parts and make the bad whatever you need to for your family.

I knew I wouldn't enjoy breastfeeding and would resent DD so we did formula from the get go. I'm so happy with my decision. She is thriving and we are so happy together-and DH gets to feed her too!